Know Thyself
by Konfetti
Summary: Set after From Dead to Worse. Sookie gets a visit from a Viking and the night goes terribly awry! Spoilers for first 8 novels.
1. Chapter 1

**Know Thyself**

It was just past dark.

I was standing in front of my fire enjoying the warmth; I had just added another log and I took a moment to watch the flames. I heard the familiar and comforting pops and crackles as the embers sparked and danced. It was almost the end of the year and the recent temperatures had been unusually cold. There had been chatter at Merlottes the night before that we were probably going to get some snow. A few of the old-timers had talked of aching knees and backs and hands - apparently those maladies were better predictors than the weather channel. Most people in Bon Temps weren't too excited about the prospect of snow.

I felt a smile curve on my lips.

I knew at least one person who would be thrilled if the white flakes arrived.

My smile faded.

That person...vampire, I corrected myself...had been incognito for months. At least to me. Eric Northman, large and in-charge head honcho of Area Five, owner of Fangtasia and a big pain in my butt most of the time had fallen off the face of the earth as far as I was concerned. Oh, he was still around, doing whatever it is he does over in Shreveport. I saw ads for Fangtasia in the newspapers and his second-in-command, Pam, had checked in with me a few times via phone. I knew their Vampire bar business was booming and things were starting to get back to normal (normal for them, which is still a far stretch from my definition of normal) since the take-over of the state by the Nevada vamps. But despite his assurances that he would call me when his work allowed, Eric had not made so much as made a whisper in my direction. And that was two and half months ago. Head-rolling Vampire boss or not, no one is _that_ busy. I hated to admit it, but his silence kind of irked me. And it irked me that I was irked about it. I needed to think about something else.

I glanced at the clock. It was nearly 7:00. Most nights I would be slinging drinks and making small-talk with the patrons at Merlottes at this hour, but tonight I was free. And alone. It felt odd in a way, it had been so long since I had had the house all to myself. What to do....what to do....

I went into the kitchen and poured myself a glass of sweet tea. I headed back to the warmth of the fire, sat the glass on an end table and plopped down heavily on the comfy sofa. I grabbed up my latest mystery book, curled my legs up underneath me and settled in for a relaxing evening of doing absolutely nothing. I smiled to myself. Maybe in a little while I would take a bubble bath and re-paint my toe nails. I was way overdue for some 'me time'. As I started to read I felt myself begin to relax from the inside out and a feeling of joy began to spread in my chest. I felt happy and safe and warm.

The knock on my door was so sudden and unexpected that I jumped.

I pushed myself up with a little sigh; I laid the book open on the couch to save my place. I should have known something would happen to disrupt my quiet evening. I wondered if maybe Bill had decided to pop over for a visit, as he sometimes did in the evenings. Jason maybe? But that seemed unlikely considering we really weren't on speaking terms. Well, I thought to myself, whoever it was would just have to keep on trucking down the road. My plans for the evening did not include company and as much as I hated to be rude I had things to do; chapters to read, nails to paint and tea to drink. My night was gloriously full.

I peeped through the peephole (go figure) to see who was coming to call on me. I felt my eyes go wide and I took an involuntary step back, my mouth falling open in a most unbecoming fashion as I registered the identity of my guest.

Eric.

I rolled my eyes at the ceiling. I should have known I wasn't getting the warm fuzzies just from the fire and solitude. I hadn't seen Eric in so long I had forgotten how he affected me. No, no, no....I chastised myself. I couldn't let myself think like that; it wasn't Eric that affected me so profoundly. It was the _blood bond _we shared.

I took a deep breath and opened the door. Eric was standing there in all his glory. His tall, gorgeous, striking, blond glory. With a tight T-Shirt that stretched over his broad chest and powerful arms. And jeans that fit just as nicely. An expensive looking dark jacket, open so I could see the shirt, completed the ensemble. And his eyes....wow, had they always been that blue?

Okay...maybe it wasn't just the blood tie thing that affected me.

"Sookie," he said, his deep voice familiar and comforting despite the months I hadn't heard it.

"Eric," I responded hesitantly. What was he doing here? "This is a surprise."

"May I come in?"

He said that like I had a choice. Nice touch.

I nodded and moved aside to let him pass. He stepped by me as he entered, very close, and I noticed with some wariness that he smelled absolutely wonderful. When he was in the light I saw that his hair was braided in an intricate fashion, in a way I had admired once before. He was pushing all the right buttons with me and I wondered if he was doing it on purpose. I suspected strongly he was, since Eric rarely - if ever - did anything by chance.

He gazed down at me with those intense blue eyes. I was suddenly and acutely aware that he and I were alone. All alone. In my house. Alone. And did I mention we were alone?

The situation was a little uncomfortable. The last time Eric and I had been alone in this house things had happened. A lot of things. Multiple times. Then he lost his memory of that time. Then his memory came back. Ta da! He told me we were going to have a talk about that - about our time together, now that he could remember it. But that was months ago. Could that be the reason for his unexpected visit? Did he somehow know I was off work tonight and that my roomies were off having fun elsewhere? I searched his face for a clue but found nothing useful. His expression was unreadable. I tasted the atmosphere tentatively, trying to get a read on his emotions via our bond. Nada. And he hadn't spoken a word yet since he walked through the door. That in itself was telling. Eric was nothing if not direct. When he had something to say he said it, generally without preamble.

I felt my shoulders relax in resignation. Yep. This was it. Big Talk time. Leave it to Eric to pick the time and place without letting me know. A little warning would have been nice. Though I had gone over possible conversational scenarios at least a hundred times I still felt nervous as hell; scared even. And that bothered me more than I wanted to admit. After all, what was there to be nervous about? What happened happened...and it was wonderful and perfect. But it was _over_. And the beautiful, memory impaired Eric I had been with was long gone. Or at least securely buried. No amount of talking was going to change any of it.

The silence dragged on for a bit until I realized I was still standing there with one hand on the still-open door. _Idiot!_ I turned slowly, shutting the door purposefully. I took my time, hoping he would say something.

He was looking at me when I turned back around. I shifted uncomfortably.

"Would you like something to drink?" I asked him, falling into my southern hospitality routine easily. I always kept blood on hand right alongside coffee, bottled water and soda.

"No, thank you," he said after a moment. The way he was staring at me I felt very.....stared at.

"So what brings you out here anyway?" I asked, moving past him towards the fire. I busied my hands by grabbing the old poker and prodding a few logs, causing the flames to rouse a bit.

Eric came to stand right behind me. I could feel his presence. It was comforting, and a little frightening. It had been quite some time since our last blood exchange and I thought for sure this thing we had, this bond, would go away. Or at least weaken. But it was as strong as ever. Maybe even stronger, but since it had been so long since we had seen each other I couldn't be sure.

"I brought something for you," Eric said softly, reaching into an inside pocket of his jacket. He handed me a white envelope with the Fangtasia logo in the return address spot.

Well, whatever I was expecting, this wasn't it. I felt a little embarrassed at my assumptions. Maybe Eric was here on business, not for other, much more personal reasons. But some part of my brain registered a pang of sadness when I contemplated that. I shook off the feelings as a took the envelope from his hand. I flipped it over; it wasn't sealed, the back flap was just tucked in. I looked up at Eric with curiosity.

"What's this?"

"Your payment for services in Rhodes."

I felt my eyes go wide. I looked down at the envelope, then back up at Eric. He nodded with a ghost of a smile. I pulled open the flap and couldn't keep back a sharp intake of breath as I looked at the check. It was more money than I made at Merlottes in six months. It was money I had well earned, but I had written it off when the Queen, Sophie Ann, had died and the King of Nevada had taken over the state. I noted the the signature on the check; Felipe De Castro it said. So I'd been paid in full by the the handsome King himself. Nice.

"Eric," I started to say something but then just shook my head. My brain was spinning. It's not every day a barmaid in Bon Temps is presented with this much money.

"I am sorry it took so long to get to you," Eric said.

"I didn't think I'd get it at all, to be honest. Not after..." I let my voice trail off, not sure if the subject of the take-over was a sore spot. But Eric just smiled.

"When a takeover of a Kingdom occurs it is much like a business venture. The new regime gets the territory and all the income and personnel that go with it. They also assume the debts."

I couldn't help but grin.

"Tell the King I said thanks," I said as sat the envelope up on the mantle above the fireplace, leaning it against some knick-knacks. "I appreciate you coming all the way out here to bring it to me. I know you're probably real busy in Shereveport." My voice sounded just a tad accusing I thought. I hadn't intended that, but the truth was, I was a little hurt that Eric hadn't called me since the night he and Pam brought news of the new King's offer of protection.

Eric paused, then nodded. "It has been quite busy, yes. But the King and Sandy finally departed two nights ago so I was able to make time to deliver this to you personally."

"No more being 'overseen'?" I asked him, trying to very hard to lighten my voice lest any more unintended emotion seep through.

"Not as much."

I started to say something else but then Eric took a step towards me. He reached over and placed his hands on my arms and moved in very close. I looked up into his face. It felt much like he was going to bend over and kiss my cheek, as he had done several times in the past before departing. Again, I felt the sudden tug of pain in my heart. I realized with some irritation that I didn't want him to leave yet.

As it turned out, he didn't either. Instead of kissing my cheek, he bent down and gently touched my lips with his own. It was a delicate kiss, gentle, but the effect on my body was instant. I shuddered involuntarily and felt a surge of want. It was ridiculous that such a small contact could arouse such feelings inside me. But, I reasoned with myself, it had been quite a while since I had enjoyed male company and I'm a flesh and blood woman with desires and needs. And Eric was gorgeous. And I liked him. Plus that darned blood bond wasn't helping matters.

Eric stepped back, moving his hands down my arms to take both my hands in his. I felt a curious need to say something to fill up the silence, but I kept my mouth shut. After all, Eric had come to me. I figured it was his turn to think of something to say, if he wanted to.

And he wanted to.

"I am very sorry I have not contacted you before tonight. These past weeks have been a crucial time for us. For me, and for those under my charge. I had to - what is the phrase? 'Keep my head in the game' to secure our position."

I nodded. I got that. Vamp business wasn't like human business. In my world, when one company takes over another, workers might have to worry about losing their jobs and pensions. With vamps, they have to worry about losing body parts. And Eric had a lot of lives to account for. Vamps and humans both that worked for him and depended on him to keep them safe. It was a daunting task I imagine. One I didn't envy. But Eric was apparently very good at what he did - whatever that was. Good enough that he was the only Sheriff in Louisiana the new regime hadn't decided to kill straight out. His abilities saved him - and all those that worked under him. I might very well be included in that. Lord knows Eric saved me directly more than once.

I felt a little light blink on in my head as I realized the very things about Eric that had always warned me to keep him at a safe distance were the very things that made him such a hot ticket in the Vamp world. As if I needed another reminder of just how different we were.

I noticed that Eric was gazing into the fire now. There was something in his face I couldn't get a read on. I felt a sudden urge to reach over and put my arms around him and I had no idea where that was coming from.

Things were feeling a little wierd. Okay, _a lot_ wierd. Here we were, an ancient Viking vampire and a Telepathic Barmaid, alone together in a house where we had sexed up every room, taking turns staring into a fire and not talking. My patience level was starting to get low. Maybe Eric had centuries ahead of him to wait for the perfect time and the correct words, but I sure didn't. I took a deep breath and exhaled.

"Do you need to get back to Fangtasia?" I asked, pleased with myself at my calm delivery of the question.

To my suprise, Eric answered immediately.

"Yes, I do need to get back. There is still much work to do and I cannot allow myself to become complacent just because the King has left. Victor is still here to keep watch over the Kingdom. And me. He is capable but I do not trust him. And he certainly does not trust me. Not yet. I need to keep well ahead of him."

I nodded and started towards the door, intending to walk him out. An arm around my waist stopped me. I froze as Eric came to stand behind me, his right arm pulling me against him, my back to his chest, and his left hand wound into my hair. Uh oh. I felt my breathing quicken at the proximity, at the closeness. I felt Eric lean down, felt his lips brush my skin. He spoke into my ear quietly, though there was no one else around to hear him.

"Just because I need to get back does not mean I am going."

His voice was smooth and warm, like hot butter. I could feel the vibrations in his chest as he spoke all the way into my bones. He kissed my neck just below my ear, sending a chill down my spine. I could feel his smile against my skin and he trailed a few more feather light kisses down my neck.

Ok, that just about did it for me. I shut my eyes for a few seconds, trying to steel my resolve. I tried to remember why it was I was annoyed at Eric. Oh, right - he had been avoiding me for months, he had promised to call me when he could and he never did, he was a master manipulator Vampire boss. He.....my train of thought came to a sudden stop when I felt his tongue dart into my ear very lightly. Oh, who cares!

My self-righteous indignation melted into something more akin to self-serving lust. I was close to surrendering, so close. I felt beautiful at that moment. Beautiful and wanted and needed. I leaned my head back against Eric's broad shoulder, closing my eyes and just enjoying the moment. Then I remembered the moment wasn't real. All these emotions were by-products of some kind of spell, whatever magic was held in our so-called blood bond. As real as it felt, I knew deep down it wasn't. The way a few too many beers sometimes made weak men feel tough and invincible, this blood thing made me feel close to Eric in a way that was wonderfully blissful. I wondered if he was under the same spell. I wondered when the buzz was going to wear off. And it would, right? And when it did and I was seeing clearly again, I knew I would have major regrets for anything stupid I did while I was drunk with this bond.

With effort, I opened my eyes and pulled away from Eric. He kept me pinned against him for a few seconds longer, like he was making sure I was serious in my attempt to move away, then he let me go slowly. I turned to face him.

"Eric," I began to say before he interrupted me.

"Why do you always pull back from me, Sookie?"

He looked quite serious. He took one step forward and I took one back. He stopped.

"I remember a time you didn't mind so much." He wasn't smiling but his eyebrows raised slightly. Yep, definately felt the Big Talk coming on.

I shook my head. "That was almost a year ago, Eric. And it was...different then. You were different."

"Tell me how I was different, my lover."

Oh hell, why did he have to call me that? Just hearing the words made my temperature rise.

"You know very well what I'm talking about. You got your memory back now. Isn't it obvious?" I was not going to stand here and give Eric a scene by scene analysis of all the things he said and did while he was cursed that were contrary to his normal personality. Eric was undeterred.

"You took care of me. It was quite late. You were very tired. But yet you took me into your home and cared for me. You cleaned my wounds, dressed me and allowed me to lay by your side while you slept."

I rolled my eyes. So, this was about _me_ now. I thought we were talking about him. Way to deflect the conversation, Eric. I was beginning to feel handled.

"Yes, Eric, I did all those things for you. What's your point?"

"Why would you do that for me?"

"Well, I am in your _retinue_, remember. Maybe I thought I had to." There. I was proud of that one.

He actually had the audacity to smile.

"No," he said simply.

"No?" I was getting a little irritated. If he had something to say, he needed to just say it.

"If you have something to say, Eric, just get on with it." There we go. Thoughts into action. Hear me roar.

Eric glanced around for just a moment, then walked over and sat on my couch. He leaned forward, resting his arms on his knees. He looked up at me.

"Do you still have feelings for me, Sookie?"

Well, sure. Annoyance, lust, fear, friendship, affection. Not always at the same time and not always in that order.

"Do we really have to talk about this?" I asked him, averting my eyes.

"I think we do." His tone was gentle, but I knew there was no way he was going to give up. I searched through the conflicting thoughts racing in my head trying to get a grip on myself. I had been dreading this talk, but also impatient for it. It upset me that I there was a part of me that was hopeful...but for what, exactly?

Eric raised an eyebrow, waiting. Did I have feelings for him, that was the question, right?

That sincerely threw me a bit when I really thought about it. Eric - the cursed Eric - and I had voiced our affection for each other. I felt my face redden as I recalled the events that took place after those declarations. We never admitted love, thank heavens, but something close to it. As I stood there looking at him, I knew I couldn't deny that even now, yes, I did have feelings for the big Viking with the bigger ego. Eric was amusing, he made me laugh and he was an incredible lover. He was a decent guy as far as vampires go. He could even dance. But with the blood bond thing constantly humming in the background, I wasn't sure how much I could really trust what I was feeling when I was around him.

"Eric, I don't know."

Honesty is good, right?

His expression changed. He looked....well, I would have said he looked disappointed if it was anyone else. But with vampires it was hard to be sure.

"I think you do know, lover."

"Oh, so now you're going to tell me how I feel?" I knew I sounded defensive, but I didn't care. Eric was always tossing out little predictions as though he was a gypsy with a crystal ball.; telling strangers I was his 'future lover' (ok, that one did end up being right) telling Quinn I would be his, telling me I would enjoy the blood tie. He said it like it was already set in stone, like I had no say in those events at all. I wasn't about to be one of those women that let a man drag her around by the ear, blindly clinging to him like a lifeline just because he was handsome or had a good job or a nice car. Women that felt downright honored just to have a man's approval. I saw enough of that in this town.

"Here's the deal, Eric," I took a breath, feeling a rush of honesty bubbling up. "I do like you." Most of the time, I added silently. "Like I already told you, those nights that you spent here were a lot of fun. You were very sweet to me, and you weren't prancing around like you were God's gift to the world. You weren't always on the phone scheming and plotting with 'your people'," I raised up my fingers when I said that, making little quotations. "You just wanted to talk, and laugh and, you know, have sex with me. We were in a little bubble of an alternate reality and it was nice to escape the real world for a while. But that's gone." I felt some pain as I said the words. I hoped fervently that I wouldn't start crying, as I sometimes did when I was angry or confused.

Eric looked at me for a long moment, then stood up and moved close to me. He took my hand and I let him pull me to the couch. We sat down together. I pressed myself into the soft cushions and shut my eyes, trying to calm down. I was mad at myself for getting so worked up while Eric seemed completely calm. It wasn't fair.

"My feelings for you are not _gone_, my lover," Eric spoke quietly, sitting partially turned toward me on the couch. I looked at him, quite stunned, and saw his eyes were glowing like blue gems, warm and intense. I looked down, not sure what to say. I saw he was holding both my hands in his, something I hadn't even noticed before. Eric continued speaking, but I kept my eyes on our hands. "I had forgotten what it was like to feel such happiness. To have someone care for me unconditionally, as you did. You asked nothing of me. You gave yourself over to me willingly. You didn't pull back from me, you weren't afraid of me. I would like very much to feel that happiness again."

I raised my eyes to meet his. I could almost feel the truth in his words. He wanted me, and I had a powerful desire to give him what he wanted. I felt myself drawn to him like a magnet. I felt the whirlwind of negative thoughts and emotions slipping away like sand through fingers. It felt so good to be here with Eric, to have him close to me. I saw him shift position slightly and he leaned toward me for a kiss. My heart rate rose in anticipation. Our lips touched, gently at first then stronger. He lifted his hands to place them on my neck, his mouth working in earnest. I felt myself drifting away at his touch. It was perfect. Nothing in the world could ever be as natural as being in Eric's arms...

_Natural._

The realization of what was happening hit like a lightening bolt. I pulled back as much as could with Eric's strong hands holding me. He knew I was trying to disengage from him and he whispered 'No," into my mouth and kissed me even harder, his right hand moving down my side, brushing my breast slightly on the way down. I was hanging on to sanity by a thread. It would have been so easy to yield to my desires; too easy. I wanted to, wanted it more than anything else in the world. That's why I knew I had to stop.

I pushed as hard as I could against his chest and finally got a reaction. He broke off the kiss but only moved his face inches away, looking into my eyes. His fangs were fully extended and I was pretty sure other parts were, too. I shut my eyes against the thought. I couldn't let myself think about that.

"Sookie, " he began what I assumed would be a protest and I cut him off.

"This isn't real, Eric," I blurted out without thinking. I pushed as far away as I could from him, giving myself a few more precious inches of space. I shook my head but he didn't move.

"It feels quite real, my lover" he said with a very Eric-esque grin. I could almost taste his need in the air. I was doing my best to look anywhere but at his face, afraid my will would crumble. "I want you. I want every part of you. I want you to trust me and talk to me the way you did when I stayed here with you. I want to..." he stopped, waiting until he caught my eyes again before continuing. "I want to love you."

Okay, didn't see that one coming! I was now more certain than ever that it wasn't just me who was in a very large, very confusing emotional pickle. Eric Northman does not declare intentions of love to human women. He might seduce them, feed from them, even like some of them, but no way would he consider loving them. It was arrogance or blind stupidity to entertain the idea that I was different from any other woman he had known in the past thousand years. I was done deluding myself, and I figured it was time Eric was, too.

I wriggled away from him and stood up and crossed the room to stand by the fire. I turned to him. He hadn't moved.

"Did you ever stop and think that maybe all the happiness you say you felt had nothing to do with me?"

His brows closed together. "No."

He liked that word a lot it seemed. I sighed.

"Eric, you spend all your time being the boss. I know you said you liked it, but you also said it was nice to have some time to yourself without being surrounded by people always wanting things from you. When you were cursed, you were free from all of it. All that vampire political stuff had disappeared for you. Maybe that's where the real happiness came from. It was kind of like...like you were on a vacation that was long overdue. The fact I happened to be there wasn't the most important thing."

"Is that what you think?" he asked, his voice almost amused.

"Yes, I do." I'd had a lot of time to think about the events and as much as I sometimes enjoyed fantasizing that Eric really did love me and really did want to stay with me forever, I knew it was just that - a fantasy.

Eric looked thoughtful, not an expression I was used to seeing from him.

"Perhaps you're right. I admit that there are times I grow weary of the realities of my existence." He sat back on the couch and shrugged. "But the fatal flaw in your theory is that I am here, right now. And I know what I feel for you has nothing to do with my needing a vacation."

How weird was this? Always in control Eric the viking was calmly spilling his emotional guts while I was jumping up and down and pacing the room like a scared rabbit.

"Why do you have to fight me so hard, Sookie?" he asked.

"Fight you? I'm not fighting you," I answered immediately, a little taken aback. Was that what I was doing? I wasn't sure.

"Do you not enjoy being with me?"

The big elephant in the room just made it's presence known.

"Yes, Eric, I do enjoy being with you. That's the problem!"

"Excuse me?"

I put my hands over my eyes and let out a little growl.

"I hate the way I feel around you! It drives me crazy! I feel warm, and safe and beautiful, and I can always feel where you are. It's not normal. It's not natural. I keep hoping it will fade or wear off, but it hasn't."

"And it won't," Eric said simply, leaning forward. He looked concerned. "Many women would welcome the feelings you described."

"I am not 'many women'. You ask me how I feel about you and I tell you I don't know because I don't! I can't know how I really feel. And you can't know how you feel about me, either!"

"I can, and I do," Eric stated emphatically.

"Well, if that's true then I guess this blood bond thing only works one way." I sounded exactly like I felt. Despondent.

"You know that's not the case. I feel much the same when we are together. Not exactly, of course, but similar. With the exception of occasional bomb scares, I enjoy our tie very much. I wish you would, too."

This much honesty from Eric was almost frightening. I didn't know what to make of it. But that wasn't the real issue. The problem was he wasn't understanding what I was trying to tell him. Maybe he was content to live in a non-reality but I wasn't.

"Look, this is the thing; I am sick to death of being jerked around. First, there was Bill who was apparently ordered to dump me and go running off to Lorena." Saying her name still caused me pain. "He was _ordered_. And he did it," I snapped my fingers, "just like that. That isn't how people in my world treat each other. It isn't right. But for you - your whole life is one big mess of Kings and Queens," I waved my hand at him, "and Sheriffs. Everyone is used to either being ordered around or giving orders or both." I was pacing the floor now, and I new I was starting cross the line between explanation and rant but I just didn't care. "That isn't how relationships are supposed to work. Not for me, anyway. Ever since I met Bill, I have been pushed into things I wanted no part of. And the kicker to the whole mess, to everything, is that it started on false pretenses. Bill was ordered to find me and seduce me. For political gain! Since that moment I have been manipulated and lied to and coerced in one way or another more times than I can count. God gave me_ free will_ for a reason. I hate seeing it being taken away piece by piece. And now I'm being pulled around again because of this blood tie. It's not fair!"

Well, there. I said it. And if I sounded like a petulant two year old I guess I just didn't care.

I risked a glance at Eric. He was looking at me intently. "Is that what you think is happening here? You think I'm forcing you to do something through our bond?"

"No, I don't think that," I answered slowly, choosing my words carefully. "Not exactly. You aren't doing anything deliberate," Jesus Christ Shepherd of Judea, I hoped not. I couldn't take another blow like that. "But the blood bond makes me feel things that aren't there. Who knows? Maybe I really would care for you even if we hadn't exchanged blood so many times; maybe I would still feel warm and safe and all. But I don't know. As long as this blood tie is here I can't be sure if what I'm feeling is real. And that scares me. I'm surprised it doesn't scare you, too. You like to be in control of things, and this tie is kinda like a curse, like an illusion."

"Sookie my lover, I think you are overestimating the power our bond has on us."

"I think you're underestimating it."

We stared at one another for a long moment. The silence went on long enough that I felt like I should say something but, honestly, I was just plain talked out.

It was Eric that finally broke the silence.

"Am I correct in understanding that you won't acknowledge any feeling you may or may not have for me so long as we are bonded?"

I thought about that quite seriously. Was that what I was saying? Blood bond or not, I had always had a fondness for Eric, and that fondness had grown into deep affection after our nights together. I remembered how it had hurt me when our relationship had changed in the months after the curse was lifted before he regained his memory. I had, quite simply, missed my friend. And what if the bond was always there? Was I really prepared to say that I would never admit affection or love for Eric? No, I knew I wasn't ready to say that.

"I do care for you, Eric," I said softly. "I don't know how much is due to the bond, but it is something I won't deny."

"That is a start," he smiled.

_To be continued_


	2. Chapter 2

Know Thyself

Chapter two

I was starting to relax as I warmed up a blood for Eric in the microwave. I was a little surprised when I asked him (again) if he wanted one and he said 'yes'. After our emotional (on my part) and (as yet) unresolved Talk, I had expected him to leave; to return to Fangtasia and finish up his evening there with Pam and the motley crew of fangbangers that frequented the bar. But he was still camped out on my couch, showing no signs of leaving or of having any awkward discomfort at being here.

The microwave beeped at me and I removed the bottle slowly, my thoughts still spinning. I felt strangely disoriented. I thought I had a pretty good grasp on what I wanted and didn't want in regards to Eric. But seeing him again was churning up feelings I had tried very hard to forget. And it wasn't helping that he wasn't acting like the guarded Eric I had come to know. He was calm, subdued and, dare I say it? Open. It was nice in a way, true, but it was different and it was throwing me off.

I headed back in, found Eric exactly as I left him on the couch. Almost exactly. He had removed his jacket and it was lying neatly across the back of a chair. Glad he was making himself comfortable. He thanked me and patted the seat next to him as I handed him the bottle. After a moment of hesitation I did sit. My suspicion meter was working overtime, as it tended to do whenever Eric was around. I wondered if the reason for his non-departure was because he was still expecting something else to happen here tonight. I wasn't getting that vibe from him right at the moment, but I knew from experience things could go from zero to orgasm pretty darn fast with this particular vamp.

"Why do you work for the shifter, Sookie?" he asked after taking a long drink from the bottle.

The question took me by surprise and I'm sure my face betrayed that. I shifted a bit, trying to get comfortable as I pondered the question, finally choosing to turn to the side and press my back into the corner of the couch. I pulled my feet up and crossed my legs. It was a comfy positions for me, plus it put some room between myself and the big Viking who took up a pretty substantial portion of the couch.

"_Sam_ is a great boss," I told him honestly. "He's also a good friend." And a pretty good kisser, I added _very_ silently to myself.

Eric frowned. "I guess what I meant to ask is why you would choose to work in a bar. With your ability, I would think it would be extraordinarily difficult for you to be surrounded by so many people. There are many professions that would offer you a more relaxing environment."

That stunned me on a few levels. Eric had never really asked me how I felt about my job; he had never really asked me how I felt about anything. Well, except how I felt about him. I remembered quite well the time I had been having a particularly bad night and Eric had bluntly told me he cared nothing of my mood and I figured that summed it up pretty well! So what was he after with this line of questioning? I felt the familiar twist of suspicion start to build, but I pushed it down. I really hated feeling like I had to be on guard all the time. The Christian thing to do, I decided, was to let Eric have the benefit of my doubt. For now.

"I had a few other jobs before Merlotte's," I told him, trying to sound casual. He was looking at me intently, like he was quite serious in wanting to hear my answer. "But I actually really like working there. I mean, yeah, it gets old sometimes; hearing what everyone is thinking. But I have gotten used to it over the years. I can tune it out when I need to, when it gets to be too much. I guess I'm lucky 'cause most people here are pretty decent. Some of them have some pretty scary thoughts, but I've heard lots worse." I thought about my first night at Fangtasia. Every thought was nothing but sex sex sex.

Eric looked thoughtful. He took another drink. "What were you planning to do tonight before I so rudely interrupted your evening." He smiled gently, a nice, normal, non-fang smile that made my heart skip a beat. I found I had to smile back.

"First, maybe your coming by _was_ an interruption, but since you brought that big check from the King it would be pretty ungrateful of me to call you rude, wouldn't it?"

"So what was I interrupting?" he asked.

"I really hadn't made any plans to speak of. I was going to read for a while, I thought about taking a bubble bath and painting my nails. Maybe watch a movie. I dunno, just girl stuff I suppose."

"This is how you usually spend your nights when you are not at work?" He didn't sound accusing or judgmental when he asked, just curious. I filed that away under 'Things that make you say Hmmm' to ponder later.

"I've been working a lot of extra hours lately." I have nothing else to do, I thought to myself, having a brief moment of self pity. "And when I'm home my roommates are almost always here, so tonight is not really a _usual_ night for me." Especially now that Eric was here and I was several - _several_ - thousands of dollars richer!

"Pretend I'm not here," he said, with a little glow in his eyes.

Right. I'll get right on that.

"Excuse me?" I laughed. "I don't think that's possible."

"You mentioned you were going to do that feminine ritual of taking a bubble bath."

Okay, here we go. I knew all this bizarre line of questioning had to be building up to something. Eric and I spent some very enjoyable time in that bathroom. (still numero uno on my list of great showers!) I suspected he was about to offer his, uh, grooming services again and I had a rebuttal poised on my lips when he stood up and walked into kitchen with what was now an empty bottle.

"Take your time, my lover," he called to me from the kitchen. I heard the water start running. Was he rinsing out the bottle? "You have no need to worry, I promise you I will not intrude. Perhaps I will step outside and enjoy the evening air until you are done."

"It's freezing outside!" I protested, not really knowing what else to say.

"Sookie," he said, stepping back into the room, but pausing in the doorway. "I assure you, this weather is nothing compared to what I have lived through. I find the chill quite enjoyable, actually. Now, _scoot _please_. _Enjoy yourself." He raised a hand and motioned towards the hall leading to the bathroom.

I sat there with my mouth hanging open for at least ten seconds. Eric watched me with an amused expression. Why did I feel compelled to do as Eric suggested? Did I believe him when he said he wouldn't walk in on me? I stood up slowly. A bath really did sound good, I had to admit. I had spent a large part of the day cleaning and doing laundry and I felt a little musty. And, I decided, if he broke his promise I could always rescind his invitation. And I would, too. I think. Yes, I would definitely kick him out. Maybe.

"Okay," I said slowly, still feeling more than a bit hesitant. "Feel free to warm up another drink if you want. And you can watch some T.V. or do whatever." Eloquent. I could have smacked myself.

Eric didn't move from the doorway as I turned and started down the hall. I glanced at the fire on the way out and saw it was flagging a bit. I made a mental note to put another log on when I was through with my bath. I made a stop in my bedroom first to grab some fresh clothes. I decided since it was getting late and I was going to get cleaned up, I might as well just put on pajamas. I grabbed some new undies and then chose a _very_ modest two piece flannel pajama set with long pants and a long sleeved shirt that buttoned up the front. It was bright blue and had little snowflake designs all over it. Eric would probably like that. I hesitated. Did I really just think that? I shook my head. Whatever.

I grabbed a towel and shut and locked the door to the bathroom. I decided to forgo the full bubble bath and just take a shower. I soaped up with some lilac scented body wash, the good kind I really liked but rarely splurged on; then I ran a razor over my legs and under my arms. The hot water beating down on my back was loosening all the knots and tension that had been forming during the evening. I tried to concentrate on relaxing, so that meant not going over and over all the things that Eric and I had said and done tonight. There was plenty to think about, no doubt there, but I decided I would think about that tomorrow. I smiled. Thank you Scarlet O' Hara!

I found myself peeking around the curtain every so often as I lathered up and washed my hair, half expecting to see Eric sliding into the room. He never did. I found myself disappointed. Bah! What was I wanting here? Was I really hoping Eric would break or ignore his promise to me? What was _that_ about? I had a pang of nostalgia and longing as I dried off with one of my white fluffy towels. Was this the same towel Eric had used to dry me after our infamous shower scene? Was it the one I used on him? I squeezed my eyes shut. What was I doing? If I let myself think about those things for too long I might convince myself that walking out into the other room and jumping Eric was a pretty good idea. But then I would be in for a world of trouble. Eric would probably assume I was giving myself to him, to be 'his.' I would have an even harder time trying to break through the mysterious spell of our blood bond. Sex with Eric, as perfect and amazing as it would no doubt be, was just not in my best interests right now. I had to get a grip on myself. I needed to figure out where my feelings began and ended and where his started, and vice versa. Right now this blood tie was getting everything mixed up and our emotions were weaving together in a way that was driving me insane.

I got dressed, brushed out my hair but didn't dry it, brushed my teeth and opened the little door under the sink where I kept my basket of nail polish and manicure supplies. I unlocked the door and tred barefoot down the hall as quietly as I could. I could feel Eric (joy joy) so I knew he was in the house. I entered the living room to find the fire raging again (he had apparently put on another log) and the vampire himself was standing over my small assortment of books and movies. He was picking through the selection, looking at the covers curiously, flipping a book over from time to time to read the back cover. I felt my face redden. I knew I had a lot of romance novels over there and some of the covers didn't leave much to the imagination as to what the book was about. What can I say? I might be a telepath with an assortment of supernatural buddies but I'm still a girl. I walked closer, still clutching my little basket of nail supplies. I choked back a giggle as Eric picked up a book, one of my few in hard back, and furrowed his brow in confusion. He looked at me curiously.

"You read some very interesting things," he said with some amusement. He held up the book in his hand. "What is this one about?"

I'm sure my face was pink as I answered. "That is actually about a teenage girl that falls in love with a classmate who turns out to be a vampire."

Eric chuckled, a deep rumbly sound as he scanned the back cover. Vampire stories and movies and reality shows were all the rage now, as he was no doubt aware.

He glanced again at the front cover then slid the book back into it's proper place. "I thought it might have been about a seller of fruit."

He turned to me. His face was pink and full; he had probably helped himself to another bottle of blood while I showered. He stepped closer to me and his nostrils flared. He bent his head slightly, then shut his eyes. "Lilac," he whispered.

"Is that bad?" I asked.

"Your own scent is much more enjoyable, but it's pleasant."

Not sure what to say about that I nodded to the selection of movies. "Want to watch something?"

"What would you have chosen to watch this evening?" he asked me, stepping aside. I almost answered honestly - I did in fact have a small group of so-called 'chick flicks' that I watched on my 'me' nights. But I reigned myself in from answering. This was getting to be too much. One, Eric was really starting to spook me with all this unselfishness. And I was also feeling like the world's worst hostess. I was a properly raised, good southern girl. One did not leave guests to wander the house and get their own drinks while the hostess was off taking a shower and padding around the house in her pj's. And now I was about to choose a very girly movie, too? I very much doubted Eric the vampire boss would enjoy Steel Magnolias or Bridget Jones Diary. Maybe I hadn't asked him to come over, but I _had_ invited him in and that put him squarely under my hospitality. My Grandmother would have rapped my hand with a wooden spoon for my behavior!

"No way," I said strongly. "You pick something. I insist." I turned on my heel and plopped down on the carpet in front of the fire with my little basket of nail supplies. The heat from the fire would help dry both my hair and the polish. I pointedly ignored Eric while I took a little pad and dabbed it with some nail polish remover and started rubbing my toenails one by one. The existing polish was chipped and faded. I hoped Eric hadn't been paying too much attention to my feet!

"Where is that movie you told me I should watch?" He asked suddenly. He had his back to me and was bent over, hands on his knees looking at movie titles. Lord have mercy, the _view_!

"Huh? What movie?" I'm sure I sounded a little rattled.

"Something about wind, I believe."

My eyes went wide. "Gone with the Wind?" I laughed out loud. Yes, I did once say something to Eric about him having to see that movie. I had a big stake jabbed in my side and had been loaded down with pain killers at the time, though. Did he really remember that?

"Ah," he said, apparently finding it. It was an old copy on a double VHS tape set. He looked at the box and his eyes narrowed.

"Eric," I said slowly "That's kind of a long movie."

"Are you wanting to go to bed? Or am I..." He paused a moment and seemed to be searching for the right words. "Wearing out my welcome?"

"No, not at all!" I answered immediately and was a little surprised that I really meant it. Eric's presence wasn't wearing on me at all. Quite the opposite, I was actually enjoying his company now that we were apparently past the heavy chit-chat and sexual overtures. "But I thought you would be wanting to go soon, you know, keeping ahead of Victor and all."

He smiled. "Pam knows how to reach me if there is a need. She is quite able to keep an eye on things in my absence, as she has proven before."

Yeah, before when her boss was cursed and having wild sexual escapades off in Bon Temps with a barmaid.

"OK then. I'm warning you, it might be a little, well, not boring - at least not to me - but it's not really much of an action film." I had a feeling Eric was more of a blood and guts movie kind of vamp, but he just nodded and started up the first tape. After adjusting the sound to a good level for both watching and talking he came over and sat down in front of the fire with me. He sat with his long legs stretched out in front of him, leaning back on his arms. He wasn't uncomfortably close to me and I realized with some shock that his proximity, which sometimes made my nervous, was actually soothing. I sighed. Oh, thank you almighty blood bond! _Not!_

And there we sat, me playing pedicure with Eric hunkered down beside me watching Gone with the Wind. In the past few years I had come to know about vampires, werewolves, shape shifters, fairies and even other realms of existence. But somehow tonight seemed more crazy than any of it.

_To be continued_

(I know this was short and all fluff! Sorry, just couldn't help myself!)


	3. Chapter 3

**Know Thyself**

**Chapter Three**

About half an hour had passed quickly and uneventfully. Eric seemed to be genuinely fascinated by the staple of southern culture we were watching. He laughed easily and loudly at points (some things he laughed at weren't really intended to be funny) His laughter warmed me. Eric had such a vibrant way about him. He never seemed to do anything half-way. He laughed, flirted, fought and made love with everything he had. I liked that about him and, I made a mental note to myself, that was something I had _always_ liked about him. Ha! Get thee behind me, evil blood bond! This one is all mine.

My toenails were painted and were slowly drying. (Eric had picked out the color for me. He had chosen a deep red. (Surprise Surprise!) I was starting to feel the heavy chip on my shoulder diminish as the night wore on. I had to admit I was having a good time with my...well, whatever Eric was to me now. He was a friend, but more than a friend. A former lover but not really because we still had some pretty intense physical moments together even if they didn't always lead to the bedroom. He wasn't a boyfriend, or an ex, like Bill. He was just Eric. I told myself some relationships didn't need to be categorized, just appreciated for what they were.

I felt my hair, it was getting pretty dry. I would need to brush it out again so it wouldn't tangle up. I rose up to grab the brush from the bathroom. Eric watched me. "Be right back," I told him and hurried down the hall, walking a little awkwardly on my heels as I tried not to smudge my new toenail polish since it hadn't set yet. I was back quickly. I sat down carefully, again mindful of the tootsies. I started to run the brush through my hair and noticed Eric was still watching me.

"Bill used to do that for you," he said quietly.

I paused mid stroke. How did he...? Oh, I remembered. He was there one night when Bill helped me with my hair. I felt a wave of anguish. That was the night I had ordered both Bill and Eric out of my house, the night my relationship with Bill had really, truly ended. Thanks for bringing it up Eric, I thought irritably. While you're at it, maybe you can pull off one of my fingernails, too.

"I'm sorry," he told me. Whether he felt my sudden mood change through the bond thing or just saw it on my face I wasn't sure. Maybe both. "I should not have said that." He sounded quite sincere. I was really a tad stunned he had mentioned Bill at all. He had made it clear on more than one occasion that he was quite content with the dissolution of my relationship with the younger vampire.

"It's okay," I told him after a short pause. I hoped my voice didn't sound as sullen as I felt. I didn't meet his eyes. "Bill and I have been broken up for a long time. It actually makes me angry that it still hurts sometimes."

Eric looked away without comment. I started brushing my hair again. We sat in silence for a bit, just watching the movie.

"Do you not trust me, Sookie?" he asked suddenly after about ten minutes. I glanced up and found his blue eyes boring into me. He shifted his position, bringing one leg up and leaning forward to rest his forearm on his knee. Darn, but if he wasn't one good looking vamp! I couldn't help but notice how the firelight played on his pale skin and hair. I stopped the thought in it's tracks. I was wandering again, wasn't I? Yeah, I really was. Stay on target, I told myself firmly. What was the question again?

"I trust you," I said slowly. It wasn't_ exactly_ the whole truth, of course. I trusted Eric as much as was possible, what with him being a vampire and all. But, now that he had openly declared his intentions for me in such a direct fashion, I was even more wary. Eric was nothing if not determined and I wasn't sure to what lengths he was willing to go to achieve his goal.

"I think that perhaps Bill's deception has tainted your opinion of vampires. Of males." He shrugged. "Of me."

I felt rocky seas ahead. I really, _really_ wasn't wanting to tred back into a deep conversation with Eric. But the way he said it, with a strange mix of anger and sadness, I didn't feel as though I could dismiss him.

I had to admit that my relationship with Bill had taken away my innocence (in more than one way) I wasn't sure I was ever going to be able to look at someone again and feel like I really, truly knew them. I thought I knew Bill. I thought I knew why he had moved to Bon Temps and I thought I knew how he felt about me. Wrong, wrong and wrong again! I knew it was a sinful act to cast judgment on one for the wrongs of another; I had heard that in church from before I could even understand the words. But was that really what I was doing? Or was I just a wiser person now?

"I don't think it has anything to do with Bill," I told him, hoping it was the truth. "He was my first boyfriend." I rolled me eyes. "You know what I mean." It sounded ridiculous calling a civil war veteran 'boyfriend' but that was the best title I could come up with for Bill.

"I have always been honest with you, you know," Eric stated, his tone lighter. He looked back at the movie. I puffed out a short, barking kind of laugh. He was kidding, right? He looked at me with raised eyebrows.

"You've always been honest with me?" I repeated his words back to him, smiling a bit at his affronted expression. "I will remind you of this conversation the next time you absolutely need me to suck a bullet out of your arm!" I really couldn't bring myself to be angry with him about that even if if was a big, fat lie. The fact was he did take a bullet that would have certainly hit me. Okay, he had taken quite a few bullets for me. But only the first one did he _need_ me to suck out; the others all popped out quite nicely all on their own, thank you very much. I wasn't trying to start an argument, really, but I did get a moment of satisfaction when he realized I was calling him out on his bullshit. He kind of bobbed his head and even had the decency to look a little embarrassed. Very little.

"I did do that, didn't I?" he asked softly.

"MmmmHmmm"

"I found you interesting," he explained. At least he wasn't going to try to deny it. "I wanted to know you better."

"You wanted to get your blood in me and you wanted to get me in bed." I looked him right in the eye. He looked right back.

"That, too." His eyes sparked and he gave me a lopsided Eric-y grin. "But a bed would have been optional. Any surface would have sufficed." He glanced around the room "Kitchen table for instance, fireplace rug, front porch..." He let his voice trail off, turned back to look at me and winked. I turned away so he couldn't see me smile. He never, ever gave up. I found my mood suddenly lifted, and the slight tension that had been mounting the past few minutes seemed to fizzle away.

I shook my head and made a supreme effort to pay attention to the TV screen. I knew this movie forward and backward; I could probably say every single line right along with Scarlet and Rhett and Melanie. I wondered what Eric was thinking. I risked a glance in his direction. He seemed involved in the story; if he was faking interest he was doing a darn good job at it. I filed that information away in the 'brownie points for Eric' section of my brain. Hard for a born and raised southern gal not to like a man - or vampire - who appreciates Gone with the Wind! Maybe next I'd dig out a copy of _Old Yeller_ and see if he cries.

As I watched Scarlet in her beautiful dresses doing what she did best, my mind drifted and wandered. My toes were definitely dry now so I tucked my feet up under me and sat crossed legged. I started in on my fingernails, filing them slowly one by one. A thought popped into my head and I suddenly thought about Pam. She grew up near the time of the Civil War, even though she lived in England. She told me about her layers of clothes, her hair, even the underwear she wore back then while she was still human. I wondered if her life had been anything like what I was watching. I said as much out loud and Eric gave me a long and unreadable look.

"What?" I asked him.

"Nothing," he said, turning away from my gaze. It was most certainly _not _nothing, though. I felt suddenly angry, but I knew it was just some spillover coming through from Eric. I cursed the bond again. I was sitting here all relaxed and doing my nails and thinking trivial but pleasant thoughts and then Bam! I feel angry for no reason at all. And there was nothing I could do to stop it and I couldn't shut it off. And knowing it wasn't _my_ anger didn't make it feel any less real. I was tempted to let it go, but maybe it was the warmth of the fire, or the friendly-type feelings Eric and I were suddenly sharing but I found myself honestly interested in what was on his mind. If I had upset him in some way it sure hadn't been my intent. I wanted to make it right, if I could. And, most of all, if he was happy then I would be, too. Jesus save me, how twisted was that?

"Did I do something?" I asked him. I knew I sounded irritable. Well, now I _felt_ irritable. Blood Bond strikes again! "You're angry." It wasn't a question and he knew it. He glanced at me then looked ahead.

"You told Pam you thought I killed her," he answered after a moment. His voice was flat, unemotional.

This angered him? I should have known he would have insisted (demanded) that Pam tell him everything she and I talked about that night she came to visit me at Merlottes. And I should have known Pam would tell him; of course she would. Or maybe he had simply overheard our whole conversation. Who knows? Well, it wasn't a big deal, at least not to me. She told me a little about her human life, about how Eric turned her. And yes, I did point out that Eric had in fact _killed_ her. She didn't seem to mind that one little bit.

"Didn't you?" I asked him directly. "She is dead, correct?"

"I took one life and gave her another." He said it simply, still staring straight ahead.

"I guess that's one way of looking at it," I said quietly, not sounding the least bit convinced.

"You think I was wrong." Now it was his turn to _not_ ask a question.

I grimaced inwardly. Pam loved being a vampire; she told me so herself. It was easy to say killing an innocent person is wrong, but if that person wanted to die...? If that person was truly happier dead, was it still wrong? Was it less wrong? A different wrong? Well, now we were getting into some heavy gray areas and I wasn't about to pretend I was smart enough to sort it all out.

"I don't know, Eric." And that was certainly the truth. "Pam told me she's very happy. And she cares for you very much." I don't know why I felt the need to add that last little nugget, but I did.

Some of the vicarious anger I had been feeling started to melt away. Eric looked at me and gave a little nod to the screen. "Pam was a lot like this Scarlet," he said with just the barest hint of a smile. I'm sure I looked taken aback, because I was. Eric was sharing. Again. Wow, was that one of the neighbor's pigs that just flew past the window? I blinked.

"She was beautiful, of course," Eric went on, his voice full of affection. "But that wasn't why I chose her." He stopped suddenly and looked at me. I think he was making sure this was something I wanted to hear. It was. I nodded at him to continue.

"I had been on my own for quite some time. I had already decided to create a child, a companion for myself, when I first saw her. I watched her for many nights before I was sure she was the right one. She came from a wealthy family with servants, maids, tutors. She was educated, for a woman." His voice soured a bit. "She had been groomed from birth to be part of the 'society' crowd, as it was called." He paused, his lips turned up into a small grin. "She had many suitors." He stopped, his eyes focused on something far, far away for a moment. He looked at me. I'm sure my eyes were round as saucers. I was speechless, as much from Eric's sudden openness as from the tale. I was utterly fascinated.

"It didn't take long at all for me to see she felt stifled in her role. I had observed humanity for a very long time. Pam wasn't cut out for the life they were trying to force upon her. She told you about the boy?"

"The boy she had run off to meet the night you..." I didn't finish. I didn't have to. Eric nodded.

"He was nothing to her, that much was clear to me. She wasn't running to him so much as she was running away from her future. She was a rare woman for her time. She had courage and spirit. I waited for her that last night." He paused a moment. "I glamoured her before I took her. She felt no pain."

And that, as they say, was that.

I felt like I should be repulsed by what he just told me. I should feel righteous anger, shouldn't I? Eric had just admitted pre-meditated murder. This wasn't just an impulsive act borne of loneliness, as Pam had thought. Eric had chose her, stalked her and took her life. But I just couldn't muster up the least bit of rage or contempt. Whatever I was feeling about Eric's decision to take Pam's life, it was a shadow of what I was feeling about his willingness to share this piece of information with me. He knew I thought he was a killer and that angered him, though I wasn't really sure why. (he had called himself such before.) He could easily have just ignored or dismissed my view but he didn't. He _explained_ to me why he chose Pam, why he turned her, even though I hadn't asked. He knew there was a chance I might be repulsed when he told me, that I would pull farther away from him and that would have been the exact _opposite _of what he was wanting from me. He had allowed himself to be in a position of vulnerability with me, at least on an emotional level. I felt like a big strobe light was flashing in my head. This was _huge_.

With a start, I realized he was waiting for me - waiting to see how I would receive this token he had given me, this piece of himself. He wasn't holding his breath, because he didn't breathe. But he was doing the vampire equivalent, I was sure.

I looked him full in the face and smiled. "Thank you for telling me."

He looked pleased at my reaction. "You don't find me monstrous?"

I rolled my eyes. "No more than always" I mumbled, turning back to work on my nails. I knew he heard me. I tried quite unsuccessfully to hide a grin.

There was a brief pause but then Eric burst out in rolling laughter. He stood up, stretching his long body. From my position on the floor he looked absolutely huge as I peered up at him. Was he leaving? I glanced at the clock. It was getting late but not terribly so. I felt a pang of sadness. I would miss him when he left, I realized.

"You mind if I have another drink?" he asked me. I felt my face flash with pleasure when I understood he wasn't getting up to leave. Did he notice my reaction? I hoped not. But I'd bet he had.

I pushed myself up. "I'll get it for you. I'm not being a very good hostess if _you_ have to ask _me _for a refill."

I was no sooner on my feet than two strong arms caught me around the waist and spun me around. I looked up into Eric's eyes; they bored into me and his hands moved to cup my face, tilting it up. He moved very close. "I don't want you as my hostess." His voice was husky. I found my own arms linked around his neck before I even realized what I was doing. In the next moment we were sharing a long, deep and very intense kiss. In a heartbeat, every nerve in my body lit up and I felt myself melting into him. For a few moments I forgot about my stoic determination to fight back against the false emotions the blood bond created between us. I allowed myself to enjoy the warmth, the feeling of closeness. It seemed much too soon when Eric slowly and gently drew himself away from me. I couldn't take my eyes off his face. The air around us was flickering and humming with electricity. A small portion of my brain registered dead silence around us.

"The tape needs to be changed," I said softy. My voice sounded strange. As if on cue the tape in my old VCR popped out with a groaning protest from the eject mechanisms. Eric stepped back, putting some space between us. After taking a moment to make sure my legs had stopped shaking I walked over and knelt in front of the television. I pulled out tape one of Gone with the Wind, popped in tape two and hit play. Eric's presence was very strong just behind me.

Without warning my own body decided to embarrass me by letting out a little rumble deep inside. I shut my eyes, hoping beyond hope that Eric hadn't caught that.

He had, of course. Vampire hearing for the win!

"I've kept you from dinner," he stated, sounding concerned. I stood up, shaking my head.

"No you didn't. I ate earlier. Probably just snack time." I shrugged. I had some fresh fruit in the refrigerator I could grab, but right now I needed something else. "I'll be right back."

I turned away and walked down the hall to the bathroom. Nature's call wasn't urgent but I needed a moment to regroup anyway. I found myself pushing my hair back with my fingers again and again. What was happening to me? I finished up, washed my hands in the sink and took a quick check in the mirror. I gasped when I saw my reflection. I looked pretty, I noticed pleasantly. The warmth from the fire - or perhaps from Eric's kissing expertise - had infused my skin with a pink glow and my eyes were clear and bright. I looked rosy and healthy. And very happy.

Uh oh.

Admittedly, there was something different about Eric tonight. And I don't mean in a bad way. It was nearly like I had Cursed Eric with me again, the way we were sitting around laughing and talking. But in another way he was still the Normal Eric, the one with many lifetimes of memories, the one that remembered all his power and control and who knew he was too sexy for his shirt. But Normal Eric wouldn't ever have considered giving up any part of that control, especially not to a human woman. And Cursed Eric had the luxury of not even knowing what it was he was giving up so it had been easy for him to offer it freely. Nope. What I had on my hands right now was a different Eric altogether; some bizarre hybrid between Eric the Cursed and Eric the Normal.

Maybe this could be....

I could barely bring myself to even acknowledge the words that popped into my head.

_My Eric._

Whoa.

I shook my head, gathered myself and opened the door. I walked back down the hall and saw part II of Gone with the Wind had already started. I heard the microwave beep from the kitchen and a moment later Eric strode back in with a bottle of blood in one hand and a little bowl of grapes in the other. He handed me the bowl with a smile. I managed a small 'thank you' and watched as Eric lowered himself back onto the rug in front of the fire. He looked up at me expectantly, then turned back to the TV.

"What did I miss?" he asked, taking a big drink of blood and licking his lips.

I parked myself beside him in something of a daze. I looked down at the little bowl in my hands and popped a grape into my mouth.

Whoever this Eric was, I found I was really, really starting to like him.

_To be continued_


	4. Chapter 4

Know Thyself

Chapter Four

I found that watching Eric's reactions to Gone with the Wind was almost as entertaining as the movie itself. He was soaking it up like a sponge, tossing out questions here and there and listening intently to my answers. Not at all to my surprise he liked Rhett Butler, the bold and dashing rogue of a hero. We had settled into an easy banter void of expectation and innuendo and I was enjoying myself more than I would have thought was possible. A few times I even found myself reaching out and touching Eric's arm or hand as we talked and laughed, such was the aire of companionship that was forming between us.

After my little epiphany concerning Eric's sudden change in behavior towards me (the words 'my Eric my Eric my Eric' was still pounding through my head like drums of battle) I had decided to just let things roll for a bit and see what happened. I mean, people _can_ change, right? (people in this case meaning vampires, of course) Every day people do extraordinary things for often times unfathomable reasons; they start working out, they leave bad relationships or stop smoking. What kind of cynical person would I be if I dismissed Eric outright? And there was the little part of my heart that reminded me that I did have a very real affection (and attraction) for Eric. My brain however- the rational part of me, I suspected - told me I was being a complete idiot and needed to stop daydreaming. The trump card in the whole tangled mess was that Eric was a Vampire with layers upon layers of motivations that were completely foreign to me.

Right now I was happy to set aside all those considerations - both the good and the bad - and just enjoy the evening with a gorgeous male who had known me inside and out, saved my life on countless occasions and who really seemed to 'get me'. Maybe I was lost in in lala land, but hey, everyone enjoys a trip once in a while.

It was only about twenty minutes into tape two when a reality check landed smack on top of our evening in the form of a phone vibrating in Eric's pocket. He pulled it out in one of those vampiric quick motions that was almost too fast for me to see. He glanced and the number and stood up swiftly, then looked back down at me where I was still sitting on the floor in front of the fire. He had an almost apologetic expression; I'm sure he remembered my earlier jab about his always being stuck to his phone with his peeps.

"I have to take this call," he told me. "Shouldn't be long."

I nodded and stood up myself, stretching my legs. I tried not to be irritated about the phone thing. Eric was what he was, after all: Sheriff of Area five. I'd never specifically asked, but from what I knew about vamps in general they were always more or less on-call to those above them in their odd hierarchy. I wondered absently if Eric ever got vacation days.

My little bowl of grapes was empty (I guess I was hungrier than I thought) and I carried it with me as I walked over to the VCR and hit the pause button. Eric had flipped open his phone and walked about halfway down the hall. I wasn't sure if he was wanting privacy for the call or if he was trying to escape the distraction of the TV. With his ridiculously good hearing I suspected it was more of a privacy thing. Vampires and secrecy went together like peas and carrots! I smiled to myself. Forrest Gump was one of my favorite movies.

I felt awkward just standing there trying not to listen in on Eric's call so I headed into the kitchen and rinsed out the bowl, leaving it in the sink to wash later. I turned and leaned against the counter for a few minutes to collect my thoughts. One of the last scenes we watched was when Scarlet shot and killed a Yankee soldier that had broken into her home. It hit the mark a little too closely for me, with the fast approaching anniversary of the night I had shot and killed an intruder of my own. Of course I hadn't had a choice, and I would most certainly be dead now at the hands of Debbie Pelt if not for Eric and his uncanny ability to shield me from flying bullets.

I shook myself out of my reverie and headed back to the other room. Eric, still engaged on his call, was leaning back against the wall in the darkened hallway, head tilted down speaking quietly into the phone. His strong form was in silhouette from the lights in the living room and I took a moment to just enjoy the view, letting my eyes drift, admiring his broad chest and strong arms, long legs. I found my gaze lingering a bit at areas south of Eric's face. Definite eye candy, I was thinking to myself as a warm rush of lusty thoughts popped into my head. Was it getting hotter in here or what? With some effort I pulled my eyes back up and had a definite Oh Shit Moment when I saw Eric was looking me dead in the face, a little smirk on his lips. Oh, _hell_. Busted! I felt color flood into my face. But then Eric, never removing the phone from his ear and never missing a beat in his conversation, pushed himself away from the wall, tossed his head back, shaking his hair around like Fabio in a shampoo commercial. He turned his back to me, striking a very male-model-like pose with one hip cocked to the side and his free hand reaching back to rest lightly on that award winning butt he knew I liked so much. He turned his head and looked at me over his shoulder, cocking an eyebrow and giving me a look that was pure sex. He topped it off with a wink and a grin and then resumed his previous position leaning back against the wall.

I couldn't _not_ laugh, and once I started I had to turn around and put my hand over my mouth to stifle the giggles out of respect for the person on the other end of the phone, whoever that might be. I shook my head. Eric was a crack-up, yes indeed.

I was still grinning when I picked up the poker and stabbed a bit at the fire just to occupy my hands while I waited for Eric to finish up with his vamp business. I had already put on the last log but there were more stacked up outside near the porch. Since I had a few minutes, I figured I might as well stock up. I bent over and grabbed up the heavy work gloves I kept near the fireplace, the ones I used to carry logs from outside. I pulled on an old work jacket that was hanging on the coat rack near the door and glanced at Eric, pointing at the empty log rack to let him know where I was going. He nodded at me, raising one finger to let me know he would only be a little longer. I stepped into a pair of neon green plastic slip-on shoes I kept near the door for yard work and headed outside.

The chill hit me pretty hard. I shivered, seeing my breath in the air. Maybe snow really was on the way. I had gathered up 4 small logs and was reaching for a fifth when I heard footfalls on the gravel behind me.

"Sookie," said a cool and familiar voice.

Bill had been being polite by making noise as he approached. He could be swift and silent as can be but he knew I didn't enjoy being surprised, especially at night.

"Bill," I acknowledged him with a small smile. Though our 'friendship' (for lack of a better word) was still strained, it had gotten better over the past few months. It seemed as though time did in fact heal wounds, though I was pretty sure some of the injuries he inflicted on me would forever leave a scar, leave me forever changed. He made it no secret he was ready and willing to resume our previous relationship if I ever wanted to do so. As of right now, I was pretty positive I would never be able to go there again with him.

"I saw your lights on," he said, looking me up and down with a small smile. I knew I must look ridiculous standing out in the night air in blue flannel pajamas, green shoes and a ratty jacket. I didn't care, I certainly wasn't worried about fashion at this point. Bill reached towards me. "Let me help you carry those inside."

I winced inwardly. Bill and Eric together in my house? No, wasn't gonna happen. Not tonight.

"It's okay, I got it," I told him, hoping I didn't sound ungrateful for his offer.

"What are you doing tonight? I saw Amelia and Octavia leave earlier." His tone was light but I could hear the ring of hope in the question; hope that I'd do the polite thing and invite him inside. Again, wasn't gonna happen.

"I'm just watching a movie is all," I told him, which was in fact the truth. Not that I had anything to hide as far as Eric being over. It was really none of Bill's business who I chose to spend my time with, but I didn't want to create unnecessary drama if I could avoid it. Plus I was freezing and really, really wanted to get back inside.

"Would you like company?" he asked quietly.

I was trying to find a politically correct way to disengage from this mess when Bill's expression suddenly changed. One second he was looking at me and then his eyes grew cold and raised to peer over my head. I didn't have to turn around to know Eric had made his presence known. Wonderful.

"She has company," Eric's voice, sounding deeper than usual, came from behind me.

The two Vampires acknowledged each other with a polite if not a little bit perfunctory greeting. I decided the situation was well on it's way to getting uncomfortable and I was still freezing so I took this as my cue to bail. I looked at Bill. He was absolutely white and very still.

"Eric stopped by tonight to drop off something from the King, and..."

"Of course," Bill interrupted me, straightening his back. "I'm very sorry to intrude." For just a flash of a second I thought I saw pain in his eyes, but then it was gone. Bill was very good at keeping his thoughts from showing on his face. (Too good, I thought miserably.) I figured he would leave then, but instead he stepped in very close to me, touching my arm with one cool hand. He looked me in the eye and whispered so low I could barely hear him. "Please be cautious. If you need me, I won't be far." Then he took two steps back, looked back up at Eric, inclined his head formally and disappeared into the darkness.

What was that all about? Be cautious? Of what, I wondered. Of Eric? Wow. This from the very vampire that told me on more than one occasion that if anything were to happen to him, I should go to Eric and place myself under his protection.

I shook my head. It was too darn cold to stand outside and worry about what Bill may or may not be thinking. I turned and almost ran back to the house. Eric was holding the door open for me and as I stepped inside he immediately took the bundle of logs from my arms and piled them neatly in the rack. I slipped off the shoes and gloves and Eric assisted me with my coat. (Not that I needed assistance but it was a nice gesture) I went over to fire and held out my hands appreciating the warmth. Eric stood behind me and rubbed his hands up and down my arms. It felt good.

"I would have gotten that for you," he told me.

"Thanks, but it was just something to do. I was trying to be polite and let you finish your conversation without an audience." I paused, trying to decide if I should ask my next question. Normally I didn't ask much of Eric about vamp dealings, mainly because he didn't offer much and most times I didn't really want to know any more about vampire stuff than I had to. But, I reminded myself, this was a different Eric - or so it seemed. I decided yes, go for it. "Nothing is wrong, I hope?" Okay, I guess it wasn't exactly a question but to my surprise Eric answered me immediately.

"I don't believe so," he stated. He was still rubbing my arms but the movement had slowed somewhat. It still felt good. "We have a phone chain, all the area Sheriffs. We call one another nightly to check in and exchange necessary information. The chain isn't to be broken, especially now when things are still so...tenuous."

I nodded. Bill explained some of this to me the night of the Nevada takeover.

"You really don't get much time to yourself, do you?" I asked softly, voicing my earlier thoughts.

Eric considered. "It's better, now, since I have Pam with me. Before I opened Fangtasia I was running the area alone and there was no one I could fully trust to handle my affairs."

"You could have made her come help you before, couldn't you? I mean, since you're her maker she has to do what you say, correct?"

Eric's hands went suddenly still though he didn't move them from my arms. I cringed inside. I wondered if I had finally overstepped the bounds in this whole give-and-take thing we seemed to have going. I turned to him, raising a hand.

"Sorry, that's really none of my business," I told him.

There was a substantial pause and Eric regarded me. He appeared to be making a decision. He shook his head.

"There are some Vampires that regard their children as property but I am not one of them. Pam is free to go her own way at any time, though I think she is content here. She is part owner of Fangtasia and several other lucrative business interests."

Eric's tone had a distinct and almost defensive edge. I had a feeling there was more to it than he was letting on. And he had dropped his contractions, usually a sign he was being very careful. I hoped I hadn't offended him.

"She told me she was happy when you called her to work for you. And I've heard you have a reputation as a decent boss."

Eric's brow raised. "You've been asking about me?" There was a slight smile now.

"No. That information was volunteered. I also heard you're no softy. That part was soooo hard for me to believe." I smirked at him and he laughed out loud. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me close. I didn't resist. I mimicked the gesture, reaching around him and then laying my head on his silent chest. I closed my eyes enjoying the way he smelled, the way he made me feel small as I was enveloped by his massive frame. He bent his head and I felt his cheek caress my hair.

"Who told you I wasn't soft?" he asked suddenly, a tease in his voice. "Not that I'm disagreeing, of course."

I stayed right where I was in his embrace when I answered. I had absolutely no desire to move.

"Felicia. She came into Merlottes one night as a joke. Well, it was Pam's joke. Pam told her she had to beg me for mercy so she wouldn't end up dead like the other bartenders at Fangtasia."

Eric chuckled. I liked the way the sound made his chest vibrate. He raised one hand to stroke my hair. It was sheer bliss. I sighed.

"And did you grant her your mercy, my most dangerous lover?"

"I shook my head against his chest. "I told her Pam was playing a game with us. I told her none of those deaths were my fault."

"Ah, but that is not entirely accurate is it?" Eric pushed me away and looked into my face. He was radiant. I was ridiculously happy which probably meant he was, too. It took me a moment to gather enough sense to fully register what he was saying and when I did I felt a little pang of hurt.

"Well, I was there when they all died, but I hardly think I had any control over it!" I mustered up as much indignation as I could, and right then that wasn't a whole lot at all.

Eric traced the line of my face with a finger. "Do you remember what I told you about Longshadow's maker?"

Huh? I had to think about that one. Hot Rain was his name, yes I remembered now. And he had sent one of his minions, Charles, to find me and kill me, as retribution against Eric for killing his child.

"I remember," I said slowly. "But it still wasn't my fault Charles died. He was hired to kill me. To get back at you, I might add!"

Eric looked at me with warmth in his eyes. "Yes, because he knew your death would hurt me as no other. Hot Rain had such affection for his child. They had an intimacy that went beyond the physical. He heard, and I don't know how, that I had that same connection with you. That was before our blood bonding in Rhodes, you realize?"

I actually shuddered when he spoke the words. There was no doubt Eric noticed my reaction; his eyes were practically blazing with triumph. I knew what he was getting at with this conversation.

"Still not my fault," I said very quietly, side-stepping the obvious implications. I managed a small smile. "Maybe it would be safer if you kept your affections to yourself."

"Oh, I have tried."

I wasn't sure I could speak even if I had some way to reply to that. My heart was pounding and I knew Eric could hear every beat. We stood there together, just looking at one another, for I don't know how long.

"I want you to ask me, lover" he said at last. The words came out clear and strong though he was speaking barely above a whisper.

Somehow I managed to find my voice. "Ask you what?" I sounded more than a tad shaky.

Eric smiled down at me and stepped in close once again, his hands touching my sides just above my waist. "I'm not going to seduce you. I'm not going to attempt to convince you of what you want or what you feel. You are your own, Sookie; you have made that very clear many times. If you decide you want me, all you have to do is ask."

With that, he kissed my forehead, turned and walked across the room to the VCR. He hit play and Gone with the Wind started up again while I stood shock still and utterly bowled over with a plethora of emotions. He sat on the couch, leaning back against the cushy arm. He tossed one leg up onto the cushions and made a beckoning movement with his hand towards me. Without conscious thought, like I wasn't even in control, my body moved itself forward and I sat down on the couch in front of him, pulling my legs up toward my chest. Eric's arm circled me and I leaned back against him, melting into his embrace. His free hand idly stroked my forearm and I found it extraordinarily soothing.

For someone who was allegedly not trying to seduce me, he was doing a pretty good job of accomplishing just that.

_**To be continued**_


	5. Chapter 5

Know Thyself

Chapter Five

We were about halfway through tape two when I felt my mood begin to spiral downhill. It had nothing to do with my company, who was on his best behavior, or my current position, which was curled up into the arms of said company.

"You're upset."

I closed my eyes. Thanks Eric, for reminding me about our bond. As if I could forget. Oh, yes. I was getting irritable, most assuredly.

"I don't like the end of this movie," I answered honestly, trying hard to keep my voice light.

"Why?"

I shrugged. "It's not a happy ending. Scarlet...well, I don't want to give it away, but she destroys her own happiness. She really screws up." As much as I enjoyed Gone with the Wind, the last hour or so always got to me. Scarlet has her head so far up Ashley's butt she never could see how much she really loved Rhett until it was too late and he leaves her. Plus Melanie and poor little Bonnie die. Even the stupid pony gets shot. Depressing. Every gal has a movie that makes her cry no matter how many times she watches it and Gone with the Wind was one of mine.

"Would you rather not watch any more?" Eric sat up a little and I took the opportunity to reposition myself, but only slightly. I was content as could be sitting as I was, leaned up against Eric's chest on the couch. It felt nice to be held.

"No, it's okay. I've seen it a hundred times. I think I will go grab a drink, though. Want one?"

"Thank you, but I'm fine. For now."

I felt his fingers stroke my neck as he disengaged his arm from around me as I stood up. I smiled to myself. Very subtle, Viking.

I picked up my empty iced tea glass on the way to the kitchen. I didn't bother with the light; I could navigate the house blindfolded. I opened the refrigerator and removed the plastic pitcher of sweet tea in the door and filled my glass. I took a quick drink before I turned and headed back to Eric. I found him standing to one side of the window, looking out with his brows drawn together.

"Something wrong?" I asked him.

He didn't move for a moment, and when he turned back to me his face had completely relaxed.

"Thought I heard something."

"Probably Bill," I told him quietly as I plopped back down on the couch. Eric had paused the tape. "He wanders around a lot at night."

"So I noticed earlier," he replied quietly. He came over and sat down by me, leaning forward, placing his forearms on his knees, and looked straight ahead. "What did he say to you earlier before he left?"

I winced. He had caught that, huh? I should have figured he would.

"He just said he'd be close by if I needed him." I shrugged and tried to sound casual.

Eric didn't reply, just kept looking ahead. I took a sip of my tea.

"Charles told me he caught Bill outside your house the night of the fire."

I nodded. "Yep. Bill said he was just checking on me, but.." I felt my cheeks color a bit. "I think he had just caught the scent of a strange vampire and he wanted to..."

Eric interrupted me, looking at me sideways. "Check out the competition?" He chuckled. "I bet he was furious."

"Well, he wasn't happy."

Eric's smile faded a bit. "Bill has very acute senses, even for a vampire."

That took me back a little. Eric rarely - if ever - complimented Bill. (or anyone else for that matter) There was really nothing I could say to that.

"Want me to start up the movie again?" I asked casually, starting to rise. Eric stopped me by grabbing my hand.

"We can finish it later."

"Do you need to go?" I asked, doing my very best to keep my voice neutral. Inside, though, I felt the now-familiar tug of sadness grip me.

Eric shook his head. "Not necessarily. In fact," he added smoothly, "I would much prefer to enjoy your company while I have the opportunity. But I would rather your mood not be soured."

I couldn't help but smile. It's nice to know someone appreciates you, even if that person would most definitely appreciate you far more if you were naked. I leaned back against the couch, feeling suddenly cold. Eric was still leaning forward away from me. I found myself wishing he would reach out and hold me again. I wasn't about to let him know that, though.

The silence dragged for a bit.

"How is Pam doing?" I finally questioned. I knew it sounded lame, but it was the best thing I could think of to fill the tangibly quiet air between us. Eric knew what I was trying to do, of course, and called my bluff. He leaned back, propping one ankle on top of his other knee. He rested one arm on the end of the sofa, and stretched the other one out along the top. He had a long reach, and my old couch wasn't very big. His hand played with my hair. I felt an actual rush of pleasure at the little touch. Lord, was this pathetic or what?

"Do you really want to talk about Pam?" he asked me, raising his eyebrows. He was amused, oh yes.

"Not really," I answered, sliding my eyes down to the glass of the tea I was clutching with both hands on my lap. "I'd rather.." I stopped. I knew exactly who I would like to talk about, but I was really not sure I wanted to broach the subject.

I could feel Eric's gaze as he waited for me to continue. I was still trying to decide if honesty would be the best course of action here.

"If you don't tell me what you'd rather do than talk about Pam I'm afraid I'm going to assume you want to perform a very exotic dance for my viewing pleasure." He looked around the room with a calculating expression. "I'd be happy to move the furniture out of the way if you require more room."

He never quit. Ever. I closed my eyes and shook my head. "Sorry to disappoint you, but that's not exactly what I was going to say."

"Enlighten me?"

Ok, here goes nothing.

"I would rather...I would like to talk about you, if you want to know the truth." I raised my eyes to his face. I felt like a complete idiot.

Eric grinned. "Are you just trying to bolster my male ego?"

"Hardly. First of all, your ego doesn't need any bolstering. Secondly, I don't know much about you." That was surely the truth. What I truly knew about Eric Northman could be listed on one page of paper. Wide ruled. Double spaced.

Eric regarded me quietly. I turned my eyes downward again and took a sip of my iced tea. I was kicking myself. There had been several times I had been tempted to ask Eric about his life, specifically his human life, but I'd always decided against it. It never seemed to be the right time, and vampires could get mighty touchy about some things. I should have just left it alone. I shouldn't have said anything about the stupid movie being depressing, I shouldn't have gotten up to get this darn tea. I was perfectly fine in Eric's arms, feeling warm and comfortable. Now I was clutching a cold glass, I was being not held, and I was certainly no longer feeling the least bit comfy. As a matter of fact I was about as uncomfortable as I could get with those blue eyes on me and who knows what thoughts going on behind them.

The silence became pronounced and I risked a glance back at Eric. He was looking away from me, staring intently at the window. I hoped he wasn't trying to hide his amusement at my curiosity. I looked down once again and felt my embarrassment start to morph into irritation with outright anger on it's heels. This was ridiculous. Why should I feel bad about asking Eric to tell me a little something about himself, anyway? We had been lovers once, and according to Eric he wanted to be so again. I had already made the mistake of falling for one man I didn't know nearly as well as I should. I have every right in the world to ask questions of...

"What do you want to know?" Eric asked suddenly, completely derailing the really good mental rant I had going. I had to take a second to regroup.

"I don't know, Eric. Lots of things. I want to know about your life before, before you were a vampire. I want to know how a Viking wound up running a bar in Louisiana, of all places. I know you all get real touchy about that kind of thing, and you don't have to tell me. It's not a big deal. But you asked." I shrugged, trying to sound unconcerned. I met his eyes and there was no hint of amusement there, or anger, thank heavens. He looked concerned, actually. I flushed. My emotions were still on a roller coaster ride; I knew he was picking up on it.

He removed his arm from the back of the couch and patted his leg.

"Lay down, lover," he told me in a gentle voice.

Alrighty, this was a new one. But I found I simply couldn't resist. I wanted to be close to him again. I sat the glass of tea down on the closest table and then laid down across the couch, putting my head on Eric's leg and pulling my feet up until I was in a comfortably elongated fetal position. Eric reached behind me and pulled the old afghan from the back of the couch and laid it over me. Then he stroked my hair and I closed my eyes.

"I don't like it when you're frightened of me," he said softly.

"I'm not," I protested, but it was pretty weak, even to my ears. I was very, very content at the moment. Eric's caress was like a soothing balm. I felt all my negativity slipping away and I had no desire to hold onto it.

"But you were, just now." he told me. His deep voice was gentle but very, very certain. _Had_ I been scared? I didn't think so. I had had a range of other emotions but fear wasn't one of them. Was it? Eric was pretty good at this blood bond, he had been able to pinpoint my emotions accurately on more than one occasion. I thought hard, even though my inner cavewoman was annoyed that I was letting Eric's certainty of my feelings undermine my own. As I considered, a lightbulb suddenly blinked on in my head.

Dammit.

He was right.

Again.

"I guess I was frightened," I admited slowly. "Not of you, exactly, but I was afraid you wouldn't want to talk to me." My voice was little more than a whisper but he heard every word, I had no doubt. As I said the words, I knew for sure I was speaking the truth. I really, truly did want to know about Eric, my sort-of friend and former ...whatever. I wanted to understand him, or at least try to. It frightened me very much that I would never get that chance. He could shut me down without saying a word. Literally.

"You think I wouldn't talk to you?" Eric sounded surprised. "I told you, I remember how we lay in front of that fire and you told me about your life. I enjoyed it, very much. I remember everything you said. I've thought about our conversations many times."

I smiled, but sadly. "But all those times, it was always me doing the talking; me telling you about my life. It was never the other way around." Well, of course not. He had been cursed and didn't even know his own name until I told him. But still, it _was_ one-sided.

Eric's fingers picked up a piece of my hair and he twirled it in his fingers idly. I couldn't see his face, lying down the way I was, but he...well, he _felt _thoughtful. Yikes. I think I was getting better at the bond thing.

"I was the second of four children," he began, his voice somewhat distant, "and the only son to survive infancy. My father was a skilled fisherman. He taught me the trade, as his father taught him."

That surprised me. I would surely have pegged Eric as a fighter. I smiled. Eric was back to stroking my hair.

"You weren't really a Viking, then?" I asked tentatively.

"Of course I was," Eric said, not a little on the defensive side. "My homeland was what is now considered Sweden."

"Sorry, sorry," I hurried to explain. "It's just that in the movies Vikings are always out on those big ships with the dragon heads, wearing lots of fur and those helmets with the horns, and carrying big swords. You never see one with a fishing pole." I was trying to make a joke, lighten the mood. I knew it had worked when I felt Eric's body shake a little with quiet laughter.

"All Viking men were indeed warriors first and foremost. But we all had skills in other areas, as well. Farmers, merchants, fishermen. It wasn't all raids and battles, but that was certainly part of our life. We were taught fighting skills and weaponry at a very young age. We made ourselves ready to fight so we could provide or defend what we needed to survive" He paused a moment and his hand stopped moving on my hair. "I was a strong warrior," he almost whispered.

"You still are." I turned my head slightly to look up at him. I remembered his grace and agility when he defended the now-dead former Queen from would-be assassins. He had been glorious. He looked down at me and smiled just slightly. His eyes seemed to be seeing something far,far away. I turned my face back away from him and nuzzled against his thigh while I pulled the afghan up farther around my shoulders.

"Were you married?" I asked him, keeping my voice conversational. He moved his hand from my head and instead began to slide his hand up and down my arm slowly. Even feeling his strong touch through the afghan made me feel secure.

"I was. My people married quite young. Life expectancy for men was half what it is today, and even less for women. Childbirth claimed many lives, my mother included."

"I'm sorry," I said quietly, though I felt somewhat silly. It was a pretty extreme case of belated condolences.

"My elder sister ran the household well after our mother was gone."

"Did you and your wife have children?" I asked, hoping to move on to happier subjects. I was becoming more fascinated by the minute, though there was a certain sadness hearing Eric talk about his human life. Everything and everyone he had known was long gone.

"She bore me three children, though one did not survive his first winter."

He must have noticed how my body stiffened with shock. I'd heard the loss of a child was the worst pain a person could ever suffer. So much for my attempts at a happier subject.

"It wasn't unusual then. Medicines were few and we lived in a harsh environment. Infant mortality was a fact of life. My surviving children, a son and a daughter, were very strong." He paused momentarily. "I was quite proud of them. The boy was already showing unusual ability with the sword by his seventh birthday. The girl was obedient and very fair. Her mother and I often talked of the day we would have to acquire guard dogs to keep potential suitors at a safe distance."

I smiled. I found it odd the way he spoke of his family. _The boy, the girl, her mother. _He never said their names_. _I wondered briefly if he even remembered them, but then chided myself for such a thought. Eric would not forget. But I did wonder if he wished he could.

"What happened to you?" I asked him softly. He knew what I meant. He was back to stroking my hair. I was back to wondering if this was a conversation I really wanted to have. Eric paused for a long while before he answered.

"The men in our area were called to assist when a neighboring district was falling under attack. The final battle lasted long after dark descended. In the end we were able to repel the raiders but it cost many lives. I was one of only a few that survived the night." Eric's paused and his voice took on a hardened edge when he continued. "I stayed for several days to assist with disposal of the dead and rebuilding. On the night before I was to return home, while I slept, I was attacked, drained and buried. I awoke in the ground many nights later. It was winter and very cold. Snow and ice covered every inch of earth. I dug myself out of my grave and found I had no knowledge of the area where I had been taken. What was left of my clothes were soaked red with blood but I had no memory of the one that attacked me. I rose alone. I knew I was changed; I was stronger and faster and I was nearly insane with hunger but I had no desire for food. When I came across a farmer one night on the road, I finally knew what I had become. My people had stories of blood drinking demons that walked at night. I recognized myself in the legends."

I hadn't even felt myself sit up, but I was suddenly staring into Eric's expressionless face. I knew I must look as utterly stunned as I felt. I had a terrible vision of Eric, bloody and filthy, clawing his way from the dirt, lost and alone in a faraway land of snow and ice.

"Oh, Eric," I breathed. I sounded horrified and I was. "Where was..the one that turned you?"

"My sire had already moved on to secure another child, but I could feel his pull. I was compelled to move, to find him, and finally I did. The journey took five nights."

"He left you?" I couldn't imagine such cruelty. "Why would he choose you to be his child and then leave you?"

Eric's eyes flashed for a moment with anger but then the moment was gone and he resumed his calm dialogue.

"My sire wasn't looking for a companion, or a lover or even a servant. Times were very different then. Vampires were in danger much more from others of our kind than from humans. Battles raged between nests for rights over hunting areas. My sire wanted to create his own nest of warriors who would obey him without question and fight for him. The only way to insure complete obedience was through the bond between maker and child. He witnessed and admired my strength and skill in battle and decided to take me."

"And he made you fight for him?"

Eric paused a moment, then nodded. "He had a particularly violent nature. Barbaric. But the call to obey was too strong. We had no choice but to submit. I and my nestmates were weapons in his arsenal, nothing more."

I was very close to the point of wishing I had never, ever asked Eric about his life. This powerful vampire, one who had protected me, saved me and cared for me, had been in virtual slavery for God only knows how many centuries. I felt sick.

"What happened to him?" I whispered. Oh, how I hoped he had died a nasty death.

"He lives," Eric said, dashing my hopes. "He resides in Asia now, or so it says on Bill's computer database."

"When did he let you go?" I had an almost uncontrollable urge to wrap my arms around Eric and never, ever let go.

"He didn't. Our numbers grew in size and strength over the decades and we gained many victories. We held a sizable area, but eventually my sire became too greedy and forced us to attack a much larger nest. We were defeated. Most of my nestmates were killed. The leader of the ones who claimed victory, a female of great power, offered my maker a deal. She told him she would allow him to live if he did three things. First, he had to leave in exile. Second, he had to swear loyalty to her and give her half his assets for one hundred years. Finally, he had to relinquish his claim on me and transfer my bond and oath to her. She found me desirable. My maker agreed and I was made to swear fealty to my new mistress."

I knew my eyes were about to pop out of my head. "So he sold you? To save himself?"

Eric nodded. "It was a turning point for me. My mistress was not cruel, though she was unwavering in her demands. I pleased her and eventually she released me from my service to her."

"And your maker, he never called to you again?"

"No. And if he would have tried, there would have been severe punishment. For him."

"Why?"

"This happened right around the time when our current system of governing was starting to take hold. The world we have that you so despise, with Kings and Queens" he grinned at me, "and Sheriffs evolved slowly over time to prevent our kind from slaughtering one another to extinction. My maker made a vow, and laws were in place at that time to make sure he honored it. Those few of us that have known life before the hierarchy came to power have great respect for our ruling system. It's imperfect, yes. It is sometimes unfair. But it is a far lesser evil than the lawlessness of the Old Days."

My head was swimming with all this new information. It was horrible, it was fascinating. It also explained a lot about Eric's character. His devotion to his position, to his people. His tenderness toward Pam, his child, who he dug up and held the night she rose as vampire. Even his refusal of the witch Hallow, who told Eric she would all but leave his business alone if he submitted to her lust for him for seven nights. He wouldn't be bought as a plaything again, it seemed.

I considered for a moment that there were two kinds of people in the world: Those that are wronged, and who do wrong to others in return; and then there are the strong ones, those that refuse to inflict those same wrongs on another. Eric was the latter. My heart swelled for him just then. What happened to him was so unfair, so beyond imagination. His strength, truly, was not just physical.

Eric was looking at me, his blue eyes searching my face. I laid back down, put my head on his leg. He stroked my cheek, my hair. I closed my eyes.

"Is my story-telling putting you to sleep, lover?" Eric teased me.

"No, not at all. It's just so hard for me to comprehend." That was certainly the truth.

"It was a different time. In another thousand years the way of life we have now might be considered just as barbaric." How he could be so matter-of-fact was a mystery.

"Did you ever see your family again?" I asked after a few quiet minutes.

"No. I never went back."

"Did you miss them at all?"

Eric went completely still. Uh oh. I raised my head, and saw Eric's face was hard as stone.

"I'm sorry, that didn't come out right. I didn't know if afterwards..when you were a vampire, if you still had any human feelings for your family."

Eric relaxed, just a fraction. "Yes. Human emotions don't disappear. They are eventually discarded in lieu of others that are more suited for survival as an immortal. As for my family, I took great comfort that my wife had one brother that still lived. She would have been well cared for after my death."

"He would have taken care of her?"

Eric stiffened again. "Of course. He was a man of honor. He would have taken her and the children into his household until the time of mourning had past and another suitable mate could have been found for her."

Having an honorable brother must be a nice thing. Not that I would know.

"It's so tragic, Eric." I knew I sounded melodramatic but didn't care.

He traced his fingers up and down my neck under my hair. "Do not pity me, Sookie. Of all the things I want you to feel for me, pity is not one of them."

I smiled. I decided right then and there to make a concerted effort to pull myself out of dark mood that had overcome me. I needed to look on the upside of the night. Eric had just told me more about himself in one evening than he had in the whole time I'd known him. I had gotten a peek into his carefully guarded life and it was an amazing thing, if not more than a little bit disconcerting.

"Alright, no pity from me, then." I sat up a bit and nuzzled my head into his shoulder. His arm wrapped around me. I turned my head and kissed him very lightly on the lips. "Thank you. I really do like talking to you."

Eric gave me a very Eric grin. "If that's the response I get from recounting ancient history for you I'll have to do it more often." His eyes gleamed and he looked cocky as hell right then. "I have a millenia worth of tales stored up in here." He tapped a finger to his temple.

I smiled up at him. "Pick some good ones. I don't think I have time to hear them all. I am mortal, remember?"

Eric laughed and bent over, kissed the top of my head.

_"I could change that, so very easily."_

My heart skipped a beat.

I _heard_ the words. I heard them in my head as surely as if they'd been spoken aloud. It wasn't a real voice, not the way it was when I listened to human thoughts; It was just a hint of a whisper, but drenched with a coldness that was unmistakably vampire. And the only vampire mind around belonged to my blood-bonded former lover.

I felt my eyes go wide with horror. The words, the terrible words, repeated over and over in my head like a mantra. I sat straight up and whipped my head around to see Eric staring at me with concern.

"Sookie...?"

Without thinking, I was suddenly on my feet and across the room. Was Eric really thinking about offering to turn me? No, he wouldn't _offer_ because he knew damn well I would never, ever want to be anything but the human I was. I had never suspected, never even really entertained the possibility that Eric would ever consider changing me. Draining me. _Killing_ me. I was so naive, so stupid! All the pieces began to fall into place as I recalled the little tell-tale warning signs I surely should have seen but foolishly ignored: Quinn's statement that Eric could turn me at any time now that we were bonded, Bill's warning this very night that I should be cautious, even Eric's own words on the day he told me the news of Bill's kidnaping_ "You might make a decent vampire, Sookie"_.

No no no no no no!

I whirled and looked at Eric with a horrible mixture of fear and hatred in my face. I felt strangely betrayed, though I knew I shouldn't be surprised by anything anymore, not where vampires were concerned. But still...Eric! I had saved his life, he had saved mine. We had made love together. And against my better judgment I was actually starting to think he might genuinely care for me and I him. _Idiot!_ Why can't I learn?

And the most absolutely infuriating thing was that Eric was looking at me with a blank expression, like he didn't even know what he had done to upset me. How could he sit there, looking so calm, feigning concern, while in his head he was plotting my death. Damn vamps! I shook my head at him. My voice was shaky with outrage and pain when I spoke. I felt tears welling up in my eyes.

"I heard that, Eric. I can't believe you would think such a thing," I was on the verge of hysteria. I felt like I was standing outside myself looking in. "How _dare you _even consider turning me into one of you?"

And as soon as I said it; the very instant the words left my lips I realized my mistake. I saw Eric's eyes go wide and I _knew_. I had a stomach churning moment of helplessness and inevitability; like shutting a car door and realizing just a split second too late that your keys were still inside. I spun away and faced the wall as the full extent of my mistake hit me full on.

In my fear and anger I had just foolishly given away my most closely guarded secret to one of the most powerful and dangerous vampires I had ever met.

I had never told anyone, not Bill, not Quinn, not even Claudine or Niall that I was able to sometimes catch glimpses into the minds of vampires. I kept that secret locked down and locked away because I knew what would happen if vampires ever found out- if they ever even _suspected _- that I could see into their thoughts.

I reached up and held my hand to my throat, terrified to turn around and face Eric. My instincts told me to run, fast and far, but I couldn't move. I could barely breathe. I began to shake. Without warning I felt myself being spun around just short of violently, and two big hands clamped down hard on my upper arms. I looked straight ahead, seeing nothing except Eric's dark shirt right in front of my face, filling my vision, as he stood just inches away. I raised my head very slowly, cautiously. I saw the pale skin on his neck come into view just above the dark fabric, I saw the strong curve of his jaw and wisps of blonde hair. I saw fangs. I lifted my head the last few inches and found myself staring into blue eyes that were so cold and hard I thought it would freeze the blood in my veins.

_"Watch out,"_ Eric had once told me _"Or I will begin to think you can read my mind." _The warning in those words had not been lost on me.

I remember thinking that if vampires ever knew I could read their thoughts I would be drained and dead before I hit the floor.

Looking at Eric's hard face I could only pray I would be so lucky.

_To be continued_


	6. Chapter 6

Know Thyself

Chapter 6

I could feel a tangle of emotions rolling from Eric but I was far too absorbed in my own to decipher any of them with much success. Not that I needed to; his stance, his expression and his eyes told me everything I wanted to know. (or, more specifically, everything I wish I didn't know) There was rage there, oh yes. I could feel it loud and clear in the way he was gripping my arms.

"What did you hear, Sookie?" he demanded of me. His voice was deep, the words spoken slowly, heavy with his usually well-concealed accent.

I couldn't answer him. I was too far gone for words. He shook me.

"Tell me _now_." He wasn't yelling and somehow that made him even more frightening. I could feel a pressure inside my head; he was using every ounce of his vampire influence on me. Right then I wished he _could_ glamour me; I really didn't want to feel what was coming.

I had a surreal moment and my mind sort of detached from my body. I wondered idly what it was going to feel like to die. I thought about Jason and wished we would have had time to make things right between us. I knew we could have, eventually. I wondered who Sam would take to his brother's wedding instead of me. I hoped Quinn found a good woman who would love him like he deserved. I thought about my little telepathic cousin and prayed he would be able to find a place for himself in this world. I thought about Bill. So much pain there. Too much...

"Sookie, answer me!" This time he did raise his voice and it snapped me back to The Moment. I blinked up at him and felt a single tear slide down my cheek. Eric lifted his chin a fraction and seemed to reign in his emotions somewhat. But he didn't let go of me, not even a little bit.

A sudden strength of purpose suddenly began to flow into me. From where it came I had no idea, but I embraced it. I resolutely decided, just then, that if I was going to die it would not be as a coward. I inhaled deeply and found my voice.

"It was after I told you I was mortal," I began, impressed with myself for how steady I sounded.

Eric's eyes narrowed.

"Tell me _precisely_ what you heard. I want to know the exact words." He was focused on me, unblinking. I gave it right back at him.

"I can change that, so very easily."

Eric drew back from me just slightly. He growled; an actual, honest to God growl. He raised up to his full height and looked over the top of my head, staring at the window like he was trying to decipher a very complicated math problem. He didn't move a muscle for possibly twenty seconds, but in that short time I could see him processing everything that had happened, everything I had told him. I wondered if he was deciding the best way to dispose of my body. His face never changed expression but there were flashes behind his eyes and flares in his emotions that told me something was happening in there.

Well, something was happening in here, too. I just remembered I was a mortal human. And Eric, most assuredly, was not.

"Eric Northman, _I rescind your invitation_!"

He snapped his eyes back to mine for just a fraction of a second, then looked back up over my head just as quickly. For one terrible moment I thought I had made a mistake. He still had a grip on me; could he drag me with him when the magic forced him out my door? But before I could even worry about that I felt myself being tossed up and aside like a rag doll. I landed butt first onto the couch, hard, causing it to slide backwards about a foot. When I looked up Eric was already out the back door, which he left standing wide open. I felt the sting of the cold night air intrude on the warmth of the house and I shivered. I gathered myself after a moment, a throbbing ache swelling in my arms where Eric had seized me. I stood shakily and headed for the door meaning to slam it shut. I saw Eric standing just on the other side of the porch, his head snapping from right to left. He spun back to face me and our eyes met, then he launched himself straight up into the air and disappeared.

I didn't wait around for anything else to happen. I slammed the door and leaned against it, breathing heavily. My brain and heart were both working furiously to figure out what had just happened. No, that wasn't exactly true. I knew darn well what had happened - I had screwed up in a jumbo sized way. Maybe it was all the cozy feeling that had been building up during the night that lulled me into a false sense of security and made me so careless. I was severely disgusted with myself but self flagellation would have to wait until later.

Now that I was safely alone, I could take a minute to just think. I had to admit to myself the possibility that what I heard...well, it could have just been a stray thought. People had errant thoughts all the time, some of them absolutely terrible, but they don't necessarily act on them. Surely it's the same with vampires, right? But even if that was the case - a _big_ if - my fate was sealed the moment I let it slip that I heard it. Bravo, Sookie.

Jesus God, What was wrong with me?

Having no answer for that question, I concentrated on what was right with me, which was that I wasn't dead. Not yet. And I knew one person that could undeniably help me stay that way.

I needed to call my great-grandfather.

Now what was that number? Oh _hell_! That was one I should have memorized. It was programmed in my cell phone, though. Crap crap crap! Where was my cell phone? I was very close to the edge, and I tried desperately to get a grip on myself. I needed to calm down. I closed my eyes and made a concerted attempt at slowing my racing heart. With effort, I succeeded. Okay, my cell phone was in my purse and my purse was... right, in the bedroom. Got it.

I took off down the hall and flipped on the bedroom light. I grabbed my purse off the chair in the corner and went into the bathroom and shut the door. I didn't bother rummaging through my purse to find anything, I just turned it upside down and dumped the entire contents into the sink. I snatched up the little red cell phone and flipped it open with shaking hands. The screen was blank.

I knew right then and there I would never, ever forget again to put my cell phone on the charger.

Okie dokie, moving on to plan B.

Niall's business card (my 'get out of jail free card' as I had taken to calling it) was taped inside my little address book by the kitchen phone. I cracked open the door to the bathroom and peeked out, then berated myself for being ridiculous. I high-tailed it back down the hall at a dead run and cried out when two strong arms grabbed me around the waist and spun me around. I closed my eyes involuntarily and pushed blindly but found myself locked in a vice grip.

"Sookie! Sookie! It's me!"

I knew that voice; that beautiful, cool voice. I opened my eyes and saw Bill staring at me with concern in his eyes.

"Bill," I breathed and just fell forward into his arms. I should have been more cautious, I know. It was entirely possible Eric had decided since he couldn't get to me he would make Bill do the deed. I (very) briefly considered rescinding Bill's invitation, too, but the way he was holding me I felt anything but threatened. He pulled me in close and stroked my hair, whispered words of comfort. Something inside me let go like a pressure release valve and I could not stop the tears. After a few minutes Bill gently but firmly held me away from him and looked me over with a practiced eye.

"Are you okay? Have you been hurt at all? I saw Eric and he..."

I raised my hand in a 'stop' motion and shook my head. "No, no. I'm fine, just fine." That wasn't even close to the truth, but whatever. "I think my arms are bruised," I added absently.

Bill seemed to relax immediately.

"You saw Eric?" I asked quietly. Bill's face contorted in what I can only say was anguish, but it only lasted for a heartbeat then his features relaxed again. His voice was oddly gentle when he responded.

"You don't need to worry about him, Sookie."

Ha! Like heck I didn't. I was on a Viking vampire's shit-list. I should be doing nothing but worrying.

Bill pulled me back into his arms and I felt him press his face into my hair, inhaling. The action stirred up some long-buried memories but I pushed them away. I had quite enough to deal with already.

"Come with me," Bill said, disengaging from the embrace and wrapping one arm around my waist instead. He led me to the living room and helped me into the chair. He pushed the couch back to it's proper position then knelt in front of me and raised one hand to gently wipe away a tear from my cheek.

"What happened, Sookie?" he asked me. "Eric was...I don't think I've ever seen him like that before." He focused on my face. "Or you, either."

I looked at my former boyfriend, my first love and lover. He must have witnessed Eric's sensational exit. Would it hurt to tell him the truth? Yes, it would. Or maybe not. I honestly wasn't sure. I was aware enough of my emotional state to realize I was in no condition to make what could be a life-threatening decision.

"He left?" I asked, completely side-stepping the question. Bill cupped my face in one hand and nodded.

"Yes. But you're safe here with me. I'll stay as long as I need to."

"I'm glad you're here," I said in a whisper and I meant it. This night for me had been an emotional tsunami, but something about Bill's familiar presence was keeping me from drowning. He was something solid and steady that I could see and feel and touch. He was holding both my hands in both of his now. We just sat like that together for a while.

After a time, Bill looked at me with dark eyes that were brimming with resolute tenderness. "Sookie, I meant it when I said I would die for you. I meant it when I said I would kill Victor if he ever hurt you."

"I know you did," I told him after a long pause. Where was that coming from? Why Bill would bring up the takeover mess right now was a mystery. Maybe he wanted to make sure I hadn't forgotten his dramatic speech that night. Well, no worries there. I hadn't.

"Bill!"

Eric's unexpected booming voice was loud and clear even through the door. I jumped a little when I heard him, and I reached up to put a hand over my heart. Bill patted my knee and gave me the barest hint of a smile, then stood up immediately and walked quickly to the back door and opened it. My eyes went wide. I had no idea why Eric had returned or what he was wanting with Bill. I hoped there wouldn't be a fight. There was such a difference in their ages I knew who would win and I wouldn't see Bill hurt or killed just because I couldn't keep myself out of trouble for one night. I stood up, not sure exactly what I was going to do but knowing I had to do something.

Or not.

"Did you find him?" Bill asked in a remarkably calm voice.

"I lost him about a mile out," was Eric's reply. I couldn't see his face but his tone was distinctly unhappy.

"Did he know you were following him?" Bill asked. His voice had taken on a guarded edge.

"I don't believe so. He had a good lead, especially since I took the extra time to locate you."

Alright, this conversation was a little peculiar, to say the least. I was getting the very distinct impression I was missing something here. I took a few steps toward Bill and leaned forward.

"What's going on? Who was he looking for?" I whispered. I knew Bill could hear me. I was hoping Eric couldn't.

Bill shifted his eyes to me and frowned. Then he looked back at Eric, who was standing a little way off from the house, out in the very gravel driveway he had bought for me. It seemed so long ago all of a sudden.

"You didn't tell her?" Bill asked, his tone at once incredulous and confused. There was a significant pause.

"I wasn't given the chance." An iceberg couldn't have been colder than Eric's voice.

Bill turned his gaze to me, looking very solemn. "Sookie, Victor Madden was here tonight."

I opened my mouth, closed it again. A dreadful feeling began to spread in my chest.

"How do you know?"

"I caught his scent earlier. He tried to keep it contained," Bill continued, "but I recognized it easily enough once I found the trail. That's why I came by earlier this evening. I didn't know what his purpose was in coming here and I don't trust him. I was hoping you would invite me in so I could..." he stopped. I knew what he was going to say. He didn't want to offend me.

"Keep an eye on me?" I finished for him and he nodded.

"I didn't realize Eric was already here. I told you I would be close, and I was. Eric found me in the cemetery and told me I needed to get over here right away, that I wasn't to leave you alone. He told me he was going to find Victor to..." Bill glanced back over his shoulder at Eric. "To.. ascertain his purpose in coming here." He tried, and failed, to not sound skeptical there at the end.

I was back in the chair. I didn't even remember sitting down.

"Sookie, what did you think was happening? Why are you so upset?"

I looked up at Bill with shame in my eyes. "Eric," I answered honestly. I felt a wave of anger wash through me from head to toe. Oh yes, the Viking had heard me, every word.

Bill looked from me, to Eric and back again. I knew he was trying to put it all together. Well, that made two of us.

Victor Madden had been here at my house. Had he followed Eric? Vampires were forever trailing after one another it seemed, so that wasn't such a stretch. Or was Victor looking for me? That seemed highly unlikely. But his reason for being here was secondary to the bigger question: Just how long had he been lurking around outside my house? What was doing? Spying on Eric? On me? To what end?

"Oh," I puffed as a terrible thought occurred to me. Victor may have been outside my house when I argued with Eric. And if he had been close....with his supernatural hearing... I was willing to stake my life he had heard every word, including the ones most damning. It fit. That was why Eric had taken off like the proverbial bat out of hell; why he found Bill and ordered him to stay with me.

If Eric had indeed been going after Victor I seriously doubted he was planning on just having a little midnight chat when he found him. But Eric had lost him. And now Victor Madden was running free, possibly carrying my terrible truth with him. This was so very, very bad. Could I have made any more of a mess of things? I doubted it. _Okay, Stackhouse_, I told myself firmly, _enough with being a crying little girl afraid of the big bad vampires_. What do you do when you make a mess? You start cleaning.

I knew what I had to do, first of all. I had to march myself over to that door and get some real answers from the Viking. The one who may or not may not be planning to drain me dry. The one who may or may not have been trying to protect me tonight. The one who was definitely still standing out in my driveway in the cold, banished by my say-so.

I stood up, went to the door and met Eric's eyes with as much dignity as I could muster and believe me, that wasn't a whole lot. His gaze was fierce and drilled right into me. There was a light breeze in the air and little tendrils of blond whipped around his face. He wasn't wearing his jacket because it was still in my living room. Vampire or not, he had to be freezing but you would never have been able to tell from his expression. After a long moment, he turned to Bill.

"You need to leave. I have matters to discuss with Sookie." There was no ignoring the command in that voice.

Bill took my hand gently, and leaned over to kiss me lightly on the cheek, then he was out the door. He looked none too happy. He stopped in front of Eric and gave a little formal bow from the neck, just as he had done earlier in the night. I got the impression Bill and Eric were having one of those silent conversations, like they had done the night of the takeover. Then he started moving silently into the darkness.

"Bill," I called to him, taking a step onto the porch. He stopped, and turned his face halfway back to me so I could see his profile.

"Thank you." I hoped the sincerity I felt was reflected in my voice.

Bill just nodded and disappeared into the night.

That left me alone with Eric and a violent conflict of emotions. I stepped back into the house just past the threshold. I wrapped my arms around myself against the chill, the chill that wasn't entirely from the weather. Eric was giving me one of his fixed vampire stares. I couldn't read his expression at all and, of course, there was nothing from his silent brain. _Nothing. _

As I considered that, another piece of the puzzle landed with a resounding thud.

"It wasn't you, was it?" I asked softly. I knew Eric could hear me and he understood what I meant. There was only the briefest pause before he answered.

"No."

I shut my eyes. So there it was. It hadn't been Eric's thought I had heard earlier. It had been Victor's. My anger had been horribly, terribly misplaced. My most carefully guarded secret had been revealed to not one, but two, powerful and dangerous vampires. I could add a couple more glaring mistakes to the growing list I had been compiling during the evening.

I opened my eyes and squeaked out a sharp gasp when I saw Eric standing right in front of me, just on the other side of the doorway he could not cross. I hadn't even heard him move.

"You can read vampire minds," he said quietly. It wasn't a question. His accent was still pronounced and he still had fang showing.

"Sometimes," I whispered. No reason trying to lie at this point.

"You are afraid." Again, not a question.

"Yes."

"You should be," he said icily. "Now let me in."

Jesus save me, I did.

-

_To be continued_

(hope it wasn't too cheesebally!)_  
_


	7. Chapter 7

Know Thyself

Chapter Seven

I wasn't certain how long I had been sitting on edge of the couch cushions just staring at the television. I was certain it hadn't been nearly as long as it felt. I was leaned forward with my elbows on my knees and my hands clasped together in front of me. The T.V. was silent but the picture on the screen was the same as it had been when Eric had paused the tape earlier. My VCR was old and a myriad of fuzzy lines distorted the frozen image though it was still recognizable. Scarlet's face was locked in an angry scowl that looked almost comical. With everything else I needed to think about I found it amusing I would even notice such a thing.

I had taken a short trip to the bathroom earlier while Eric had made a phone call. (Pam I thought, though I didn't ask and he didn't volunteer the information) I washed my face and neck with warm water, ran a brush through my hair and even dabbed on some lipstick and blush for some who-knows-why reason. Maybe I was trying to fake myself out, thinking if I didn't look like such a wreck on the outside that my insides would follow suit. If that had been my plan, I had failed miserably. I was a mess.

Eric was off the phone now and turned away from me, standing in front of the fire silently, looking at nothing. Maybe he was simply warming himself after being outside for so long in the cold, maybe he was trying to decide the best course of action to deal with me. His face told me nothing and I certainly wasn't about to broach the subject. I was feeling almost contrite, for lack of a better word, and more than a little anxious about my future (no matter how short a future I may have now).

I turned my mind to Victor Madden, trying to recall everything I knew about him. It wasn't much, not much at all. He was ruthless, I had been told. And he was a skilled liar, as he proved the night of the coup. Amelia thought he had eyes on advancement and Eric said he wouldn't waste anything he thought he could use. That was a scary thought. Victor was also trusted by and owed the King his loyalty. And Felipe De Castro had declared I was under his formal protection now. I wondered if that edict included Victor, as well.

"A fool with a silver net," Eric said suddenly and so softly I wasn't even sure I had heard him. I didn't even know if he was really talking to me.

I lifted my head and found Eric hadn't moved. I stared at his back, confused.

"What?" I asked carefully.

Eric turned to me, then. His face looked chiseled from stone, his eyes just as hard.

"Explain what you meant by 'sometimes'" he told me.

I must have looked as addled as I felt.

"You said you could sometimes read vampire minds," he explained slowly, his voice loaded with a forced patience.

Oh, right. It took me a minute to catch up, lost as I had been in my own thoughts. I shifted a bit on the couch. There was no way around this conversation and both Eric and I knew it.

"It's only happened a few times," I told him softly. I saw his eyes narrow in suspicion. "I swear. And it's completely different from the way I can read humans and even other supes. It's just flashes and it's real quick."

"Tell me."

I took a deep breath. In for a penny, in for a pound. "The last time before tonight was at Rhodes." I hesitated but a glance at Eric's face told me to keep going. He was clearly in no mood to play the hem and haw game. "At Sophie Anne's trial, when I said I heard Henrik's lawyer's thoughts...after I had already stood up I realized I had actually been hearing Henrik." I remembered, also, that Eric had stood with me that night, silently giving me strength and protecting my back. It was only by sheer luck my talent - curse - hadn't been discovered right then. If I would have been found out, Eric most likely would have died right alongside me, being viewed as a traitor or spy or worse. I hadn't considered that before. But Eric, clearly, had cottoned onto that in seconds. His face appeared whiter, if such a thing was possible.

"That was very dangerous, Sookie."

Wow, you think?

"I know that, Eric. When I realized what had happened I was completely terrified. I never wanted to be able to hear any of you. I never wanted to be able to hear anyone, but especially not vampires! That was one of the reasons I liked Bill so much, you know. Because he was silent to me and I could relax."

Eric looked at me for a long moment. "You should have told me," he said finally.

"I couldn't," I replied, looking down at my hands.

"We are tied, Sookie!" he thundered. Eric had never raised his voice to me like that and it shook me to my core. The look on my face must have been remarkable because Eric seemed to make an effort to pull back his temper. When he spoke again his voice was more controlled but still had a definite edge. "I have....we are bound. What effects you will effect me. I know our blood bond was against your will but that is irrelevant now."

"Irrelevant...?" I sputtered, hardly even knowing what to say I was so taken aback. "This is my life, Eric!"

"And I am trying to preserve it!" He was back to yelling. "It would be a great help if you would make at least some attempt to acknowledge that fact and possibly try to assist my efforts."

We stared at one another for a long while, but finally I found I couldn't hold onto my indignation. It was hard to have an argument regarding my welfare with an individual that had taken bullets for me. As my anger seeped away, it appeared Eric's did as well.

"Tell me the rest," He said at last, his voice flat, unemotional and cold but not exactly angry anymore. I thought for a moment.

"After the trial, I picked up on Gervaise for just a second or two. It was nothing dramatic, he was just thinking about Carla and how much he liked having something others wanted."

"Have you ever heard Bill?"

I shook my head. "Never."

"Me?"

The extended silence answered that question. Eric took a step towards me. I shuddered.

"When?" he demanded. His eyes were focused on me and I couldn't look away even though I desperately wanted to.

"The night you made me come to Fangtasia to read the humans about the money that was stolen."

His brows pulled together just slightly but he made no other movement. "Tell me."

I hesitated, but only for a moment. I was afraid I'd lose my nerve if I stopped now.

"Snakes," I whispered.

Eric's eyes widened. "Snakes?" he repeated, looking dubious.

I nodded. "You were thinking you could make me do anything you wanted, anytime. You could threaten me, or someone I cared about. Your mind, it was all cold and twisting. I felt like I had been dropped into a pit of snakes." My voice dropped until it was barely audible and I lowered my eyes. "It was horrible."

Eric didn't speak again for a long while and when I risked a glance up I found him staring into the fire. I wondered if the truth had hurt him, then I pushed away the influx of concern. He shouldn't have asked if he didn't want to know.

"And you have never forgotten," he said at last, turning to face me. "Is this why you pull back from me?"

Close, but no cigar, Viking.

"I'm not stupid, Eric," I told him, defensiveness creeping into my voice. "I know there is more to you than just that flash of your mind. If I thought you were nothing but a manipulative and dangerous snake I would never have spent one second longer with you than I absolutely had to. I would never have invited you into my home and into my bed, cursed or not. And to answer your question...no, I haven't forgotten and I never will. I don't think I can."

"Will you ever not fear me, Sookie?" Something in his face made me want to lie. I chose sarcasm instead.

"You're here now, aren't you?" I was starting to rally a bit, now that I was feeling a little better about the possibility of surviving the night. He just glared at me. He was still waiting for a real answer, but I wasn't sure I was ready to offer one. My offense kicked in, masking my hesitation.

"Let me ask you something, Eric" I said. "If the situation were reversed, would you be afraid of me?"

He thought for just a moment. "Perhaps," he said simply.

I thought so.

"Have you told anyone else about these 'flashes' you get?" he changed the subject quickly, going on in a detached manner, like a cop trying to gather information from a witness about some petty crime.

"No!" I said immediately. "I've never told anyone."

"Bill?"

"No one," I said emphatically. "I was planning to take that information to my grave." I cringed inside. Okay, bad choice of words. Eric's face seemed almost amused for just a moment.

"You have kept it to yourself all this time," he mused. "Until tonight. I wonder what happened."

"I know what happened!" I did some voice raising of my own, now. I pushed my hair back with both hands. "I let my guard down. I felt happy and safe, like I _always _do when you're around me now. And we were having fun, at least I was. I was thinking maybe..." I trailed off, not willing to let myself think of the simple enjoyment earlier in the night. "It doesn't matter. When I heard what Victor was thinking, when I thought it was you, it snapped me back so fast I just...lost it." I sagged back into the couch feeling bone tired.

Eric looked at me thoughtfully, almost with compassion. That was a new one.

"What are we going to do about this, Sookie?" Eric asked me, though I had a feeling he already had a good idea.

"Is that a question?" I asked him, my tone sullen.

Eric actually laughed, a short bark that sounded anything but amused. "Have you rescinded Victor's invitation?"

I sucked in a sharp breath. Oh hell, had I? The night of the takeover had been such an emotional nightmare; it was still a bit of a blur. I honestly couldn't recall. Yikes.

"I don't remember," I said slowly, sounding justifiably embarrassed.

Eric's brows raised. "I know how much you despise my telling you what to do, but I would like to suggest, in the most strenuous way possible, that you do that. The sooner the better."

I couldn't agree more.

"Did you know he was here the whole time?" I asked.

Eric's frowned. "No, but I suspected. Victor calls me every night on the office phone at Fangtasia. He tried to do so tonight, but of course I wasn't there. I assumed that would arouse suspicion with the King having left so recently. And as I told you earlier, Victor does not trust me." He looked at me sideways. "So it seems you two have something in common."

That was a cheap shot, but I may have deserved it. Maybe.

"He was the one on the phone earlier?" I asked, ignoring the jibe.

"No, that was another area Sheriff in the chain. But I received a text from Pam telling me Victor had tried to reach me at the club just after nightfall."

"She told him you were coming here?" I asked hesitantly. That didn't sound like Pam.

"No," Eric answered immediately. "But Victor is nothing if not well informed. It wouldn't have taken much for him to trace me. I knew there was the possibility he would have me watched, though I didn't think he would do it himself. When Bill came by earlier tonight, I knew someone had been sent."

I sat up straight. "You've lost me. What does Bill have to do with Victor?"

Eric looked at me for a long moment. "Bill has always watched over you, that is no secret."

No, it wasn't. I nodded.

Eric continued. "I told him if he ever suspected trouble he was find a way into your house so he could protect you physically." Eric's face went dark. "He...balked."

My eyes felt like they would pop from my head. I wasn't sure what offended me more; that Eric would order Bill to weasel his way into my house or that Bill would refuse to help me if I was in danger. Eric's motives I understood, which was kind of spooky when I thought about it. He was trying to protect me by the most direct means at his disposal (Bill). But it hurt me more than it should that my ex-boyfriend would hesitate to assist me.

"He balked?" I repeated, sounding not a little bit offended.

Eric nodded, watching me closely. "He said he gave his word that he wouldn't force himself or his company on you, so he refused my order, in a way. He said he would keep watch on you, as always, but he would not intrude upon you on mere_ suspicion_, as he felt that would be a violation of the vow he made to you. He could not be dissuaded." Eric frowned. "He said he would only insist on entry if he knew the threat was imminent. And he sounded quite insistent tonight."

"Oh," I breathed, shutting my eyes. How many times was I going to have to jump to conclusions before I learned to keep my feet on the ground? Bill hadn't been hesitant to protect me if I needed him, he had simply been loathe to break his promise to me without good cause. He had even defied Eric to keep his word. I felt suddenly and deeply ashamed at myself. I was going to have to think on this later. And I was going to make sure I didn't miss church on Sunday, either. I hoped Jesus was more forgiving to me than I had been to others.

Just then the phone rang in the kitchen. I glanced at the clock. It was past midnight and I couldn't imagine who would be calling this late. Another ring. Eric looked at me expectantly.

"I should get that," I said and headed into the kitchen to grab the phone mid-ring."Hello?"

"Hey Sookie!" said an excited voice. Amelia.

"Oh, hi. Is everything okay?" She sounded absolutely giddy.

"Oh yeah, everything is great. I'm really sorry I called so late but I wanted to let you know Octavia and I will be staying with friends tonight and I didn't want you to worry when we didn't come home."

"Oh," I said, feeling a pang of guilt. I hadn't even thought about that with everything else going on tonight. Some friend I was. "Well, thanks for calling and letting me know. You sound like you're having fun."

"Oh yeah! It's amazing! I can't believe all the people we met tonight. We hooked up with some some witches from out of state that Octavia knows. They are really powerful, Sookie. One is an absolute legend! They invited us to come along with them while they did some work and of course we couldn't say no. We're heading there now. I'll tell you all about it when I get back, okay?"

I nodded, even though she couldn't see me. "That sounds great. I can't wait to hear about it." I knew my voice sounded anything but excited.

"You okay, girl? You don't sound like yourself?"

Perceptive.

"I'm fine. I've just been a little emotional today, I guess."

"PMS? I have some pamprin up in my room if you need it."

I choked out a little giggle. How I wished bloating and cramps were my biggest problems.

"Thanks, I'll remember. Tell Octavia I said Hi. I'll see you tomorrow then."

I hung up and walked slowly back to Eric and took my previous position on the couch. I peered up at him.

"So what's going to happen?" I asked. It was the fifty thousand dollar question, of course.

A short pause. "I'm not sure," Eric told me, his eyes focusing on something distant. "There are many variables at play now, and any one of them could change in a moment."

"What are you going to do?" I asked softly, though I was really and truly dreading the answer.

"What am I going to do," Eric mused, turning away from me again and gazing into the fire which was now only a lightly flickering flame instead of a roaring blaze. "An excellent question." He glanced at me for a heartbeat. "I should bite you. I should drain you and end it, here and now. You are both a vulnerability for me and a threat, a dangerous combination. I should kill you and bring your body to Felipe De Castro and throw it at his feet. I should tell him how you betrayed us by keeping secrets and spying in our minds. It would serve not only to rid me of our bond, but also to prove to the King that my loyalty is above reproach. I have lived too long to take chances with my life now and you have put me in a very difficult situation."

I was shaking. Any warm and fuzzy feelings I had around Eric had vanished quite thoroughly. .

"There are a dozen reasons I should take your life," Eric continued in a detached way. "Every instinct I have tells me what I need to do." He turned to look at me and his eyes were blazing with deep pain. "You are a silver net, weakening me, draining my strength. I should have rid myself of you long ago."

That was a pretty comprehensive explanation and I felt chilled from the inside out. But his words and his actions were polar opposites and I was filled with both dread and utter confusion. He made no move toward me, his fangs were retracted. So was he going to kill me, or not? I really, really hoped not, but I was tired of playing this game. I felt like one of those people in a bad action flick, where the evil arch nemesis takes the time to taunt his victim before doing them in.

"Why haven't you done it already then?" I asked him directly, though my voice was shaking. "Why did you come here tonight and act like you cared anything about me if I'm such a hassle to you?"

"You think my caring for you is an act?" He sounded genuinely offended.

"You hate feeling attached," I continued, ignoring his comment. "Pam told me. And you told me yourself you didn't like having feelings. So why did you even bother giving me blood in Rhodes when you knew we'd have this tie? You were perfectly happy just looking out for yourself, not caring about anyone else and now you've lost that, or so you say. You were strong and focused, and according to what you've said, I've taken that from you, too."

Eric's eyes were blazing hot and wild. "No," Eric told me, his voice clearly angry. He took a deliberate step towards me.

"If I allow something to be taken from me, then I am a coward. If I allow myself to lose something then I am a fool." He took another step, his eyes almost on fire. "When I gave you my blood, I did so willingly. When I swore an oath to risk my life to protect yours, I did so willingly. When I...." he stopped, closed his eyes and seemed to gather himself. "I knew my life would change. I knew I would be bound to you and your life and that I would feel compelled to take risks on your behalf. I knew my independence, as it was, would be tested. I knew the consequences, but make no mistake, Sookie, I chose to make that sacrifice."

"Why?" I breathed, shaken to my core by Eric's admonition. It was the one question I needed answered. The only one that mattered right then.

Eric regarded me for a long moment. "I'm not sure, yet."

Well, there was some brutal honesty back at you, Sookie Stackhouse.

I looked down, feeling the shame creep back up my spine. I hadn't considered the burden our bond had placed on Eric, I had been far too engrossed in my own feelings to see much else. I could add selfishness to my list of accolades. I lifted my eyes back to Eric.

"Is it very hard for you?" I asked. "Our bond?"

"I find myself preoccupied many times. It is one reason I maintained distance from you while I was hosting the King. I couldn't afford any distractions."

"Did that work?"

Eric had a ghost of a smile on his face. "Not as well as I would have liked."

I lowered my eyes again. "I know how you feel," I mumbled and I heard Eric burst into laughter.

"I wasn't trying to make a joke, here," I told him, irritation clawing up my back.

"We are such similar creatures, you and I," he told me, humor still evident in his words.

Now it was my turn to laugh, but just a little. I had a feeling he wasn't talking about hair color and as far as I was concerned that was where out similarities began and ended.

Eric walked over and sat down on the table in front of the couch, directly in front of me, and regarded me for a moment.

"Why did you save me the day the Pyramid was destroyed?"

I felt like I was starting to get whiplash just trying to follow the subject changes.

"What else could I do?" I asked, taken aback.

Eric's brows raised. "You could have run outside to safety like everyone else did that had a chance."

"I couldn't leave you and Pam to die."

"It was a foolish risk. If you hadn't been able to wake me, you would have died that day." He was speaking softly, and I could read nothing from his tone.

"But you did wake up." After some serious screaming and slapping on my part, but whatever worked. He was right, of course. In retrospect it was a pretty stupid thing to do. It was like my whole sense of self-preservation had flown right out the window. (Literally, as it turned out) "But I wasn't the only one taking crazy chances in Rhodes," I reminded him. "I recall a certain vampire trying to take a bomb away from me." I tried to smile a little.

"Unsuccessfully," he said, not sounding happy. "I could list many other incidents in which you and I have taken what could be viewed as suicidal gestures in regards to one another. And now, tonight, you told me - and, though inadvertently, Victor - that you are more dangerous than anyone had realized."

"What's your point here, Eric?" I was feeling exasperated.

"If you and I don't come to an understanding and deal honestly with our tie, one or both of us will eventually end up in a situation that we won't walk away from."

"I think I'm already there," I replied softly.

Eric considered for a moment. "Possibly."

I cringed. "Do you think Victor would really," I could barely put it into words. "Would he really try to turn me? Or will he just kill me?"

Eric leaned back. "Victor has risen quickly through the ranks and make no mistake on this: he has ambition like few others I've ever seen in my long life. As I told you, you are too unique to waste so I doubt he will actually try to kill you. He is good at reining in his temper, especially if he believes you can be of value to him at some point."

He paused, and I could feel something akin to panic begin to bubble up inside me. Eric must have felt it, too, because he changed his tone to something lighter as he continued. "Sookie, I doubt he would make an attempt on you - in any form - anytime in the near future. You are in the King's favor now and the weight of his decrees cannot be underestimated. Also, custom demands that he not attempt to take by force or coercion anything that is..." he paused, and I could have sworn Eric the Viking looked abashed for just a fraction of a second. But then he steadied himself and raised his head marginally. "Anything that is the lawful property of another Vampire."

My eyes went wide and my inner cave woman was ready to break a boulder over Eric's head. So I was Area Five property now. I sighed. Well, I had been called worse. And I couldn't justify being too angry about it since, as twisted as this logic was, it might save me, or at least buy me some time. And I took some comfort in the fact Eric at least had the good grace to realize he was treading on some very non politically correct territory. Old dogs, new tricks. I guess it is possible.

"So I'm safe, then?" I asked, feeling doubtful but hoping.

There was something behind Eric's eyes when he looked at me then. "Oh, no. If Victor goes to the King and tells him you can read Vampire minds, your life would be forfeit. Even if the King decided to keep you on as an asset - and there is no guarantee of that - your gift would eventually be recognized and Felipe De Castro's enemies would seek to strike you down. There is not a vampire in the hierarchy who would tolerate the knowledge that a human could see into their minds, even if only brielfy. We have far too much at stake and too much to hide."

I held my breath. That was exactly what I feared but being proven right gave me no pleasure. I noticed, too, that Eric was very clearly not excluding himself in that statement.

"But," Eric continued, "Victor knows what would happen as well as I do if he told the King, and he is not one to see something destroyed that could be useful to him. Killing you would be a waste of a powerful asset, especially since he is assuming - rightly - that the true scope of your abilities is unknown to others. This gives him an advantage and he will probably seek to keep it until he is in a more powerful position. Or until an opportunity presents itself where he feels he can safely take you."

"Take me?" I repeated, not appreciating the euphemism. "You mean make me a vampire."

"He could make a case for it. After all, he would simply be preserving an otherwise temporary asset, one not easily replaced."

The way Eric was telling me this, without emotion, was disconcerting. I felt uneasy and I was very aware that I was in the presence of an individual whose mind and way of life worked very, very differently than mine.

"He's a monster," I whispered. The very thought of having Victor Madden as my 'daddy' made my stomach churn with disgust.

Eric grew silent for a long few moments. He looked at me carefully. "He wasn't the first to consider such measures, you know."

"What? Who?" I stammered.

Eric raised an eyebrow.

I put my hand on my chest. "You?" Any contrite feelings I had about my mistake earlier dissolved in a rush. I may have been wrong about Eric's intentions tonight, but apparently it wasn't as off the mark as I thought!

"I have lived a very long time, Sookie. I've learned to recognize potential when I see it. So yes, I considered taking you as my own. But," he added quietly, "that was before."

Before what, I wondered?

"And do not forget Andre," he continued.

I shook my head. This was getting to be too much, too fast. "Andre just wanted me bonded to the kingdom. Well, you know that obviously, you were there!"

"I heard what he said to you," Eric replied softly. "Do you recall?"

I thought hard. I had tried so many times to forget that incident that had changed me so dramatically. "He said a lot of things" I answered sadly.

"He said he cared nothing about your plans for the rest of your 'human existence'. His implications were clear to me and I realized his intentions toward you. He would have first forced a blood bond with you and then he would have been able to turn you at his pleasure, whether that be one year or ten years later. I intervened, I did what I could to spare your life." He paused, his eyes far away again. "I used every means at my disposal to keep you safe," he added softly, almost sadly. Every means at his disposal, I thought ruefully. That was spelled F.A.N.G.S.

Okay, this whole night was getting to be a bit too much. I had thought I was going to die, I had spilled secrets and had found out at least three vampires had had designs on making me their vamp child. The only thing left would be a werewolf waiting in my car to bite me.

"So what should I do?" I asked. He had to have a plan. Eric always had a plan.

"I will deal with Victor. I will watch him and try to decipher his plans in regards to you without letting him know that I know." Eric grinned. If there wasn't a physical fight to be had, he would settle for a battle of wits. "He won't come after you directly, not now. You are - and I understand how much you despise the term, Sookie - in my retinue and that is not something even Victor can ignore. You're under my protection, both by custom and by order of the King. Plus, I have a certain Ace in the hole, as well."

I snickered at Eric's use of poker slang. I had no doubt Eric had not only an Ace, but also the whole deck stashed away somewhere.

Eric leaned forward. "Before I return to Fangtasia I will talk to Bill. I won't tell him specifics, of course, but I will let him know he is not to leave the area for his research projects or any other reason until I give clearance. He will be close if you need help. And of course the first thing I will do when I return to Sherveport will be to formally declare you as mine."

I thought I could actually feel my eyes dilate. "Excuse me?" I must have misunderstood.

"I will declare you as mine. Not just as part of my crew, but as my paramour."

I felt my mouth pop open. I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head. I pulled my hands back from Eric's grasp and stood up, walked across the room to give me some space. I turned back to Eric. "Oh no you won't," I told him, putting as much strength behind my words as I could muster. "I am not yours, and I'm certainly not going to be regarded as your whore just because that kind of crap holds some weight with your world."

"Sookie," Eric said firmly, "I know you and I still have things to work out, and we can sort them out in time. But for now, even if for the sake of appearance, it might help."

I held up my hand to stop him before he said anything else. "So you're suggesting I go around acting like your concubine on the off-chance it will stop another vampire from trying to come after me?"

"I understand this might be distasteful to you, but I think you should consider my offer." Eric sounded absolutely cool, like he was negotiating a business deal with a local blood supply chain.

I was ready to go right over the edge, taking sanity with me. This was Eric's big plan? To declare me as his woman, like he was a dog marking his territory? Brilliant.

"Sookie?" Eric prompted, standing up to his full impressive height. I whirled on him.

"Did you know that Bill told me once that if anything happened to him I was supposed to go to you?" I hadn't thought about that in a long while, but it still angered me that he had even suggested it.

Eric's eyes widened. "He told you that?"

"Yes. Like I was incapable of being alone, like I couldn't exist without someone to take care of me." I had flung my arms up as I spoke and Eric was staring at me like I had lost my mind, infuriating me even more.

"Look, I appreciate everything you have done for me. I mean that, sincerely. But this has to stop. I'm not going to get pulled deeper into any more of this vampire crap. I'm not going to role-play as your whore and I'm not going to be viewed as some unique little toy that's kept locked up in a safe until needed. I'm done," I put both up in front of me. "I'm out." Oh yes, I would be calling Niall first thing in the morning.

Eric's eyes turned hard. "We're bound, Sookie."

"Right, I know. You already reminded me of that, quite loudly."

We just glared at one another across the room for a long moment.

"I know you mean what you're saying," Eric said slowly.

"Well of course you do," I muttered sullenly. "I've had your blood, you've had mine. That's where all this mess started."

"Excuse me?" he asked.

"You know when I started hearing vampire minds, Eric? After I'd had blood. Bill told me I needed extra strength because he wasn't sure what you were going to do with me that first time you summoned me to Fangtasia. He told me to take his blood so I did. And voila! I hear you. Then everything was quiet again until after that bullshit in Rhodes. And it could have got me killed at the trial. And now, because of this damned bond that made me all warm and fuzzy I have Victor after me. Everything that happened tonight can be traced right back to you."

I knew it was unfair as soon as I'd said it. It was a nasty and mean and it wasn't even entirely accurate but I couldn't bring myself to care. And why should I? Why should I give a damn about a vampire that had tricked me, and loaned me out to buddies in Dallas and even thought about making me a vampire to preserve my 'usefulness'. No matter what I may feel for Eric, he was still a vampire, a whole different species I would never really understand. The more time I spent with him, the more immersed I became in a world I never wanted to be a part of. There was so little of my life left that I even recognized anymore I would not have the last pieces of it taken away. Eric needed and deserved to know that.

Eric just looked at me for a long while. Emotions flickered across his features too fast for me to follow. I saw anger there, and a hint of sadness, maybe. I recognized confusion and, finally, acceptance. He turned away after a few minutes and walked over to get his jacket. He slipped it on without a word and then turned back to look at me.

"If anything happens to me," he began.

"What?" I asked, cutting him off. "Go back to Bill, right?" Sarcasm practically dripped from the words.

Eric didn't move. "Call Niall. Tell him everything."

Damn right.

Then he turned away from me again and headed for the door.

"Can I ask you one thing?" I called after him and he stopped but did not turn around. "When you were saying you had thought about turning me, what did you mean when you said 'but that was before'?"

Eric stood perfectly still for long enough that I thought he wasn't going to answer. But he did.

"Before I came to the realization that your value was not in your telepathy. It was in your spirit. It was in your bravery and your humor and they way you could feel so fully and with such passion." He paused a moment. "It was in your humanity. I knew then that I could never take that from you."

He opened the door and took one step outside then glanced to the side so I could see his profile. "I will fulfill my obligation to you. If you call on me I will risk my life to save yours." He lowered his head and his voice just a fraction. "Beyond that, I will try not to burden you further."

Then he was gone.

-

_**To be continued**_

*Sorry for the delay in posting! My muse was playing hide-and-seek with me this week. The next installment is almost complete!


	8. Chapter 8

Know Thyself

Chapter Eight

It may have been the first time in my life I truly missed not having another mind intrude on my own. I didn't want to be alone with my thoughts right now. I was desperate for a distraction, anything to keep me from thinking about what had happened tonight, the things that had been done, the things that had been said.

Eric's quiet retreat my house - from my life, really - had left me filled with a powerful combination of emotions and conflicting thoughts. He hadn't been gone long- I could still smell the lingering scent of his cologne in the room - but already I was feeling a curious emptiness. I was ashamed of the things that had passed between us, specifically some of the angry words I had hurled at him. Even on my worst days I never would have thought myself capable of such behavior. And the worst part of all was that I couldn't even bring myself to believe I was in the wrong to speak so bluntly. Eric - well, he hadn't exactly sugar-coated his own words, either. Somewhere in the back of my head I could hear my Grams voice, _Two wrongs don't make a right!_

Okay, I was done thinking about this for now. Picturing Eric's face before he left me, hearing his voice telling me why he wouldn't ever try to turn me....it was gnawing at my heart and I could feel myself already starting to soften. Not good. I couldn't allow myself to become lost in regret or sentiment. I was secure in my decision to disengage from the vampire world and if that meant cutting Eric loose, so be it. I was a mortal woman. Eric's world was not for me. Yes, we were blood bonded and yes, I did care for Eric so there would be pain. But I had to make a clean break. I had to get out while I still had some reasonable chance at having a normal life. I _knew_ I could do this if I just stayed focused. But right now, maintaining that focus was proving difficult with all the crazy emotions whipping around inside me. I needed to _do_ something, I needed a distraction. And I needed a plan. The drama with Eric was secondary to my bigger problem, which was Victor. Despite Eric's allegations that Victor wouldn't come after me, I wasn't completely convinced. And I certainly wasn't comfortable with just sitting back and waiting for Victor to decide my fate. I was going to be a little more proactive than that.

I checked the time and frowned. It was late - well, technically it was early. I had told myself I would call Niall first thing in the morning but that was just the polite human in me talking. I somehow doubted Niall would begrudge me an after-hours call in an emergency. In fact, knowing how eager he was to offer me assistance, I figured he would probably welcome my interruption no matter what the time.

I made my way to the kitchen and flipped on the light. I opened up my address book and turned to the front page where I kept Niall's card. I grabbed up the phone and started to punch in the numbers. Right before I pressed the last digit I hesitated. My finger hovered over the number, but I couldn't bring myself to touch the key. It was like my finger and the phone were similar poles on a magnet, repelling one another. I frowned, hung up the phone, tried again. It was the same result, only this time I couldn't even get past the third number before I had to stop. There was no outside force preventing me from calling Niall, I knew that. There was something else, something coming from inside me but I couldn't imagine what it was.

Calling Niall was the most reasonable option to deal with the Victor problem. Niall was a very magical, very powerful faerie, and he had made it perfectly clear he wanted to help me if ever I desired it. He also wanted to keep me safe. At our first meeting Niall had bluntly offered to kill Eric just to sever the blood bond I had with him. If I told Niall what had happened tonight and what I was afraid of, I had no doubt Victor Madden would be dead before you could say Bibbity-Bobbity-boo. Problem solved.

So what was I waiting for?

I clicked off the phone again and placed it slowly and carefully back in place as an uneasy realization swept through me. What was happening to me? Here I was, about to pick up the phone and basically put a death decree out on another person. Sure, the 'person' in question was a vampire that had a very good reason to want me dead or worse, but still - was this the level I was working on now? I got a quick image of myself in my head: Sookie Stackhouse, mafia faerie princess, calling up her favorite henchfae to carry out preemptive vengeance. Maybe I could add a little wand that I could use as a pointer while I dispensed justice on the masses; _that_ guy lives, _this_ one dies. My will be done!

I tried to find it funny but I couldn't.

And on the heels of that image came a thought even more disturbing. My Great-Grandfather _had_ offered to kill Eric once. He had said it so calmly and easily, like he was asking if I wanted a refill on my water. I thought harder, keeping that chain of thought. There was something there with Niall and Eric, some history of which I was unaware. Niall had told me Eric had been 'useful' to him in the past. Useful - like the vampire was simply a tool in a toolbox. He had approached me through Eric, too, so there was trust there, of sorts, between the two. But then Niall - less than one hour after meeting me - offered to kill Eric if I so wished.

I hadn't been aware of it, but I noticed I had actually taken a few steps back and away from the phone. And I had shut the address book.

What did I really know about Niall? Not much. Less than just about anyone I considered a friend. Far less than Sam and Amelia, even less than Eric. But I had been quick, so quick, to trust Niall. I was thrilled to have family again and he was so sincere- or seemed to be- in wanting to get to know me. I had overlooked his arrogant and casual disregard for Eric's life, justified it, even, because he was family and he just wanted to help me. I hadn't even really thought much about it, until now. And why _was_ I thinking about this now? There was something stirring in my head, some knowledge that was just out of reach.

I turned around, still lost in deep thought, and glanced over to the sink. I was momentarily pulled out of my contemplation when I noticed the little bowl I rinsed off earlier still laying face down in the sink where I had left it. I walked over and picked it up, memories surfacing from just hours before. Eric had brought me grapes in this bowl after my tummy had announced hunger. It had been such an unexpected and sweet gesture. I smiled for a moment but it faded just as fast as I caught myself losing focus again. Think about something else, I commanded myself sternly. I resolutely picked up the little bowl and stashed it away in the cabinet. Out of sight, out of mind.

I turned on my heel and walked out of the kitchen, switching off the light with one hand as I left. I passed the fireplace and glanced at it, noticing the flames had all but died out, leaving a marked drop in the temperature of the room. I made a quick stop at the front door and double checked the locks. Another wave of sadness hit me as I did this. This was the door Eric had bought for me after my last one had suffered death by were-tiger. I reached out and touched it with my fingertips. It was solid, much nicer than the original, and safe. It had dual locks, heavy duty, and both were clamped down tight right now.

I hadn't thought of it at the time, but it struck me now that Eric had ordered this door for me immediately after the Nevada takeover of the state, possibly even the same night since it arrived the very next day. Eric's whole existence had been turned upside down, he was on shaky ground with his new boss but he still took the time to make sure I had new door. I felt a terrible pain in my heart. It was a nice gesture, even if he did owe me. My door would never have been broken in the first place, I reminded myself, if not for my being hauled into the middle of that vampire political mess. And I had been hauled in because I was bonded to Eric. And I was bonded to him because of other vampire political messes and 'round and 'round we go. I pushed away the tug in my heart and reminded myself this was precisely why I needed to get off this ride.

I picked up the near-empty glass that held my now watered down iced tea and brought it to the kitchen and took time to wash it out, dry it and put it away. When I opened up the cabinet I arranged all the glasses, placing them in perfect little rows. It was busy work, ridiculous, but I was trying to occupy my mind with something other than thoughts of Eric. I grabbed the sponge from the sink, dampened it and wiped down the already-spotless counter tops. Maybe Amelia was rubbing off on me. She cleaned when she was stressed (as well as excited, sad and possibly even horny) I was starting to understand the appeal. It was mind-numbing and relaxing in a way.

I glanced at the clock. About fifteen minutes had passed since Eric had left. Was that _all_? It felt like hours. I wished I could just go to bed and lapse into oblivion but I didn't feel the least bit sleepy. My mind was still working like mad, there was no way I was going to be able to turn it off just yet. I needed another way to escape, needed to find something else to do to.

For the second time I headed back into the living room. I looked around, trying to find something to straighten or clean. There wasn't much. Amelia was nothing if not a neat freak and that included the common areas of the house. Oh! My bedroom....that was all mine. Surely there were things in there that needed done! I marched purposefully down the hall and immediately found a distraction. There was a basket of clean clothes sitting by the bed. I had washed and folded them earlier but hadn't put them away yet. I picked up one item, a sweater, and placed it neatly in the proper drawer. Then I got the next item and did the same. Usually I grabbed a whole stack of like items and shoved them all in at once to save time but tonight I wanted to draw it out. I was about halfway through the stack when I heard sudden loud voices coming from back in the living room. I froze for a second, then turned around with eyes wide. Who in the world...

I closed my eyes after a few seconds, shaking my head, berating myself for being startled. I recognized the voices. Scarlet and Rhett. The stupid movie had started up again. I headed back out and stared at the television in confusion. Hadn't the movie been paused? Yes, it had been. But my VCR was so old it acted crazy sometimes. One of these days I was going to have to break down and get a new one. Maybe I'd get one of those DVD/VCR combo units. Jason had switched out all his VHS movies to DVD and he kept telling me I should catch up with the modern world and do the same but I just couldn't see the point in wasting money like that. I smiled grimly at the scene that was playing. I knew it well. Too well. Scarlet was starting her downward spiral at this point in the movie, one of the reasons I had wanted to stop watching it earlier. I loved Gone with the Wind but it was one of those painful-to-watch movies that mixed enjoyment with sadness. She was such an idiot, I thought to myself. Scarlet was so self absorbed she was almost handicapped. And she was enthralled with that sweet but confused soldier, Ashley Wilkes. (the married one that had always made it clear he would never leave his wife) Scarlet had her head and heart so fixed on Ashley she never allowed herself to see how much Rhett truly loved her, how absolutely perfect they were together, until it was too late. Tragic.

I watched the movie for a few minutes, reciting the lines in my head by memory as they were spoken. Another distraction had been found! But soon I felt myself become unaccountably angry. This ridiculous movie had really been the cause of my problems tonight. If I hadn't let Eric talk me into watching it then I wouldn't have become saddened when the movie took it's depressing turn. Eric wouldn't have paused it and we wouldn't have had our chit chat about his life that caused me to feel closer to him. He would never have offered to tell me more stories and I would never have made that crack about being mortal. And we knew how _that_ ended, oh yes. I felt myself start to shake. I walked over to the VCR and hit eject and took out the tape and held it in my hands. I was pretty sure - yes, I hated this movie now. I knew I would never want to watch it again, ever. It would be too much of a reminder of this night. With a rage so sudden and foreign it nearly overwhelmed me I stood up and hurled the tape across the room where it smashed against the wall and fell to the floor in a dozen pieces, leaving an ugly cut in the wall. Looked like I still had some vamp strength left in me. I stared at the mess I had made and decided to let it lay. Screw it. I'd deal with it tomorrow.

I headed back to my room and with a surge of anger-induced adrenaline I finished up with the laundry quickly. I was still fuming at the injustice of it all and paced back and forth, trying to think of more ways to fill my brain. Ah ha, got it! I headed to the bathroom and found the pile of stuff from my purse I had dumped out earlier. My purse was on the floor and the items were scattered all over the counter now. I picked it all up, my hands lingering on the final item - my red cell phone. I needed to charge that, I remembered. I walked to my bed and sat down, picking up the little cord that was plugged into the socket right near the nightstand. I popped it into the phone and sat it down and there it was again - the tug in my heart. Eric gave me that phone as replacement for the one he broke the night of the takeover. He had snatched it right from my hands. I made myself remember how much that had angered me and it helped force the nagging pain from my heart. I was getting better at this, I thought.

My eyes scanned the room for something else to do and I saw a little Christmas gift bag poking out from under my coat, which was in the chair on the other side of my bed. I had completely forgotten I even had this, it had been sitting on that chair for so many days it had become like a fixture of the room. I walked over and retrieved it, pulling out the red and green tissue paper and removing the present inside. Sam always had a little Christmas party at the bar and we did a secret Santa gift exchange this year. I chuckled to myself. Arlene had drawn my name. I know it had to have chapped her butt she had to buy something for me, but I had to give her credit. She had not only picked out an item she thought I would like (though she stayed _well_ within the designated spending amounts Sam had instituted for the event) she had even put it in a pretty bag with all the trimmings. It was a little calendar, similar to my word of the day calendar I liked so much, but this was a 'Quote of the Day' calendar. I had thanked Arlene, even gave her a half-hearted hug that she half-heartedly returned. We played nice at work, out of respect for Sam. I played around with the calendar for a few minutes, flipping through it to my birthday, reading the quote there. It was a funny one and it made me smile. I went to the end and read the one for Christmas Day, which was a bible verse, as could be expected.

I stood up and took the calendar into the bathroom, flipped it open to January 1st (which wasn't quite here yet but almost) and placed it in the corner of the counter at an aesthetically pleasing angle. This was one room I used every day and it was a great place for something like that. I headed back to the bedroom and without thinking I picked up my cranberry coat which was still lying on the chair. Then I stopped. Hadn't I hung my coat up when I got home from work last night? I always put it on the rack when I come in. _Well, obviously you didn't, Sookie, since it's not there!_ I chided myself silently. Whatever. I carried it out to the coat rack by the back door and hung it up and realized, _again_, that this was yet another darn reminder of Eric. Was there nothing in my house that would let me just forget him? My fingers lingered on the coat after I hung it up. It was very pretty, the nicest I had ever had. And very warm. The vampire had good taste, yes indeed.

I stopped myself cold this time. I was done thinking about Eric tonight. I had to get a grip on these emotions. I rarely felt this mentally scattered and I wondered if some of my problem wasn't coming in from the blood bond. Eric hadn't exactly been his usual calm and cool self tonight, and before he left he certainly had quite a few different emotions skittering across his face. Maybe I was getting some residual feedback from him? I wouldn't doubt if that was the case and just thinking about it sent a new wave or irritation through me from head to toe. Blood bond, blood tie, blood noose. It was all about the blood. The red stuff flowing in my veins that was keeping me alive and keeping me shackled to Eric.

I headed back to my bedroom, realizing I was probably wearing out the floor with all this walking back and forth. When had it all started for us, I found myself wondering, this bond I had with Eric? (so much for not thinking about him anymore!) Absently, I started to count all the times Eric had taken my blood. The first time...yes, it was after the Maenad had attacked me and he drank from me to remove the poison. I almost had to laugh; the cocky Viking had even winked at me before he did it. Pure Eric right there. If only I knew then what I knew now - that it would be the beginning of the end of my free will - I may well have let the poison have me! (Okay, not really) Eric had helped to heal me that night so I couldn't honestly get upset about that. And the next time he took a few licks in Dallas while he tended my injuries - that hadn't bothered me either since I knew his saliva would help me heal up faster. And then there was the time when he fed from me after Mickey had hit him with a rock. Eric was at my house at my request that night, so I couldn't begrudge him blood that time, either. And the blood he took during our lovemaking, well I wasn't even going to count that at all because that had been as much for my benefit as his. Just thinking about how it felt when he had bit into my thigh that first time sent a throbbing wave of sheer lust right through my center. I squeezed my eyes shut and sat down on my bed. I would not think about that.

I was doing it yet again, letting my emotional sentiments get the better of me. I needed to rid myself of it, work up some righteous anger, so I thought about the last time Eric had taken my blood. It saved me from Andre, true, but it had bound us together and it was _against my will_. Yep, that did it, always did. The anger was back and once again I was in charge of my feelings. Maybe the trick was to just find a way to stay pissed off all the time. I chuckled. There was a charming idea. Arlene could probably give me some tips.

I stood up and headed into the bathroom to brush my teeth and start getting ready for bed. I still wasn't sleepy but maybe if I went through the motions of my nighttime routine it would help me get there. I was ready for seven or eight hours of escape. I hoped I wouldn't even dream tonight. I picked up the toothpaste and spread it on the brush without really thinking. As I worked on my teeth my eyes drifted over to my new little calendar. What the heck? I spit out the toothpaste and rinsed out my mouth then frowned. Hadn't I just put the calendar to January 1st? I thought I had, but apparently I was having delusions because now it wasn't even close. It was flipped open to August 25th. I picked it up to switch it back to the correct day but as I did so I read the short quote written on that day:

_Search others for virtues, thyself for vices - Benjamin Franklin_

Hmm, hadn't heard that one before. I changed the date back, then splashed some warm water on my face and picked up a towel. I stood straight up, dabbing my face dry as I looked into the mirror and then stopped dead when I caught my own eyes in the reflection. I stood shock still for many seconds, then slowly sat the towel back down, never taking my eyes off the image in the mirror. I didn't recognize the person I saw there. It was me, but it wasn't me. Kind of like the day I had looked at myself in this very mirror and saw myself as Eric saw me. This time I was seeing....well, I wasn't sure. But it wasn't pretty.

I took several steps away from the sink counter until my back hit the wall. Benjamin Franklin had come back from his grave to give me a hard smack and he had brought his lightening rod with him, it seemed. Something akin to a bolt of electricity hit me, illuminating the dark corners of my mind, the places that been hidden from view, and what I found there was beyond horrifying. What was happening to me? I didn't know exactly, but I felt strongly I was on the verge of the most epic Oh Shit Moment of my life.

Sudden realization flooded into me. I had been looking for reasons for distrust Eric. I had cast aside and dismissed his gestures of kindness and caring - his virtues - and I had been quick to judge him for his shortcomings. I raised my hands to my head and thought hard...I remembered just a while ago I had been thinking about Niall and the casual way he talked about killing. It had bothered me, and it had stayed my hand when I was about to call him but I hadn't understood exactly why. Now...I think I got it. Niall was every bit as foreign to me as Eric - maybe more so - but until tonight I had never looked for reasons to avoid my Great-Grandfather the way I had looked for them with Eric. Because Niall was family, maybe? But I didn't think that was it. I knew all too well that family members could hurt you worse than anyone else on the planet if they wanted to. But there I had been, ready to call and ask Niall for his protection after I had just denied Eric the same thing when he was standing right in front of me, _offering_ his help. Was it the vampire in Eric I mistrusted? Or was it something even deeper?

I kind of stumbled out to the bedroom, not really seeing anything, completely engrossed in what I was now convinced was some sort of epiphany. I noticed my cell phone, still charging, and remembered how my first one had been destroyed. I replayed it in my head, seeing Eric snatching the phone from my hands and dashing it against the wall. But this time I didn't get mad, not at all. I ran down the hall, back to the living room. I stopped and stared at the broken remains of the video tape I had destroyed earlier in a fit of rage. I stepped closer and examined the ugly mark I had made when the tape hit the wall. I touched it lightly. Right above it was another cut, smaller but deeper, created when my cell phone made contact months before.

Eric was right, it seemed. He and I were similar creatures.

My gaze traveled around the room and came to rest on the door he had bought for me. Hanging nearby was the cranberry coat. I crossed the room slowly, each step deliberate. I reached out and touched the pretty, warm coat, then the thick, safe door. Warm. Safe. Those were the feelings Eric stirred in me now, the ones I had told him I didn't want because I thought it was just an illusion created by our bond. But it was _real, _so real. It had been right here in front of me the whole time and I couldn't see it. No, that wasn't true. I had refused to see it. It had been easier to blame my feelings on the blood bond. The blood.

I froze again as another memory surfaced in my head. All the times Eric had taken my blood, it had always been for me, for _my_ sake. With the Maenad and in Dallas I had wanted his healing, and in the case of Mickey, I was wanting him to heal up fast so he could help me. It was always about me. But the times he had asked me for blood when _he_ was hurting, when he needed _my_ help, I had denied him. Twice he had taken a bullet meant for me - once when Debbie Pelt shot at me and again when the Were attacked us in the car. The first time I could make a case for not letting him drink from me, since I knew I would be needing all my strength, but the last time I had no excuse. I thought I was being strong, thought I was being tough. I had even wanted to help him, to heal him, but I had clenched my fists and made myself get out of that car. I marched in the house saying 'Hear me roar!' Eric had been in pain and I had refused him just to prove to myself I could.

Something inside me started to break, and I got a brief image of the safety glass at the Pyramid of Gizeh, how it had become a spiderweb of cracked glass but had infuriatingly held together albeit tenuously.

In a moment of clarity like I had never had, I whipped around and looked again at the remains of the broken tape on the floor. Why had I broken the tape of what was a favorite movie of mine, anyway? Where had that violent reaction come from? It's just a _movie_, for heaven's sake! And then I knew. It had all been hitting a little too close to home for me, that's why I destroyed it, why I didn't even want to continue watching it tonight. My subconscious was trying to tell me something but I had refused to acknowledge it, choosing instead to run from it.

Another memory slammed into me. Eric and I in the car on the way home the night I had saved Bill from Lorena. Did I realize, Eric had asked me, that I walked away when things got tough with Bill? He wanted to know for future reference. I had been so irritated by his assumption that he would one day be a romantic partner of mine I hadn't given much thought to the first part of his statement. But I was thinking about it now, oh yes. He had been dead-on right again. I did walk away when things got tough. As recently as this very night I had retreated under fire.I had given up, told Eric I was through, and then spent the rest of my time looking for ways to escape what had happened. I swayed on my feet. I was starting to feel like an punch-drunk boxer on an emotional level. Everyone thought I was tough, Eric had called me brave but I knew right then I was nothing more than a coward. Sure, I could take getting staked, I could kill a vampire ho or face down some Weres and witches but when it came to emotional entanglement I had a yellow streak a mile wide.

And what was I afraid of anyway? I told Eric my free will was being taken away bit by bit. Was that what I was so desperate to protect? If it was, it seemed ridiculous to me now. I had already given that up once before; I had surrendered my will to Eric the night I was staked in Jackson. In my pain and fear I had given myself over to him and he had not let me down. I often wondered if he had managed to glamour me that night. _Look at me, Sookie!_ he had told me over and over until finally I did. He told me to let go and I did. He had somehow taken me away from the unbearable suffering. I had drifted away, knowing I was safe with him. How quick I was to forget.

I realized I had been holding onto ideas of what I wanted my life to be, but maybe what I wanted and what I needed were two different things. I had been afraid of what I was losing and angry about what had already been taken from me. What was that Eric had said about sacrifice earlier? He had experienced the same things I had, but he had simply viewed them differently. He saw his bond with me and the resulting loss of personal independence as a worthy sacrifice, something within his control. I saw myself as a victim. Sweet Jesus, I could learn so much from him, this ancient Viking warrior.

I knew then what I had to do, what I wanted to do. I knew what I needed more than anything else.

The thing inside me that had started to break earlier finally came crashing down in a heap. Just like the glass at the Pyramid had finally given way when Eric and I had combined our strength. We pushed that coffin through the window and by some miracle we managed to survive. With our arms wrapped tightly around one another we had bobbed through the air to safety. I had saved him; he had saved me. Together.

With a rising strength of will, I unlocked both latches on the door as fast as I could and flung it open. I ran onto the porch and barely noticed that the snow had began to fall. Big fluffy white flakes rained down like confetti and I know I would have thought it beautiful at any other time. But I could not be undeterred. I had to find Eric. It was a compulsion I could not ignore, much like the night I had saved him and the King from Siegbert. But this time there was no hesitation in me, no waiting around to decide if what I was feeling was real. I _had_ to do this- not because of the bond, not just because I liked Eric, but because I needed him desperately.

I knew it was a long shot, Eric could be back in Shreveport by now for all I knew, but he said he was going to talk to Bill before he went, so maybe he could still be over there? I could feel him, sort of. The bond was humming away, so he couldn't be far, I thought. I had never actively tried to track Eric, but I knew it was possible since he had found me several times. How long had it been since he left my house? I didn't know, and I didn't care. I was running on a surge of adrenaline fueled by wild desperation as I sprinted down the porch steps and started across the driveway. I was only vaguely aware of the cold gravel digging into my feet as I ran, I barely noticed the cold through my pajamas. I ran, following the little flares of emotions that I recognized as being separate from my own. I ran across the cemetery, feeling my toes sink a bit into the chilled ground with every step. Then about halfway to Bill's house I stopped... something had changed....the pull had altered. Eric was moving, he must be. My heart was pounding in my chest, and I was breathing heavily. Where is he where is he where is he? A quick flash of emotion washed over me but it wasn't mine. I concentrated heavily and got a very vague sense of the direction of that flash, or so I hoped. I really had no idea what I was doing, I was working on pure instinct. I changed direction and ran off toward the main road. Eric was flying, so he had no need to follow the normal routes back to Shreveport, but I was hoping against hope he was close enough that he could hear me or feel me or something.

"Eric!" I screamed as I ran. "Eric!" I got all the way to the road, paused to get my bearings then took off again. I was calling to Eric, both out loud and through our bond, though I wasn't really sure either was very effective. Or maybe he did hear me and simply didn't have any desire left inside him to answer me. That thought seemed to sap the last ounce of energy out of me and my stamina finally began to wane. I slowed down, first to a jog, then to a walk and finally I stopped, my chest heaving with exertion, my hair damp with snow. "Eric," I said once again, in a choked whisper.

I looked around after a few minutes, realizing with a start that I had come much farther than I thought. The snow had gotten heavier and it had started to accumulate, though just a little. Sprouts of green and brown mixed with white covered the ground, and now that my adrenaline was no longer coursing through my veins I felt the sharp sting of cold on my bare feet and in my hands and in my cheeks. I flexed my fingers over and over again, trying to keep the blood moving so I could warm up. I looked around, reaching out, trying to find some sign - any sign - of Eric. There was nothing but a terrible and brutal silence. Sadness threatened to overwhelm me, and anguish. How could I have let this happen? I was just like Scarlet, I lamented. I had found the one person in the whole world that saw me exactly as I was and cared for me anyway. And like Scarlet I hadn't realized what I had until it was gone. I stood in the falling snow, feeling as alone as I'd ever felt in my life. Eric was gone. I had lost him.

I fell down on my knees at the side of the road and despair took me.

-

_To be continued_

_Thanks so very much for all the kind comments! They have definitely helped to keep me motivated! xoxo  
_


	9. Chapter 9

Know Thyself

Chapter Nine

_Get up, Sookie! You have to get up!_

I'd been telling myself that for many minutes and, finally, I decided to obey.

I leaned forward from my knees and placed both my hands face down on the cold, snow covered ground and pushed. My knees were wet and numb, the snow having soaked easily through my pajamas while I cowered on the side of the road awash in guilt and pain and not a little self-pity. There was a moment there when I really thought I might just lay down and give up, but it was only a moment. I knew I needed to find Eric, needed to talk to him and make things right between us, if I could. But I knew that would be hard to do if I froze to death - and if I didn't pull myself together and get home soon, that was a very real possibility. I was shivering as I never had before, my stomach was clenching with spasms and my teeth felt like they were going to crack from the chattering.

I stood up slowly, feeling every muscle in my body wail in protest as I did so. I took a few steps and winced as pain shot straight up through my bare feet and into my legs. I pulled down the sleeves on my pajama top as far as I could, trying to cover up my hands that were stinging with the bite of the wind. I still couldn't believe how far I had run trying to catch up with Eric; it had to have been half a mile! I hadn't even felt the cold then, focused as I was, but I was sure feeling it now. I tried to rally myself, but it was agonizingly difficult. The huge chip that had been sitting on my shoulder for so many months hadn't disappeared, but it seemed to have changed locations. I felt like there was an enormous weight sitting right smack dab in my chest, crushing my heart.

I did a kind of dance, raising one foot for a few seconds, then switching to the other, trying to get some feeling back in my feet. I started to walk, every step excruciating. The snow was thicker now and the moon was only a sliver in the sky, but I had lived here all my life and I knew my way home even in the dark. I thought about sticking to the road until I hit my drive but decided it would be faster to cut back the way I came. It was a fine plan until one nearly frozen foot stepped down on a jutting rock the wrong way and down I went like a sack of potatoes. I fell forward, catching myself with my forearms just before my face hit the ground. Ouch.

I hadn't broken anything, nothing was injured that would prevent me from walking but I just lay there on my stomach in the snow, cold and sore and alone and completely infuriated at myself for more than just temporary clumsiness. I slapped my hand on the ground a few times and felt tears of pure frustration well up. Great, that was just what I didn't need. I was going to have icicles on my face, I just knew it. With effort, I squeezed my eyes shut and forced the tears back. I was done crying tonight.

I hauled myself up once again and brushed off the snow from my pajamas as best I could. I started walking again, more carefully this time. I was counting my steps to keep my mind off the pain. I got to a hundred and started counting again, this time adding a little nursery rhyme. One two, buckle my shoe, three four shut the door. I giggled a bit, I felt so silly. I kept my head down, trying my best to block the wind, and noticed my newly painted toenails were already looking a little rough. I'd have to redo them I thought, feeling strangely amused. Five six, pick up sticks. I risked a glance up to make sure I was heading in the right direction. The snow was making pretty little designs in the limbs of the trees. It was so beautiful and I had to stop and just appreciate it for a minute. We rarely got to see this kind of thing in Louisiana. I should take a picture, I thought absently. As I started walking again I got the impression that maybe it was starting to warm up; I wasn't as cold anymore and my feet were moving a little faster now. I wasn't exactly going in the straightest of lines, but from what I could tell but I was heading in the right direction. I would be home soon, and I would start the fire again and I would warm up and I would call Eric. He would take my call, right? Oh please let him take my call! Seven, eight, lay them straight.

The wind whipped my hair into my face and I reached up to brush it back with my hand and missed. I giggled. That was so weird. I tried again and came closer that time. What was wrong with me? My breathing was speeding up and I was feeling very tired. Maybe if I just sat down for a few minutes it would help. I found a tree and leaned up against it, laid my head on the trunk and closed my eyes. My shivering was almost like convulsions now, but I didn't mind. It was working, I was definitely feeling warmer. Wish I wasn't so tired, though. I slid down the tree and squatted on the balls of my feet and let my head fall forward onto my crossed arms. It must be late, I was so sleepy. Nine, ten, do it again...

"Sookie."

My eyes fluttered open. Someone said my name, right? I raised my head and it bobbed just a little. I struggled to focus, and saw I wasn't alone. Could anyone look more like an Archangel, I wondered, when I saw Eric standing there tall and strong in the falling snow, his face slightly glowing as it always does. He came back to me, I thought rosily. My heart pounded and I opened my mouth to speak but I couldn't get out a word through my chattering teeth. I wanted to reach out for him, I wanted to wrap my arms around him and tell him how sorry I was for what happened earlier, but my arms felt like they were made of lead.

Eric looked at me a long time, and it wasn't a happy look, not at all. He walked towards me, frowning, pulling off his jacket. He knelt down in front of me and his eyes were like ice shards when they found mine. He reached out and I felt his jacket being pulled around my shoulders. Then in one swift movement he bundled me up in his arms and stood. My head fell on his chest and I gazed up at his face. I'm so sorry, that's what I wanted to say.

"I'm s-s-s.." was all I managed to squeak out. Eric looked down at me with an unreadable expression but didn't speak. He held me tightly and I felt a strange sensation, felt wind on my face and the legs of my pajama bottoms were fluttering against my ankles. We were flying.

It seemed like no time at all before were were back at my house. Eric walked us onto the porch and opened the back door I didn't remember shutting. He brought me into the living room and sat me gently on the chair nearest the fire - the fire that was going at full blaze once again. So strange.

Eric paused and I saw his nostrils flare out and he tensed, looked around. He relaxed after a moment, removed his jacket from my shoulders and tossed it on the couch, exchanging it with the warm blanket I had covered up with earlier. Then he disappeared and I panicked for a moment. He couldn't leave me yet, I needed to talk to him! I was still beyond the ability to speak, though I tried to call out to him. I attempted to pull the blanket around myself more tightly but my fingers wouldn't cooperate.

I heard movement down the hall and Eric appeared with a white towel from the bathroom. He came over to me and put the towel over my damp hair, dried it for a minute and without a word he left again. I heard noise, this time from the kitchen. Cabinets were opened, water was running. The fire was feeling so good and I felt the shaking starting to subside, though I was still numb and stiff. When Eric returned he had a little basin of water and a cloth. He knelt down in front of me on one knee, and rolled up the legs on my pajamas, which were wet and dirty. He placed the basin on the floor and I saw the water was tinged with red. He lifted up my feet to place them in the water and for the first time I noticed they were cut and bloody as well as covered with dirt. The water stung a little though it was barely lukewarm, but I didn't even think about protesting. I watched in amazement as Eric wet the cloth and starting bathing off my feet. I saw nearly-healed fang marks on the inside of his right wrist as he dipped the cloth back in the reddish water and twisted it out over and over while he cleaned me. He was silent as he did this and kept his eyes on his work. He was detached and almost clinical, but gentle. It wasn't long at all before I was cleaned up, mostly dry and feeling a hundred times better. At least physically.

Eric removed the basin and pushed it aside while I reached up and pulled the towel from my head. My fingers were working again. Eric looked up at me and our eyes met. There was so much I wanted to tell him but right at that moment all I could think of was putting my arms around him and never, ever letting go. I didn't think that would be appreciated at the moment, though; Eric was still looking decidedly unhappy.

"Thank you," I told him finally, wishing my voice was stronger.

He just glared at me for a good while with that intense gaze I had become uncomfortably familiar with. "Nothing you haven't done for me," he said, then stood up, unsmiling.

"I'm so sorry," I breathed, looking up at him with pleading eyes. I hoped he would say something, anything, even if he yelled at me it would be better than silence.

"I don't want an apology," he told me in a neutral voice. "I knew you might come to hate me."

I shook me head. "But I don't! What I said earlier, I didn't mean it. I don't blame you. Eric..." I trailed off when his face closed down.

He crossed his arms across his chest and looked down. "What were you running from just now?" he asked, not looking up.

"Nothing," I said softly. "I was trying to find you. I had to talk to you. I couldn't let you leave like that."

Eric's head snapped up and he looked at me with fury. "And for that you decided to risk your safety? You were in stage one hypothermia when I found you, well on your way to stage two, did you realize that?"

My eyes went wide and I shook my head. "How do you know?"

He raised an eyebrow. Oh, right. Viking.

"You could have simply called me," he said. There was still anger in him, it was bubbling just under the surface and I could hear it in his voice.

I looked down, embarrassed. "I wasn't thinking that clearly, I guess."

"So it seems," he said quietly.

We stayed like that for a long minute, the only sound between us the pops and cracks in the fire. He was being so cold - not that I could blame him- but it made it hard for me to rally some of my earlier confidence. I inhaled, held it, exhaled.

"It wasn't the bond," I blurted out all at once, and Eric's brows creased together. "In Rhodes, when I came to find you. It wasn't just because of the blood tie." I watched Eric's face closely, and it seemed like his hardened expression relaxed a bit, but it may have been wishful thinking on my part. "You were right. It would hurt me if you died, very much." It was hurting me just to say the words now. "After you left earlier - and I don't blame you at all for walking out - I started to think about things, about us. I didn't even want to think about anything, and I was trying not to, but I couldn't help it." I knew for a fact I was babbling at this point, but I also knew if I stopped I'd lose my nerve so I plowed on.

"You scare me sometimes. I don't know what's going on in your head and there are times you say things and do things that I don't understand and some of them infuriate me. But there are plenty of times I love being around you, too. And you've done a lot for me, helped me out with things I needed. You've cared for me and you have always liked me just as I am. And I've always felt safe around you, even before the blood tie."

I paused to take a breath and Eric's expression had for sure changed this time. Not angry anymore- bewildered perhaps? I kept going. "But the thing is, what I realized, is that I've been constantly reminding myself of all the things about you that frighten me and make us different. And when I start to remember the other things, the things I really, really like about you, that's when I try to get away. Or I push you away." I lowered my voice but forced myself to look Eric in the eyes. "Or I just blame it on the blood bond so I don't have to deal with it." I held his eyes. "But I'm done running and...well, that's what I had to tell you."

There was an uncomfortable silence after I (finally) stopped talking. I couldn't get a thing from Eric's face and I felt like something big was hanging in the balance. I had just put myself out there and now came the waiting. It hadn't been the most articulate explanation, I knew, but it was the best I could do in the middle of the night after too many upheavals.

As the silence dragged I became more and more fearful that Eric was about to pull a Rhett '_I don't give a damn'_ Butler move. It was a crushing thought. I was powerfully and acutely aware of my need to have Eric in my life. It was so bizarre how this one desire was driving me now when I hadn't even acknowledged it's existence until possibly an hour ago. My epiphany (or whatever is was) had opened up a floodgate of new and long buried emotions and I wanted to share it all with Eric, but he was still very clearly in the not-sharing type of mood.

"I'm too late, aren't I?" I asked him quietly, feeling my stomach twist with dread. It seemed an eternity before he answered and when he did, he had a faint ghost of a smile.

"I have waited hundreds of years for you. Do you really think a few short months more would try my patience?"

Alrighty, not what I was expecting but I was okay with that. Did that mean I was forgiven? I smiled up at him, but then his face locked down again and he became serious.

"Am I right in assuming you are prepared to deal with our situation now?" he asked me directly.

Our situation? That was one way to put it, I suppose. "Yes, I think so," I answered slowly.

He was in front of me in a flash, kneeling on one leg, his eyes blazing. "Not good enough, Sookie. You cannot just think you're ready. There can be no halfway on this. Too much is at stake for self doubt and second guessing."

Something in his voice made me take pause, but not for long. Things had gotten completely out of hand between us and needed to be put back to rights. The inexplicable events and resulting destruction of my self-made delusions was forefront in my head.

"Tell me what I need to do," I told him in a steady voice.

"You care for me?" he asked.

"Yes."

"Because of the bond?" his eyes narrowed slightly.

"No," I said weakly, then sat up a little straighter and tried to summon up a stronger voice. "No, it's not just because of the bond. I cared for you before Rhodes, and if this tie we have unravels tomorrow I know I would _still_ care for you, very much."

"Do you want me as part of your life?" This he asked very slowly.

"Yes," I said. "I need you," I added in the faintest of whispers.

Eric searched my eyes for a long while then seemed to relax, his shoulders dropped and he leaned away from me a fraction. "Certainly took you a while to figure that out."

I looked down at hands in my lap, feeling chastised. "Too long."

I felt his hand lift my chin so he could see my face. "I feel the same about you," he told me gently.

I felt myself start to smile as knots of tension began to loosen inside me, but one look at Eric's face told me not to get ahead of myself. He raised his head a fraction.

"But we _are_ bound in blood," he began, his eyes never breaking contact with mine. "I don't take that lightly and neither can you. There is a magic at work between us now that is not easily broken."

I choked back a little giggle. "Magic?" I asked, and I know I sounded amused. Eric was not.

"Call it what you will. The same magic, the power that keeps me functioning without a heartbeat, that prevents me from entering a mortal's home uninvited, that makes me sense the dawn - this is inside you, too, just in a different form. You must respect it and learn how to use it. For both our sakes."

"I'm not sure I'm understanding," I said slowly. "I can always feel you when you're around, is that what you mean? And when you say use it... should I learn how to track you? I was trying to do that before. I don't think I'm very good at it."

Eric smiled. "Those are the basic attributes of a common blood bond, yes. But we have something different, something stronger."

I looked at him closely. "What makes you think so?"

"Because this is much more powerful than anything I have felt before."

My eyes went wide. "You've had a blood bond before?" I felt a little hurt, honestly, and I realized the absurdity of it. How protective I'd become of something I didn't even admit to wanting when I woke up this morning!

"I've been bonded many times," Eric continued. "As I told you before, it was helpful in the past, when we lived in secrecy, to have a human and sustain that person. That meant giving blood if they became sick or injured. Plus it gave us the advantage of knowing what the human was feeling so we could sense betrayal or danger, or to make them submit to our call. It's also why humans were drained when their usefulness had run out. We didn't want any type of connection to remain, no matter how slight. Most all vampires have formed blood bonds with humans at one time or another, it's nothing new."

I leaned back in the chair like the wind had been knocked out of me. "Okay, then why is everyone making such a big deal about us? Quinn..." I hesitated. Not tactful to bring up one former flame in front of another, right? Couldn't think about that now. "He was really upset about it. Well, I guess he would be. But even the King said it was interesting! If it's such a dime-a-dozen thing, why the interest?"

Eric seemed to gather his thoughts before answering. "Because in most blood bonds there is not an emotional connection, at least not for the vampire. It's just a tie made from necessity or a desire to control another. I told you how humans have been viewed in the past."

I grimaced. I remembered our McPeople conversation all too well.

Eric continued. "It is different with you and I because there is a real attachment between us, and real emotions. It makes our bond stronger in a way rarely seen. It can be very useful, Sookie. The King recognized the intensity of our relationship when you came back for me when I was attacked. It's nearly unheard of for a human to be so closely attuned to a vampire, even with a blood bond in place. That impressed him nearly as much as your bravery."

I pushed my hair back. "So why didn't you bother to tell me any of this before?" Irritation was nipping at my heels but I struggled to quash it. I was in information overload here but I needed to hear this.

Eric placed his hands over mine. "You weren't ready."

"What does that mean?" Irritated now, for sure.

Eric smiled at me again. "What point would it have served to tell you our blood bond was only as strong as it was because we had feelings for one another? Would you have believed me? Or would you have dismissed it and assumed it was the bond itself creating the feelings?"

Okay, good point. Would I have believed it? If I was being honest I would have to say probably not.

"I'm not sure," I answered, and even to my ears it sounded pretty pathetic.

Eric chuckled. "You had to figure it out for yourself, just as I did. And don't feel bad. I have been around a lot longer than you and it still took me a good while to accept the situation. I spent many months trying to disengage myself from you. I knew what it would mean for me if I continued to allow myself to harbor inappropriate feelings for a human."

"Caring about me is 'inappropriate'?" I asked with a touch of accusation.

"For a vampire like myself who wishes to survive, yes. You are mortal. You are short lived and fragile and can be all too easily damaged or killed. To care for you means I have to be on constant guard. You could be used as leverage against me, and I am already a target of sorts because of my position as Sheriff. I have never permitted myself such a vulnerability."

No, of course he wouldn't. I considered his predicament carefully. I knew what it felt like to be a target, even though my own experiences were a little different. But it was a terrible thing to know there was someone out there that wanted - and could - do you harm. This was Eric's reality and it made me unaccountably miserable for him. He had packed on one more burden when he decided to bind himself to me. I was forever in some kind of trouble and Eric was forever having to rescue me, many times at his own peril. Of course, I reminded myself, I had also saved his fanged tail a few times, too. Also at my own peril. We must be nuts.

"You're crazy," I told him, and he surprisingly laughed out loud.

"Possibly."

"So what do we do now?" I asked him.

Eric stood up and crossed the room, turned back to me and he was all business again. "First, you must understand that you cannot keep secrets from me, not when it involves something as important as what I found out tonight. If you are in danger, then I am as well, and I do not enjoy being in danger." He smiled ruefully. "When I don't know about it, at least."

"No problem there," I told him sullenly. "I'm fresh out of big secrets."

"And you must not fear me," Eric stated, his eyes hard. He was choosing his words carefully, dropping contractions again. "I will not hurt you; I could no more inflict harm on you than I could myself. If you harbor fear for me in your heart then you will not be able to trust me. And Sookie, I need you to trust me if we are going to be bound this tightly. It's essential."

"I do," I told him automatically though he gave me a dubious look. "I do trust you. What is it you're wanting me to do anyway?"

Eric took a step towards me, his eyes glowing. "You have to learn how to hear my call."

"Hear your call?" I repeated, not a little shocked. "You mean the way a vampire maker can call to their child?"

Eric nodded. "Similar, yes."

"You know that won't work with me." I was immune to vampire influence and for that I was grateful beyond words.

"It can work if you allow it." He sounded pretty darn certain.

I shook my head. "No, it won't. And I'm not sure I would even want to try. I don't like the idea of vampires being able to control me."

"It would only be me, Sookie," Eric said softly. "And I wouldn't call it control."

I snorted. "Call it anything you want, I don't like it. I don't want to heel."

"You said you trusted me," Eric stated, his gaze boring right through the back of my eyes.

"Would you want that?" I asked him directly, going on the offense. "Would you want me to be able to influence you or call you or whatever?"

Eric raised a corner of his mouth in a half grin. "You have no idea how much you already do."

"I'm serious," I said, frustrated.

"So am I," he replied, but then his smile faded. "You let me into your head once before, do you remember? If you can let me in once I know you can learn to do it again."

I furrowed my brow, thinking back, then gasped. "In Jackson?" I asked and he nodded. "You glamoured me, didn't you?" I stood up and stared at him with my mouth open. I knew it. I _knew_ I hadn't just passed out from drugs and agony that night!

Eric looked at me thoughtfully. "I didn't enjoy seeing you in pain. You let me in, but it was a struggle. You're a stubborn woman." I'm glad he wasn't smiling at least.

"What did you do? And for how long?" I felt my voice raising. I wasn't thrilled with the idea that a piece of my life had been erased for good.

"I made you forget the pain, that's all. I convinced you you weren't hurting." He shrugged. "As to how long- ten minutes, maybe fifteen. Only until the wound was cleaned and you were safely in bed. I released you after everyone left."

My eyes popped. "You _released_ me?"

"Would you rather I hadn't?" He wasn't understanding my reaction at all, I could tell.

"How long could you have kept me like that? Hypnotized?" I was outraged, and grateful and morbidly fascinated all at once.

"Once I had you under my influence...indefinitely, I suppose." He was way to matter-of-fact for my taste.

I plopped back down in the chair. I had suspected, yes, but having it confirmed was very disconcerting. I tried to remember. I remembered that vamp pulling the stake out and sucking the wound, Eric was demanding me to look at him and I was screaming and then....nothing. I woke up in my underwear under the blankets. _With Eric_. I snapped my eyes back to him.

"Tell me you didn't!"

Eric knew exactly what I was asking. "Of course not," he told him immediately, then grinned like a Cheshire Cat. "I'm not saying there wasn't a few minutes there when I didn't think about it, but no. I knew you would yield to me eventually, and I wanted you to remember it when you did." He paused, then shook his head, looking unhappy. "Ironic that I was the one that ended up not remembering."

I put my hand over my mouth to stifle a giggle. Another time I might have been furious about knowing Eric had glamoured me, but not tonight. All I could think of was that Eric had cared enough for me to take me away from the worst pain of my life. And even though he could have been otherwise, he had been a perfect gentlemen afterward. Or as perfect as I could expect out of him, in any case. Plus I understood a little of why his lost memories had so infuriated him. I was annoyed about losing ten minutes!

I pushed all that aside and got back to the conversation at hand. Eric wanted me to let him into my head.

"Can I have some time to think about this...about the learning to hear your call thing?" I asked, feeling almost apologetic. I didn't think Eric would do anything to harm me, but the thought still made very uneasy. If I dropped my guard for Eric, would I also be dropping it for everyone else, too? I had been bombarded with way too much information tonight. I was going to have to take a day or two or three and sort through it all.

Eric didn't speak for a minute. "Think quickly. Now that we've come to an understanding of sorts about where we stand personally, we need to consider the other matters." Right. Like Victor. I had nearly forgotten about him. Not a smart thing. Eric went on. "Things can move fast in my world. If I need to reach you quickly, having an open channel would be an enormous asset. It has been invaluable with Pam."

I nodded and we looked at one another for a long moment. I imagined I still looked pretty pitiful sitting there in my dirt stained pajamas with the legs pulled up around my calves and my hair a little fluffy from being air dried. I raised a hand and made an attempt to smooth it.

"You're always beautiful," Eric said softly, as though he knew exactly what I was thinking. I couldn't help but smile.

"I should let you get some rest," he told me after a moment. "It's late and it's been a long night." He walked over to the couch and grabbed up his coat. "If you're agreeable I would like us to talk again tomorrow, though I'm not sure I will be able to get away from Shreveport. I have some tactical maneuvering to do." He smiled a bit in anticipation; Eric was all about the battles, even the stealth ones. "Bill will be close if you need anything and I may send Bubba to keep watch on you as well. If any of your neighbors have pet cats they are especially fond of you might want to let them know to keep them inside for a while."

A terrible wave of pain hit me when I saw him start to pull on his jacket. Without conscious thought, I found myself on my feet in a second, panicked. Eric looked at me and froze when he saw my face, having only gotten one arm through the jacket sleeves. I felt my heart beating like butterfly wings.

"I don't want to be alone," I told him, and I didn't think I had ever spoken words more true. He didn't respond, just seemed to search my face. I took a step toward him, then stopped, gathered my resolve. "Will you stay with me tonight? At least as long as you can?"

He knew exactly what I was saying and there was a time Eric probably would have broken into a touchdown dance hearing those words. But I knew without a doubt that wouldn't be the reaction tonight. And it wasn't.

"Sookie," he said in an oddly tender voice, "I want you to be sure of what you want from me. If you're worried about your safety, there is no need. I won't allow anyone to harm you in any way if it's within my power to prevent it, I promise you. You don't need to do this to gain my loyalty. You already have it. No matter what our relationship, I will always take care of you."

I smiled slightly. "I know you will. And that's exactly why I'm asking you now." I reached my hand out to him. "Will you stay with me tonight?"

And I didn't need to ask him again. His coat fell off his arm and onto the floor and in a few long strides he was in front of me and our eyes met for a long moment. Then his lips were on mine and his arms were pulling me against him. I reached my hands up to his shoulders and then slid one around and stroked his neck as our kiss deepened. I was flooded with warmth and safety and for once I allowed myself to enjoy it fully, drown in it.

Our lips parted after a few succulent moments and Eric stepped back a bit, cupping my face in one big hand. I turned my head slightly and kissed his palm, my eyes closing in bliss. Then Eric reached down and picked me up with a big sweeping movement. He kissed me again and again, lightly, as he turned and carried me down the hallway to my bedroom.

He smiled down at me. "Scarlett and Rhett?" he asked, his eyes dancing.

I stroked his face, grinning back at him. He finally got the joke.

_To be continued.... _


	10. Chapter 10

Know Thyself

Chapter 10

It didn't take me long to realize that even the most treasured and vivid memories pale in comparison to the real thing.

Being in Eric's arms, feeling his hands and mouth on my body, was nothing short of exquisite. He had carried me to my bedroom and had let go of me only long enough to pull back the covers. He was now sitting on the edge of my bed and I was standing in front of him as he ran one hand underneath my pajamas, caressing my back, while he deftly popped open the buttons of my shirt with his other. He was working slowly, savoring and kissing the bare skin that was exposed little by little with each button that came undone.

I watched him, as I knew he would want, and I ran my hands along his arms and shoulders, my breathing already a little ragged. I moved my fingers to his hair and slid off the dark band that held the intricate braid in place. The braid was already mostly frayed after the events of the evening, but I found I had a powerful desire to rid him of that insignificant little band anyway. I wanted absolutely nothing between us.

I worked my fingers through his now completely loose hair and pulled him closer to me with a little sigh. He nuzzled his face into my breast, kissing and teasing, and his free hand moved down my back and glided over my bottom. He pulled a little too hard on the last remaining button on my top and it came off into his hand. He raised his eyes to mine and they were dark with desire. He dropped the little button to the floor and slid my shirt off my shoulders, pulling me to him, his hands running up my sides, making me shudder.

"I owe you some new pajamas," he said in a quiet, teasing voice. When he smiled at me I saw just how much he was enjoying our contact. Keeping my eyes on his, I knelt down in front of him on the floor and started to work on getting his own shirt free from his body. It didn't take long. I ran my hands up and down his perfect chest and leaned forward to flick my tongue on his right nipple. I felt him wrap his hands in my hair and an appreciative groan rumbled deep in his chest. I reached down and started to work on his jeans, which were definitely being tested. He _would_ have to be wearing a belt!

"Forget the pajamas," I whispered. "I think I'll just take the payment in trade."

Eric became suddenly still and he reached down to grasp my wrists. I looked up and was surprised to find a serious expression on his face.

"Sookie," he said in a no-nonsense tone, "You shouldn't want me to have sex with you just because I owe you."

I stared at him for a long moment and he didn't move. But then his eyes lit up and a tiny smirk curved on his lips. I forced back a giggle, recognizing my own words from long ago being repeated back to me. I went back to the business of getting him free of his pants. Two could play this game. I stood up and he let me push him back onto the bed. I used one arm to cover my bare breasts, feigning modesty, and with my free hand I grabbed the end of his now unbuckled belt and quickly pulled it off; it made little snapping sounds as it came free of all the loops in his jeans. I held it up for dramatic emphasis and then tossed it onto the floor. I leaned forward and ran my hands up Eric's thighs, holding his eyes.

"I really don't care why you have sex with me," I purred, "As long as you do it."

With that, Eric growled and reached up and grabbed me under the arms, and in one swift motion I found myself on my back in the bed. Eric was nibbling my ear and my neck in between kisses. He was holding himself on one elbow and his free hand was gliding down my tummy and continuing south. I sighed deeply. I had forgotten how long his fingers were.

It wasn't long at all until Eric had divested me - and himself - of our remaining clothes. He moved down the length of my body slowly, kissing and stroking and licking until I felt like I was ready to burst into flames. I was nearly insane with wanting him but I knew Eric was a most generous lover (in all regards) and he would not rush, especially tonight. He seemed to be enjoying my pleasure greatly. Eric started making his way back up my body, he found my mouth again and we just kissed for a while, over and over. I could feel him, very ready, pressing against my leg, but he made no move to enter me. He was taking his time, maybe enjoying and committing to memory every single sensation, just as I was.

Somewhere in the fuzzy haze of passion I realized he had not yet drawn my blood, though there was no doubt he desperately wanted to. I found I could actually feel his need and his want, and with a little bit of surprise, I also felt my own very similar desires. I lifted my hands and gently pushed Eric's head aside so I could kiss him just under his ear, down his throat. He let me do this and I felt him shudder as I trailed my mouth across his shoulder.

"I want you," I whispered, closing my eyes and pressing my face against his skin, breathing in his scent.

"Oh, you will have me, my lover," Eric replied huskily. His fingers were gently moving in little circles down below and I found it nearly impossible to form the words I wanted to say.

"No," I groaned. "I want all of you." I opened my mouth a little and let my teeth drag across his skin just a bit so he would understand what I meant.

Eric stopped moving and I raised my eyes to his. I wondered briefly if my own expression was as lust filled as his. I was sure it was.

"Eric," I said quietly. With that one word, I was telling him I wanted to have his blood. Not because I was injured and needed it, not because I was being tricked or forced, but because I cared for him, trusted him. I was telling him I _wanted_ to be bonded to him, and him to me. My desire for him at this moment was absolute. I wanted desperately to keep part of this magnificent creature inside me, always.

Eric closed his eyes tightly for a few moments, whispered something that sounded almost reverent in a language I didn't recognize, then opened his eyes and reached up to stroke my hair back, kissing me delicately on the forehead.

"Sookie," he whispered, and that one word told me everything I needed to hear.

I turned my mouth back to his shoulder and kissed it. He was strong and solid, and I loved the way his muscles worked under his skin. I reached my hand around and under his arm and held him tightly. Then I bit hard and I heard Eric moan long and deep.

I closed my mouth over the wound and tasted the sweet and thick blood that was all Eric as it flowed between my teeth. My eyes fluttered shut as I drank him into me and I felt Eric lift my free arm over my head. He kissed the inside of my wrist several times and I felt a small pain as his fangs pierced my flesh. I made a noise of pleasure as he drew on the wound, and I sucked hard on his shoulder. And then, as happened once before, I was assailed with visions.

_I saw myself clawing out of the ground in a barren and frozen wasteland. I saw jagged rocks and chunks of ice jutting up from the earth, and I saw deep craters scar the land. I saw myself lost there, and alone. I saw snow begin to fall, lightly at first, then more and more until finally I found myself surrounded by a storm of white flakes that enveloped my vision. Then the blizzard changed and became rain, melting the snow, creating a terrible fast moving river all around me. The water got higher and higher until I was swept away, and I crashed against the sharp rocks, one after another, and I began to bleed. My blood poured into the river, turning the water red. I was carried off along the river of blood and I saw one of the giant craters in the earth directly in my path. Then I was falling, falling and I had a moment of terror as I spiraled into the depths. But then I found myself being held by invisible hands and flying up and away, back to safety..._

The visions suddenly ended and I was back in The Moment. Eric's lips were on mine, and we were kissing one another with a wild hunger. I could taste my own blood mingling with his. He reached down and hitched my leg up around his hip and I molded myself against him. I couldn't get close enough to him fast enough and he was certainly feeling the same way. He moved over me, positioning his body to take me fully. He broke off our kiss without warning, leaving me gasping. He gazed into my face and I understood he wanted to be looking in my eyes when we finally joined. A belated awareness suddenly hit me and I felt my body tense.

Eric's eyes widened. "What's wrong?" he asked me softly and I immediately shook my head to belay any fears. I put my hands on either side of his face and I looked up at him with wonderment.

"Nothing," I said. "Everything is very right. I just realized....that this will be the first time I've made love to_ you_."

Eric searched my face for a long moment, then a slow smile spread across his face and his eyes flashed. His lips hovered just over mine when he replied.

"Then I will have to make certain it's memorable."

And he did.

-

_To be continued_

_(Sorry, this one was a wee bit short. Probably should label it Chapter 9.5!)_


	11. Chapter 11

Know Thyself

Chapter eleven

Time had passed far too quickly.

Eric and I had shared pleasure (more than once) and now I was lying beside him, my head tucked comfortably into the nook of his arm and shoulder. I had one arm lying on his chest, absently twirling a finger into the soft, curly blond hair there and my leg was intertwined with his. I was ridiculously comfortably; it was like we were made to fit together. I was sated and utterly and completely spent, on many levels.

I was thinking back on the evening and having some trouble wrapping my head around everything that had happened. I could scarcely believe Eric and I had come to this point and, more pertinently, that I had come to have such a drastic shift in my ethos. Yesterday I was pretty sure of the things I wanted in my life - and even more sure of the things I didn't. Now it was all turned upside down and I knew I would have to take some time to come to grips with my new reality. But that task wasn't as scary or daunting as I would have once believed; in fact, I was looking forward to it in a strange way. Now that I had finally accepted what my unconscious had been trying to tell me, I felt very free. Admitting that I cared for and needed Eric had been so simple, really, and it almost amused me now that I had wasted so much time and effort fighting it.

I felt Eric's fingers twist into my hair and I snuggled closer to him and sighed. We had been lying in silence for many minutes, enjoying the afterglow of our (quite memorable) lovemaking. I smiled. Eric had made good on his promise, indeed. I had no desire to move or speak, content as I was. But Eric - being Eric - wasn't about to let me get off that easy.

"What are you thinking?" he asked me, curiosity evident in his voice. I loved the way his chest vibrated when he spoke. His voice, deep and smooth, was beautiful; a fitting match to the rest of him. Good heavens, but if I wasn't getting as swoony as a schoolgirl over this Viking!

"Nothing much," I replied, quite unconvincingly. I might as well have a neon light over my head flashing 'liar'. My mind was a tangle of thoughts and Eric darn well knew it. He reached over and lifted my chin so I would look at him.

"I'm feeling several emotions coming from you," he told me, looking deeply in my eyes as he spoke. He grinned after a moment. "The strongest appears to be satisfaction."

I smiled, just a bit, and buried my face back in his chest so he couldn't see me flush red. Eric was cocksure (har har) of his skills in the bedroom and I had reaffirmed his ego, quite loudly, many times tonight.

"Are you fishing for compliments?" I asked tartly. He chuckled and stroked my hair.

"Of course not, but I do enjoy knowing I've done my job well."

I rolled my eyes even though I knew he couldn't see my face. I hugged him a little tighter. "You're amazing," I told him honestly and I could feel a swell of pride roll off of him. No way could I let _that_ go unchecked.

"But then again," I continued dismissively "who wouldn't be if they had a thousand years to practice technique?"

Eric was completely still for a moment, then he grunted and reached over and hauled me on top of him so I was straddling his waist.

"You're hard to impress," he told me, smiling. His eyes took in my body while he ran his hands up and down my sides. He grabbed my hand and pulled it to his mouth. He kissed the spot on my wrist where he had taken my blood earlier. The wounds were already almost completely healed, thanks in large part to the vampire blood now running through my body. Which reminded me, I had an apology to make.

"Eric," I began, then looked down sheepishly. "I'm sorry about not, uh, helping you that night you drove me home from Shreveport." I peeked up and saw Eric had a confused look.

"You know, when that Were shot you. I should have given you blood when you were healing."

Eric just looked at me for a good little while, then his lip twitched a few times like he was fighting a smile. Finally, as though he couldn't hold it in any longer, he just roared with laughter.

This was not the response I had anticipated. In fact, it was pretty unsettling to be laughed at when you were trying to offer someone an apology! I glared at him, irritated.

"What?" I asked him, biting off the word. Eric stopped laughing, mostly, but his eyes were still amused.

"Dearest one," he said with a grin. "I may not have been hurting quite as much as I let on."

My eyes went wide. This had been a big part of my earlier epiphany. I had felt truly _guilty_ about being so selfish and now he tells me it was all just a show?

"You!" I said, raising my voice a little. I smacked both my hands against his chest. "You are so bad!" He just grinned bigger and reached out to catch my wrists before I whacked him again.

"I am," he agreed. Then he pulled me down so my cheek was pressing on his chest just under his chin. "But I agree. You still should have given me blood." His hand moved under my hair to stroke my neck in a seductive manner and he moved a bit under me. "You can make up for it now if you like."

It was comforting to know some things would never, ever change.

I closed my eyes, ignoring his innuendo, and breathed in Eric's unique scent. I could feel his fingers trailing along the skin on my back. A whiff of cold air drifted into the room, and I suspected the fire had finally burnt itself out. I shivered and Eric rearranged us a bit, moving me onto my side so I was facing him and then pulling the blanket over us. He propped himself up on an elbow so he was peering down at me.

"Better?" he asked.

"Perfect," I replied, and I wasn't just talking about the warmth. In my contentment, my eyes fluttered shut.

"Getting sleepy?" Eric asked

I opened my eyes. "A little," I answered honestly. "I've had a busy day, what with spilling trade secrets and inciting vampire wrath and almost freezing to death."

Eric chuckled.

"At least I'm all healed up." I did a mental inventory of all the aches and pains and cuts and bruises I had acquired over the course of the evening. Everything was nice and healed, courtesy of the Viking blood.

"I should hope so," Eric said, sounding amused. Then he turned serious. "Please be careful not to get carried away."

I smiled slyly. "I've had your blood before. I think I can handle it."

Eric raised his eyebrows but didn't speak. I tilted my head in confusion then raised up a little and looked down at myself for the first time and gasped. I was glowing like the full moon. I let my head fall heavily back on the pillow and I stared up at the ceiling. If Eric's blood had been alcohol I'd be three sheets to the wind right now.

"Wow," I said.

"I enjoyed it greatly," Eric said, and I turned back to face him. He was smiling again and he kissed me softly. "But for a moment there I thought we were going to have an accidental incident."

"Excuse me?"

Eric shrugged. "It happens sometimes. When too much blood is taken and given."

My eyes went round. "You mean..an accidental turning?"

Eric nodded and I closed my eyes. I remembered Bill telling me about that once, how sometimes people are turned unintentionally. And as much as Eric and I had swapped it probably wouldn't be terribly hard to accomplish. I shuddered.

"I won't let that happen, my lover," Eric told me. "I meant what I said earlier. That's why I pulled you back before it went too far."

I considered that. I was so lost in the moment, I didn't even remember when I stopped taking blood from Eric. I wondered if maybe the amount of blood I took could explain those crazy visions, the sensation of falling into a deep pit and then swept back to safety. And Eric had stopped me, even though I knew he had been every bit as on fire at that moment as I had been. I leaned over and gave Eric a lingering kiss.

"I trust you," I said and I realized in that moment just how much I meant it.

Eric looked at me very intently and one hand moved on my hip under the covers. We just gazed at one another for several minutes, not needing words. I was rejoicing inside at having him with me. I knew the blood bond we shared - the one I had freely chosen to renew tonight - was tugging at me, willing me to lose myself in Eric. I wanted to, and I wanted to envelop him as well, pull him into me and guard him like a precious jewel. I was so deliriously happy I wasn't sure my heart could even contain my joy. And the most amazing thing was that I knew Eric was feeling the same. This peculiar and oftentimes rocky friendship I had forged with the Viking had slowly transformed into something extraordinary. We were as one, now. And though we hadn't yet admitted love, I knew what we felt for one another was very close.

I thought I finally understood what all the fuss over our blood bond was about, at least in part. My life was in Eric's hands, and his was in mine. Our bond was more than just pleasant feelings and the ability to sense one another's whereabouts. Something much deeper was swirling between us now, I was certain. I wasn't sure how it all worked, but I knew without a doubt if any harm would befall Eric I would take it _very_ personally. I recalled how much it hurt me to see Siegbert abusing him, how outraged I was when that Were shot him, and that was back when I had been fighting our bond tooth and nail. I had a dreadful suspicion that if such a thing were to happen again, I would feel every kick and bullet as though I were taking it myself. It was a scary thought but I didn't retreat from it. If Eric could deal with this, so could I. How much harder it must be for him, what with my being so much more breakable.

Eric was looking at me with an odd expression I couldn't place. He leaned over and kissed me gently once more and I closed my eyes. The long and emotional night was starting to catch up with me and when Eric pulled away my eyes remained closed. I didn't want to sleep, not now. I knew Eric would have to leave soon and I didn't want to waste a single moment with him. But I was so relaxed, so warm and safe here in my bed with this ancient vampire lover of mine. The pull to just drift off into sweet dreams was almost inexorable. I breathed in and out a few times, deeply, and heard Eric whisper my name very low. I mumbled a response, feeling sleep about to claim me.

Suddenly something gripped me, hard, inside my chest. My eyes flew open and I sat bolt upright, one hand clutching my throat. I couldn't breathe, could scarcely think. My blood was pounding in my ears like thunder. I felt like someone had tied a chain around my waist and attached the other end to a speeding car and I was careening out of control, being pulled along painfully. Some instinct kicked in and wanted to jump up and start running. Maybe if I ran fast enough I could catch the thing that was dragging me and then it wouldn't hurt anymore. I was terrified. Tears welled in my eyes and I felt like I was suffocating.

Then as suddenly as it started, the terrible thing that had gripped me let me go. I gasped for air and realized Eric was sitting up now, beside me, with his arms wrapped around me, rocking me, stroking my back in a soothing way. He was whispering into my hair, but my breathing was so ragged and I was crying now so I couldn't hear what he was saying. I struggled to slow my heart and I clenched my eyes shut trying to stave off the flow of tears. After a few minutes I was calmed down enough to register Eric's words.

He was _apologizing_.

"Sookie, my lover, I'm sorry. I did not mean to hurt you. I'm here. I've got you. Please do not cry..."

I pushed back a little so I could see Eric's face. He looked nearly as pained as I felt.

"Sookie," he said.

"What did you do to me?" I demanded, though my voice was barely above a whisper.

Eric took my face in his hands gently and his eyes looked into mine.

"I called to you, lover," he said softly.

"What?" I asked, not really understanding. "You what?" Eric was looking at me with apprehension.

I huffed out a breath and pulled away from him to give myself some space. My head was spinning. That horrible feeling, the pain, _that_ was what it meant to be called?

I heard Eric's words to Andre in my head: _'she heels nicely.'_

Oh, sweet Jesus!

"Sookie," Eric began, and I raised a hand and shook my head. I didn't want to hear anything he had to say right then. The terror of what I had just experienced was still too near. I needed a minute, but Eric wasn't in the mood to wait. He took my arms and turned my body to face him. He looked me right in the eyes. I could feel a wave of emotion coming off him and I recognized it instantly, it was so strong. Anger. At himself.

"I did not mean to hurt you," he continued, each word emphatic. "I was simply testing our bond. I was calling to you while we were lying here. I was just trying to ascertain if I could reach you now that we were so closely bound and you were no longer fighting against it."

"Well, I guess you succeeded," I replied, and my voice was more than a little shaky. I couldn't believe it, still. _This_ was what vampires had to deal with? That terrible pull, is that what Bill had felt when Lorena had called to him? I shook my head. Lord, it was no wonder he couldn't resist. Who could, I wondered? I looked back at Eric, feeling insanely betrayed that he would inflict that kind of torment on me.

"This is what you wanted me to learn to hear?" I asked him accusingly and before the last word had left my mouth he was already shaking his head.

"No, no. I did not intend to hurt you. I can control the strength of my call. I started out very weak, and you did not respond. I tried again, several times, a little stronger with each attempt. Sookie, I never thought my final attempt would work as it did."

"What happened?" I asked, feeling my anxiety start to seep away. I felt a chill and reached down to pull the blanket up. Eric helped me wrap it around my shoulders.

"I'm not sure," he told me, and he didn't sound happy about not knowing. "Possibly, as you were relaxing into sleep, whatever mental shields you have were lowered. That, combined with the strength of our bond, is what caused such a strong response."

"It hurt," I said.

"I know," he said quietly. "I know what it feels like. I would not inflict that on you intentionally. I won't try again, unless you agree. And even if you do, never will I place such strength behind the call."

I could hear the sincerity in his words and thanks to our bond I knew he was feeling remorseful. I nodded at him, tried to smile. He put an arm around me and tenderly lay me back down in the bed. I snuggled into the pillow and rested on my side. Eric took the same position opposite me. It was upsetting to me that the peacefulness of our night had been so disrupted, though it was far from my fault. Even so, I wanted to calm the waters. Eric had apologized with sincerity. I could either accept it. Or not. I chose the former.

"So, if you can control the strength," I began, trying to keep my voice light, "what was that, on a scale of one to ten? Like an eleven?" I tried, and failed, to make a joke out of it.

Eric didn't answer for a moment. I got the impression he didn't want to.

"More like a five," he finally said.

Okay, definitely feeling some sympathy for Bill. I was also gaining a healthy dose of respect for what vampires had to contend with.

"Are you afraid of me?" Eric asked softly. His gaze was piercing.

What right minded person wouldn't be, I wondered? But then again, I never claimed to be in my right mind. I pushed away the negativity and the fear, reminded myself that I was with Eric, my blood bound lover that cared for me and protected me and saved me many times. He hadn't hurt me on purpose, I told myself sternly. I would not let myself slip back into fear and mistrust. I would not.

"No," I said firmly and to demonstrate I wriggled over to press myself against him. He turned onto his back and I nestled back into the little nook in his shoulder that seemed to be made just for my head. I held my breath. I was about to do something insane.

"Okay, try again," I stated. "But this time, turn down the juice. A lot."

Eric went absolutely still. He didn't speak or move for almost a full minute.

"Are you sure about this?" he asked me finally.

"Look, yes I'm sure. But if you don't get on with it I might change my mind. You said you wanted me to be able to hear you, right?"

"Yes," he said slowly. "It could be helpful."

I'd make him explain the details later, but right now I knew I would back down if we delayed.

"Alright then. We already know it can work, I just have to figure out how to let you in and you, obviously, need to figure out how not to scare the daylights out of me."

Eric seemed to consider that for a bit then he held me tighter against him. "Thank you for trusting me."

"I'm out of my mind," I mumbled and I felt Eric shake with silent laughter. I think he agreed with me.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, then another and another. I was trying to relax, to clear my head and tear down all the shields and blocks that I had spent a lifetime building up to keep out other people's thoughts. I listened hard, tried to find some hint of Eric's call, even while a part of me was steeling myself for another onslaught of pain.

Minutes passed. Nothing happened.

"Sookie?" Eric spoke softly. I released a ragged breath in exasperation.

"I'm sorry," I said, feeling embarrassed for an unfathomable reason.

"Don't be," he told me firmly. "I know this is difficult for you."

"Try again," I instructed, feeling a little bemused at giving orders to Eric.

Eric nodded and this time I concentrated not on relaxing, but on other things. I heard the wind whistling outside, heard the soft rumble of the old heater inside. I heard my own breathing, deep and even and the little ticks coming from my Grandmother's antique wind-up clock on the dresser. I let my eyes close and just when I was about to give up again I felt it.

It wasn't the terrible and frightening sensation that I had felt earlier. This was like a gentle tug, a pull that was almost natural. It reminded me of the way I would feel a desire to get a glass of water when I was thirsty. It was insistent, but not urgent. He must only be using level one, I thought to myself. I didn't move a muscle for fear of losing the call. I tried to commit it to memory. I smiled hugely against Eric's chest and tightened my grip on him. The second I lost concentration the sensation lapsed. That was both frustrating and comforting. This curse - or gift - I had was all mine and I wanted to be able to control it and use it how I saw fit. If Eric thought it would be helpful for me to be able to hear him, then I would go with it. (for now anyway) But it was a comfort to know I could shut it down if I wanted.

"Did you hear me?" he asked anxiously and I nodded.

"Yes! But I didn't really _hear_ anything, I just felt a pull."

He nodded like he understood. "That will come later. I'm proud of you. I know you were frightened after what happened the first time."

"I was, a little," I admitted. An understatement.

"But not now?"

"Nope," I answered truthfully. "Maybe we can practice again sometime." My eyes shut again of their own accord. It was way past my bedtime.

"I knew you wouldn't always fear me," Eric said after a moment.

I sighed audibly. "I really wish you wouldn't do that."

"Do what?" he asked.

"Nothing," I yawned.

"No, tell me." He was being mighty insistent and I was too tired to argue. I turned my head so I was more or less looking at him.

"You're always making little remarks like that. You told me I wouldn't always be loyal to Bill, and I wouldn't always fear you. You punched that stupid kid at the gas station for making a crude remark to me, your _future lover, _and then you told me I'd like the blood bond." I stopped because Eric had started to laugh.

"You think this is funny?" I asked, propping myself up on an elbow to look at him better.

"I was right, was I not?"

"That's not the point!" I told him. "It's irritating to have someone always trying to tell you what you will and will not do! You act like you have some crystal ball stashed away!"

Eric smirked at me. "Well, I did have a psychic once. Maybe something rubbed off."

He was hopeless and I was exhausted. I rolled my eyes and lay my head back on his shoulder. "Yeah, I remember." I lowered my voice and did my best Eric impersonation. "It was incredible!"

He was still chuckling and I felt him nuzzle his cheek in my hair. "Are you jealous?"

"Please," I huffed. "If I was jealous of all the women you've slept with I'd be glowing lime green by now." It wasn't precisely the truth, of course. I was pretty sure I would take an unholy glee in wringing that little psychic's neck if I ever saw her.

"Good," he replied, lifting my chin to kiss me lightly. "I do not wish to make you jealous. Besides, I can hardly use the word incredible anymore in regards to past encounters. Not after having you."

"Mmmm. I like hearing that," I told him. I smiled and closed my eyes again, feeling the now-savored feelings of warmth and safety wrap around me once more. My breathing slowed and deepened. I was fighting Mr. Sandman, but it was a losing battle.

"You should sleep," Eric whispered. He started to untangle himself and I made a squeaky little noise of protest. I could barely stand the thought of being apart from him, even though I knew it was as inevitable as the dawn. I clutched at him and he stopped.

"Sookie?" he questioned and I forced myself to open my heavy eyes to look at him. He was so beautiful, I thought dreamily.

"Do you have to go?" I asked, my voice sounding weary and despondent.

He played with a strand of my hair. "I can stay just a while longer if you like."

"Don't leave me yet," I whispered and my eyes closed once again and my Viking lover held me close and stroked my hair. I was just about to drift away when I heard Eric's voice. It seemed so far away and I struggled to hear him.

"Dearest one," he whispered into my hair. "You will be the last thought I have before I sleep, and the first when I wake."

I wanted to respond, but I couldn't, I was too close to oblivion. I knew he would be gone when I awoke, but I also knew he would still be with me, in a way. I felt Eric gently take my hand that was lying across his stomach. He brought it to his lips and quietly kissed it, then laid it on his chest above his silent heart.

And for the second time in my life, I fell asleep holding hands with a vampire.

-

_To be continued_


	12. Chapter 12

**Know Thyself**

**Chapter Twelve**

There is nothing quite like waking up after a perfect, dreamless sleep.

No alarm clock sounded in my ears to hasten my return to consciousness. My eyes opened of their own accord and I lay in my bed, snuggled under the warm blankets, for a good long while. I was all alone and normally that wouldn't bother me, but today I felt quite lonely. My Eric had left me, as I knew he would, some time before dawn. I didn't remember him leaving, though I had no doubt he payed me a kiss before he left. At least I hope he had. As a matter of fact, he darn well better had kissed me goodbye!

I rolled onto my side and reached over to grab hold of the pillow on which Eric had laid his head. I pulled it in close, inhaled deeply and smiled. Some of his unique scent and his cologne still lingered. It helped ease the ache in my heart, if just a little. I squeezed the pillow to my chest, closed my eyes and sighed.

"Do you two need a moment alone?" said a cheerfully amused voice.

My eyes flew open and I sat bolt upright, getting a little lightheaded in the process as adrenaline jump-started my heart.

"Claudine!" I wailed, relief and irritation warring for the top spot in my emotions. With embarrassment I remembered I was very naked and I quickly pulled the covers up and tucked them under my arms

"Good morning, cousin!"

My shoulders relaxed, and I managed a small smile. It was hard to get annoyed with someone so perpetually enthusiastic, even if they were camped out in my bedroom uninvited.

I changed positions in the bed so I was sitting cross-legged and took a moment to just absorb my guardian, who was propped on the end of my bed, smiling hugely. Claudine was looking fabulous as always, this time sporting a dark purple, form fitting sweater with a lot of fuzzy stuff around the neck and sleeves. The pants that covered her long legs were tight, leaving little to the imagination. She was a six foot tall fairy diva and my personal guardian (almost-but-not-quite) angel.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, feeling uneasy. Claudine generally only popped in when trouble or danger was afoot.

Oh, okay. Right.

My still-waking brain was a little slow to remember that there was, in fact, trouble and danger lurking. Those final few hours with Eric were so sublime, so perfect, I nearly forgot I had a ruthless vampire running willy-nilly with my deep, dark secret and a plan to make me his personal property. And that was _so_ not a good thing.

Claudine bounced up from the bed - no kidding, she actually bounced on the balls of her feet as she stood - then she disappeared into the bathroom and emerged with my bathrobe. She tossed it to me and turned around to give me some privacy. She raised a hand and examined her perfect nails as I thanked her, disentangled myself from the covers and wrapped the robe around me. As I did so, I realized I was sore in all the right places and I couldn't help but smile. I checked the clock and was a little surprised to see it was nearly two in the afternoon. Eric knew how to wear a girl out, yes indeed! It was a good thing I didn't have to be at work until four thirty.

Claudine turned back and came to stand right in front of me. She was wearing very high heels and I felt like a dwarf.

"I'm going to make you coffee," she said with a smile. "Go on, get cleaned up now. I know you need a good shower!" She winked at me, tossed her long hair and disappeared down the hall.

Well, alright then.

She was correct, of course, the warm water was much needed and felt wonderful. Claudine was such a whirlwind I was halfway through washing my hair before I realized she never did answer my question as to why she was here. I wondered how much she knew about what happened last night, besides the obvious. I assumed she knew I had entertained company, what with my waking up pajama-less and the quip about needing a shower. Not to mention my bedroom probably had the lingering scent of lust hanging in the air.

I let my mind drift to pleasant thoughts as I finished getting cleaned up and it wasn't too long before I was washed, dried and dressed in my Merlotte's winter work uniform. I pulled my hair back in a dark band and dabbed on some make-up before emerging. I could feel a silly smile plastered on my face and I didn't even care. Heck, as much as Claudine was always grinning we might actually look like kin for a change.

I walked down the hall and into the living room where my fairy cousin was patiently waiting. Her back was toward me and she was looking at the floor with her hip cocked out and her arms crossed. I winced a little when I realized what was holding her attention.

"Would you believe me if I told you I just hated the ending?" I asked, sounding abashed.

Claudine used one toe to nudge a piece of the broken Gone with the Wind video tape then laughed. She turned to me and favored me with one of her patented smiles

"I made you lunch!"

She was really, really excited about that.

"Thanks," I told her, then I remembered my manners. "If you're chilly I can light the fire."

I walked passed her to the kitchen and did a double take when I saw the spread laid out on the counter. Fruit, meat and cheese and bread, a crisp veggie platter complete with dip. The works! And coffee, as promised. Did I even have all this in my fridge? No, I know I didn't, but I wasn't going to waste time thinking about it. I was suddenly ravenous and I loaded down a plate, grabbed a cup of caffeine and placed it on the table. I headed back in to ask Claudine to join me and was just in time to see her snap her fingers and do some kind of magical fairy move. In an instant there were roaring flames in the fireplace. Hmph. Neat trick. Then a memory from the previous night slapped me upside the head and my eyes went wide.

"Were you here last night?" I demanded and though I wouldn't have thought it possible her smile actually got bigger and brighter. She clapped her hands in front of her.

"Yes!" She was giddy with excitement. "I'm so glad you asked! I'm not supposed to tell you when I do an intervention, because that would be bragging. But it would be worse to lie if you ask!"

I wasn't sure I followed all that, but I got the general idea.

"You lit my fire last night?"

She nodded. "Yes. I knew you would need the warmth when tall-and-blond got you home." Then she turned slightly more serious. Very slightly. "The whole running around in your pajamas was pretty stupid, by the way."

She walked past me as I stood there with my mouth hanging open. I regrouped and followed her to the kitchen. She plopped down in a chair and started picking at the fruit on my plate.

"If you don't eat this, I might," she told me.

I sat down, my head slowly putting the events of the previous evening together.

"What else did you do?" I asked slowly, then answered my own question. "You started the movie playing again after it was paused?"

Her smile said that was a definite yes. I kept going.

"My calendar in the bathroom. The date was wrong...."

Claudine giggled. "There were so many good quotes to choose from. I almost went with March 19th."

"Uh huh." I made a mental note to check out the runner-up quote. "So you were doing all this...why?"

Claudine made a little sandwich of cheese and ham and handed it to me. I took it. "I'm your guardian, Sook!" She said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Oh! And you forgot one. I moved your coat, too." She winked at me.

I took a bite of my sandwich. I really was hungry and it tasted wonderful. I mulled things over in my head as I ate, not sure if I should be upset or not. It was really creepy thinking Claudine had been poofing around my house last night. It was even creepier to think she had possibly orchestrated my whole epiphany regarding Eric. I should be angry, right? But it was just _so darn hard_ to get irritable with someone that stopped you from falling asleep at the wheel and had pulled you out of a burning house. It's even harder when that person is sitting across from you looking proud as a peacock. But there was part of me that was absolutely scared to death. What happened between Eric and I was so perfect, so pure, I didn't want to even think it had been a manufactured situation. But I knew Niall was not above such things. I started to feel a little sick.

"So you intervened, you said?" I asked slowly, making a concerted effort to keep my voice calm and level. "What does that mean, exactly?"

Claudine popped another little piece of fruit in her mouth then crossed her arms on the table and leaned forward.

"I know what you're thinking, cousin, and you need to knock it off right now." Claudine was still smiling, but there was something no-nonsense in her tone that made me take her quite seriously. "I was sent her to help you. I can sometimes prevent disasters, as you know, and I can sometimes even save you from some. And sometimes I can even help save you from yourself." I could have sworn her eyes actually sparkled as she spoke.

"I don't get it, " I told her and she cocked her head to the side. "If you hadn't helped me last night, would I still have...well, I mean would Eric and I have, um..." I know what I wanted to ask: _Would I still have had the most incredible night of my life with Eric?_ But I couldn't finish. I felt like an idiot.

Claudine just smiled. Big shocker there. "I can't manipulate your thoughts or emotions or actions. That isn't what I do! All I did was help you see what you already knew and what you decided to do after that was all on you!"

There was no deceit in her voice or in her eyes and I felt instantly better. A big balloon of tension seemed to evaporate in a big whoosh. It was real. What happened between Eric and I was real, not contrived through fairy magic. As I thought about it I got a little angry at myself. Why did I have some insecure need to have my own feelings validated by Claudine, anyway? I could have kicked my own ass just then.

"So why did you decide to pop in last night?" I asked, honestly curious. "Just feeling helpful?"

Claudine looked around, embarrassed. "You're my first assignment," she began, her voice as weak as I'd ever heard it. "I'm still learning how to be a guardian and you are most difficult to keep up with."

"Claudine," I told her softly and reached across the table to touch her hand. "You are doing a great job. I couldn't ask for a better fairy Godmother!" I grinned like a fool and she did the same.

"I'm glad you think so. I _am_ doing my best. But still, I could use some help. And Eric Northman is a formidable vampire. He has protected your life several times when I was unable to get to you. He would not have done that if he didn't sincerely care for you. Believe me, I have known my share of vampires!" she shuddered and I wondered how many she had been forced to fend off. "I hope I didn't do wrong."

I considered that as I grabbed a celery stick and coated it with some veggie dip. "I don't think you did wrong, Claudine. And I guess I should say thanks."

"You are very welcome!" I had a feeling I had just made her day.

I nibbled at some more of my lunch in silence for a few minutes. I had a million questions for Claudine, but wasn't sure if I should ask them. I had no idea how much Claudine knew about what happened last night, in regards to Victor. I decided to start slow and see how it went. I checked the clock and was pleased to see I still had a while before I had to be leaving for the bar.

"I have to ask - were you here in the house the whole night?"

Claudine looked shocked. "Of course not! I would never spy on you. I only got here when I knew you were in distress. I realized it was because you had argued with your vampire, and that's when I decided to intervene. As soon as he brought you back home and I knew you were safe I left."

Ah. So she didn't know about the events with Victor. "Did Niall know you were here last night?" I asked as casually as I could. Claudine shook her head.

"No. He's not here right now."

I nodded. Apparently Great-Grandfather was off in one of those 'Faeries Only' zones I had heard about. I couldn't even begin to imagine what such a place would look like. I was getting visions of woods and bubbling brooks and rainbows and unicorns, oh my!

"Was there a reason you asked?" Claudine interrupted my thoughts. "Would you like to see him? I'm sure he would love to hear from you."

"Claudine," I said, ignoring her question. "Do you and I have any kind of, well, like a guardian - guardianee confidentiality clause in our relationship?" I watched her carefully and noticed she was doing the same to me.

"Is there something you want to tell me, Sookie?"

"I'm not sure. I have more of a hypothetical question for you, but it's not something I want repeated."

"Claudine leaned back in her chair and was silent for a moment. "If you tell me something and ask me to keep it private I can't betray your confidence. I mean, I could, but I would have to take a step or two backward."

"And you don't want to do that?" I pressed. She shook her head, and her eyes went wide.

"Oh, no. Every step is a long process, to lose any would be just terrible."

I took a deep breath. I needed to talk to someone about what happened last night with Victor and Claudine, exuberant and cheerful and bouncy as she was, might just be my best bet. I looked at my gorgeous faerie cousin and hoped I wasn't wrong about her.

"I'm curious," I began, never taking my eyes off the faerie. "And this is just a hypothetical question, remember?" Claudine nodded, but in such a way that I knew I wasn't fooling her. "If I knew someone was planning to hurt me what would you do?"

Claudine's perfect lips parted a big and her dark eyes went round. "I can't kill anyone for you."

"I know, I know. Too many steps backwards." I remembered her telling me that was why she couldn't kill Bill for me after I learned of his betrayal. Not that I'd asked, of course! "But what about Niall?"

Claudine looked at me closely. "If someone is out to harm you, Sookie, you must tell Niall."

"That's why I'm asking you: what would he do?"

"It would depend on who the person was that was trying to harm you," she said simply.

"Let's say it's a vampire."

"Niall would kill him, of course." She said this as though I were a little slow for even asking.

"And then what?" I pushed. "That would be the end of it?" I knew it wouldn't be. Something had prevented me from calling my great-grandfather last night. Some instinct kicked in that made me physically unable to even touch the button on the phone. I didn't understand it, but somehow, I trusted it.

Claudine, I noticed, was suddenly looking mighty uncomfortable. She even fidgeted in the chair a bit. I raised my eyebrows, waiting.

"Depending on who the vampire was, there would be varying consequences. Niall is very powerful, but even he can't kill without penalty. If it was a vampire with little or no power, he could be simply fined- and for Niall that would be no hardship. On the other extreme, killing a vampire with position or power, especially one in the hierarchy, could easily incite a war."

"War?" I repeated, frowning.

Claudine nodded vigorously. "Oh, yes. That's how one of the last wars started. A vampire killed a middle ranking member of the Fae royalty, and the Fae responded with a vengeance kill on a vampire Queen. This infuriated the vampires. They believed the killing of a Queen to satisfy a blood debt owed on a lower ranking Fae was unfair, so they struck again. In the end there were many deaths on both sides."

"That sounds crazy!" It reminded me of one of Jason's mob movies.

Claudine shrugged. "Balance must be kept."

"And Niall would risk something like that happening again? Over me?"

"Oh, yes."

"Why?" I breathed. I knew Niall was fond of me, but we had barely met. And I was, after all, just his mortal great-granddaughter.

"I'm not allowed to tell you that," she said sadly, but with conviction.

Fair enough. I changed direction quickly. Claudine was giving me a lot more information than she realized and I wanted to keep the conversation going as long as I could.

"So what would happen, if the Fae and the vamps decided to battle it out? How does that work? Would everyone get involved, or do you have like an army?"

Claudine smiled, and I think she was relieved I hadn't pressed her when she said she couldn't tell me why I was so important to Niall.

"We have no army. The ranks of the Fae have been reduced over the centuries, though we still have great power. If we were to go to war, either with vampires or another group, we would all be duty bound to fight, myself included. It's the same with vampires and shifters and weres and the other supernatural groups. We all tolerate one another to varying degrees, and we can even work together at times, but if it comes to a war, we will all stand with our own kind, even unto death."

Whoa.

I slumped where I sat, and my eyes closed and I said a silent prayer. To think Niall would kill for me, even knowing it could start a war was bad enough. But to think that Claudine and Claude could be brought into the mess, that they could be forced to risk their lives, was numbing. And I thought about Eric and Pam and what Claudine said about standing with their own kind. Eric told me once if it ever came to war again with the Fae the first one he would take out was Niall. The thought of Eric and Pam and Bill fighting to the death with my Fae family gave me a sick feeling.

"Sookie," Claudine pulled me back from my contemplation. "I made you a promise that I would keep your confidence, but if you suspect you are in danger, you really need to talk to Niall. I do as much as I can, but I'm far from perfect. We can't risk losing you."

She stood suddenly, and smoothed her tight pants and shook out her hair. She beamed at me.

"You're leaving?" I asked, and I stood up myself.

"Yes, I have to meet Claude at the club to discuss some mundane business difficulties and," she cocked her head to the side and listened, "it sounds like you have company, so I'll have to see you later!" She gave me a big hug then stepped back. "You remember what I said, Sook!" Then with a little pop she was gone. I shook my head. I felt like the only person in the world that didn't have the ability to make a dramatic exit.

As it turned out, my company was actually my roommate. Within seconds of Claudine's departure, I heard a key turn in the back door and Amelia bounded in, a small duffle bag hanging off one shoulder that caused her to lean a bit to one side. I looked behind her, expecting to see Octavia, but Amelia turned, shut the door and dropped the bag on the floor. She walked over and sat heavily down on the couch, and sighed loudly.

"It feels so good to be home," she said, leaning her head back and closing her eyes.

I grinned. "Welcome back, witch."

"Thanks telepath," she replied, smiling but not bothering to open her eyes. "Did you have a good night off?"

"It was...real interesting," I told her. "Where's Octavia?"

Amelia was broadcasting like crazy, so I knew the older witch had dropped Amelia off and taken the car into town to pick up a prescription at the drugstore before I heard the words.

Amelia opened her eyes and leaned forward. She gave a little gasp and jumped up and crossed the room. I sighed.

"What did you do?" she asked, sounding horrified as she stared at the broken VCR tape on the floor. I really needed to get that cleaned up, it was becoming quite the conversation piece. I went to grab a broom and dustpan and Amelia dogged my steps.

"Okay, spill. What happened last night? You sounded strange on the phone."

I sighed and I started cleaning up the mess. "Nothing. It was just a really crazy night. I guess I got a little emotional."

"Uh huh." The witch did not sound convinced. She followed me when I went into the kitchen to dump the remains in the trash. When I turned around she was holding two empty True Blood bottles, one in each hand. Oh hell.

"Crazy night, I bet!" I let myself hear her thoughts, and was surprised to find that she thought Bill had been my guest.

I took the bottles from her and sat them back down on the counter. "Eric came by last night. He brought me a check. The money I was owed from Rhodes."

Amelia's eyes lit up. "Eric, huh?"

"Yes," I said tartly and sat down at the kitchen table. Amelia let it go, but I had to smile when I picked up on the visuals she was getting in her head. Some of them weren't too far off. She eyed the food on the counter.

"Where did all this come from?" she asked, grabbing a plate and filling it up.

"Claudine," I said and Amelia rolled her eyes.

She sat down across from me and started eating like she hadn't had a bite in days.

"So how was your trip?" I asked conversationally. Amelia nodded and held up one finger while she finished chewing.

"It was unbelievable!" She enunciated each syllable. "We were just going there to socialize, you know. Talk shop with some of Octavia's friends, have dinner and all. But then right as we were about to sit down to eat this witch shows up - she was invited, but the person she brought with her wasn't." Amelia could not look more excited. She held her hands up in front of her. "Baako Edusai."

She was clearly expecting a reaction. I stared at her blankly. Her face crumbled.

"I guess you don't know him," she stated blandly. I shook my head.

"I guess he's a big shot in the witch community?"

Amelia let out a long breath. "He's more than that. He's a legend. I've heard about him, and read about him and studied him, but I never thought I'd get to meet him! He's from somewhere in Africa, but he travels around a lot. He was in New Orleans to do some work and he invited our group to tag along. I swear, just watching him probably accelerated my studies by years!"

"What does he do?" I asked. I was only mildly curious, but this was clearly something that meant a great deal to Amelia so I wanted to be supportive.

"He's a spellbinder," she said. "And one of the best. He does all kinds of enchants and charms. He gets paid big money for it, too. You wouldn't believe what vamps are paying for his services now."

"Such as?"

"Okay, he was telling us about this vampire King - he didn't say which one - that is so paranoid about getting that virus, the one that makes them weak, that he won't feed off humans anymore."

My eyes went wide. He must be very paranoid indeed. Vampires loved their drinks on tap. Amelia smirked.

"I guess he got it a few years ago and now he's really careful. So anyway, he bought this goblet and he had Baako put a spell on it. If any contaminated blood touches it, the goblet turns blue. So now this King will drain human blood into the goblet and drink only from there. Pretty crazy, huh?"

"Yeah, it is," I agreed. "But there can't be too many paranoid vamps out there, is there?"

Amelia shook her head. "Not really, but he can make some fat cash off the ones that are, since everyone knows he's the best at things like that. Mostly Baako does enchants for supe ceremonies, the big deal events like births and marriages and burial rituals. But here is the best thing," she leaned forward and her voice lowered, and I felt a swell of pride in her mind "Baako is a scavenger." She giggled like mad. "Of course, no one would dare call him that to his face!"

My brow crinkled. "You lost me. What's a scavenger?"

Amelia stood up and started gathering the empty plates and napkins from the table. I sensed a cleaning frenzy coming on.

"A scavenger - it's a derogatory term for a witch that is born without natural magical power. Someone that has to study and train to acquire the ability." Her head raised a fraction. "Someone like me."

"Ah." It was the only thing I could think of to say and I didn't need to ask anything more. Amelia was pretty passionate about this, and she was broadcasting like crazy. I could see that she was very proud of what she had accomplished, and it angered her that she was looked down on by others in her world, those that had innate magic. I got a vision directly from her head. She was thinking that if she ever became as powerful as Baako she would have the word SCAVENGER tattooed on her butt and would moon everyone that had ever been snotty to her. I chuckled.

"You go girl," I whispered. She looked at me from across the room. She was already running water in the sink to take care of the dishes.

"Well, it's just not fair, you know?" She was scrubbing a plate much harder than was necessary. "It's like those people in school that never have to study but still get straight A's. Sure, they might be naturally smart, but they never learn how to study and organize their time. So the people that actually have to work to get those grades are really better off in the long run, right?"

"Sure," I agreed with her. I could read in her head she wasn't quite as confident in her superiority as she was trying to make out. There was a part of her that wished desperately she had some natural born magic of her own. She was jealous, but she would never admit it and I would never call her on it. I raised my shields again at full strength, feeling guilty about traipsing around in my friend's head. (even if her mind _was_ like an open door, practically inviting me in!)

Amelia kept going. She was really on a roll now. "I was lucky that Octavia agreed to take me on. She's a great mentor, but she was born with the magical ability and a lot of them won't deal with people like me, the ones without the_ essential spark_." She said the final words with more than a touch of sarcasm and distaste. I nodded, then froze. I had heard those words before.

"What did you just say?" I asked.

Amelia frowned. "That I was lucky to have Octavia?"

"No, about the spark."

"Oh. Nothing. That's just a term we use - well,_ I_ don't use it - to categorize people born with magical abilities. Just because a person is born with magic doesn't mean they can ever learn to use it. The magic just kind of sits there, dormant. But if someone has the essential spark, as they call it, it means that person has managed to activate their magical abilities, turn it on. And after that happens they can move forward if they want to."

"Move forward?" I asked, curiosity piquing.

Amelia shrugged. "Yeah. Move forward with training. It's all really ridiculous, in my opinion, the way they want to put people into categories and give them labels. People like Baako prove that you don't need to be a natural-born to be powerful and...."

Amelia had crossed the line into rant, and I let her go on, tuned her out. I was thinking about something else, about the first meeting I had with Niall and how he had told me the essential spark had passed Jason by. I thought it was just a nice way of saying Jason was selfish and unappreciative, but now I wondered if Niall had meant something else entirely.

A loud rap on the door made me jump. My house was a popular place today, it seemed.

"I'll get it," I said, since Amelia was still up to her elbows in bubbles.

I was only slightly surprised to find a young man in a private courier uniform standing on my porch. I smiled as I signed for the three packages, knowing even before I saw the Fangtasia return address who was the sender. A lot of Eric's trips to my house seemed to culminate in deliveries the following day, but I couldn't begin to imagine what the Viking had decided to send this time. All three boxes were wrapped in basic brown paper and were of varying sizes.

I thanked the delivery guy and brought the boxes into the kitchen where Amelia had already finished up the dishes and was now putting plastic wrap over the remaining food.

"What did you get?" she asked, coming closer.

"I have no idea," I told her honestly. I slid the largest package across the table toward the witch. She immediately began tearing paper off one box as I worked on another one. We were both smiling. It was like Christmas again!

I felt my cheeks go red when I saw what was in the first box. New pajamas and definitely not of the same style, fabric and coverage as the ones I had worn last night. It wasn't lingerie, thank God, but it was sure on the sexy side. He sent me a two piece set, with (very) short shorts and a low-cut top with spaghetti straps. It was silky and clingy and (of course) bright red. I noticed Amelia looking at me. She didn't say anything, just raised her eyebrows and smirked.

I put the pj's back in the box and kept my head down as I opened the next box. About halfway through I heard Amelia hiss.

"Wow."

"What?" I asked. She was staring into the box looking a little mesmerized. She pushed the open package over to me.

Wow was right. Eric had sent me jewelry. A _lot _of jewelry. A couple necklaces, one delicate and the other thick, several earrings, and some bangle bracelets. I picked up each piece slowly and carefully, admiring them. They were gorgeous, no doubt, and I'm sure it cost a pretty penny, but that wasn't the most remarkable thing about them. They were all silver.

"So why would a vampire send you silver jewelry?" Amelia wondered out loud. She reached over and picked up the bracelets and tried them on. "He's not into S&M is he?"

I choked out a little laugh and held my hand out. Amelia pulled off the bracelets and dropped them into my palm. I put everything into the box with the red silk pajamas.

"I have no idea," I told her. I was lying, of course. I knew exactly why Eric had sent me silver. He might as well have included a note that said 'In case of emergency'.

Amelia had already moved on. "What's in the last box?"

I was glad I opened this one last. I shook my head and laughed as I held up a brand new copy of Gone with the Wind. There was a folded note included.

_Try not to break this one, lover. I would like to finish watching this with you another time, and I would like you to wear my present when we do._

_Not the silver!_

_-E_

I folded the note back and held it up to my chest briefly. I could not keep the grin off my face. Amelia was practically ready to explode.

"Please, just answer this one question," she begged.

"Sure, why not," I answered. I was in a great mood all of a sudden.

"Is he as good as he looks?" She was nearly salivating with curiosity.

"Better," I told her. "Much, much better."

I turned on my heel, box of goodies in hand, and marched down the hall to my bedroom, leaving Amelia grinning in the kitchen. She was happy for me and I was happy for me and I had presents from Eric! Life was pretty good until I noticed the clock. Sam would _not_ be happy for me if I was late for my shift. I had to boogie.

I dropped the package on my bed and jogged down the hall and grabbed my purse and coat. I said good-bye to Amelia, opened the door and then stopped. I went back to my room and retrieved a few silver bracelets and slid them on. After a brief hesitation I popped in some silver stud earrings and slipped on the thinner of the silver necklaces.

Girl can't be too careful these days, right?

-

_To be continued_

_I know, I know, took me forever to update! The next several installments are going to be up MUCH faster. This was a transition chapter and it was annoying for me, the next one is more to my liking and I'm working on it now! As always, thanks for all the kind words and support!_


	13. Chapter 13

Know Thyself

Chapter Thirteen

The drive to work had seemed to fly by. I hadn't even bothered turning on the radio in the car as I drove; my own thoughts had kept me plenty entertained. Once I had shut the car door and got myself buckled in, it had hit me hard that I was alone for the first time since I had woken up today. No fairy guardian, no roommates, just little ol' me. So I had a few minutes to think and get my head together. There was a lot to take in - my relationship with Eric (as yet undefined but certainly changed) the problem with Victor and what he may or may not decide to do with me. (kill me, bite me, ignore me) the peculiar conversations with both Claudine and Amelia, in which both gave me new insights and information, but in the process also opened up a whole new realm of questions. I had been thinking on some of those things as I pulled into Merlotte's and got ready to start my shift.

Overall, I had a lot to chew on, some very, very big and important things. But try as I might, I couldn't stop my mind from going back, time and again, to the Sheriff of Area Five. I kept remembering how wonderful he felt against my bare skin, how beautiful his eyes looked when we were in the middle of our lovemaking. I was trying not to think about him, I was trying hard, but I was failing. I was having trouble concentrating on the simplest of tasks tonight. Twice I had brought the wrong order to the wrong table and I had even managed to spill a beer on the lap of a college girl that was on her first date with a guy she really liked (Got that from her head, also got her stream of unspoken obscenities). After a few hours of various scatterbrained antics on my part, Sam told me to take a break and I didn't argue. He kept looking at me, and I think he knew something was up, but bless him, he didn't ask. We hadn't been alone at all, though, so maybe he was just waiting for a better time to approach me. I wasn't sure what I would tell him. Sam was my friend and I didn't want to lie, but some things are just simply better left unsaid. (I should have heeded that advice last night and saved myself a truckload of trouble)

And that brought me here, taking a break out back of Merlotte's. It was chilly, but not so bad as last night. The snow was still around. There was just a little accumulation, but it was enough to keep most people at home. I frowned. My tips would be minimal.

I stood outside in the brisk air, hands in my coat pockets, and stared out into the sky. The sun was just about to set, and I felt a warmth stir in my heart. Eric would be rising any minute now. He told me I would be the first thought he had when he woke, and I hoped that was more than just an idle and meaningless whispering. I stood there a bit longer than I really should have as I waited for the last rays of the day to fade away. Just as dark descended I closed my eyes, pictured Eric's face and smiled. I would like to think he was doing the same thing about me at the same moment.

I forced myself to calm down, reminded myself I had customers that were paying for attentive service, and I walked back inside. I shrugged off my coat and plastered my best smile on my face and went back to work. Sam touched my arm as I walked past him and I turned to him.

"You okay?" he asked me quietly.

"I'm great, Sam. Just have some things on my mind. I'm sorry about that mess with the beer." Sam had waived the bill for that girl and her date.

My boss just smiled, but there was concern in his eyes. "I'm not worried about that, I'm worried about you."

That made two of us. But Sam didn't need my drama.

"I'm fine, really." Any further conversation was halted as I heard my name being called. I winked at my boss. "I need to check my tables."

The next several hours were typical blur of beer and baskets and busing. About eight thirty or so the door opened and I was only a little surprised to see Bill walk in. But the vampire he walked in with was a definite shock. I recognized him immediately as Russell Edgington, King of Mississippi and he was sporting a full length coat and hat and carrying what looked like a briefcase. The two vampires sat down in my section and I headed over, hoping I didn't look as confused as I felt seeing those two together.

Bill acknowledged me with the slightest of smiles and a nod, but the King stood up and favored me with a huge grin and a flourishy little bow.

"Ah, Miss Stackhouse, it's wonderful to see you again." He was playing the southern gentleman, again. It was hokey, but somehow it suited him. I inclined my head respectfully.

"It's nice to see you, too Mr. Edgington. I'm real surprised to see you here in Bon Temps."

The king laughed and sat back down. "I was in New Orleans to meet some business associates and I decided to take a quick stop to come see Bill."

I looked at Bill but his face gave away nothing and I was at a loss. The situation was just altogether weird. Bill had been tortured at Russell's compound, Russell had allowed said torture, and I had broken in and killed the torturer and dumped her in his pool.

And everybody is okay with that...? It appeared so.

Well, alrighty then.

"So what I get for you gentlemen this evening?" I asked pleasantly. Bill ordered a bottle of O positive (he still orders my blood type, which I thought was kinda sweet in a creepy way) and Russell opted for A negative. I did a quick check of my other tables then went to heat up the blood.

"Who is that with Bill?" Sam asked me and I told him. He didn't look too happy, but I could hardly blame him. The last time a vampire king was in town Sam had been bound to the back of his own truck in the parking lot of his own bar with prospects of being killed.

"Don't worry," I assured him. "I don't think they will be staying long."

My boss didn't look convinced, and of course I really had no idea how long the vampires would be here. I was only guessing, but as it turned out I'd been right. When I was on my way back to their table I saw Bill get up and head for the door, a phone at his ear. I looked after him for just a minute before sitting the blood on the table for Russell.

"Bill had to take a call," the King told me, even though I hadn't asked. He was looking at me with a strange expression, almost confused, like he was trying to figure out a puzzle. I just smiled.

"Are you staying in Louisiana long?" I asked, trying to sound casual. Russell took a swig of the blood and then shook his head.

"No. As a matter of fact I'm heading back home as soon in as I finish up my business with Bill. I went to Shreveport to pay a visit to your Sheriff last night, but I'm afraid I missed him."

"Oh." I couldn't think of another thing to say. I knew my cheeks were turning red. Russell's eyes widened a bit at my reaction and he leaned forward slightly.

"Bill is going to be doing some work for me," he explained, though once again I hadn't asked. It was very odd to have a vampire, especially a vampire king, volunteer information like this. I wondered if maybe being an old married man now had softened him. Russell continued. "I needed some help with a new computer system I'm setting up and Felipe' was gracious enough to let me hire Bill." I wondered how big a cut of Bill's money Felipe' would be graciously accepting.

I grinned my crazy grin. Russell was still looking at me with that confused expression. "Well, that's just great. Bill knows his stuff."

"I'm glad you think so," said that unmistakable cool voice. My former boyfriend had slipped back in and was standing right at my shoulder. I hesitated, then moved aside a little bit so Bill could slide back in his seat. Russell placed the briefcase on the table and snapped open the latches. That was my cue to leave.

"Let me know if y'all need a refill."

I hustled away after that, only returning to their table a couple times to check up on their drinks. The two vampires were all business now, hunkered down over some paperwork, and talking in voices so low no human could possibly hear a word. They finished up whatever they were discussing after about an hour or so and Russell came to find me just before he departed.

"It was a pleasure, Miss Stackhouse," he told me in his southern drawl. "I hope to see you again sometime. And please do give my regards to Eric."

I flushed. I wondered if my thing with Eric had been broadcast on KDED. I wouldn't put it past Pam.

"Yes sir," I said with a smile "I will do that, if I see him." I put an emphasis on the _if_. "And it was nice to see you, too."

The King of Mississippi smiled gently, gave a little nod and headed for the door. Bill remained parked at the table, I noticed. I did another round at my tables then wandered over to him.

"That was a little weird," I said as quietly as I could. Bill nodded but his eyes didn't touch my face. I looked down and saw he was staring at the silver bracelets on my wrist. Crap.

"Sookie," he said, raising his gaze "I spoke to Pam, she relayed a message from Eric. He would like me to escort you home tonight when you get off work."

Double crap. Bill's face was calm, but I knew him well enough to know he wasn't happy.

"I don't know what's going on, Sookie," he continued, "And I'm guessing you're going to tell me it's nothing and not to worry."

That was, actually, exactly what I was planning to tell him.

"I don't know what's going on either, Bill," I told him and that was pretty close to the truth. I hadn't heard a peep from Eric tonight so I had no clue what, if anything, he had discovered concerning Victor. I looked around and saw one of the regulars hold up an empty glass. "I got to get back to work. You really don't have to hang around here all night. I'm sure I'll be fine."

Bill sat back purposefully and his face locked down. "Yes, I really do have to hang around here. And I will see you home."

There was no arguing when Bill got that look, so I just nodded and hurried over to tend my other customers. I was having more and more difficulty maintaining my perky waitress routine as the night wore on. At some point Bill left, but I knew he was probably just outside in his car waiting for me. I felt terrible about the situation with my ex. I had a feeling that Bill knew Eric had stayed at my house last night. Bill swore he still wanted to be with me, so that had to have cut deep. And despite our history, I felt for him. I hated remembering how that awful Selah would sometimes answer the phone at Bill's house when I called at night. And how much more would it have sucked if I had to work for and take orders from Selah? The thought made me shudder. The whole situation must be eating Bill up from the inside out. I just hated that.

The rest of my night went by slowly, but finally the last person left and Sam locked up the front door. We talked some while we cleaned up and re-stocked, but I wasn't really in the chit-chatty mood. Sam picked up on that and didn't try to force conversation. That was one of the things I really liked about my boss. I could always be myself around Sam, I never felt like I had to justify myself or my moods to him. Most of the time, at least.

I was right about the tips, too. Even after I added in my hourly waitress salary I barely made minimum wage tonight. And I wouldn't have made that if not for Russell tipping me a twenty. I hoped the snow melted soon.

When the last salt shaker was topped off and all the napkin holders had been filled, I trudged back to Sam's office and grabbed my coat and purse. I hollered out to Sam to let him know I was leaving and went outside to find Bill leaning against my car. I looked around.

"Where's your car?" I asked.

"Russell's driver brought us here tonight."

Oh, just great. "You should've stayed inside. It's too cold to just stand out here."

Bill dismissed my admonition with a wave of his hand. "It's fine. Would you like me to drive?"

I knew he wasn't asking to drive because he was male, he was just showing consideration for me since I'd been on my feet all night. I knew it would make him happy, so I handed over my keys. It's always a little weird to ride in the passenger seat of your own car, isn't it?

We drove in silence for several minutes. I looked over at Bill and he was softly glowing, as always. His profile was handsome, his hair was neatly combed, as always. So much about him would never change, I thought to myself. I had a sudden mental image of Bill standing in the Bon Temps cemetery between our homes, looking just as he does now, gazing at a headstone with my name inscribed. I felt suddenly sad, but not for myself.

He must have sensed me staring at him, and he turned to me. It was only briefly, but long enough for those dark eyes to open up the floodgate and I found I couldn't _not_ talk to him.

"I want to thank you again for what you did for me last night," I told him. I had no idea what I was expecting him to say. I wasn't even sure what I wanted him to say. I just knew that I wanted to make things right between us, or at least as right as things could be under the circumstances. Was it closure I was needing here maybe? I had never had an ex-boyfriend, not like Bill. I was in uncharted territory.

He was quiet for a bit before he finally spoke. "I didn't really do anything."

"You stayed with me," I insisted.

"Eric stayed longer."

Ouch.

I closed my eyes, then turned to look out the side window. I didn't respond. The silence dragged.

"I'm sorry," Bill said at last. "That was unfair."

Yes, it was, but it was also accurate. Any doubts I had about Bill knowing exactly when Eric had left my house vanished. I remember seeing Selah's car driving away from Bill's house a few times in the early morning hours and it burned me. We had been broken up for a while at that point (and I had been the one to do the breaking) My head knew it was ridiculous to be jealous but my heart never got the memo.

"I saw you," Bill continued, his voice quiet and even. I turned to look at him, confused. He glanced at me. "Last night when you were outside in the snow. I saw you."

I cringed and was grateful it was dark inside the car so Bill couldn't see my face turn red. Emotional or not, taking off after Eric like that had not been one of my brighter moments.

"I also saw Eric come and get you," Bill continued. I sighed. Could this get any worse?

"I'm sorry you had to see that," I told him. We were turning onto my driveway now and the car rumbled loudly through the gravel. Bill stopped the car in my usual spot, put the gear in park and turned off the lights, but left the motor running. For the heater, I assumed. He turned to me as much as he could in the small car.

"I'm glad I saw what I did," he began, and his voice was strong. "I was coming to find you. I've had your blood and you mine. I knew you were in pain, and it wasn't just from the cold. And when I saw Eric pick you up to take you home, I knew..." he paused, seemed to take an unnecessary breath to gather himself. "I knew how you felt about him."

This was a pretty big detour from the conversation I was expecting to have, but it wasn't as strange or awkward as I would have anticipated. I had softened toward Bill over the past several months, starting the night of the takeover. I had no desire to cause him pain, and I most certainly had no intentions of flaunting another man in his face, especially Eric. The little anti-Bill voice in my head was chattering, reminding me of all the times Bill had brought Selah into Merlotte's while I was working, but I ignored it.

"I never wanted to hurt you," I told him.

"And I never wanted to hurt you," he said. "But I did. And there is not a night that passes that I don't regret that."

I shook my head, not wanting yet another repeat performance of his apology and my dismissal of said apology. "I know," I said simply.

"Do you, Sookie?" he pressed. "Do you truly know how very sorry I am?"

I should have just let it go. I should have just gotten out of the car and walked into the house, but I didn't. If closure was in fact what I was after, I might as well just lay it all on the table. That was my reasoning, anyway.

"I do believe you," I said, and I held up a hand so he knew I wasn't finished yet. "And I understand - sort of - why you had to come here when the Queen ordered it. I know more about the politics in your world now, and I get that you didn't really have a choice. I even understand why you had to go to Lorena when she wanted you." I thought back to how Eric had called me, the incredible power it held and I shivered. Bill's face was almost hopeful, and I hated to dash it. "But you told me you loved me..."

Bill interrupted me. "I _do_ love you."

I stared at him. I was getting side-tracked, but I decided to follow it. "And when, exactly, did you decide you loved me?"

Bill couldn't have looked more pained. He didn't want to go down this path, that much was clear.

"I knew the first night I met you that you were different," he answered.

I shook my head. "That isn't the same as loving me." I steadied myself, not really wanting to ask my next question. "How about the first night we slept together?"

Bill's expression changed, and his eyes softened. He reached over tentatively and touched my cheek with the back of the fingers. "Oh, Sookie. I wish you would have told me," he whispered.

I lowered my head and pulled away from his touch. "I'll take that as a no."

"It wasn't long after that I knew I loved you," he said softly.

I barked out an unamused laugh. "That's great. It's nice to know I gave up my virginity to a guy that almost loved me." My voice was quivering and I hoped I didn't cry. I had suspected this, of course, but hearing it was not fun.

"You have no idea how it's tormented me, Sookie," Bill said. "I would give everything I have to change what happened between us."

I made an erase movement with my hand, and took a breath. "Alright, forget about that for now. What I really want to know, what I don't understand, is that if you really did come to love me as you claim - whenever it happened - why didn't you tell me about the Queen's orders? How could you look me in the face every day and not tell me if you honestly did love me?"

Bill looked away. "I couldn't."

"I deserved to know."

Bill looked back. "Yes, you did. I almost told you so many times, but I knew you wouldn't understand and I didn't want to lose you. I was a fool, and I was a coward." A sad smile appeared on his face. "But Eric is not."

My eyes went wide.

"When I saw him take you away last night, I knew he would share your bed. When I realized how you felt about him, I knew he would be in your heart. I can't tell you how it felt, seeing him holding you, knowing he had found what I had lost. But I had no anger in me, not toward you or Eric. My only thought was I hoped he could find a way to love you as you deserve." Bill stopped and his eyes looked far away for a moment. "I know it's too late for us. I've accepted that. I do hope that one day you will find it in your heart to forgive me. I know we can't go back, but I want to have you in my life, as much or as little as you desire."

I closed my eyes and leaned back heavily against the seat. Sitting here with Bill, listening to his cool voice and hearing the words he was speaking, I found I had no desire to hold onto my anger. I just didn't have it in me anymore. I knew I would never forget what Bill had done, but I began to think that maybe I didn't need to forget in order to forgive. Maybe I needed to remember it all and just...let it go. As I considered that, a wave of peacefulness swept through me and I suddenly felt about ten pounds lighter. I smiled, rolled my head on the seat to look at my first love.

"You could have lied, you know," I said and Bill looked at me, confused. "When I asked you if you loved me that first time we were together, you could have lied."

"Yes, and I very nearly did. I didn't want to hurt you. But what I truly wish is that I could have told you yes, and had it be the truth."

"I'll take a hard truth over an easy lie any day," I stated, then I looked at Bill, stared into his dark eyes. "I forgive you," I told him and I swear as soon as I said the words I felt like I could actually breathe a little easier. "This is really new to me so I'm not sure what happens now. Is this the part where we say we'll be friends?"

Bill smiled a bit, and it touched his eyes this time. "This is the part when I thank you, and tell you I will never betray your trust again."

We sat there for a minute or so, not talking, and just as it was getting a bit awkward, I glanced at the clock on the dash and Bill took the hint. He turned off the engine and handed me my keys.

"I'll be close if you need me," he said, his tone heavy.

"Thanks. I'm sorry you're stuck on baby-sitting detail tonight," I said. I was trying to joke with him but he didn't look happy.

"I wish I knew what was going on," he told me, and there was some bite behind the words.

I didn't blame him a bit. It's no fun being out of the loop, but the less he knew about my situation the safer he would be, so I just nodded and reached for the door.

"Sookie," he whispered, and I froze. I recognized the emotion behind his voice immediately. I knew I shouldn't turn back to him, but I did. He was leaned over toward me so when I turned my head we were just inches apart. He raised one hand and pulled me to him and I didn't resist. Our lips touched, just for a moment or two, gently. A wave of memories flooded into me and they weren't sad, or passionate or angry. They were just memories.

We pulled back at the same moment, looked at each other. Something was changed between us, and we both felt it.

"Good bye, Bill." I smiled a little.

"Good bye, Sookie," he responded quietly.

We got out of my car and I headed up the steps to the back door. I didn't turn around to look, but I knew Bill was watching me to make sure I got inside okay.

The house was dark and quiet, as expected. Octavia usually turned in early, and Amelia was rarely up past midnight unless she had a date. I shrugged off my coat and tiptoed down the hall to my bedroom. I changed into pajamas and took off all the silver jewelry I had worn but, thankfully, had not needed. I brushed my teeth, washed my face and took my phone out of my purse to charge it.

I noticed I had a missed call from Fangtasia and the little voicemail symbol on the phone was flashing. I smiled. I hadn't expected to hear from Eric tonight, but I'd been hoping. I didn't want to make assumptions and Eric and I hadn't really talked much about the specifics of our relationship (other than admitting we shared feelings for one another.) I didn't expect he would start calling me every day and taking me out every weekend. Eric wasn't a typical guy so I wasn't expecting to have a typical relationship with him and I was fine with that, for now.

I snuggled down into the covers and said my prayers, then I picked up my cell phone and punched in the code for voicemail retrieval.

_You have one new message_, the electronic voice informed me. Then I heard Eric's voice and I couldn't help but smile. He must have been calling from his office; I could hear the music from the bar muted in the background. It's pretty hard to sound sexy on a cell phone recording, but somehow Eric managed it.

_"Hello, lover. You are at work, and if my information is correct the shifter's bar is enjoying the patronage of a certain king. You will tell him I'm terribly disappointed that I missed his visit last night, won't you?_

The way he said it made it clear he was anything but terribly disappointed.

_I'm looking into a few things here in Shreveport and I will call you as time allows. Sleep well tonight in safety and dream of me. _

Ha! I was already planning on it. I flipped off the phone and put it back on the nightstand. Eric's message was a cryptic mix of innuendo, which was just pure Eric. What I heard was that Eric was on top of things in Shreveport, and Bill was standing watch here. Plus, I was in a house warded by two witches so I was feeling pretty cozy as I flipped over my pillow and closed my eyes.

I slept well.

_-_

_To be continued_

_Don't hate me. Please :D_


	14. Chapter 14

Know Thyself

Chapter Fourteen

I missed Eric.

"You miss Eric, don't you?"

Amelia's question barely registered.

"Huh?"

My roommate laughed. "Sookie, you've been staring into the refrigerator for about five minutes, do you even realize that?"

I blinked. I had come into the kitchen to look for something, preferably something chocolate. My mind was elsewhere tonight, though. It had taken a vacation to Shreveport and left my body behind.

Three nights. It had been three solid nights since I had last heard from Eric and I was starting to get concerned. No, scratch that. I was concerned after the _first_ night, the second night I had moved on to worry and now I was just downright annoyed.

I kept telling myself I had no reason to be upset. It wasn't at all unusual for Eric not to contact me, and in the past we rarely saw one another unless it was for a specific purpose. But, I lamented, that was before.

Before what, exactly?

Before he had come to me and told me he wanted me, before I had decided I wanted him, too. Before we had made love and held one another and spoken so tenderly. The part of my heart that belonged to that big Viking was aching with curious abandonment.

I had been trying to keep myself busy as much as possible, and that hadn't been to hard until tonight. The past several days I had fallen into a strange sort of routine. I had worked every day from four thirty until close at Merlotte's, and each night Bill would be waiting for me by my car to drive me home. Then I would get ready for bed, read a chapter or two in my new romance book, check my cell phone for missed calls and messages - again - and be disappointed when there weren't any. Then I'd turn off the lights, cuddle under the covers and wonder what the hell was going on.

I had been pretty tough for a few days. Eric was a vampire Sheriff, I told myself sternly, and I shouldn't expect him to drop everything just because we had spent a wonderful night together. I knew what I was getting myself into, right? This was exactly why I had pushed him away for so long, because he was immersed deeply in vamp politics and that came first for him. Yes, I had finally stopped fighting it and admitted I cared for him and needed him, but did that mean he was going to change overnight? Is that what I was really expecting to happen?

Yeah, I thought sadly to myself. That was exactly what I was expecting on some level. And how was I handling reality when it stared me in the face? I was standing in front of the refrigerator looking for comfort food - for five minutes, apparently. That explained why I was chilled, at least. I puffed out an exasperated sigh and slammed the door much harder than was necessary. Amelia snickered.

"Why don't you just call him?"

Oh, wow! As if I hadn't thought about doing _that_ a hundred times.

"He knows my number," I said tartly.

"Yeah, and you know his."

I started to argue, but stopped. The witch had a valid point. Why was I waiting around for him to contact me, anyway? I was an adult. Why was I moping around acting like some helpless Disney princess, waiting for her prince to come and save her from overdosing on chocolate?

I turned to my roommate. "You know what? I am gonna call him, right now." I turned and marched purposefully out of the kitchen, saying Hello to Tray on the way to my room. He was sitting on the sofa waiting for Amelia; they had a stay-at-home date night planned, from the looks of things. There was a bag of take-out and some rental movies sitting on the table and Tray had kicked off his shoes. Octavia had already retired for the evening.

I shut the door to my bedroom and sat down on the bed, phone in hand. I dialed the number to Fangtasia and it only rang once before a female voice answered I didn't recognize. I asked for Eric and my heart sped up when the female put me on hold and went to see if 'the master' was available to take a call. Minutes passed and I got an uneasy feeling. The last time it took him this long to answer the phone Eric had told me he was 'having supper'. (in more ways than one, no doubt) It had merely irked me before, but now...well, I wasn't sure how I would respond. Or how I _should_ respond, for that matter. More minutes passed and just as I was about to hang up in a huff the phone clicked back over.

"I'm sorry Miss, but the master has stepped out. Could someone else assist you?"

Hmph, at least she was more polite than most of the people they got to answer the phone. I sighed, told her 'No, thank you' and flipped off the phone. I flopped down on my bed and stared at the ceiling. I was off work tonight and it wasn't late, not even ten o'clock yet, so I was wide awake. I wondered if Bill was hanging around outside, or if he had gone home. He was still under orders to keep an eye on me, he said, so I assumed he was close by. I briefly considered going out to talk to him but I was too depressed. Yes, I missed Eric. Very much.

I spent the next hour or so reading, then I took a long shower to relax and got ready for bed. I pulled on my favorite nightgown - faded and frayed, but oh so soft and comfortable. I checked my phone just once more for missed calls, turned out the lights and closed my eyes. I could hear the television, could heard Amelia and Tray quietly talking and sometimes laughing, and I had a pang of jealousy. I sat back up and clicked on the radio on the alarm clock and adjusted the volume so it was just loud enough to distract me from happy date night. It took a bit, but after a while I was asleep and dreaming.

My dream was a nice one. I was wrapped in warmth and safety, and I felt strong hands stroking my arms and kissing my cheek, my neck, my shoulder. I smiled, knowing even in sleep it was my Eric. I could almost smell his unique scent it was so real. I released a contented little sigh, hoping never to wake.

After a few moments, the feel of hands on my skin became stronger, the smells were more real, the feelings more intense. I stretched a bit, arching my back and then rolling over onto my side. I felt my hair being pulled away from my face and then I felt lips right at my ear.

"Wake, my lover."

The voice was soft and full of warmth and I smiled. This was no dream.

Eric draped his arm around me so his hand was near my face. I snuggled into him, my back to his chest, and eventually my eyes opened. The first thing I saw was a strong forearm and thick wrist. I placed my own arm near his, laid my hand on top of his, and had a rosy, half awake moment of amusement when I saw how tiny mine looked compared to his. I giggled.

"Hi," I said sleepily, still in that hazy half-awake state.

Eric chuckled quietly, kissed my neck just below my ear and nuzzled his face in my hair, breathing in my scent. He moved his hand to my hip, then to my leg. He pushed up my nightgown and stroked the outside of my thigh slowly a few times, then moved up and ran his hands along the curve of my hip. Yes, I was definitely starting to wake up now. I rolled onto my back and looked up at him, and he rested his hand on my belly. He was propped on his side, his hair was falling forward and he had a gentle smile on his face. He kissed my lips, parted them and moved his hand down to my undies.

"I want to be near you," he said quietly, as he tugged gently at my panties. I raised my hips and wiggled, helping him as he slid them off. He sat up some and I saw his chest was bare, which made me smile. Somewhere in the back of my mind I remembered I was irritated with Eric, but I decided I would just be angry later. My eyes were adjusting to the darkness in the room and I admired his body as he raised me to a sitting position. Mmmmm. The rest of him was bare, too. I lifted my arms and Eric silently pulled my gown up and over my head and tossed it away, then he looked at me and did a little admiring of his own.

He pulled me close to him and laid me back down, keeping my body pressed against his. I could feel the curly blond hair on his chest, and I liked the way it felt against my breasts. We lay on our side, facing one another. He ran his hand up and down my back as we kissed, over and over.

"How did you get in here?" I asked him quietly in between kisses.

"The witch let me in."

His fangs had run out and I felt my own body responding to his touch. I molded myself against him, and stroked his arm, kissed his shoulder and then brought my leg up and hitched it around his hip. Eric made a happy noise as part of my body, the soft and wet and warm and inviting part, lightly brushed up against part of him. He reached his arm around me to cup my bottom, he adjusted his position slightly and in one swift movement he was inside me. I gasped. He smiled.

We stayed like that for a moment, not moving, just laying there, joined. I had to raise my head to look him the eyes now. My lips parted and I sighed, then he rolled a bit so I was almost fully on my back, but not quite. I kept my leg up around his hip, and he kept one hand under my bottom and kneaded it as he started to move slowly in and out. I could feel every inch of him.

"I was told I had to be nice," he whispered, never taking his eyes from my face.

He thrust into me, paused. Pulled out, paused. Every movement was torturously slow.

"Who told you that?" I breathed, but I knew it had to Amelia. My voice was a little ragged, my body more than a little excited. Eric kept moving, keeping that leisurely pace. His eyes were full of heat.

"I was told I was being a _jerk_," he continued quietly, smirking. He pushed into me deeply, held it. I tried to move my hips, but his grip on my bottom was too strong so I was at his mercy. I wanted to cry, I was so on fire for him. Finally he started moving again and I closed my eyes in ecstasy. Thrust, pause, repeat. It was agonizingly perfect.

"Look at me," he instructed, and I did. It was hard to keep my eyes open. He felt so good I just wanted to lose myself. But still, looking in his eyes when we were like this was incredibly intimate, very erotic, like nothing else I had ever experienced.

"So tell me, how am I being a jerk, lover?" His voice was husky with his arousal. He pushed hard, ground his hips into me. Oh God, did he really want to have a conversation about this _now_?

"You...haven't called me," I answered, gasping. Thrust, hold.

"You have been working, have you not?" He looked down, and so did I. My breasts were pressed up against him, giving them a very full, cushiony appearance that Eric seemed to really appreciate. A groan rumbled in his chest. He started moving again, and I could swear it was even slower than before.

"Yes," I finally answered, breathing heavily. I could feel my release building up deep inside me. He felt so wonderful, part of me was aching for completion while part of me never wanted this to stop. He pushed in deeply, slowly, and then pressed against me a few times, pulled back, paused. Did it again and again until I thought I would go insane. I tried to close my eyes a few times but each time he would kiss me and let his fangs scrape against the inside of my bottom lip, just enough to get my attention so I would look at him again.

"You would like this," he asked and I was glad to hear the slight shake in his own voice. "If I called you, even on nights you work?" Thrust, hold.

"Yes," I said softly. "I would like that." He started moving again and he was gripping me even harder. He kissed my lips, moved his mouth to my neck.

"This is important to you?" he asked. His lips brushed my skin as he spoke and I couldn't tell if he was teasing me. He pushed into me again and stopped, ground his hips against me, making me gasp.

"Are you making fun of me?" I asked breathlessly.

Eric kissed my neck one last time, then looked at me, his face very close to mine.

"No," he said. "It's been a long time since I've any sort of....romantic entanglement." He pushed hard once again, held it. "I might be a little out of practice." He pulled back, almost out of me and I whimpered a protest. He paused again, hovered right at my entrance. He smiled down at me. "I don't wish to cause you distress..." He pushed back into me fully and I exhaled contentedly. "...so you must tell me if I've done something to upset you."

"I wasn't...really...upset," I managed to say. "I just missed you." I was having some trouble forming coherent sentences now. He moved again, so slowly, and he ran his hands along my backside from shoulders to thigh, pausing to squeeze my bottom firmly, pulling me even closer to him. This slow pace was maddening.

"You are always in my thoughts," he whispered, his eyes searching my face. "Even when I try to banish you from them, you're still there, inside me, taunting me." He thrust again, even harder, once, twice and then again in rapid succession and I almost went over the edge but then he slowed again. I wanted to wail with frustration.

"You want to forget me?" I asked in a quivering voice and I ran my nails along his back, found my favorite part and did a little squeezing of my own. His expression turned wild for a moment, then he recovered.

"No, my lover," he answered thickly. He pushed into me deeply and held it. "I want to possess you. Every part of you." He pushed again, held it. "I want to claim you as mine and keep you by my side. I want to kill anyone who dares to lay hands on you." He was nearly growling the words and he was thrusting hard inside me now, over and over. I strained my neck, trying to reach his lips. He met me halfway and I felt his tongue dance in my mouth. I felt him shudder a little with unmistakable need. Our kiss broke and we looked at one another. He licked his lips, slowed down again, even slower than before. I was ready to burst into flames, every nerve ending I had was flashing and I knew my body couldn't take much more of this. It was painful. It was exciting.

I pulled my arm from around him and stroked his hair, his face, then put my hand to his mouth. He kissed my fingers, his tongue darting out a few times to give a quick lick, his eyes never leaving mine. There was a desperate hunger in those blue eyes that I recognized immediately. I rolled my head back slightly, exposing my neck in offering.

"Take me, Eric" I whispered the command, then even more softly said "I'm yours."

Eric was silent for a moment, then made a long, groaning sound that seemed to come from somewhere deep inside him. He released his grip on my bottom and grabbed my hand that was at his mouth and held it above my head. He repositioned his weight and rolled onto me fully, using his knees to open my legs wide, our bodies still joined. I raised my hips, and he pushed deeply into me, still moving slowly, still looking in my eyes. Then he took his hand and raised my chin, moved my head to the side and bit. I gasped and I could feel a powerful wave of ecstasy roll over me through our bond as he drank from me. He didn't take much, just drew on the wounds a few times before licking them and licking his lips, then he was kissing me with a crazed fervor.

His movements were coming faster now, my blood seemed to be driving him, and I felt my body start to shake with imminent release. He broke off our kiss suddenly, and his eyes were excited when he looked down into mine. He pressed hard against me a few times and I was just gone. My entire body clenched, my back arched, and I wailed as I was lost in an explosion of pleasure.

Eric's moment was right behind mine. He buried himself inside me and cried out in his ancient language, closing his eyes. He collapsed on top of me and I nuzzled my face into his shoulder as our bodies trembled with aftershocks. I was so relaxed and content I was almost purring.

We stayed like that for a few minutes, then Eric pulled out and away from me slowly, and I felt a momentary sadness at the loss of our physical connection. He shifted back to lay on his side, keeping one arm across my waist. He was so beautiful, I thought to myself. He was strong, and powerful and he was mine. Well, technically, I was _his_ - at least that was what I had just told him. Then I cringed. Did I really say that? Did I really mean it? Want it? I had a moment of pure panic. Maybe there was an escape clause for this in the relationship manual - you know, things said while on the verge of orgasm don't really count. Or maybe he'll just forgot.

"Did you mean it, Sookie?" Eric asked me after a moment, very gently. "Are you giving yourself to me?"

So much for Eric forgetting. I should have known I wouldn't get off that easily. But, he was asking me now - now that we were sated and thinking more clearly. He was giving me an out if I wanted to take it. But my heart spoke before my brain could catch up.

"Yes," I murmured "I guess maybe I am."

Eric reached over and put one big hand on my cheek. He smiled, a real smile without the fangs.

"I would want to claim you as my own now," he said, his eyes boring into mine. "You understand what that would mean for us?"

Something in his voice gave me pause. My eyes narrowed.

"No," I said slowly. "Maybe you should explain what that means, exactly." I sat up a bit, propped myself on my elbow. Eric did likewise.

"I am Sheriff. Those that owe me loyalty would be required to show respect for things I deem to be dear and valuable. And even those to whom I owe fealty would have to honor our relationship according to vampire tradition."

"Okay," I said, feeling a little better. "That doesn't sound so bad." I hesitated, and my brow furrowed. "Except that part about showing respect. No one would have to bow to me or anything, would they?"

Eric laughed and kissed me. "No, dear one. You are not vampire. What I want you to understand is that you would be considered one of my personal possessions."

I groaned. Here we go. "Eric, come on. Do you know what century this is?"

"I do," he said, and there was no amusement in his voice. "You told me just this evening that certain things are important to you, did you not?"

I must have looked confused because Eric prompted me. "You said you would like me to contact you more often, now that we have a more...personal relationship."

"Well, yeah," I admitted "It would be a nice gesture. But what does that have to do with.."

"And I will do that for you," Eric interrupted "because it's something you deem important, even though I personally think it's ridiculous."

I opened my eyes wide, offended. "You think it's ridiculous that I would want to see you and hear from you more often than just when....well, when you decide you want to have sex and dinner?"

I knew I had made a bad, bad choice of words as soon as they left my mouth. Eric's face went hard and he sat up against the headboard and looked down at me.

"First of all," he said, and his voice was fiery "I can easily have _sex _and _dinner_ any night I like without coming all the way to Bon Temps."

I winced. I really, really didn't need to hear that. But it was my own fault; I had opened that can of worms myself. My face must have revealed my hurt, because he lowered his voice and his tone softened somewhat.

"What I think is ridiculous is the notion that the quantity of my contact with you- either through a phone call or a personal visit - in some way has the power to define or determine the extent of my feelings for you." He paused to let that sink in, then he smiled a bit. "But since this is something that is important to you, I will make an effort to accommodate your request."

I knew exactly where he was heading with this now, and I knew right then I had been out-maneuvered. Never, ever play chess with a thousand year old Viking, that's all I'm going to say.

I sat up. "So what you're saying is, just because I think this 'personal possession' concept is ridiculous _and_ demeaning and a _complete_ throwback to the dark ages, since it's important to _you_, I should just accept it."

Eric beamed at me. "Yes."

I shook my head, fell back onto the pillow. Eric leaned over me, his blue eyes blazing.

"Say you will be mine, Sookie."

I looked at him for a long time and he didn't say a word, just waited. I hated this crap, I really did. She is mine; he is mine, mine, mine, mine. Like a two-year-old's dream. But darn if I didn't want to say yes to him, crazy as it was. My inner cave-woman was ready to kick the crap out of me but, I decided, if Eric and I were going to give this a serious go, there were a few things I was just going to have to get used to. Compromise is at the heart of a relationship, right? Oh, _hell_.

"Alright, Eric," I said finally. "I will be yours." I smiled, just a little, but rolled my eyes to show him exactly how not thrilled I was with his quaint little vampire tradition. Eric didn't care, though. He kissed me for all he was worth - which was quite a lot - and when he pulled away his eyes were shining with victory.

"My Sookie," he said quietly, but he wasn't really addressing me. It was like he was trying out the words, seeing how they fit. He looked pleased and for whatever reason- blood bond, true affection or both- I was happy that he was happy.

Eric's head turned suddenly. Clearly his vampire hearing had picked up something mine hadn't.

"What?" I asked and he just shook his head.

"My phone."

He must have it set to vibrate because I sure didn't hear a ring. "You need to get it?"

"No. I already spoke to the other Sheriff in the chain tonight, and Victor. Whoever it is can wait."

I sat up, pulling the covers up around me.

"You talked to Victor?"

"He checks in every night, as always."

"And...?" I prompted. This was kind of important, wasn't it?

Eric's face got that vampire look and I had no idea what he might be thinking.

"And," Eric stated slowly, "Victor is being Victor. He's being overly polite, not unusual. And he's revealing nothing, also not unusual. I've been keeping watch on him and his dealings very closely. He has not approached the King about you as far as I can tell."

"That's good, right?"

Eric paused a moment. "If he was planning to tell Felipe' he would have done it already. If he were to go to the King now, it would not be good for him. The King would demand to know why he kept such important information to himself for so long."

"And Victor wouldn't risk the King's suspicion?" I asked and Eric nodded.

I brightened. "So that narrows things down then. That's one route you know he won't take. That's progress, correct?"

Eric nodded, looked at me, amused. "You have developed quite the devious mind."

"Too much Eric blood in me, I suppose," I said with a smile and Eric grinned hugely. Then, without warning, he moved at vampire speed and lifted me up and pulled me onto his lap. He kissed me tenderly, then looked at me with quite a serious expression..

"I want to tell you something, my Sookie." He sounded like the Sheriff just then, but he was stroking my back in a soothing way.

"Okay," I said warily, and I nodded at him to go on.

"I'm going to travel to Nevada, to talk to Felipe' DeCastro in person."

"About what?"

"Do you remember what I told you, about having an ace in the hole?"

I nodded, tried not to grin. I still thought that phrase sounded funny coming from Eric. "I remember."

"I want to explain that to you, and I want you to try to understand. I'll need you to trust me."

His emotions were all over the place all of a sudden, I could feel it through our bond, too many to decipher. Hope was there, excitement and something else. Fear, maybe? But that seemed unlikely coming from Eric.

"I trust you," I said and his eyes turned soft, and more emotion flared through our bond.

Before he could begin his explanation though, his phone vibrated again and he cursed in another language - at least I assumed it was a curse. I still couldn't hear the phone - it must have been in the pocket of his jacket, which was lying in the chair across the room along with his clothes. Eric glanced over and then looked at me apologetically.

"Maybe you should just answer it," I suggested and Eric agreed. He tossed back the covers and stood up. Moonlight was coming in from the windows and bathed his impressive form with a soft glow. The view as he walked across the room was spectacular and I leered at him openly.

Then all at once there was a frantic pounding on the door of the bedroom, and Amelia was yelling at me to open up. My heart leapt, Eric froze and I fumbled out of the bed, telling Amelia to hold on for just a minute. I pulled one of the sheets clear off the bed and wrapped in around me hurriedly. I opened the door, Amelia was standing there and her face was horrified. I put my hand to my mouth and gasped, hearing her thoughts before she spoke. I looked back at Eric, who had already managed to pull on his jeans.

"What's happened?" he demanded and Amelia stepped into the room.

"It was just on the news," she nearly screamed. "The Fellowship are attacking vampire businesses all over the state! There are fires and some bombs..."

Amelia didn't get a chance to say another word. Eric grabbed the rest of his clothes and pushed by us, his cell phone already at his ear. I ran down the hall, not caring a bit that Tray was still here, and Octavia had woken up with all the commotion and I was standing in the middle of them all, wrapped only in a sheet.

Eric watched the television for a few moments while talking to someone on the phone - Pam, I assumed. There was footage of police cars and fire trucks, people on stretchers, buildings and vampires burning. Some of the places I recognized. Eric had never looked more dangerous, and his fangs had descended. I heard him say he was on the way, and he flipped his phone shut, turned to me, kissed me fully on the mouth, then turned to leave.

Amelia opened the door for Eric, and when she did I saw Bill standing on the porch, looking just as dangerous as Eric. He glanced at me, took in my haphazard appearance and then looked at Eric, who was still half dressed as well. His expression never changed.

"Was Fangtasia hit?" Bill asked, the question we were all wondering.

"Not yet," was Eric's reply and we all relaxed marginally.

Bill nodded. "Do you need me?"

"Can you drive?" Eric asked and Bill pointed to my driveway. His car was already there and it was running.

"Good," Eric said and he and Bill headed to the car and in seconds they were flying down my drive.

After they left, we all spent a little while watching the news (I changed back into my nightgown and donned a robe first) There wasn't much in the way of real information yet, just an endless loop of witness accounts and speculation and protesters on both sides making a lot of noise. I never heard anything about Fangtasia being damaged and for that I was grateful. There were, however, a lot of Fellowship people ranting and raving, saying that tonight's attacks 'were only the beginning.'

I watched until I was sick of watching, then said goodnight to Amelia and Tray and retreated to bed. I stripped the sheets and tossed them in a pile, remade the bed and crawled in.

I lay there for a bit, my mind spinning. My blood-bonded lover, the one I had given myself to this very night, was dealing with things right now I could barely imagine. I was worried for him, and worried for myself. There was always something, some new drama or tragedy lurking around the corner it seemed.

I flipped over my pillow after a while and repositioned myself. I tried to think on other things, pleasant things. I tried to remember the feel of Eric's strong arms around me, the warmth and safety he always provides, but I had a terrible noise in my head I couldn't ignore. It grated in my mind, like nails on a chalkboard, full of pain and warning and foreboding. And it was a long, long time before sleep finally took me.

-

_To be continued_

xoxo


	15. Chapter 15

Know Thyself

Chapter Fifteen

I woke up very late but remarkably un-rested. The terrible feeling from last night, as though something horrible was about to descend, was still with me. I showered, dressed and made myself something to eat as if in a fog.

Though it was closer to lunchtime than breakfast, I opted for just a simple bowl of cereal and glass of juice, and I took both into the living room and sat down. I picked up the remote, turned on the TV and, as expected, there was still very little new information about the previous night's attacks. The official number of vampire owned businesses that were hit was nine, but the radical arm of the Fellowship were claiming a number double that. The largest amount of damage seemed to have been centered around New Orleans and I had a few moments of sheer disgust. That city was just starting to be rebuilt, and now more destruction had been intentionally inflicted.

"Anything about Fangtasia?"

I turned when Amelia strode into the room, still in pajamas and looking about about as sleep-deprived as me. I had a sneaking suspicion her lack of shuteye had more to do with her date last night than with worry about the Fellowship terrorist tactics.

"I haven't heard anything," I answered sullenly. I wished I could talk to Eric, but he was safely tucked away for the day now. At least I hoped it was safely. Please, let him be safe, I thought fervently.

"They must be crazy," Amelia said, looking at the television and shaking her head. "To attack at night like that."

"Yeah," I agreed, frowning. "They're getting bolder. Or more stupid." Most of the previous attacks against vampires had taken place during the day when the undead were easy, sleeping targets. From what I was getting from the news reports, most of the damage was caused by quick and crude bombs, which very well could have been placed during the day and detonated later. But some of the businesses were set on fire, too, and whoever was dumb enough to do that at night must have some kind of death wish.

Amelia snorted and got up, heading to the kitchen. I couldn't watch the news any more so I flipped through the channels and finally found a daytime game show. I watched for a few minutes but then decided to give up. There was just no point in trying to distract myself out of my present mood.

Amelia came back into the room and stood in the doorway, holding her own bowl of cereal. She took a few bites, never sitting down, and I knew she wanted to ask me about my time with Eric the night before. I smiled a little. She was proud of herself, for the way she had confronted Eric on my behalf. I had to give her credit; not many people would get in Eric's face and call him a jerk. Girlfriends had to stick together, that was what Amelia was thinking.

"He was very nice," I said, looking up at the witch and catching her in mid-bite. She paused for a second, debating on whether or not to be offended.

I grinned at her. "What did you expect when you moved in with a telepath?"

"Good point," she muttered, and opted for being non-offended. "I know you like him and all, and he is drop dead gorgeous, but he's a little scary, don't you think?"

I shrugged. "I could say the same about Pam."

Amelia sighed, and got a wistful look on her face for a few second. "Yeah," she grinned "I guess so."

We sat in silence for a few minutes before Amelia piped up again.

"Hey, why don't we take a road trip over to Clarice tomorrow night."

"What's in Clarice?" I asked. Besides the former home and lingering, high-dollar perfume stench of one Selah Pumphry, I added snippily to myself.

"New restaurant, Thai cuisine." Amelia looked at me with pleading eyes. "We haven't had a girl's night out in forever."

She was also sick to death of the same old very American food served up in Bon Temps, but she didn't want to offend me by saying it out loud. Amelia was a city girl, yes indeed. I considered that a night out might serve to bolster my spirits. I had done nothing but work and sleep for months, and I had turned down Amelia's offers to go out more times than I wanted to admit. I was feeling like a lousy friend, and decided it was time to change that.

I shrugged. "Sure, sounds good. I have to work 'till seven though, so it will have to be a late dinner."

Amelia instantly brightened. "No problem! You're gonna love Thai food, I just know it!"

I nodded, and was just too mentally exhausted to bother mentioning the fact I'd had Thai several times. I checked the clock and saw it was later than I thought. I had to work the lunch shift today so I decided to go ahead and take off. Maybe working would help me concentrate on something other than my own dismal mood. I grabbed my coat and purse, said good-bye to Amelia and headed for my car.

I drove to Merlotte's on auto-pilot, not thinking, not even bothering to turn on the radio. When I pulled into the parking lot I felt my stomach tighten when I saw Arlene's car. I had completely forgotten I was working with her today. I knew she would have something to say about the Fellowship attacks, and I knew it would be something that would make my blood boil. I really wasn't in the mood to deal with her today and I briefly considered tucking tail and heading back home, but I just couldn't do that to Sam. So I put on my best happy face and marched inside to do my duty.

To my relief, the first several hours of my shift passed slowly, but uneventfully. The Saturday lunch crowd always seemed to be a particularly loud group and today was no exception. A lot of talk centered around the attacks and how terrible it was, while a lot of thoughts centered around the attacks and how great it was that the vamps were getting what they deserved. Since most of the talk and the opposing thoughts were coming from the same people, I had to concentrate really hard to keep my shields up and keep my face from revealing my irritation.

Then, right in the middle of lunch rush, the door opened and every eye in the bar went to the delivery man that walked in carrying a very beautiful - and very large - floral arrangement. The flowers were extraordinary, with roses, carnations, lilies. And dead in the center of the arrangement was a flower I recognized immediately by it's almost obscene shape. I'd seen it once before, and my mouth popped open and my heart rate sped up. The deliver guy whipped out a little clipboard and pen from a side pocket in his pants and I knew what he was going to say before he said it, and I didn't even have to read his thoughts.

"I got a delivery here for Miss. Sookie Stackhouse," the man announced and I cringed and went red. Could he have said that any louder?

In a second, every eye that been on the delivery man and the flowers shifted to me. I couldn't have felt more on display if a spotlight had been pointed at me. I looked around, and I knew my nervous smile was plastered on my face. I walked over to the guy and reached for the clipboard and pen. While I signed for my flowers I could hear the guys thoughts as he gave me the once-over. And he hadn't started with my face.

I all but shoved the clipboard back at him, muttered something decidedly not polite under my breath and turned to examine the flowers. Both Sam and Arlene had moved in to get a closer look. Sam, particularly, looked very interested in a sort of jealous-worried-boss-friend-and-sometimes-more-than-a-friend kind of way.

"There's a card," Sam stated in a neutral tone. I had already noticed that, of course, but I was intending to wait until my audience had dispersed somewhat before I opened it. But my co-workers (and over half the customers in the bar) were still watching me carefully and showing absolutely no signs of going back to their own business anytime soon. I was as on- the-spot as a gal could get, and a little tickle in my brain was telling me that was exactly what a certain Viking had intended with this dramatic middle of the day delivery. I vowed to kill Eric next time I saw him. Right after I jumped him.

The flower arrangement was so large, and sitting on the bar as it was, I had to reach up to grab the card out of the little plastic forked holder. I glanced around - yep, still being watched - and flipped open the envelope and pulled out the card. It read simply 'My Sookie' and was signed with a giant 'E'.

I couldn't help but smile. Eric was dealing with heaven knows what in Shreveport last night but - once again - he had managed to arrange a special delivery for me. I knew one of his daytime people had probably done most of the work, but Eric had written the card himself. And _no one _else would have possibly known to choose that particular flower as the centerpiece. My smile grew bigger and for the first time since I woke up I felt some happiness. It was short-lived.

"_My Sookie_?" Arlene said too loudly, reading over my shoulder. I favored her with my best icy stare and quickly placed the card back in the envelope. "Who's E?" she asked in an overly friendly voice. She smiled at me, but it didn't touch her eyes. I was about to lose my temper, I could feel it building. I was just about to say something really and truly nasty when Sam saved me.

"Come on, cher, let's get these moved off the bar. You can put 'em back in the office."

I looked at my boss, grateful, but he wasn't smiling. At all. I carefully picked up the flowers (they were heavier than they looked) and brought them around the bar and down the hall to the office. Sam followed me, and while I was situating the arrangement on the floor by the desk I heard the door shut.

"Are those from Eric?" he demanded.

I turned to him, and felt my temper flare.

"Yes, they are, actually. Is there a problem with that?"

Sam just looked at me. Arlene didn't know the implications of the words on the card, but Sam clearly did.

"You and Eric." Sam's face was expressionless, and I wasn't in his head, but I had known him long enough to read his body language, and he wasn't happy. If I had to pick an emotion, it would probably be concern. Sam was no big fan of the Viking.

"You know I'm tied to him," I said, trying to keep my voice from rising. "You called him personally and asked him to come here when you knew I was upset."

Sam shut his eyes, bowed his head, took a breath. "Right, I remember. I also remember you telling me you didn't belong to him."

"Things have changed since then," I replied, and even to my ears it sounded weak. I had no idea how to even begin to explain to Sam what Eric and I had been through over the past week.

"He's too deep in their politics," Sam stated. "You'll become a target."

I already am, I thought to myself, and felt a shiver go up my spine. I needed to get away before I said something I shouldn't.

"Sam, look. I appreciate your concern, but this is my business. Eric and I, we're going to see where this goes. If it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out." I shrugged, and I hoped Sam would believe my bull - or at least pretend to. "I got to get back to my tables," I added, and I knew that would probably motivate him to drop this conversation, or at least put it on hold. Sam took the bar very seriously.

He shook his head, but stepped aside and let me pass by him. I headed back out spent the rest of my shift studiously minding my work, ignoring Arlene and avoiding my boss's pointed stares that shifted between affection, concern and disbelief. It was a long afternoon.

Finally, none too soon, night fell and the dinner staff arrived to take over. I took a few minutes before I left to add up my tips, then retrieved Eric's gift from Sam's office and tried to slip out the door unnoticed - very hard to do when you're carrying an enormous arrangement of flowers. Of course, the night shift gals had to stop me to ooh and aah over the bouquet, and ask me about my new man. I remained elusive on the subject and finally managed to sneak out the door. I walked to my car was digging in my purse awkwardly for my keys when I heard a familiar voice.

"Good evening, Miss Stackhouse."

I turned, and my eyes went wide with surprise as I recognized the face in front of me.

"Rasul!" I said, smiling hugely. He inclined his neck toward me, and he smiled, thought just slightly.

"May I help you with those?" he asked formally, reaching out to take the flowers from me. I blinked at him, confused at both his presence here and in his behavior, both which was very unusual. Rasul and I had spoken several times before, back when he worked for Sophie Ann. He had been very personable, a flirt even, and made a point of turning on the charm whenever I was around. I liked him, and I had been very happy when I heard he survived both the bombing in Rhodes and the Nevada coup.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him as I pulled out my car keys and opened the door.

"Bill Compton was summoned to New Orleans last night," he said "And I was asked to take his place here, to serve as your bodyguard this evening."

I sighed. "You mean my baby-sitter?" I smiled apologetically, but Rasul didn't so much as grin. Okie dokie. I tried a different approach. "Why did Bill have to go to New Orleans?"

"The King requires his assistance in some matters of importance."

Well, that could mean a lot of things. I wanted to get some more information but the way Rasul said it made it clear the subject was closed. I nodded and reached for the flowers.

"I'll take those now, thanks."

I fumbled around for several minutes trying to get the flowers into the back seat of the car without damaging them and then trying to find a way to prop them so they wouldn't fall over during the drive home. My vampire guardian waited patiently. He opened the driver's door for me while I got in, told me he would follow me home, and then shut the door for me too. I honestly had no idea what to make of the situation with him. It was like he was a whole different person and I wondered if he had been treated badly by the new regime.

Rasul trailed me home, opened my car door for me when we arrived, and even walked the flowers to my door for me. Amelia was watching television, and she smiled hugely when she saw my guest. I wasn't sure what impressed her more - the handsome dark vampire or the enormous bouquet of flowers he was holding.

"Amelia, this here is Rasul," I said, taking the flowers from him and placing them on the table. I shrugged off my coat as the witch and the vampire exchanged brief hellos. I noticed Rasul was still standing on the porch and I could have smacked myself for forgetting my manners.

"I'm sorry, Rasul," I said, embarrassed, "Would you like to come in? I can get you a True Blood if you like." I stepped back so he had room to pass, but he didn't move.

"No thank you, Miss Stackhouse," he said, taking a step backward. He inclined his head again. "I'll be in my car if my assistance is required." He turned to my roommate and smiled, a genuine smile like I remembered him having before. "It was a pleasure to meet you, Amelia." I noted how he called her by her first name and I felt a moment of irritation.

"You, too," Amelia said, beaming. She might really like Tray, but she wasn't above a bit of flirting, that was sure.

Rasul turned around and he had whipped out a cell phone and was punching in a number before he even made it back to the car. I slammed the door. Amelia glared at me.

"Bad night?" she asked, her eyebrows raising.

"You have no idea," I muttered, sitting down heavily on the couch. Amelia went over and touched the flowers, bent to sniff them. She was openly impressed.

"Nice flowers," she said with a smile.

"Yep."

"Eric?"

"Yep."

"Did that Rasul bring them?" she asked curiously,

"Nope. Delivered to Merlotte's right during the lunch rush." Amelia burst out in laughter.

"Marking his territory?" she asked and after a moment I nodded.

"I'm sure that's the plan. Eric is really...."

"Possessive?" she finished, smiling. I sighed, nodded. "Well, what do you expect, hooking up with a vampire?" She just loved getting to say that, I could tell.

My nearly sleepless night was finally catching up with me, and I was suddenly tired to the bone. I told Amelia I was going to bed early, and she said something about maybe doing the same. I got up to leave and had a sudden thought.

"Where's Octavia?"

"She left earlier. You remember her saying her sister was really sick? Turns out she has pneumonia and she had to go to the hospital. Octavia drove down to help with the kids."

"Oh, wow," I breathed, feeling a little guilty. I was so wrapped up in my own drama I had almost forgotten everyone else had their own problems. I would say an extra prayer for Octavia and her family tonight, I promised myself.

I got cleaned up and dressed for bed in something of a funk. I kept my phone close by, hoping Eric would call soon. I was going insane not knowing what was happening. Seeing Rasul had made me feel a little bit better, since I figured he'd surely have said something if Eric or Pam had been hurt. I considered grabbing something to eat, but I wasn't the least big hungry even though the only thing I'd had all day was a bowl of cereal. Worry was apparently one of the best diet plans around.

Just as I was climbing into bed to read for a while my cell phone rang. I checked the number and breathed a sigh of relief. I dropped the phone once; I was in such a hurry to answer.

"Hello? Eric?" I wasn't even going to try to sound like I hadn't been stressed.

"You sound distraught, my lover."

I smiled into the phone when I heard his voice. Something in me relaxed, and I felt a rush of warmth.

"Are you okay?" I asked quickly.

There was a short pause before he answered. "Yes, I'm well. Rasul is with you?"

"He's in his car out front."

"Good."

"What's going on? Why is Bill in New Orleans?" Again, a short silence on the other end of the line.

"There are things I can't tell you."

I held the phone away for a moment, feeling hurt. I knew Eric played things pretty close to the vest, but he and I were supposed to be together now, right? He should be able to talk to me, shouldn't he? Isn't that what being in a relationship meant? I terrible feeling welled up inside me and I couldn't even speak. The silence became pronounced.

"I've upset you," Eric said finally. Wow, you think?

"I don't understand why you can't tell me what's going on. I've been watching the news, I already know some about what happened."

"You know what the media has told you," he said, and I could tell by the way he said the words, slowly and deliberately, that he was trying to tell me something without saying anything. I paused. Was he not alone, maybe? Or, another thought, maybe he thought his phone wasn't secure? I shut my eyes, feeling ridiculous. A bugged phone line in a vampire bar? Maybe I'd watched too many movies. Or not. I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt.

"Thanks for the flowers," I said, abruptly changing both the subject and the tone of my voice.

"Did you like them?" he asked, and I noticed his own voice lightened a bit.

"They're beautiful. They made, uh, quite a statement when they arrived."

I heard him chuckle quietly. I could picture his face, see the little curves that formed by his mouth when he smiled.

"Amelia said you were marking your territory," I continued, putting a little steel in my voice.

"The witch is not entirely unperceptive," he said, sounding not the least bit apologetic.

"Uh huh. And what did you tell Rasul? And don't tell me you didn't say anything to him. He's acting really strange."

"By acting strange, do you mean he is no longer trying to seduce you?"

"Oh, _come on_, Eric. Rasul never tried to seduce me and you know it." I felt my cave woman rear up in irritation. Bill had taught me pretty well about vampires and jealousy, but I wasn't about to let Eric think he could bully and intimidate my friends. Not that I counted Rasul as a friend, but I did like him and I didn't want him acting differently toward me just because I had a romantic involvement with Mr. Sheriff.

"He barely even spoke to me tonight," I added with a touch of accusation.

"Excellent. He's there to make sure you arrived safely home, not to chat," he replied, and he sounded both matter-of-fact and pleased when he said it.

I sighed. I was nowhere near being done with this particular conversation, but I decided to drop it for the time being. Some things are better dealt with in person, and besides that, I knew Eric would probably have to go deal with bar stuff soon. I didn't want to spend what little time we had arguing.

"I'm going to Clarice with Amelia tomorrow night, to a new restaurant," I offered, thinking that would prompt him into some sort of conversation. It worked, but not how I hoped.

"No."

"Excuse me?" I asked, not quite believing what I'd just heard.

"No, you won't be going to dinner with the witch tomorrow night," he said and he sounded pretty darn sure. Was he_ really_ trying to tell me what I could and couldn't do?

"Any particular reason why not," I asked through clenched teeth.

"Several," he said simply.

And that pushed me right over the edge. I had made a pretty darn big concession last night, but I was getting really, really close to regretting it. As much as I cared for Eric, as much as I wanted to be with him, I was not going to be ordered around. Compromise was a two-way street, and he needed to figure that out. All the stress from the day, the pent up emotions, just bubbled up out of control.

"Eric, this has got to stop," I said, and my voice was heated. "I could barely sleep last night I was so worried about you, you know that? But now you won't tell me a thing about what's going on. You won't tell me why Bill is gone. Rasul is acting like he can barely tolerate me, and now you're telling me I can't go out to dinner with my friend! Does this seem, I don't know, just a little over the top, even for you? A little controlling?"

Silence.

"Eric?"

"I'm here," he said after a moment. "I need you to trust me on this."

I huffed out a breath. "You have to tell me why. I'm not going to stay locked up in my house every night without a good reason. And I'm not real thrilled with having vampires sitting outside my house every night either. Amelia has the place warded, and I've rescinded all the invitations I needed to. It's getting out of hand!"

"Sookie," Eric began, and I could feel the strain in his voice, like he was trying not to sound angry. "I have to go. I'll talk to you again."

I heard a click and then nothing.

I sat on the bed and just stared for a long while, not quite believing what just happened. Did he really just hang up on me? This wasn't like Eric - or rather, this wasn't like the Eric I expected. I laid back on the bed and stared at the ceiling, feeling tears start to well in my eyes. I was emotionally exhausted, sleep deprived and utterly hurt and infuriated. I wanted to call Eric back, but I wasn't the one that one that had ended the conversation! And if he really thought I was going to break plans with Amelia he was crazy. I wasn't in his retinue, and he couldn't pull rank on me. I flipped off the light beside my bed, rolled over and closed my eyes. I said my prayers, then I cried tears of hurt and anger until I finally fell asleep, utterly spent.

I didn't know how long I slept, but I knew it wasn't nearly long enough. I was woken by a strange sensation pulling at me, whispering to me, willing me to get up. I opened my eyes, disoriented at first, then the strange feeling came stronger and when I recognized it my eyes flew open and I was instantly wide awake. Eric was calling to me. Warmth rushed into me at the realization, and a feeling of safety.

I sat up in bed and tried not to move. I turned my thoughts inward and tried to follow the call. I let my body move without conscious effort, and I found myself standing up and walking down the hall, past the darkened living room, through the kitchen and to the rarely used front door. I hesitated a moment, then opened it. Eric looked down at me and I stepped back so he could enter, shutting the door behind him quietly.

We looked at one another for a few moments, then Eric reached out and pulled me into his arms. I held him tightly, placing my cheek on his chest.

"You called to me," I said softly.

Eric didn't release his hold on me. "Yes, and you allowed yourself to hear me and answer."

I pushed away from him, raised my face. "Yeah, well, my shields are a mess. I've been in emotional overload."

He stroked my cheek with his thumb. "I was too abrupt on the phone."

I snickered quietly. Was that an apology?

"Why didn't you just knock on the back door, as usual?" I asked, suddenly curious.

"I didn't want to alert others of my presence. Rasul is still out back and your roommates are asleep."

I nodded. "One roommate actually, but yes."

"And I wanted to test our connection," he continued, sounding pleased. "You answered faster than I would have imagined."

Well, isn't that just great? I wasn't sure how I felt about that yet.

"Are you going to tell me what's going on now?" I asked with some trepidation. I was still very tired and didn't want to argue, but I thought I deserved some explanation.

Eric looked in my eyes a long moment. "The Sheriff of area two was killed last night," he said finally. "She along with her human lover who also worked as her accountant. Two others Sheriffs were injured, one badly. What the media won't tell you, because they don't know, is that the attacks were all focused on businesses owned by vampires in power positions."

I sucked in a sharp breath and closed my eyes tightly. I didn't know any of the new vamps from Nevada that had taken over areas in Louisiana, except Victor. And I wished like hell I didn't know him. But if the Fellowship had specifically been targeting vampires in the power structure...

"Do you think they'll come after you?" I asked, and I held my breath.

"They already tried," Eric answered, and his voice was hot. "We found a bomb in a car parked in the back lot of Fangtasia. It was poorly constructed, but powerful. It was only by chance it didn't detonate. We were very lucky. The bomb squad told us if it had been properly made it could have destroyed the building."

"Oh, no." I felt a tear slide down my cheek. Eric had been with me last night, so he wouldn't have been killed if the explosion had happened. But Pam was at the club, and others I knew. I felt sick, truly sick to my core. Eric touched the tear with his fingertip, then put it to his mouth.

"What about Victor?" I asked after I had processed the new information. I wondered if maybe the Fellowship had inadvertently done me a favor during their rampage. Hey, I could hope, right? Eric actually laughed out loud, very quietly.

"He's uninjured. New Orleans was hardest hit in numbers of attacks, but it was spread out among several businesses. No one was killed in his area, and damage to individual buildings and personnel was relatively minor compared to what happened in the other areas."

I sighed. Figures.

"So why all the secrecy?" I asked. "Why didn't you want to just tell me all this on the phone in the first place?"

"I shouldn't have told you at all," Eric said bluntly. "And I shouldn't have left Fangtasia, but you made it necessary. You're too stubborn for your own good. I have good reason to ask you not to travel right now, but you refuse to yield to my judgment. I came here tonight so you could look in my eyes, and perhaps feel my sincerity through our tie. I won't have you getting angry with me and intentionally putting yourself in harms way just to prove your independence."

I looked down, embarrassed. That _was_ pretty much on-target with what I had planned to do. It was a little uncomfortable having someone around that seemed to know me so well.

I did look in his eyes then, and I did feel some emotions coming from him. He was worried, just as I was. He was feeling protective, too. I picked up a hint of desire, and one emotion that was even stronger, running underneath all of the others. I was blown away as I recognized it, and even more astonished when I recognized the same emotion fluttering in my own heart. Eric and I had apparently crossed the line, the rather significant line, between something close to love and the genuine article. Uh oh. When had _tha_t happened? I trembled a little, and Eric reached out to me, running his strong hands along my arms.

"Bill was summoned to New Orleans to help find the ones responsible for the attacks. They left a trace of their scent, and Bill will be able to help track them. The King is livid. The new regime has barely taken control and already he is going to take a hit on income because of this. He is demanding every available vampire in the state assist in the apprehensions."

"Apprehensions?" I asked doubtfully. "You mean killings, right?"

Eric looked at me and smiled. "You don't need to concern yourself with mundane details, my Sookie."

I started to protest but Eric cut me off.

"Don't leave Bon Temps right now. I'm not telling you, but I _am_ asking this of you, as your lover and as the one that shares your blood-bond." He bent down and kissed me gently. "I finally have you as my own, I don't want you taken from me."

"Amelia won't be happy," I said, but it was clear by my voice I was going to do as he asked.

"The witch will survive," he said and he bent down, nuzzling his face in my hair. "Rasul is only here for part of the night, then he has to leave to join Bill and the others. I was allowed to keep a minimal staff to run Fangtasia. I'll send Pam tomorrow night."

"Do you really think all this is necessary? I mean, with everything else going on I'll bet I'm pretty far down on Victor's to-do list." I cringed as soon as I said the words. I really could have phrased that better.

Eric's brows furrowed. "I don't know," he stated, not sounding at all happy. "Something is gnawing at me, but I can't put my finger on it. I'm not comfortable at all and I think it's best not to take chances. I haven't survived as long as I have by being complacent."

I nodded, resigned. "At least Pam will act normal around me," I muttered, still feeling unaccountably irritated at Rasul's standoffish behavior. "What did you say to Rasul, anyway?" I asked, frowning.

Eric laughed. "Let's just say I made it clear that you belonged to me now. Tradition dictates certain behaviors be...adjusted or ceased, out of respect for me and mine. And you _are_ mine, lover." He relished getting to say that, I could tell.

"Okay, whatever," I dismissed it with a wave of my hand. "Can you stay for a while?" I asked, and moved in close to him, wrapping my arms around his waist and peered up at him with what I hoped was a seductive look. He smelled great, and looked even better, as always. And Eric's blood was still running through me, inspiring my libido.

"Nothing would make me happier," he said, looking down at me with longing. "But I must return immediately. It was a risk to leave at all. The King ordered all surviving Sheriffs to remain at their homes or base of operations in case of more violence."

I hugged him to me, and he raised my chin to kiss me with passion, and my temperature zoomed. Then he held me away, and I saw his fangs had descended some. Maybe it was the emotional day I'd had, or the way he'd risked disobeying a King just to come see me, or maybe because I was just completely turned on by the big Viking, but I wanted him right then, as much as I'd ever had.

"We could make it really quick," I suggested, biting my lower lip and grinning. A sound rumbled in Eric's chest and he picked me up. I wrapped my legs around his waist, and the way he was holding me we were face to face. He kissed me again on the lips, then on my neck, then he looked back in my eyes.

"You're quite the succubus, you know that?" he said and he grinned hugely.

"Not a very good one, if I can't even seduce you," I pouted.

Eric laughed against my mouth as he kissed me once more, then he lowered me back to the floor.

"Another time. As I told you last night, you are much more than a means to gratification. You're my lover, my Sookie, and I'll wait until I have the time to properly devote to you, as you deserve."

"I hope that's soon," I purred, and I meant it. I felt like I was going to spontaneously combust.

"As do I," Eric said, his eyes filling with warmth. He opened the door and turned to leave, then hesitated. He turned back to me, and it seemed like he wanted to say something. I held my breath, wondering if was going to acknowledge the feelings I had picked up from him earlier, say the words neither of us had yet dared to say.

It took almost a full minute before I realized he was waiting, too. On me. I considered, then held my silence.

"You truly are a stubborn woman," Eric said, his eyes gleaming with humor. Then he smiled at me, moved out the door at vampire speed and was gone, disappearing into the darkness.

_To be continued_

_*Huge thanks to S. Meadows, my most brilliant Beta, who bravely trudged through this long and winding mess of a chapter! You're the best Meads!_


	16. Chapter 16

Know Thyself

Chapter Sixteen

"Sookie, wake up!"

I opened my eyes to find Amelia standing over my bed, shaking me. There was a bright stream of sunlight coming in through the window so I knew it was at least mid-morning. A glance at the clock as I sat up confirmed it.

"What's up?" I asked groggily, blinking my eyes a few times.

"You have to come see this," Amelia said, and she sounded a bit frantic. "Come on."

"Okay, okay," I said and I kicked off the covers and pulled myself out of bed. I couldn't imagine what had my witchy roommate in such a state this early in the day.

I followed Amelia as she headed upstairs to her living area at a run. I followed considerably slower, holding the handrail as I trudged up each stair, still feeling half-asleep. I wondered when I was ever going to get a full night of uninterrupted sleep. Amelia was already perched on her chair in front of the little desk in her bedroom, staring at her computer, when I finally caught up with her.

"Look at this," she said urgently, nodding at the webpage on the screen. I came closer and squinted, leaning over her shoulder.

The page was dramatic, with a black background and white printing. At the top I recognized the Fellowship of the Sun Logo. Under the logo was a smaller line saying 'Taking back Louisiana' and a few sentences I had heard a hundred times before: the 'mission statement' of the group. More like a 'pathetic attempt to justify stupidity' statement.

"Where did you find this?" I asked, and Amelia peered up at me. She reached beside the monitor and handed me a plain white envelope, opened, with a single page enclosed.

"That was on the door this morning. It didn't have a name on it so I opened it."

I pulled out the letter and saw it was typed in large letters. There was a web address listed - I assumed to the page we were now looking at on the screen - and it was signed simply 'A Friend'.

"Alright," I said, frowning. "What's the big deal? There are a bunch of these sites." It was true. I wasn't a big internet surfer, but I was savvy enough to know every crazy group under the sun had a website now, including the radical arm of the Fellowship. There were even online fan clubs for vampires, including one that worked at Fangtasia. She was as scary as a vampire could get, but she had a cult-like following of fangbangers that absolutely worshiped her.

Amelia shook her head. "No, this one is different. Way different." She slid out of the chair. "Sit down," she instructed and I did. "This part required a password but I was able to get around it."

I wondered if there was a special spell for hacking computers, but I didn't ask.

Amelia reached over and took the mouse and clicked on a link labeled 'Louisiana's Most Wanted.' When the page loaded, she started scrolling down slowly and I couldn't believe what I saw. There were pictures of both vampires and humans, some of whom I recognized, most I didn't. Some of the vamp pictures were in black and white, some were looking straight at the camera like they were posing, but most were 'action shots', clearly taken unbeknownst to the subject. Under each photo was a name, and most of them had home and business addresses listed, and then there was the 'crime' each had committed to be included on the page. Under the vampire photos, it just said 'Vampire' (apparently being undead was crime enough to the Fellowship) but under the human's photos it had various things listed - slave, minion and even more nasty designations.

I started to get a really sick feeling as I continued to scroll down. The page seemed to go on and on and I then, about halfway down I saw two pictures side by side that caught my attention. One was a female vampire and the other was a human male, and each had a large red X over the photo.

"Does that mean what I think it means?" I asked, not taking my eyes off the screen. An uneasy suspicion began to build inside me.

"Yeah,"Amelia answered, confirming my fears. "It's a hit list, I think. From what I can tell, the pictures with the red X's are vamps and people that have been killed." She scrolled down a little more and there were a couple pictures with yellow X's. "Yellow means they were hurt, I think."

"Oh my God," I breathed, remembering what Eric had told me last night. I didn't know for sure, but I had a good idea the crossed out pictures on the screen were the Sheriff and her consort that had been killed in the attacks, and the other two vamps that had been hurt.

"Is this legal?" I asked, feeling outraged. "How can people put stuff like this online?"

"That's not the real problem we have," Amelia said and clicked at the bottom of the screen where it said 'go to next page' and I sucked in a sharp breath when the page loaded and I saw my own photo staring back at me. It was a picture of me taken in Merlotte's and it must have been recent because I was wearing my winter work uniform. I was carrying a tray and it was obvious the picture was taken without my knowledge, probably by a camera phone judging from the questionable quality. Under the photo was my name, my home address, my place of employment and my 'crime'. I felt tears flow from my eyes as the read the single word: _whore_. Also on the same page was a photo of Eric, taken at a distance as he was getting into his car; and a photo of Eric's trusted daytime guy Bobby Burnham (he was listed as 'lapdog') taken as he was walking into Fangtasia one day.

I pushed the chair back and stood up, wrapping my arms around myself. I felt like I was going to be sick, and I probably would have thrown up if I had had anything in my stomach. Amelia came up behind me and when I turned around she hugged me.

"How can anyone do that?" I asked, my voice shaking with rage and fear. "How can anyone be so nasty?"

"I don't know. There are a bunch of websites like this, not just targeting vampires. Some have photos of undercover cops, some target religious groups. It's crazy, but the good news is that most of these sites end up being taken down when people start complaining."

"They have my address!" I raised my voice and pointed at the computer. "They know where I work!" I thought about Sam. I would have to tell him, and he was not going to be at all happy. I wondered if Eric knew about this, and I suspected he didn't. I couldn't imagine him - or any vampire - allowing something like this.

I sat back down at the desk and continued to look through the pictures. I found Victor's, but Bill wasn't listed, neither was Pam. I clicked back to the main page and at the very top there was a little counter. Apparently this was a pretty popular place, and I felt another wave of nausea hit me when I realized thousands of crazy fanatics may have seen my photo.

"Don't worry, Sookie," Amelia said. "I'm going to call my dad and see if he knows anyone that could help."

I looked up at her, confused. "Your dad?"

Amelia shrugged. "He knows a lot of people. And he has a really good attorney. Maybe he can give us some ideas on how to get the website taken down."

"Or I can just tell Eric," I muttered. "He could probably take down more than just the damn website, too."

Amelia laughed but I cringed. Did I really just say that, and did I really just mean it? I had to admit I did. I was as outraged as I had ever been, and I felt horribly, horribly violated.

"I'm going to take a shower" I said and strode out of the room and stomped down the stairs, wiping my eyes. I was sick of crying, and being hunted like a dog. I was sick of all the hate and the anger and the constant feeling that something really bad was going to happen any minute. I just wanted to be left alone, to live my life in peace.

As I stepped into the shower and felt the warm water run over me I suddenly remembered it was Sunday and I had missed church. I shut my eyes and made my silent apologies to God, and said a few prayers, including one for Octavia and her family, one for my little cousin and one for myself. It couldn't hurt and right now I felt like I needed all the help I could get. I thought about Eric, and wished I could call him. I needed to tell him what Amelia had found; both to warn him and because I hoped he and the other Louisiana vamps could get that damn website taken down.

I got done cleaning myself up, got dressed for work in my usual outfit, including the silver bracelets and chain Eric had sent me that had become part of my standard uniform. I also spent a little time doing chores I had neglected the past few days. I was running on energy from pure rage.

Finally I sat down to have a bite to eat, still more than a little shaky, and Amelia joined me.

"We still on for dinner tonight?' she asked.

_Crap!_ I had forgotten about that. This might not go over well.

"Eric asked me not to leave Bon Temps," I said hesitantly, keeping my eyes on my food. I could hear my roommate's thoughts, and she wasn't happy. She was going to say something about Eric and vampires and their controlling ways, but then she thought I was already having a bad enough day and she didn't want to upset me further. That was nice of her, and I thanked her silently.

"Pam might be coming over tonight," I offered, and as expected Amelia brightened.

"That's cool. Why does Eric keep sending vamps over here anyway? You think he knows about that website?"

I shook my head. "I don't know. He might." I wasn't going to tell Amelia about Victor, because then I'd have to tell her why he was potentially after me. If she thought it had something to do with the Fellowship, I could live with that.

"So is this going to be weird for you, having Pam around?" I asked, hoping to detour the conversation. Amelia laughed.

"No. Pam and I weren't going anywhere and we both knew it. It'll be fine. You want me to rent a few movies or something tonight? We're almost out of True Blood, too. I can pick some up."

I smiled at my roommate. "Thanks, that would be great." I glanced at the clock and stood up, took my dishes to the sink and washed them before heading out for my Sunday shift.

The bar was pretty busy, and I didn't get a chance to talk to Sam about the Fellowship website until closing time. I was nervous, and I twirled the silver bracelet on my wrist around and around as I talked. Sam just listened quietly when I told him about the picture of me that was taken while I was at work, and about how Merlotte's was listed as my place of employment. To my great relief, he didn't mention a thing about our conversation the day before, or about Eric. Sam could have used this as a perfect excuse to say 'I told you so' but God bless him, he didn't. He just hugged me, said a few choice words about the Fellowship and told me he had my back and would be damned if he let anything happen to me while I was on his watch. I thanked him, grateful for his understanding. Sam was a one in a million friend and I told him so.

As promised, Pam was waiting for me when I left work. She was sitting on the trunk of my car with her legs crossed, looking every inch like a suburban soccer mom. She hopped up gracefully at my approach, and smiled at me.

"Hi," I said, forcing myself to smile and hoping it looked genuine. "You sure you want to do this?"

Pam raised her chin a fraction. "Eric tells me to guard the telepath, I guard the telepath." She looked at my car and her nose wrinkled. "You should get a new vehicle."

"Yeah, well, that's first on my list right after I win the lottery," I muttered, annoyed. It was the nicest car I'd ever had and I didn't have a problem with it at all. I looked around the lot. "Speaking of cars, where's yours?"

Pam walked around the the passenger side and opened the door. "I left it at your house." She slid in at the same time I did. I buckled up and started the car.

"So are you going to come inside, or are you going to hang out in my driveway all night like the guys?" I tried to sound light, but some irritation crept into my voice. I was still unhappy about Eric's intimidation tactics with Rasul.

"I'll come in. I already saw your lovely roommate and she tells me we're going to watch movies." She had a distinct leer in her voice and I looked at her sideways.

"You know she's dating someone now, right?"

"Of course."

We drove in silence for a few minutes, and I wondered how much Pam knew about what happened between me and Eric, and I was curious if she knew about the Fellowship website we'd found. I considered, decided to cut to the chase.

"So I guess Eric told you?"

Pam looked straight ahead, expressionless. "About the change in your relationship? Yes. I hope you're both done playing games. It's very dangerous for us when Eric is distracted. I hope he'll be more focused now that the situation has been resolved."

"I'm not sure anything is really resolved," I said, thinking about Victor. I had no idea how much Eric had told her about that situation and I was hesitant to mention anything.

"Why not?" Pam asked, with a flash of demand in her voice. "Do you not belong to Eric now?"

"I guess so," I said with some irritation. I was still really uncomfortable with that term, though I was pretty sure Pam thought it was a compliment Eric would want me in that way. "There's other stuff going on, though." I left it at that, figuring if Eric told Pam what was going on, she'd understand. And if she didn't, she wouldn't ask.

"Yes, so I gather by my having to be here," she replied neutrally.

I was driving, so I was looking ahead, but I could feel her eyes on me. I turned to glance at her. "I guess you're not so thrilled with having to be here tonight," I ventured. Pam didn't respond for a moment.

"I hope whatever is going on with you won't put Eric in danger."

"I hope so, too," I said quietly. It felt a little strange, sitting there in the car with Pam who had been Eric's sexual partner for who knows how many years. I wasn't jealous exactly, and I knew their relationship was very different now, but there was still a peculiar undercurrent running between us at the moment. I could almost feel it, it was so tangible. It was as if she was protective of Eric, like she wasn't sure I was good enough for him. It reminded me of how a big sister might look at her brother's girlfriend, which struck me as pretty funny considering Pam was younger than Eric by an enormous margin.

"You're worried about him being with me?" I asked, and Pam shrugged.

"Of course I am," she answered. "He's never had feelings toward a human, not as long as I've known him. In fact, he's always frowned on vampires that did harbor sentiments for a particular human. I've enjoyed teasing him immensely, but I can't help but be concerned now that he has finally claimed you. Eric is in a position of great power and responsibility and he has enemies. You are a vulnerability for him." Pam didn't sound like she was being accusing, she was just simply stating a fact. A fact I already knew, since Eric had been very clear on the point.

We were pulling into the driveway, and I parked next to Pam's classy but conservative car. We walked inside, and Amelia was waiting for us.

"Did you tell her about the website?" my roommate asked me without preamble. I favored the witch with a hard look. We hadn't even got our coats off yet and she was already bringing up what could be a very touchy subject.

"I was just about to," I answered.

"What website?" Pam asked, looking between me and Amelia.

"I was going to tell you earlier," Amelia explained "But you were in a hurry to get to Merlotte's to meet Sookie, so I didn't say anything. It's a Fellowship website. I had to hack into it," she continued, pride in her voice now. "It has Sookie's picture and address, and Eric's too and a bunch of other Louisiana vamps."

Pam was showing fang, and she stepped very close to Amelia. "Show me," she demanded and she followed Amelia up the stairs. I went ahead and hung up my coat, then trailed up after them.

Pam's eyes took in the pictures and the information on the screen quickly, and within minutes she whipped out her cell phone to call Eric. Pam explained the situation to him, and I heard Eric's voice very faintly through the phone as he spoke to her, and even that small bit of almost-contact with him made me flush with warmth. After a few minutes, Pam handed the phone to me.

"Eric wants to talk to you."

I took the phone, held it to my ear. Eric's vampire hearing knew I was listening and he spoke before I even said hello.

"Pam is going to stay with you until further notice," he said, his voice deeper than normal, which I noticed happened when he was under stress.

"During the day, too?" I asked, surprised.

"Yes," he replied instantly and I winced, irritated on several levels. First, that it looked like I wasn't going to get a say in the matter, and second because I doubted very much Pam would appreciate having to spend her days in the little hole under the floor in my closet. She struck me as a type that slept either in a big, comfortable bed or at least an upscale coffin (probably with pink silk lining).

I saw Pam was back to perusing the website with Amelia, so I stepped out into the hall.

"Does Pam know about Victor?" I whispered as quietly as I could. I knew Eric would be able to hear me.

"No," he said, and he was being very quiet, too. "I only told her I had reason to be concerned for your safety."

"Okay. What are you going to do about the Fellowship?"

There was a pause. "We're very close to tracking down the ones responsible for the attacks in New Orleans. With luck, they are the same ones that were stupid enough to create that website the witch discovered. Either way, once we make our first apprehension I'm sure we'll get the information we need."

I shuddered. I didn't want to think about that too closely. I had no doubt vampires had very effective methods of getting people to talk, even sing if necessary.

"Sookie," Eric said, his voice sounding very personal. "I wish I could come to you myself, but that's impossible right now. Please take care of yourself, and trust in Pam."

"I will," I said, putting as much of myself into the words as I could. "You be careful, too. Okay?"

"Always. I need to speak to Pam again. I'll talk to you soon, dear one."

"Bye, Eric" I whispered, walking back into the bedroom and holding the phone out to Pam. When I glanced at the computer screen I saw she and Amelia were reading a Frequently Asked Questions page. You've got to be kidding, I thought to myself, and shook my head. Pam took the phone and she and Eric finished up their conversation while I wandered back downstairs in a sort of daze. Amelia followed me.

"Pam's staying here for a while," I told her. "She'll probably need to borrow some clothes. Mine will be too big for her, I think."

Amelia nodded. "No problem. She and I have the same taste and we're about the same size. I don't mind sharing."

Pam joined us a few minutes later and she was wearing one of those vampire fixed stares.

"How did you find that website?" she asked and Amelia ran back upstairs to get the letter. Pam took it from her, looked at it for a few seconds then held it up to her face and inhaled. She winced.

"Smells like Were," she said, walking over to lay the letter on the kitchen table.

"Sookie is a friend of the pack," Amelia said. "Maybe that's what the signature meant."

Pam and I exchanged glances. It was a possibility, especially when I recalled the word _friend_ had been capitalized. I was a little embarrassed I hadn't considered the possibility earlier but I couldn't begin to imagine who might have delivered the warning.

"I understand you have a safe place for me to stay during the day?" Pam asked after a couple minutes. I nodded and stood up, motioned to Pam to follow me and I started down the hall.

"I'll show you. It's kind of small. Bill built it a while back."

Pam shrugged and followed me. "It worked for Eric, I'm sure it will be fine."

I took her to the bedroom and showed her the light-tight space in the floor of the closet. Pam looked around the room and inspected the space without comment. I wasn't particularly thrilled with having a vampire guest stay in my house again, and it was a little annoying that Eric hadn't even asked me my opinion on the subject.

"You really don't have to stay here, Pam," I said. "That website may have been up for a year for all I know. No reason to panic now, right?"

"Eric wants me to stay, I stay," she said, looking at me like I had grown a second head. I sighed loudly.

"Does that ever get old?" I asked, crossing my arms across my chest. Pam just continued to look at me, not speaking. I knew Pam liked me okay, but it will still not a healthy thing to provoke her, so I must have had a moment of temporary insanity because I kept going.

"I know you said you enjoyed working for Eric, but seriously, doesn't it bother you at all that you have to do what he tells you all the time? I know you don't want to have to stay here and sleep in my closet." I barked a laugh. "Who would? Don't you hate not having a choice?"

I realized about halfway through my little rant that I wasn't really annoyed with Pam, I was annoyed with myself. The whole 'mine' thing, the way I let him talk me out of going to dinner with Amelia, the way I didn't even argue when he told me Pam would be staying here. I cared for Eric, possibly even loved him, I thought, but it still went against the grain and against my nature to have someone tell me what to do. Pam was a smart vamp, and tough, and in another circumstance I would bet she would be fiercely independent. I had no idea how she reconciled those qualities with her almost servile relationship with Eric. I wasn't sure I would ever be able to do that, and I wondered if Eric was expecting me to.

Whatever reaction I expected from Pam, it wasn't what I got. She smiled at me, and got a knowing look on her face. Then her smiled dropped as quickly as it appeared.

"I do have a choice, Sookie," she said, and she was very firm. "And I choose to listen to Eric."

"Why?" I asked, honestly curious.

"Eric has lived a very long time," Pam replied, her voice level. "Even in the vampire world he is considered sort of like a village elder. I trust his judgment." She paused, looked at me closely for a few moments. "You should trust him, too."

"Right," I said softly, not feeling like having to explain to Pam the finer points of normal male and female relationships in the real world. "You want to watch a movie?" I asked, changing the subject. Pam shrugged. I took that as a yes.

"Do you have any True Blood?" she asked as we headed back to the living room.

"I'll get you one," I told her and I went to the kitchen while Pam and Amelia decided on which movie to watch. I warmed up the blood and brought it to Pam and took my place on the sofa, not really interested in the movie that was starting. I was thinking about Eric, and I was unusually tense. There was a nagging worry in the back of my head, and I couldn't shake it even though I was trying. I kept looking at the clock about every fifteen or twenty minutes, completely distracted, wondering that he was doing. I heard Pam and Amelia talking and laughing a little as the movie dragged on, but it was like they were far away. Or maybe I was. I was in another world and I was shocked when Amelia spoke to me and I realized the movie was over and two hours had passed.

"That was freaky, Sook," my roommate said and I turned to look at her. "You looked like a vamp sitting over there, you were so still."

I repositioned myself on the sofa, and it was a little uncomfortable. I had been sitting in the same position, with one leg pulled up underneath me for a good while and I was stiff. I stood up slowly, stretching.

"I was just thinking," I said, laughing a bit at myself to alleviate some of the concern I saw in Amelia and Pam's eyes. "You want another blood?" I asked Pam and she handed me the empty bottle she had sat on the table.

"Sure," she told me, and I noticed she was watching me closely. I grabbed another bottle and popped it in the microwave. I got myself a glass of ice water and drank it down while the blood was heating up. As I came back into the living room I had a sudden wave of fear rush over me, and I actually stopped in mid-step. Pam was in front of me in an instant.

"What's wrong?" she asked, looking worried. "You've lost color."

I didn't doubt that. I felt like all the blood had run out of my whole body. But then the moment of fear passed, and I took a breath and steadied myself.

"I'm okay," I said, hoping I sounded more convincing than I felt.

I handed the bottle to Pam, walked back over to the couch and sat down, but the vampire didn't move. She just stood there in the middle of the floor, completely still, holding the bottle.

"Pam?" Amelia asked, worried.

Then the bottle Pam was holding broke into a thousand pieces in her hand, spraying the thick, red liquid all over, and she fell to her knees on the floor. Her face twisted in agony and her hands flew to head. She raised her head and screamed, a horrible, painful scream that terrified me in its intensity.

Amelia and I were at her side in an instant, and when I tried to touch her Pam smacked my arm away hard. She fell forward, her palms hitting the floor.

"Master," she whispered in a voice so chocked full of pain it chilled me to my core. "I'm coming, Master, please..."

I looked over Pam's head and caught Amelia's panicked eyes. Pam was talking about Eric. I felt my heart turn cold.

"What's happening?" Amelia screamed, reaching out to Pam, but stopping just short of touching her.

And just then Pam was herself again. She stood up in a move so fast it was just a blur to my eyes. Pam's face was composed again, but she was trembling. I had never seen Pam like this before and it was a terrible thing. She reached down with unsteady hands and found her cell phone. She flipped it open and punched in a number while Amelia and I just stared, afraid to speak or move. Pam waited. No one answered. She dialed again and it was the same.

"No! _NO_!" she screamed, and she grabbed her purse and was out the door in an instant. Amelia and I followed her.

"Pam!" I yelled as I saw her start to get in her car. She paused, stood still for a few seconds then turned to me.

"What's wrong?" I demanded, feeling a rising wave of panic. I ran over to her, looked in her eyes, grabbed her arm. "Is it Eric? Please, you have to tell me!"

Pam closed her eyes, seemed to steady herself. When she spoke again, it was calm, but not without a faint quiver.

"Eric has called me. I have to go."

"He _called_ you?" I repeated, horrified. "Why? What's wrong?"

"I don't know!" she said, raising her voice, and she turned away from me. "He's never called to me like that before, ever." She was looking straight ahead into the darkness, her eyes far away. "It was so strong," she continued quietly, her face looking deeply concerned. "And then he just stopped. That's not like Eric. Every time he's ever called to me it was a continuous pull, and he's never caused pain like that. He's never needed to. I've never disobeyed his call. He knows that. Why would he..." She trailed off, looked back to me and met my eyes. "I don't understand," she said so quietly I could barely hear.

"Pam, please," I begged her and she seemed to make a decision.

"Get in the car. You're coming with me," she ordered, then looked at Amelia standing on the porch and motioned to her. "You, too." She glanced at me. "Eric ordered me to protect you, and he's also called to me. I don't understand what's happening, but I'm going to try to obey both commands by taking you with me."

I paused, but only for a minute. I was desperate to know what was happening, and within a minute all three of us were in the car and Pam was racing down the road, slinging gravel and dirt. Her hands were clutching the steering wheel so hard I was surprised it didn't break. No one spoke for a long time; the atmosphere in the car was sparking with tension and fear.

Pam had her cell phone out and she kept trying to call Eric over and over on his cell. She tried calling Fangtasia, too and each time no one answered Pam became more and more agitated. Her fangs were out and her eyes were shooting sparks. She looked like she was possessed and I was praying we didn't get pulled over. Pam was driving erratically and very, very fast but I knew, in her current state, she would kill anyone that tried to get in her way. Amelia was in the backseat, and she and I were hanging on for dear life as Pam raced over one hundred miles per hour in her conservative but very powerful car, and we were flung from side to side violently as she took turns at breakneck speeds.

We made it to Shreveport in record time, and finally we came to the turn that would take us to Fangtasia. As soon as we cleared the corner we saw the lights and Pam started to shake. There were police and fire vehicles up and down the entire street, and traffic was blocked. People were standing around staring, and some people were taking pictures on cell phones and laughing and pointing. Billowing black smoke was spiraling into the air. Pam slammed the car into park, opened the door and took off down the street like a bullet. Amelia and I got out of the car more slowly, and stood beside the open doors, staring ahead with wide eyes. My heart was racing, and I heard Amelia say 'Oh my God' when we finally realized what was happening.

Fangtasia was burning.

-

_To be continued_

_Sorry, I know I promised to update Sunday but my weekend turned into a fiasco! I didn't even have a chance to send out my thank you notes to everyone who left a review, so I want to do that now. THANK YOU all very much! It is always appreciated greatly!  
_


	17. Chapter 17

Know Thyself

Chapter Seventeen

I registered the scene before me with horror. I could see the smoke spiraling up like a tornado above Fangtasia, and the sounds of sirens pierced the air. Injured fangbangers were stumbling around; coughing and cursing and frantic thoughts were slamming into me from all sides. Somewhere in this chaotic mess was my Eric.

Amelia and I slammed the car doors shut and started off down the street, only to be stopped quickly by a burly police officer walking toward us and holding his arms out to prevent our advance.

"Whoa there, ladies," he said and nodded at Pam's car. "You can't leave that car parked there, you have to move it. We got emergency vehicles that are going to need to get through here."

I could have hit him, and I actually considered doing just that for about two seconds before my common sense kicked in. I reeled in my frustration with effort. His brain was telling me he was a decent guy and he wasn't trying to cause us any trouble, he was just trying to do his job and keep the street clear. I turned to Amelia; she was staring at the cop.

"Where can we park it then?" she asked, and God bless her she sounded a lot more calm than I was.

"I don't care, but it's not gonna be on this street," the officer told us with a no-nonsense tone in his voice, then his expression changed a bit as he looked us over. "You look like nice girls. Y'all should probably just get yourselves back on home. We got us a rough crowd here and we don't need no one else getting hurt."

Amelia stiffened and started to make a remark, but I gave her a sharp look and shook my head just a fraction. The officer wasn't trying to be a condescending jerk, he was thinking about his own daughters and that he wouldn't want them around a dangerous situation like this.

"Yes sir," Amelia said, taking my hint. "I'll move it right now."

The officer nodded and then turned his attention to a news van that had pulled up and was trying to weave its way into the street. I heard the officer tell the news people they couldn't go any farther and they weren't nearly as polite in their response as Amelia had been.

"Go catch up with Pam," Amelia said quietly, grabbing my arm. "I'll take care of the car."

"Okay," I said, thankful beyond words for my roommate. I didn't know what was happening, and I didn't know what I could do, but I knew I had to do something. I had to find Eric. I glanced at the officer and found he was still heavily engaged in an argument with a mouthy news crewman who was yelling about freedom of the press and nazi police tactics. Even in my rattled emotional state I had to shake my head. I was pretty sure _that_ approach wasn't going to get the news van one inch farther down the street.

I ducked onto the sidewalk and started weaving my way through the throng of people that were standing around gawking at the carnage. I was on such an adrenaline rush I was having a lot of trouble maintaining any semblance of polite behavior as I bumped into one person after another in my attempt to get closer to the club. After what seemed like an eternity, I finally made it to the front of the crowd only to be stopped by more officers who were setting up temporary barricades around the building and stringing up yellow crime scene tape. I whipped my head around frantically, leaning as far as I could over the line of tape, searching for any sign of Pam or Eric or anyone I knew. I was in such a state of panic I felt like I was going explode at any second. I started making my way farther down the perimeter line, just to be moving.

I watched helplessly as firemen walked in and out of the front doors of the club, pointing and talking amongst themselves. I listened in on the brains around me and found out from a smallish man in a suit and tie and long black trench coat that he believed the destruction was caused by a bomb, and that there was a lot of damage. My hand went to my heart and I sucked in a sharp breath. The front of the club looked okay, so the destruction had to be concentrated in the back. Back where Eric was usually sitting when he enthralled the fangbangers; back where Eric's office was located. I started to shake, and then cry and I think I would have come completely unglued if not for a firm, cool hand that suddenly gripped my forearm.

"Pam!" I wailed, turning to look at her face with relief. "Did you find Eric?"

"Come with me," she said, not answering my question. She maneuvered her way through the crowd with much more ease than I had managed and before long I found myself at the rear of the bar, which was buzzing with activity. I saw Eric's red corvette parked in it's usual spot; it appeared to be undamaged, though it was peppered with dirt and debris. I watched as a paramedic crew carried out a severely injured fangbanger on a stretcher and a police officer was talking to an unfamiliar vampire off in a corner of the lot, asking questions and writing some things down in a black notebook. A couple firemen walked right in front of us and one of them was talking on a cell phone; he was telling whoever was on the other end of the line that there was at least one casualty and I felt my heart rate speed up. Pam must have noticed, because she turned to me and gave me a concerned look.

The suit and tie man whose mind I had read earlier came striding around the building just then, and behind him was a woman wearing a black jacket with the word 'coroner' on the back. They headed around to the back door and the man pointed inside.

"Up and to the right," he was telling the woman. "There's an office. Not much left of him, though."

I choked out a sound and Pam squeezed my arm. I felt faint and I may have sagged to the ground if not for Pam's voice in my ear.

"Follow me. Don't stop," she instructed and then she ducked under the police tape and I followed her closely. She slid into the back door with me on her heels and we pressed ourselves into a dark corner while Pam appeared to be listening to something only she could hear. The lights were all out and the building was dark except for the bouncing lights from flashlights and the faint glow coming through the open doors. There was a foul smell that I recognized all too well, though the last time I smelled it was when my own house had been set ablaze. The entire back of the bar was completely destroyed, wires and pieces of ceiling were hanging down, and debris littered the ground. The area of the bar that was home to Eric's usual chair was completely blown away and when I saw that a small sob escaped my throat. Pam said 'shhh' and I struggled to calm myself and remain silent.

A couple of uniformed men strolled passed us a few seconds later without looking in our direction, and once they were gone Pam tugged at my sleeve and we made our way quickly along the wall and up to Eric's office. I stood outside what was left of the door, absolutely unable to go in, afraid of what I might see. Pam didn't even hesitate, just strode into the office like she owned the place. Of course, I reminded myself, she actually _did _own the place. Half of it, anyway.

I peeked my head in and saw the room was empty except for the woman in the coroners jacket who was kneeling over something on the floor. She stood up when Pam entered and I pressed my back against the wall outside the door and closed my eyes, shaking. I realized for the first time I couldn't _feel_ Eric and the shaking became uncontrolable. Oh, please God, _No! _I wrapped my arms around myself, suddenly feeling very cold.

"Who are you?" I heard the coroner demand.

Pam's voice took on a soothing tone and she slowed her words when she answered. "My friend out there and I need to gather some personal items from this room, and I want you to stand outside the door and not let anyone in for a few minutes."

There was a rather substantial pause, but then I heard the woman say 'Okay' and she walked back out to the hall and stood beside me. She had a blank stare on her face and she might as well have had 'Kiss me, I'm glamoured' written on her shirt.

"Sookie, come in here. We don't have much time."

Something in Pam's voice roused me from the fear that had gripped me and I hesitantly pushed myself away from the wall. I took slow, unsteady steps into the room and glanced around, feeling my heart breaking as I did so. Eric's office looked every bit as bad as the rest of the building. The walls were riddled with holes, the furniture was destroyed and there were puddles of water on the floor from the fire hoses. There were several small, portable lighting units scattered around the room, and I saw Pam kneeling over a body on the floor. I exhaled with a profound relief when I realized the body was still intact, at least mostly. A vampire would have been nothing but black sludge by now.

"It's Bobby," Pam told me unemotionally, standing up but keeping her eyes fixed on the burnt corpse. "He meets with Eric every Sunday night to get his assignments for the following week."

"Thank God," I whispered, thankful beyond words it wasn't Eric. But then I squeezed my eyes shut when I realized what I'd said.

Pam looked at me with raised eyebrows and actually cracked a smile, but only for a moment. Then she was pacing the room, kicking over broken pieces of furniture and looking around on the floor. She reached out to move a large piece of drywall and I saw her eyes flash. She took a step back, summoned me over.

"What is that?" she asked, pointing to a strand of what looked liked wiring on the floor. I kneeled down and picked it up, blew on it to remove some of the dust that was coating it, and gasped when I realized what I was holding.

"It's silver," I said, and I got down knees, ignoring the cold water from the floor that soaked through my pants, and began to use my bare hands to brush away more dirt and loose papers and splintered wood from the floor. I found another silver strand, longer than the first, then another and another. I gathered all the pieces in my hand and pulled hard, and realized they were all part of one large, unit. I'd seen one of these before.

"It's a net," I said and I looked up at Pam who was staring straight ahead and not moving. I stood up and grabbed Pam's arm hard and she didn't budge, so I shook her a little and still got no response; it was like she was in a trance. I cursed under my breath and started looking around the room myself, taking care not to step on poor, dead Bobby Burnham. I didn't know what I was looking for, but I was desperate to find something, anything, that would help me figure out what had happened to Eric. A silver net certainly was not something a vampire would keep lying around his office, so someone - or several someones - had brought it in here. But for what reason? To kill? To incapacitate? My mind was racing out of control and I was trying to put all the pieces together, but I missing far too much of the puzzle to get a clear picture.

"He's not here," Pam said suddenly, finally breaking free of her trance. She looked at me. "Eric hasn't been killed, Sookie."

I breathed a sigh of relief and shut my eyes, felt my shoulders sag. The words sounded like music to my ears.

"Are you sure?" I asked her breathlessly, and she nodded slowly.

"Yes. I've talked to many vampires who have lost their sires and they all told me they felt differently afterward, as though a weight had been removed they never realized they were carrying." She took several steps closer to me, stared me right in the eyes. "I feel no different. I'd know if my maker were finally dead. I'm certain of it."

Pam walked past me and grabbed hold of Eric's big desk that had been overturned and was now scorched and water damaged. She pulled the desk upright like it was just a toy, and it crumbled under the pressure. Pam squinted, her vampire eyes catching something in the dark mine couldn't see. She reached down slowly, and picked up something from the floor by the shattered desk.

"Eric's cell phone," she said, holding it up. It was blackened and partially melted.

"His car is still here," I said softly. "And he would never go anywhere without his phone."

"He's been taken," she hissed, and she tossed the phone to the ground with disgust.

"Who would be strong enough to get the jump on Eric in his own bar? In his own _office_? Who would even try that, especially when the club is open and all those people are around?" I asked in disbelief. It sounded crazy.

"I don't know," Pam said harshly, and she turned her face to the ceiling and inhaled deeply several times. She walked slowly around the room, tasting the air.

"There was a vampire in here tonight," she said, and she closed her eyes.

I sucked in a sharp breath, immediately thinking of Victor, but Pam squashed that idea with her next words.

"Not a scent I recognize," she continued. "But it could be nothing more than a visitor to the area checking in with the Sheriff. I also smell the scent of humans, but there have been so many in and out of this room tonight it will be hard to track."

And just then, one of those many people came barging into the room.

"What the hell are you doing in here?" demanded the little man in the black trench coat I'd seen earlier. The woman with the coroner jacket was right behind him, in control of her own mind again, and looking more than a little confused. "This is a goddamned crime scene!" the man bellowed, enunciating every word dramatically. Then three more people in various official looking uniforms were there, crowding into the doorway. Pam bared her fangs and every single human in the room, including me, took a step backward in unison, like we'd rehearsed it. It would have been comical in another circumstance.

"You can't glamour them all," I whispered and Pam looked at me sideways and raised an eyebrow. For a second I thought she was going to try to prove me wrong, but then her fangs retracted and she shook her hair.

"My name is Pam," she said, turning on her professional air. "I'm owner of this establishment." She motioned to me with her hand, "This is my personal aide, Miss. Stackhouse. I was told I needed to identify this body." She nodded to Bobby and the atmosphere in the room seemed to calm a bit. The little man stepped forward slowly, cautsouly and his eyes were suspicious.

"I'm detective Everman," he said finally and he held out his hand. Pam didn't move and after an uncomfortable minute the detective dropped his hand and cleared his throat.

"We'll need to get some information from you ma'am, but we'll do that outside. This building is still unstable. And I'm afraid your aide," he looked at me with hard eyes, "will have to leave the premises."

"Of course," Pam said, as nice as she could be and she followed Detective Everman out of Eric's office and back down to the front door. I blinked when we walked back outside, the lights from the street feeling remarkably bright after being inside the darkened bar. I saw Amelia waving to us frantically just on the other side of the barricades. Pam was talking to the detective now so I walked over to my witch who was almost jumping and down with impatience.

"Okay, spill, what's going on?" she asked.

"Eric's not here," I told her and just saying the words sent a paralyzing shudder up my spine. "His daytime guy is dead."

"That Bobby person, the one we saw on the website?"

I nodded. "Yeah. And the bar is a mess. It doesn't look bad from out here, but the back area looks like a war zone."

"Holy shit," Amelia said. "So where's Eric then?"

And then the tears came. I had been holding myself together pretty well, but having to put into words what I feared just pushed me past the point of no return. Amelia reached over the barricade awkwardly to hug me. People were looking at us like we had lost our minds but I didn't care.

"We found a silver net in his office," I told her quietly, pulling away and wiping my face with my hands and sniffling. "Pam said he wasn't dead. You know, he's not finally dead."

"So what, then? You think somebody kidnaped him? You think the Fellowship has him? Maybe they're going to, like, hold him for ransom or something?"

I shook my head. "I don't know. We don't know anything more than what I just told you."

I didn't want to think of Eric in the hands of the Fellowship. If he had indeed been kidnaped, the only way they would possibly be able to hold him would be to keep him chained in silver. I started to cry again; I couldn't bear to think of Eric being tortured.

Amelia looked over my head and I turned around to see Pam walking toward us, her cell phone at her ear. She stopped when she was still several feet away from us, and she was talking too quietly for us to hear. She nodded a few times, and she didn't look happy at all, then she flipped her phone shut and closed the distance between us.

"I was able to reach Felicia," Pam told us. "She was injured during the explosion, and she escaped to her house before the human authorities arrived."

"Did she see what happened to Eric?" I asked, feeling a surge of hope that was quickly dashed by Pam's expression.

"No," Pam said with contempt and her fangs ran out a little. "The unthinking coward abandoned her duty and her Sheriff, and for that she will pay a high price. A very high price, if I have anything to say about it." Pam looked every inch a vampire as she said that.

"Did everyone else get away?" I asked, thought I was really only concerned with Eric at the moment. Pam snickered without humor.

"There is no one else," she said. "The King ordered every Vampire in the state to New Orleans to help track down those Fellowship fools. Eric was only permitted to keep two of us on staff to run the bar. And he was lucky. A few of the Sheriff's were only allowed a single minion."

"But we have to find Eric!" I said, raising my voice. "We'll need help to track down whoever took him, right? The King will have to send back Eric's vampires!"

Pam looked at me, and for just a second I thought I saw pity. That scared me in ways I didn't want to consider.

"The King doesn't _have _to do anything. Victor has been one of Felipe's Lieutenants for many, many years and New Orleans belongs to Victor. And more importantly, Area One brings in more money than Area Five because of the tourism. So making sure New Orleans is safe and thus profitable will be the King's priority. And that is as it should be."

I gasped, feeling helpless. I recognized Eric's pragmatism in his child's words. He had taught her well, I thought to myself. Too well. I needed an ally in this if I was going to help Eric. And I _was_ going to help Eric, even though I had no idea where to start. And I had no idea where he was or who took him. And I was just a mortal, human woman. And then the tears started flowing again, born of both anger and a terrible despair. I felt a huge, empty hole in my chest, where the part of my heart that belonged to my Viking vampire was shattering.

"I have to stay here," Pam said, ignoring my outburst of emotion. "Felicia was burned badly. Fire is very dangerous to us, and it causes a lot of damage and the healing is very painful. Felicia thinks it will be at least two days before she's well enough to return to work. Eric is gone, so Fangtasia is my responsibility, as are Eric's other business interests. I cannot leave Shreveport."

"What?" I asked, feeling my eyes go wide with disbelief. "_Eric is gone?_ That's it? You can't be serious! We have to figure out who took him!" I was really yelling now, and we were getting a lot of attention from the people still crowding around the perimeter.

Pam just looked at me, not understanding. "My priority is to serve my Sheriff. This is what he would expect of me, and I believe it is why he called me."

I shook my head, not believing what I was hearing. I had thought Pam would be more than willing to help me find Eric. There was no way I would be able to find him on my own. Desperation started to build up inside me as I saw my last hope slipping way and I spoke without thinking.

"I can't believe you're going to just give up on him." I all but spit the words at her. "And I actually thought you cared about him!"

Pam grabbed me by the back of the neck and jerked hard, pulling me to her until our faces were inches apart. Her fangs were still out and her eyes were blazing. I heard Amelia suck in a sharp breath.

"Do not question my loyalty to my maker. Ever."

Pam released her grip on my neck and pushed me back and I stumbled a little, scared and chastised by her reaction, but not exactly surprised. I knew it was a cheap shot when I said it, and as wound up as we all were I was probably lucky she didn't do worse.

There was a long, uncomfortable silence for a few minutes with all three of us, Pam, Amelia and I just standing there, looking at one another. It was like we all just mutually and silently agreed to step back and take a break and let some of the tension dissipate. It must have worked because when Pam spoke again, she sounded anything but angry.

"Sookie, I will need you to come and stay in Shreveport."

"What?" I asked, startled at the sudden request. "Why?"

"Eric told me to keep you safe. I can't stay in Bon Temps and Felicia will be unable to travel for several days. The only other option is for you to come here. You can stay at Eric's home during the day. It's quite safe."

"Pam, I have to work," I said, trying to keep my voice level and also trying not to provoke her anger again by arguing.

"I can take over your shifts, Sookie," Amelia volunteered, her voice tentative. Pam's very vampire behavior had shaken my roommate as much as it had me.

Pam was looking at me, and Amelia was looking at me and knew I was not going win here. Amelia had worked at Merlotte's, she knew the routine. And Sam would understand, I knew, though he wouldn't be too happy. And beyond that, being in Shreveport might actually help me figure out who or what took Eric since I'd be closer to the scene.

"Okay," I said finally, and everyone relaxed a little. "I don't have any clothes, though," I added. "Or a car."

"Yeah, that reminds me," Amelia piped up, "I'm going to need a ride home."

Pam stood still for a few minutes, deep in thought. I saw detective Everman walking toward us, his long coat blowing in the chilly air.

"We've got company," I said quietly and Pam snapped back instantly.

"Ma'am," the detective said politely. "We're ready for you again. If you'll kindly come with me please." He motioned with his hand and Pam held up a finger.

"My aide and her friend need to be leaving," Pam said smoothly, and I couldn't tell if she was using glamour on the detective or not. "She will need a clear path out of the area. Her car is parked in the back lot."

Amelia and I exchanged confused glances, and the witch shrugged.

The detective looked at me and Amelia a moment, then almost smiled. I heard in his mind that he was happy to be getting rid of two unnecessary civilians that were crowding his crime scene. If he had his way he would turn the fire hoses on the rest of the onlookers so they would leave, too. "I'll make sure she's allowed out of the area," the detective said and he called to a uniformed officer. Pam turned to us and spoke very quietly and very quickly.

"Do you have my keys?" she asked and Amelia handed Pam the purse she had left in her car.

Pam took her purse and fumbled inside. She retrieved her keychain and pulled a key off one of the rings and handed it to me.

"Take Eric's car. It's faster. Go straight home and do not stop. Drop off Amelia and pack some clothes and whatever else you need and come directly back here." Pam looked at her watch. "Do you have your phone with you?"

"No," I said at the same time Amelia said "I do."

"Good," Pam said, acknowledging Amelia. "Call me if you have any problems. Sookie, I will expect you back here by two fifteen. Don't forget to grab your cell phone. Call me when you're close so I can find you."

"Okay," I said and then the detective came back over with the other officer.

"Ladies," he said, looking at me and Amelia. "This officer will escort you to your vehicle and see to it that you get off the property safely."

We thanked him, and I caught Pam's eye as I walked past her. She winked at me after a moment and I tried to smile. Pam and I were okay. Now that I had calmed down I could see that we both wanted to help Eric, but our duties to that end were very different. I had no right to judge her and I knew I owed her an apology, but this wasn't the time.

We made it to the back lot and Amelia brushed off some of the loose debris from Eric's car.

"You mind if I drive?" she asked and I could hear in her mind she had always wanted to drive a corvette. I shrugged and handed her the key; I didn't feel a whole lot like driving, anyway. I felt raw, like I was going to break down again at any moment and I sure didn't want it to happen while I was flying down the highway.

We got in and buckled up, and the officer moved a few of the barricades so we could get out onto the street, and within a few minutes we were out of the business district and heading home to Bon Temps. Once we hit the highway it was almost eerily quiet and dark. There was hardly a soul on the road at this time of night; the moonlight was partially obscured by cloud cover. It was a doom and gloom kind of night, and it matched my mood perfectly.

I sat quietly, staring out the window of the car, feeling miserable. I was in Eric's car, and I could almost smell his unique scent lingering in the air. Oh _hell,_ there went the tears again. I was going to have a dehydration headache by morning, I just knew it.

Amelia tried to make some small talk, but I didn't even respond to her. Her mind was wide open, as always, and she was genuinely worried about me. She was afraid something really, really bad had happened to Eric, and she was afraid of what I would do if that was the case. I raised my mental shields after that. I didn't need anyone else's worst case scenarios in my head; I had quite enough of my own.

As we drove through the night, I calmed myself down and I started to make a plan. If the Fellowship had attacked Fangtasia and kidnaped Eric - and that was my best guess right now - then I needed to find out who the big names in the group were, the ones who would have the power to actually pull off something like that. The website Amelia had discovered would be a good place to start looking. I knew enough about computers to know that every website had to have a paper trail somewhere. Someone had to pay the bills to keep those sites running. And I knew at least one person that had the knowledge to help me figure out who was fronting the cash for the fellowship site. Oh, yes, I would be calling Bill as soon as I got home and had my cell phone in hand.

"Jesus Christ," Amelia said suddenly after about fifteen minutes. Her eyes were focused on the rear view mirror and they were wide. "That guy's flying!"

"Who?" I asked, turning around in the little car to stare through the back window. A pair of bright, high beam headlights were coming up behind us fast - too fast. I felt Amelia accelerate, but the lights just kept getting closer and closer until finally the big vehicle - I thought it was a Hummer - was right on our bumper. The bright lights were blinding us and we found out very soon that was exactly what the people in the big vehicle were aiming for.

Amelia and I both screamed out in unison as we felt and heard the sharp _thump _as the big truck rammed into the back of our car. The Corvette swerved sharply from right to left with the impact, but Amelia turned out to be a really good driver and she was able to regain control and straighten us out. Oh wow, was I ever glad I had let her have the keys! She accelerated again, and she put a little space between us and our pursuers, whoever they were.

"What the hell?" Amelia screamed, panic in her voice. "What are they doing?"

I reached out and latched onto the minds in the Hummer that was starting to catch up to us again. There were four humans in the car, and they were crazed, out of their minds with hate and a furor like I'd never heard. Their thoughts were all tangled together and I was so scared I was having trouble sorting them out, but I picked up a few:_ vamps, leeches, must kill them all, die, ram 'em Ed!_

"I think they're with the Fellowship," I said and Amelia risked a glance in my direction.

"Did they follow us?" she screamed. "I didn't see anyone following us! How would they know we're with the vamps?"

"Oh, my God!" I said as an idea dawned on me. "We're in Eric's car! His car was on that website!"

"There are a lot of red Corvette's," Amelia argued, looking in the rear view mirror with terror filled eyes.

"Not with a vanity plate that says 'bloodsucker'!" I screamed. She accelerated again and I risked a glance at the speedometer. We were going close to one hundred miles per hour, but I knew this car could do better.

"Go faster," I said, and just as I said it I heard the thoughts of the driver again and I knew they were preparing to ram us. I warned Amelia. Too late.

They hit us hard, and Amelia couldn't prevent the little car from careening out of control. We both screamed in fear as the car started to spin around wildly. Amelia was pulling on the wheel, trying without success to keep us from spinning. The trees on the side of the road were just a blur as we continued to spiral, and then it felt like we were flying and I realized the car was flipping. I heard the terrible sounds of crunching metal, and I heard Amelia cry out in pain. Then I heard a sound like huge balloons popping and I felt something hit me hard in the face as the car continued to tumble end over end before finally coming to a sudden, lurching stop. Then there was a terrible and complete silence and I felt blood in my mouth and a shooting pain in my leg and right arm.

I didn't move for a long while, I just sat still with my eyes closed and concentrated on breathing in and out. Finally I opened my eyes slowly and realized I was trapped behind a giant air bag. I lifted my left arm, the one that didn't hurt, and I pushed at the bag, thinking it was a lot harder than I would have thought. I touched my face and winced. My nose was bleeding and very painful and I suspected it might be broken. I was almost positive my right arm was probably broken, too since I could barely even move it. I looked over to check on Amelia and my breath caught in my lungs when I saw my roommate.

Amelia was covered in blood and glass from the shattered windows, and she was unconscious. Her dark hair was spilled across her silent face and it was sticky with blood coming from a nasty looking head wound. She was breathing, so I knew she was still alive. Little bubbles of blood escaped her lips and nose with every exhale. The driver's side door was caved in and I saw part of the metal frame was digging into Amelia's left side. She needed to get a hospital. Well, so did I, but at least I was conscious!

Seeing my friend like that rallied me, gave me a purpose that helped me to push away the stabbing pains. I wiggled as much as I could in the little space and I reached across my body with my left hand and found the door latch. I was praying the door wasn't damaged too badly and luck was with me. I was able to unlock the door, and after a few more minutes of struggle I used my shoulder and leg to push it open.

I was abe to get myself out of the seat belt and twist my body around enough to get out of the car. More like I _fell_ out of the car, and I grunted in pain when I hit the ground. I pushed myself up and looked around, trying to get my bearing. The car had left the road and we had landed in a small ravine surrounded by trees. Eric's beautiful corvette was destroyed; the front end completely smashed from the huge tree we hit that finally stopped the car. Steam was rising from the hood of the car and I smelled burnt rubber and gasoline.

I grabbed hold of the car for support and painfully inched my way around to the driver's side, and tried to open the door without success. The door was all buckled in and there was no way I would be able to free Amelia without help. _Help_, I thought to myself, feeling the effects of the pain and the blood loss starting to kick in. I was really struggling to focus now.

"This would be a really good time for you to pop in, Claudine!" I said as loud as I could, raising my face to the dark sky and then giggling in spite of the pain. My fairy cousin had warned me many times she wasn't all knowing, and she couldn't always get to me as fast as she wanted, but I hoped like crazy she was at least on the way right now.

But since there was no useful purpose in waiting around for a fairy that may or may not be showing up anytime soon, and since I had a friend that desperately needed me, I forced myself to concentrate. I knew I was the only hope for Amelia now, and for myself, so I couldn't let myself pass out or give up.

Okay, I needed to call for help. I had to find the cell phone Amelia had been smart enough to grab before we left the house tonight. I looked in the car, my eyes straining in the darkness. I was feeling around with my hands, and finally felt a strap I recognized as belonging to Amelia's purse. I tugged hard, and managed to free the little purse from under Amelia's trapped leg where it had fallen. I unzipped it and reached in, finding the cell phone.

Then something grabbed my shattered right arm and the pain was so intense I dropped the phone on the seat and cried out in agony. I turned my head and in a heartbeat every bit of pain in my body meant absolutely nothing to me. I had much bigger problems.

"It's lovely to see you again, Miss. Stackhouse," Victor Madden said politely, stepping back a bit and bowing formally at the waist. Then he righted himself and smiled at me broadly. The clouds moved a little just then, and the night sky cast an eerie glow down through the trees. The moonlight glinted off Victors fangs as they slowly and ominously descended.

I would have screamed, but I knew, as sure as my name was Sookie Stackhouse, it wouldn't do a bit of good.

-

_To be continued_

_Update coming soon (no later than this weekend!) Again, thanks for all the support and reviews and for sticking with me through this adventure!_


	18. Chapter 18

Know Thyself

Chapter Eighteen

Victor looked at me from head to toe with an expression I could only classify as concerned. Knowing what I knew about him, it was obviously false concern. He was smiling, and with his fangs out it was an unsettling sight. Other than that he looked very much as he did the night I first met him; he was wearing a casual suit and loose tie, polished shoes. He didn't bother with a pocket handkerchief tonight. Apparently he reserved those for extra special occasions; killing of Queens, state takeovers, that sort of thing.

The vampire took one step toward me and I took one step back; the only step I could take before I was stopped by the wreckage of Eric's corvette. My mind was racing and I was trying desperately to formulate a plan, to come up with something that could save me from my current predicament. I was praying for Claudine to appear, or Niall, and even a small part of my mind was half-hoping Eric would swoop down like Superman and carry me away to safety. A long, long moment passed, and somewhere in that moment the realization sank in that supernatural assistance was not forthcoming this time. I was on my own, and it was terrifying. I was alone, terribly injured and all-too human, in a ditch on the side of the road in the middle of the night with a vampire that wanted me dead. Or worse. I was in quite the proverbial pickle.

"What do you want with me?" I asked. I had found my voice though it sounded pitifully weak.

Victor raised his eyebrows and had the audacity to look, well, he looked amused.

"My dear Sookie," he said in his deep, rich voice "I'm here to help you, of course."

Uh huh. Help me right into the grave, no doubt about it. I risked a glance behind me for just a moment to check on Amelia; she was still out. Victor continued, and he moved in even closer to me.

"When I received word about the terrible tragedy at Fangtasia tonight, I came right away." Victor shook his head, looking for all the world like he was truly heartbroken. "I've been tracking the suicidal fools that attacked my city, and my search was already leading me toward Shreveport. It pains me that I - and the others - couldn't apprehend the vigilantes before they were able to kill Eric. I understand you and he were quite close."

"Eric isn't dead," I said in a whisper, and I wasn't really sure who I was trying to convince.

Victor bowed his head for a moment and I think he was trying to hide a smile, then he looked at me intently and closed the last bit of distance between us. He wasn't too much taller than I, but the way the ground was leveled it gave him additional height so I was forced to look up at him. I saw his nostrils flare and recognized the hungry look in his eyes when he smelled my blood. He reached up with one hand, finger extended, intending to wipe some blood from my face but I smacked his hand away with my one good arm.

"Don't touch me," I said, putting as much strength in my voice as I could, though it wasn't much.

Victor grinned at me and his eyes crinkled at the corners. It reminded me of a proud papa grin and a shudder rippled down my spine.

"My, but you do have some fight in you, don't you?" he said, and he actually laughed. It was a jovial laugh, and it surprised me. Considering the circumstance, I would have expected more of a diabolical cackle if anything.

He reached for me again and this time he caught my arm easily as I raised it to block him. He held my forearm with one hand and with the other he grabbed my hair and held it firmly, then he leaned forward and began lapping up the blood from my face. I struggled, but he had me tightly controlled, so I was forced to endure him. I felt disgusted, especially when he made an appreciative sound as he licked me, his tongue making long, slow strokes across my cheeks and forehead. He was quite thorough, and seemed to make a special point of completely cleaning the blood that had trailed from my nose, down my chin and onto the front of my neck. After what seemed like an eternity, he stepped back and released my hair. He ran his tongue over his lips and his eyes closed slightly.

"I heard you had a little touch of fairy in you. I can taste it." He smiled at me again. "Exquisite. Is this why the late Viking valued you so highly?"

Hearing him mention Eric in past tense both enraged and terrified me. Despite Pam's assurances that she would know if Eric had been killed, I still had my doubts. I tried to push aside the negativity, tried to rally myself.

"Eric is not dead," I repeated, this time more strongly. "And I am _his_. He will kill you when he finds out what you've done. You can count on that." I all but spit the words in his face, but it didn't seem to faze the vampire at all.

"My dear," Victor said in a soothing, almost caring, voice, "I'm afraid you're experiencing what the experts call...denial. Let me assure you, Eric Northman is no more." He sounded pretty darn certain, and he also sounded pleased. I felt my heartbeat begin to race and my blood went cold when the realization hit me that Victor may well have been the one responsible for Eric's strange disappearance. Dear God, could Pam really be wrong?

"What have you done with Eric?" I demanded, shaking. Victor's eyes went wide, and his brows rose.

"What have _I _done? Why, nothing; nothing at all. I have no claim on the Viking. I hold no grudge against him. In fact, I'm sick at heart over his tragic end." He shook his head sadly and reached over to me and played with a piece of my hair as he spoke. "Eric Northman was a powerful vampire, and he maintained a profitable and productive area. The King held him in great esteem, as you know. It's a terrible pity that the mighty Viking, who had lived so long and survived so much, was ultimately defeated by simple, fanatical humans."

"I don't believe you," I said, feeling tears of rage start to well up and spill out. "You did something to him, didn't you?"

Victor sighed. "Sookie, the only vampire you need to concern yourself with from now on is _me_."

He smiled again, but this time there was no humor behind it, only a ruthless conviction. "You should be grateful, you know."

I puffed out a breath and shook my head. "No," I breathed, and I tried to retreat but there was nowhere to go.

"I heard about Eric, and his poor human assistant," Victor began "And despite the grave situation in my own city, I came here as fast as I could to find you, to make certain you're safe. You're under the King's protection, after all."

The way he was saying all this, I wasn't sure Victor was even really talking to me; it was like he was rehearsing for a performance.

"And what do I find when I arrive?" he continued dramatically. "Why, I find you being chased down by the same Fellowship fanatics that most likely bombed Fangtasia and killed Eric and Mr. Burnham. And then you're forced off the road in a terrible crash, and your poor friend is killed..."

"Amelia wasn't killed," I interrupted, speaking slowly through clenched teeth. Panic was bubbling inside me as the pieces of Victor's plan began to fall into place.

"Oh, but I'm afraid she will be found quite dead," the vampire said gravely. "And then there is you, of course..."

As Victor continued his speech, I moved my arm behind my back and began to surreptitiously attempt to maneuver the silver bangle bracelets I had never removed. I wanted to get them out from under my shirt sleeve and down my wrist and into my palm. It was hard to do with one hand, but slowly, little by little, I felt them begin to slide off. Victor didn't appear to notice. He seemed to be enthralling himself with his own cleverness as he continued his monologue.

"...I find you thrown from the wreckage, terribly injured and barely clinging to life." He touched his hand to his heart and held it there. "And in a moment of compassion - and out of my considerable respect for the King and the late Viking - I save your life. I make you vampire." Victor really smiled now, and made a magnanimous gesture with his hand as he spoke the words. "I will be honored for protecting such a unique asset. And you and your amazing talents will become mine, and mine alone."

I had never felt such anger as I did at that moment. He was going to drain me and turn me and then he was going to finish off Amelia just so he could add plausibility to his story. I hated Victor Madden at the moment as much as I had ever hated anyone in my life.

"I will never be yours," I said, looking him straight in the eye. "Even if you turn me, it won't stop the truth from coming out. I will tell everyone what you've done."

Victor chuckled, and his eyes glinted. "That will be hard to do when I rip out your tongue. It will take months to grow back, and if you still haven't learned your place, I will rip it out again. And no one will question me; they can't. I will be your maker; I can do with you what I want, when I want. And no one will be surprised if it takes decades of harsh punishments for you to learn obedience," Victor laughed without humor. "Your stubbornness is quite well known, after all."

He looked at me thoughtfully while I thought I was going to pass out from horror. "And believe me, you _will_ learn. You will hold your silence and you will serve me without question." He paused and seemed to let that thought hang in the air for a few minutes. Then his voice turned warm again. "Of course, I'd much prefer it if you would simply accept the inevitable. I'm not a monster, child. Your Viking is dead, and your future is with me. We could have a very productive relationship, free of pain and torture, if you would just accept my gift of immortality without a fight."

I choked back the nausea that was threatening to overtake me. I steeled myself, and decided if I was going to die on the side of this road I was going to go down swinging. If Victor Madden wanted a piece of me, he definitely had a fight on his hands. Gran didn't raise a coward.

Just then, as if on cue, Amelia made a little moaning sound and Victor spared a glance into the car. I used that moment of distraction to my advantage and I raised my arm and shoved my hand, which was now holding the silver bangle bracelets, right into Victor's face. He screamed as the silver burned into his flesh and he staggered back a step, cursing. I shoved the bracelets at him again, aiming for his eyes, and he bellowed in pain. Then I ripped the long silver necklace off and used it like a whip; I swung it at his face, neck and hands over and over and over, and each strike left a thin, smoking trail on his skin.

I knew silver caused weakness as well as pain, and I didn't ease up my assault until Victor's knees buckled and he went down to the ground. Then I backed away quickly, keeping my eyes on him and keeping the silver chain held at the ready. He looked at me and his lips curled back and he growled so I stepped over to him again and lashed at him a few more times for good measure. He fell onto his back and writhed in pain but I knew I didn't have much time before he recovered. I turned and ran back to the car and grabbed up the cell phone. I flipped it open and started to dial 9-1-1 but it was hard since I was working against pain and a a probable broken arm.

Before I could complete the call, Victor was on me again, and this time he didn't wait around to regale me with stories before he struck. I tried to use the silver on him again but he was prepared this time and he wrapped his arms around my chest and lifted me off the ground. I screamed in pain as he squeezed me hard; so hard I couldn't get a breath. The silver chain fell from my hand but Victor didn't release the vice grip on me until I was gasping and choking for air. He finally let go and tossed me to the ground like I was a doll. I landed on my stomach and my face hit the dirt; it was agonizing because my nose was already broken. Then I felt Victor's weight on top of me; he was on my back holding me down. I felt the top of my shirt being torn, and then I felt Victor's fangs rip into the skin on my shoulder.

I screamed and kicked and fought as best I could while pinned on my stomach, but the vampire was strong, so strong, and there was nothing I could do to get him off of me. He was drinking from me roughly and it hurt like hell. I felt myself become light headed from blood loss and I didn't think things could get any worse until I felt something hard start to press against the back of my thigh.

Victor pulled his fangs out of me, but the relief only lasted a few seconds. His hunger faded momentarily but a different lust was on him now and he began to grunt and grind himself against me. I felt his hand move in between us and I heard the unmistakable sound of a zipper being opened. He rolled off of me and I tried to crawl away but he grabbed my leg, flipped me onto my back and began to pull at my pants. His eyes were crazed, my blood was all over his mouth and he looked anything but the polished, jovial vampire he had always before tried to personify.

He was succeeding in his efforts to rid me of my clothes and I had a truly terrible moment of utter hopelessness and inevitability. I was fighting and clawing at him like a wild animal, but deep inside I knew it was a losing battle. He tore my pants right down the seam, ripping apart my underwear at the same time, and then he was on top of me again, forcing my legs apart and shoving his hand underneath my shirt and bra in the same instant, He grabbed my breast roughly, digging his fingers into my skin and I craned my head back wailed in agony and tried to push him back by shoving the heel of my hand into his nose. He didn't even flinch.

Victor growled and slammed his fangs deep into my neck and began sucking down mouthfuls of blood. I could feel his body ready to violate me in the worst way, and then - to my utter horror - I was in his head.

His vampire mind was a tangled, cold web of primal urges and violence. He was drunk with his own imminent victory, and I understood from his broken and twisting thoughts that his victory was one born of masterful planning and unprecedented scheming. He was a legend in his own mind, quite literally. But aside from that, and more pertinent to the situation at hand, Victor was heady with lust and power; power over me, and over Eric - who he truly did believe to be finally dead.

Hearing those thoughts about Eric tormented me; almost made me give up, but then Victor's mind turned even more vile, even more terrible. He was thinking about how this was the beginning of my training, of my eventual breaking. His violation of my body would be the last thing I felt as a human, and the first thing I felt when I rose as vampire.

Hearing his plans for my degradation brought back an onslaught of long-buried and unwelcome memories. And all of a sudden I was a little girl again; I was seven years old and I was hiding behind a couch while my Great-Uncle called to me. I could hear in his mind what he was planning to do to me and I held my hands over my ears to try to shut it out. But I couldn't; I was so little, and I hadn't learned to shield myself from the voices yet. So I was forced to endure my Uncle's every fantasy and perversion; I heard them all in my head, sometimes even more torturous than the vile deeds themselves.

I was snapped back into the moment sharply when I felt myself start to grow cold as Victor continued to drain me. I felt his body pressing hard against my entrance and I reminded myself I was _not_ that scared and helpless little girl any longer. Yes, Victor Madden was a vampire, so he was stronger. No, I couldn't fight him off and I knew that. He was going to take my body, and he was going to take my life, but I _did not_ have to hear him in my head while he did it. He could not violate my mind unless I allowed him. And I would _not_.

With the last remaining strength of will I possessed, as I felt my consciousness slipping away and Victor's body force itself inside me, I screamed _NO!_ and threw up my mental shield with everything I had.

And suddenly my mind was my own again. There was a silence that was so blessed and so welcome that I didn't even realize for a moment that my physical self was my own again, as well. No part of Victor Madden was violating me any longer; not his mind, not his fangs or his body. I turned my head and saw the vampire standing up and staring around with wide eyes from several feet away.

My vision was blurred and I was fighting to stay awake, but I thought I saw a faint white light. I thought I saw Victor reach out as if to touch the light and then jerk away as if stung. In my semi-conscious state I was amused to see the big, bad vampire standing there looking confused with his pants half on. But then the light became brighter and more intense. It lit up the area like a beacon and I saw Victor get a panicked look on his face. He looked at me sharply, then looked up and stared off into the distance like he heard something. Then he reached out with one hand again, poking at the air with a mystified expression. He glanced back at me one final time with anger filled eyes and then fled into the darkness.

The light seemed to get closer, brighter and finally my addled and pain-filled brain registered that it was actually two separate lights; it had only appeared to be a single light due to my blurred vision. The two lights came closer still, bouncing a little and I had to close my eyes against the glare. The lights stopped and I heard the sound of slamming doors and voices at the same time I heard a familiar_ pop!_

I felt what was left of my clothes being pulled around me, and I felt soft hands gently move under my shoulders and legs. I felt myself being lifted and my head lolled back. I forced my eyes to focus and I looked up into Claudine's beautiful, tear-streaked face. She pressed her lips to my forehead as she carried me wordlessly back to the wrecked car. I heard Amelia moaning in pain, heard an unfamiliar man's voice saying he was going to call an ambulance and to just hang on.

I was alive, I thought to myself, and I probably would have cried if I had any energy left inside me. I understood that Amelia was going to be saved, and Claudine was with me and that I was safe, at least for now. Something inside me - the thing that had kept me fighting and prevented me from giving up - finally cracked and broke under the pressure of my profound relief. I felt myself drifting away, and just before I lost consciousness I thought I heard the sound of Amelia's cell phone ringing.

-

_To be continued_

_So the chapter was shorter this time, but I'm afraid the next one will be a monster! Thanks again to my wonderful beta S. Meadows (you rock chica!) and to everyone that left a review and/or added this story to their alerts. xoxo _


	19. Chapter 19

Know Thyself

Chapter Nineteen

I woke up feeling a throbbing pain in my arm and my legs and many more, smaller pains in various other locations. Crap. That meant it wasn't all just a bad dream. _Is it ever?_ I asked myself, and very nearly smiled. I also felt a little giddy, of all things.

I opened my eyes and struggled to focus. I was in my own bed, and for a few fleeting seconds I wasn't happy about that at all. I was probably getting blood all over the sheets and I had just changed them....

"She's awake."

I turned my head - not without discomfort - and looked at Claudine, who was standing next to me by the bed. She was doing some adjustments on tall, metal rack that held a couple bags of blood. I followed the long, clear tubes that were attached to the bags. They stretched down the length of the I.V. unit and I saw they disappeared under the blankets. I pushed back the comforter and saw that someone had placed a needle in my arm, and the blood was flowing into my veins. My other arm, the throbbing one, was wrapped up in some kind of splint. Okay, so my fairy was also schooled in basic first aid. Nice touch.

I wiggled a little, tried to sit up, but then a firm hand touched my shoulder. I nearly yelped before I saw that it was Claude, leaning over the bed on the opposite side from Claudine.

"Don't move," he said. His eyes were almost glowing, and his long dark hair fell forward a little on his face. His utterly gorgeous face. I turned back to Claudine, then to her brother. They both looked amazing, perfect and healthy. I felt like a toad lying there between them. If I looked even half as bad as I felt, I knew I must be a frightening sight.

"What are you doing here?" I asked Claude, and the words were barely audible. My throat was killing me.

"He brought the medical equipment and hooked you up," Claudine answered gently, and smiled proudly at her brother. "He's taken a few classes. You lost a lot of blood, we've been replacing it."

Wow, I'm sure glad it wasn't cherry Kool-Aid in those bags. I almost snickered, and had no idea where that was coming from.

"He gave you a shot, too," Claudine continued, "for the pain."

Ah. That explained my loopy feeling. But a sudden thought sobered me up pretty fast.

"Where's Amelia?" I asked. The night's events were slowly beginning to come back to me. I almost wished they wouldn't. "Is she okay?"

Despite Claude's admonition to stay down, I tried to sit up and it hurt. I didn't even want to think what I'd feel like without the shot. I managed to push myself up on one elbow. It ached to talk, and the wounds on my neck from Victor's attack were making every movement a struggle. I made a conscious effort to ignore the pain; I didn't want to give Victor the pleasure. Not that he was here to see the damage, but even so it made me feel better to take back a little control.

"Don't worry," Claudine said, and she sat down next to me on the bed. "The witch was taken to the hospital. She's going to be fine." Her reassuring words relaxed me and I slumped back down into the pillow. I closed my eyes and thanked God as Claudine continued. "Some people driving down the road saw the skid marks and thought someone might be hurt, so they came to investigate. They called an ambulance."

"Good Samaritans," I whispered, and smiled a little. Just regular, everyday, decent people; there weren't too many of those around anymore it seemed.

"Good what?" Claude asked, sounding confused. I shook my head.

"Nothing. So why didn't I go with her to the hospital?" I asked as another wave of pain pounded through my arm. I winced. I was grateful for my cousin's help, but whatever drug he gave me wasn't really doing the trick. I wasn't big on taking medication, but I sure wouldn't turn down a big dose of the same painkiller I was given when I was staked in Jackson.

The fairy twins exchanged a guarded look, then Claude raised his perfect eyebrows and looked at his sister expectantly, almost smirking. Claudine looked sheepish.

"Claudine?" I asked with some irritation. I was not in any mood to play the beat-around-the-bush game tonight.

"I was going to let you go in the ambulance with your roommate, but that vampire Pam insisted I bring you here."

"You talked to Pam?" I croaked, and Claudine nodded.

"Amelia's phone kept ringing. Normally I wouldn't touch another person's phone, but the caller seemed to be very insistent. After about the fifth or sixth call, I answered."

"And it was Pam," I said softly. Of course, she would have been calling to find out why I was late getting back to Shreveport. "Okay, what did you tell her?"

"I told her what happened," the fairy answered, then paused. "More or less."

Uh huh. My guess was probably less than more. Pam was probably ready to spit nails.

I stared at Claudine and hoped my expression was one that meant business. "And Pam told you what, exactly?"

Claudine's shoulders sank. "She told me to bring you here."

"And you did?"

Claudine paused, then nodded. I giggled in spite of myself. I couldn't let this go.

"Well, hel-lo tall, brunette and _fairy_! You in the habit of doing what vamps tell you to do?"

Claude burst into rolling laughter and Claudine looked almost ready to cry. I was just tired, worried and in a lot of pain. My nose was busted, my arm was definitely broken, I was battered and bruised and every time I moved the fang wounds on my neck and shoulder lit up and felt like fire under my skin. Plus I had a powerful impulse to take a long shower.

I decided I was going to the hospital, even if I had to drive there myself.

I started to push myself up to a sitting position and gave Claudine a warning look when she went to intercept me. She sighed, but finally helped me sit up against the headboard. I looked down and for the first time I realized I was wearing one of my oversize sleeping shirts. I hoped Claudine had been the one to change me. Not that it really mattered; seeing me naked wouldn't do a thing for Claude. I stole a quick glance at him again. Such a waste.

"What time is it?" I twisted my neck to try to see the clock. _Ouch. _

"Almost five," Claude answered. "Why?"

"I have to call Pam," I said, and I took my only free hand and wiggled it out from under the blankets and pointed to my purse that was sitting in the chair on the other side of the room. "I need my cell phone."

"The vampire is on the way here now," Claudine said. "She said she had to finish up a few things in Shreveport and then she would be here."

"It's close to dawn," I frowned.

"She was insistent. She said she had to speak to you, and she was afraid the hospital wouldn't allow her in to see you."

I snorted. Pam, I knew, didn't give a flying fig about human rules and regulations. She would easily glamour her way into the hospital if she wanted to. But maybe, I thought, maybe she had found out something about Eric? My hopes soared at the prospect, and for just a moment I didn't feel a bit of pain. But then I remembered Victor's words, and more than that I remembered his _thoughts_, and my hopefulness plummeted. The pain returned and I grimaced.

I noticed that Claudine was watching me intently. She opened her mouth to say something, then stopped herself. She glanced at Claude.

"Can I have a moment alone with Sookie here, brother?" she asked. Claude grunted and pushed himself away from the wall where he had been standing. More like posing, really. Male models. I rolled my eyes.

Claude walked around the bed without a word, pausing just briefly to touch his sister on the shoulder. He squeezed it gently then left the room, shutting the door behind him. Claudine looked at me, and her eyes were pained.

"I am _so sorry_," she said, leaning over to me and touching my arm. "I failed you. I should have been faster. I tried. I should have tried harder. I _know_ I could have come sooner if I just....'

"Claudine, shut up."

My fairy cousin fell silent immediately and stared at me with wide eyes. I raised my hand, being careful of the IV tubes, and rubbed my face. I chuckled a little when I felt the hard bandage across my nose; I hadn't even realized it was there. It reminded me I hadn't used one of my pore cleaning strips in a while. Oh wow, what I thing to think of right now. Maybe that shot was stronger than I thought.

"I'm not worthy to be your guardian," Claudine said very softly. I sighed.

"You can't be everywhere at once," I told her, feeling annoyed that I had to have this conversation with her when I had a dozen other things that desperately needed my attention.

True, I wished like hell Claudine had been there about fifteen minutes earlier, but if I was being honest with myself I had to admit that my life was my own. My problems were my own, either by chance or by my choices. The fact I somehow lucked into getting a fairy guardian didn't give me a free pass on all the bad things that were in the world. And besides, Claudine _had_ saved me. Yes, I was in pain right now, and every single part of the body felt bruised and battered and violated, but by God I was still alive. I was a living, breathing, flesh and blood woman. And in my mind, that was a major victory and I wasn't about to let Claudine beat herself up.

"You got there in time," I said, and I tried to smile even though it hurt.

Claudine looked down at her hands, and then her gaze shifted. I followed her eyes and saw my pile of torn and bloody clothes lying in a heap near the foot of the bed. I would burn them later.

"I told Niall," she said and my head jerked.

"Claudine, I asked you not to do that! I don't want to start a war!"

My fairy straightened her back and sat up tall. "I didn't violate your confidence. You asked me to not to tell Niall that you thought someone might _try_ to hurt you. Someone _did_ hurt you, that's different. I have an obligation to Niall, too."

"It's still not worth starting a fight! Besides, you got Victor off me before he could do what he intended. That's the important thing." I noticed that Claudine went very still at the words and she didn't speak for a long time.

"What?" I asked finally, getting irritated.

"I didn't save you from the vampire," she said, and lowered her head.

"Yeah, you did," I said, frustrated. "He was draining me and he was..." I stopped. I couldn't say the words; just thinking about it infuriated me. I took a breath. "And then he was off me and you were there."

Claudine's face softened and she reached over to touch me but stopped before making contact.

"I didn't get him off you," she said with a little smile. "You did."

"Excuse me?" I said, not liking the way she was looking at me just then. It was a look I had unfortunately become very familiar with; it was the look of someone that knew something I didn't, something important.

"And how did I do that?" I asked, curiosity warring with sarcasm in my voice.

"I can't tell you."

"Oh for the love of...." I started to mutter, then closed my eyes and shook my head.

I was done with this. I kicked my legs as best I could and pushed the blankets and sheets down. I twisted around, being careful of the tubes in my arms, and maneuvered my legs so I was sitting on the bed. Claudine was on her feet now and she was looking at me wide-eyed as I struggled to stand up.

"What are you doing?" she exclaimed, taking hold of my arm. I pulled away from her. I was feeling stronger now, partially due to the blood - I noticed the second bag was almost empty now - and partially because I was just downright mad.

"I'm getting up," I said through my teeth. It really did hurt to move, but I was on a mission.

"Sookie, please get back in bed," Claudine said. She wasn't demanding, but it was close.

"No! If you won't tell me what the hell is going on, I'm going to call someone that will."

Eric had told me that if anything happened to him, I was to call Niall and tell him everything. I was going to do just that, and while I was at it I was going to get some answers. Some real answers. I was still mortal and I didn't have time to play games.

"Sookie," Claudine started to say and I shot her a look that must have been pretty intense because she rocked back on her red high heels and apparently re-thought whatever she was going to say. I took a step, and nearly fell; Claudine caught me, looked me in the eyes.

"Okay," she said, sounding defeated. "Okay, I'll tell you, but you have to get back in bed." I just looked at her and her shoulders slumped. "At least sit back down. Please Sookie."

I was almost ready to fall down, so sitting sounded very good right then. But I wasn't about to let Claudine know that. I forced myself to stay on my feet for an appropriate length of time that made it clear I wasn't just obeying without thinking. My Gran would have given me a lecture about pride and foolishness, but I was tired of being handled by groups of people more powerful than I.

Once I was safely back on the edge of the bed, Claudine knelt in front of me. She looked troubled.

"I'm not supposed to tell you this," she began hesitantly. "Niall already had words with me for revealing more than I should."

"Right. He told me you shouldn't have said anything to me about your 'working your way up'."

Claudine nodded. "He didn't want to overwhelm you. He knew you had the spark, but he still wasn't sure you be able or willing to understand our purpose."

Okay, now we were getting somewhere.

"The spark?" I repeated. "The essential spark?"

Claudine stared at me wide-eyed. "You know about that?"

I forced myself not to smile. It was fun being the one to give a surprise instead of the other way around.

"I know some," I said, being very careful to keep my poker face going. I honestly didn't know diddly about this spark thing, except the minimal information supplied by Amelia, but I wasn't going to let Claudine know. I was hoping she would let something slip if she thought the cat was already out of the bag. She looked at me carefully for a little while, like she was trying to make a decision.

"Niall said the essential spark passed Jason," I volunteered, hoping to jump-start the conversation again. "I took that to mean it had not passed _me_."

That got a response. Claudine breathed out a long sigh and then actually smiled.

"No," she said dramatically. "No, it did not pass you." She reached over and took hold of my arm, but pulled it back when I flinched. I was still very sore, though I was starting to feel the effects of the pain shot now.

"Sookie, you have no idea how it thrilled Niall when he found you, when he realized you held the potential!"

Claudine was becoming for animated with every word, and it seemed to me like she had been holding this all in, and was greatly relieved to be able to let it out. She didn't act like she was going to stop, and I decided to just let her roll without interrupting.

"There are so few of us now, cousin," Claudine said, and her eyes were glowing with delight. "It's so rare to find a part fae human with the spark, and with your fae streak being so small... well, we weren't holding out much hope for you."

"You weren't?" I asked, growing more confused by the second but utterly fascinated by the influx of new information. This conversation was rapidly turning into a sort of train wreck, and even though I had a strong suspicion I should, I just couldn't _not_ stop Claudine.

"No! But Niall is very magical, and his lineage is very strong. He was vigilant about locating you after Fintan died. Niall is getting old, and some of us thought he had gone mad, the way he was so obsessed with finding you. But when he finally did, and we saw how you had already started to manifest your fae abilities, we were all just as excited as Niall!"

Then I had to stop her, and I help up my hand, never taking my eyes away from Claudine's. I was trying my best to absorb what she was saying, I really was, but this was information overload and I was still in a lot of pain as well as being a little fuzzy in the head. I needed to slow things down.

"Alright," I began slowly, choosing my words carefully. "I know I'm part fae. A very small part. But I asked Niall about my telepathy. He never told me it was caused by my fairy heritage."

"Oh, it isn't!" Claudine explained, still bubbling over with enthusiasm."We believe the telepathy came through from Fintan's human side," she said with a bit of disdain, but then hurried to backpedal, out of fear of insulting me, I thought. "I mean, it's a very great gift, and it may well be based in magic; no one really understands exactly how these things work. Many times certain magical abilities appear at random."

Now I was really confused.

"I'm not following you," I said, shaking my head. "What is my spark then, if it's not reading thoughts?"

"You know how Niall can suppress his essence? How he can make himself almost invisible to humans and vampires can't smell him?"

I nodded. "Yeah. Sam told me he'd never heard of that before."

"That's because it's a very rare talent, and it's manifested in a school of magic that has been almost exclusive to Niall's line. Of course, not everyone in his lineage has the talent, very few actually." Claudine looked sad for a moment, but then perked right back up. "But you do!"

"I do what?" I asked slowly, my eyes going wide.

"Your telepathy didn't come from your Fae blood, Sookie. But your ability to suppress the thoughts you hear did."

"My shields?" I asked, incredulous.

Claudine nodded. "Your telepathy is always a part of you. It can't be switched on and off like a light."

"Okay," I said slowly. I wasn't sure if my eyes could get any bigger, and I realized I hadn't blinked in a while.

"Cousin, what you call a shield is actually magic. You're able to create a magical barrier between yourself and the world. For now your ability is in a rudimentary stage; it only prevents you from hearing thoughts and you have to expend a lot of effort to keep it going. But as you work your way up, it will get easier to control. Plus, you can learn to manipulate the barrier so it can protect you physically. It's very similar to what Niall can do. You touched on the second level tonight, by accident, when the vampire was attacking you."

I just stared at my cousin for a solid minute, and my mouth fell open. I realized I had been sitting up more and more as the conversation had progressed, and I slumped back heavily, smacking my head against the headboard of the bed. It hurt my already aching head but also snapped me back to the moment.

Claude opened the door and walked back into the room just then, holding two glasses of juice. He sat one glass down on the nightstand near the bed, then leaned against the doorway to the bedroom and took a drink from the other. He and his sister exchanged a meaningful look, and I could have sworn they were having a silent conversation.

"You told her?" Claude asked, and his sister didn't look happy at having to answer.

"I had to. She was going to call Niall."

Claude rolled his eyes and Claudine shrugged and they both turned to me simultaneously. Neither one spoke and the silence became awkward.

"So, Claude," I said, just to say something. "I didn't get a chance to thank you for all this." I nodded to the medical equipment, the now empty blood bags, the juice he just brought. Claude didn't respond, just raised his brows as he took another sip of his drink. I had no idea where or why he had taken medical classes, but he no doubt failed bedside manner 101.

"So, what is Niall going to do?" I asked, looking at Claudine.

"He is going to kill the vampire that attacked you, of course," she answered, as if that were the most natural thing in the world and I was a bit slow for even asking.

"He's going to kill Victor? A vampire Sheriff? For me?" I wasn't a bit upset at the prospect of Victor Madden going to his final death, but I was very upset about the consequences it could entail.

"Sookie, you are one of us," Claudine said reasonably.

"No," I retorted. "I'm a human that is one-eighth fairy. Vamps won't allow one of their own - especially a big shot like Victor - to be killed over me."

Claude snorted and I looked at him sharply.

"You have something to say?" I asked him, probably more harshly than was warranted. But my cousin only smirked. On him, it looked sexy. But then again, most everything did. Or nothing. I tried to reach for the juice, and Claudine immediately jumped in to help. She handed it to me and I took a drink while Claude answered.

"One eighth fairy is worth more than one whole vampire, I don't care who he is. And once we find you a mate, your children will be worth even more."

I choked on the juice, starting coughing, and Claudine leaned over solicitously to pat me on the back. She gave her brother a 'I'm going to kill you later' look.

"You said you told her," he said defensively.

"I didn't get to that part yet," Claudine muttered.

"What part?" I asked brokenly, through coughs. "What's going on Claudine?"

She just looked at me like a deer in a headlight, and Claude, looking impatient, walked over and stared down at me. He put one hand on his hip and his dark eyes drilled right through me as he spoke.

"You're part Fae, you do understand that much at least?"

I tilted my head at my cousin and scowled but held silent. He seemed to take the hint and ratcheted down the sarcasm a little. Very little.

"The Fae have lost numbers rapidly during the past century. The most powerful of our kind are aging and will soon be lost. Niall's magic is vital to our survival, so we need to preserve his line. We need you to accept a mate of our blood so you can produce heirs." He stopped, looked down at his sister.

"Was that hard?" he asked her and I didn't know who looked more shocked, me or Claudine.

I closed my eyes, and after a moment of silence, I laughed. I knew the fairies were probably thinking I had hit my head a little too hard, but I just couldn't stop. The whole conversation, everything from Claudine's assessment of my magical abilities, to Claude's very direct explanation of Fae reproductive necessities, it all coalesced in my brain and somehow became the stuff of comedy. I felt tears run from my eyes and I didn't even care that it was killing my neck wounds and my arm to laugh so hard.

"What's so funny?" Claude finally demanded, after about two minutes.

I wiped my eyes, still laughing. "Nothing...it's just like...Hotshot with pointy ears!" And I laughed even harder.

"Hot what?"

"Forget it," I said, and made a supreme effort to regain my composure. This was the second time I had been valued for my potential breeding capabilites. It was flattering in a weird and very out-dated way, but also very creepy. Especially when I considered that my own Great-Grandfather had been in on the plan. I shook my head. I was surrounded by supernatural groups that wanted me dead, turned or pregnant.

Finally the last of my giggles died away and the full effects of my aches and pains resurfaced. I closed my eyes again and took a few deep breaths.

"Sookie," Claudine said very quietly. "This is why Niall didn't want you to know. He wanted to take things slow with you. He didn't want to scare you off." She gave a sharp look to Claude.

"_Are_ you scared?" Claude asked me directly.

"No, not scared. Confused. A little angry about Niall trying to manipulate me. And don't tell me that wasn't what he was doing, either. He wasn't trying to 'take things slow' for my sake, was he?" I didn't wait for an answer. "He was reeling me in a little at a time, gaining my trust so that when he finally dropped the big whammy I'd be more receptive. Does that about cover it, cousin?"

I was greatly pleased by Claude's reaction; he literally took a step back and he fell absolutely speechless. Claudine, however, looked terrified.

"Sook, please don't blame Niall. Please don't think ill of him. He's very powerful and he truly does love you. He would never, ever do anything that would bring harm to you, I promise. You're very valuable to him."

"Right," I snorted. "I'm good breeding stock."

"Not really," Claude said and I looked at him in amazement. He really was one of the biggest jerks I had ever met. He would be the perfect male if he could learn to just shut up and look good.

"You're still only one eighth fae," he explained bluntly. "No fairy would have accepted you unless you had some magical potential, even with Niall's bloodline in you. But since you've shown the spark, finding you a mate shouldn't be exceptionally difficult. Even with your sub-prime Fae streak, Niall will still be be able to make a suitable match for you."

"Well, I am so thrilled to hear that, Claude," I told him, and even a deaf person could have heard the sarcasm. I was close to telling both my cousins and my great-grandfather where to stick their expectations, but then an even better idea occurred to me.

"I'll tell you what," I said, looking between both the fairies. "I'll make Niall a deal. You tell him I will consider this plan of his," I hesitated when Claudine's scared face lit up with something akin to hope. "I will _consider_ _it_, " I repeated, this time emphasizing the last words. "But only if he promises not to do anything that will start a war."

I let my words hang there for a moment, and my cousin's shared some uneasy glances, and there was much shifting and hemming involved but finally they agreed to pass on my proposal to Niall.

"He won't be happy with me," Claudine said, and she looked truly worried. I felt bad for her, but I figured I deserved to know from the beginning what her motives were. I was angry right now, but the fae were my family, and I didn't want to see any of them harmed, especially over me. Claudine had saved my life, and had been a friend when I needed one, and even helped me connect with Eric.

Eric.

Thinking about him brought back a rush of emotions and fears I had all but forgotten during the highly informational chit-chat with my cousins. I glanced at Claude again.

"Can I talk to your sister alone for another minute please?"

He snickered, but left.

"So if this was the big plan all along, to hook me up with a fairy, why did you bother doing that little intervention with Eric?" I asked as soon as the door shut.

Claudine's big eyes looked at me and softened. "As your cousin, and as Niall's grand-daughter, I have to do what is best for our family, for our kind. But I'm still trying to be an angel, and as your guardian, I have to do what is best for you. Sometimes those two loyalties are very much in contrast. It makes things very difficult."

Claudine looked very sad just then, and she glanced down at her hands in her lap. "I'm expected to carry on our line too, you know. I'm expected to mate with a pure Fae, to produce Fae heirs. This is my obligation, and I accept it." She looked back up at me, smiled a little and I tried to smile back as her words broke through to me. "But we can't help who we fall in love with, can we?"

I looked at my cousin with round eyes, but a loud knock on the back door interrupted any further conversation.

Claudine stood up, and Claude yelled to us from the living room.

"It's the vampire Pam."

Claudine looked nervous and I chuckled. I felt a little nervous, too. Between the fairy smell and the blood smell, my bedroom might seem like a buffet to a vampire. And if Pam lost control, I had a feeling she was the kind of gal that would have dessert first.

"Maybe you and Claude should go," I said as the pounding on the door got louder. Claudine looked uncertain about leaving me and I waved a hand.

"I'll be fine with Pam," I assured her. "She is under oath to protect me; she won't hurt me. And I want you to find Niall and tell him what I said as soon as possible. You promised you would."

"Yes, I did. And I will." Claudine looked up as Claude entered the room. Pam was about to break the door down.

"We'll let her in and go," Claudine told me, and she leaned over to kiss my forehead. "I'll see you very soon."

"Bye," I said. "Thanks again." Then they were gone, and I heard the sound of the back door opening, and mumbled, brief words, then the door closed again and I heard footsteps coming up the hall.

Pam's eyes dilated as she looked at me. She focused on my hand first, that held the IV line. I cursed under my breath. I should have asked Claude to take that out before he left. I watched as Pam's gaze traveled over the bed, stopping at me face, at my arm in the splint and coming to rest on the pile of bloody and torn clothes on the floor. She sniffed the air and closed her eyes and she actually groaned a little. It was enough to make you sick, honestly.

"Snap out of it, Pam," I said, getting a little annoyed at how often I had to use that phrase around vamps. "Did you find out anything else about Eric?"

"Yes. His car has been destroyed," Pam stated. Was she was trying to lighten the mood?

"I'm serious, Pam," I said and I pushed myself up to a better sitting position. I nodded at the needle in my hand. "I don't suppose you can help me out here with this, can you?"

Without a word, Pam bent over me and skillfully and painlessly extracted the needle from my hand. She stared hungrily at the little pool of blood the appeared at the site of the wound, but she pulled herself together and went into the bathroom and returned with a damp washcloth. She placed in on the back of my hand and wiped away the blood.

"Thanks," I said.

"What happened, Sookie?"

I wrinkled my brow. "Claudine didn't tell you?"

"No," Pam hissed, and she sat down on the bed beside me. "The fairy answered Amelia's phone and told me you were in an accident." Pam looked me over again. "She failed to tell me the extent of your injuries."

I snickered. "Yeah, I really need to be in the hospital. Thanks for telling Claudine to bring me here." I leaned my head back and closed my eyes, wondering if I should tell Pam about Victor. But then my decision was made for me when Pam grabbed my cheeks and yanked my head to the side.

My eyes flew opened, and I was about to protest her roughness, but then Pam went completely still and her fangs descended. Oh no. She noticed the bite wounds Victor left on my neck.

"These are fresh," she said unemotionally.

I wasn't sure what to say, I still hadn't decided the best course of action here. Eric hadn't told Pam about Victor's plans for me and I was sure that was to protect her somehow. I didn't think it was my place to make that choice in his stead.

Pam misinterpreted my silence.

"My master isn't even gone for one night," Pam said slowly, squeezing my cheeks harder, and her voice shaking. "And you betray him by...."

When I realized what she was implying, I raised my arm and knocked her hand away with as much force as I could summon. She opened her mouth and bared her teeth at me and I slapped her right across the face. Hard.

Oh shit. Not my brightest move.

Pam jumped up at vampire speed and glared at me, growling. I was every bit as angry as she was, but in my broken and battered state I just didn't have the juice to be effectively scary. Pam didn't have that problem. I shivered and did the only thing I could think of to calm her down. I attacked her. Verbally this time, of course.

"How dare you!" I screamed at her, and had to take a moment to wince at the pain that came along with the words. I reached up and held my hand on my neck and kept it there as I continued.

"What the hell do you think happened? You think Amelia and I decided to go out fangbanging on the way home from Shreveport? Tell me, was that before or after we were ran off the damn road and almost killed?"

I came this close to mentioning Victor's attack, but I couldn't bring myself to say the words yet. I realized I was crying now, and it infuriated me even further. I hated it that I cried when I was angry, and I hated I was crying in front of Pam. More than that, it occurred to me that at that moment I just hated. Period.

But apparently I had gotten through to Pam. Her face was calm, concerned even, and her fangs were retracting as I watched. She walked over the few steps and stood beside the bed.

"Someone ran you off the road?" she asked and I nodded.

"Who?"

"Not sure. Humans. I heard their thoughts; I think they were with the Fellowship. They were definitely in a rage against vampires. Fanatics. We thought maybe we were targeted because we were in Eric's car."

Pam closed her eyes. "I never should have told you to take the corvette."

"Not your fault," I said, and I took my hand away from my neck. In my outburst I had broken open the wounds again and there was blood on my hand. Pam's nostrils flared.

"How did that happen, then?" she asked softly, eyeing the puncture marks. She bent over me and inhaled deeply. "I know this scent," she continued as she took another long whiff of me. Then her eyes flashed up to mine.

"Victor Madden," she hissed and out popped the fangs again. "He's here? He fed from you?" she demanded and I actually laughed.

"An understatement," I said and I nodded at the two empty bags of blood that Claude had dumped into me.

"He tried to kill you?" Pam asked incredulously and I shook my head a tiny fraction.

"Not...exactly," I said and I knew Pam understood when she slumped down to the bed beside me again.

"That son of a bitch," she said. "What is he thinking? You're under the King's protection. He knows you belong to Eric."

"He thinks Eric is dead," I said softly and damn it all to hell there went the tears again. Pam looked at me.

"He told you this?"

"Yes. He thought he would be viewed as some kind of hero, coming here to save me after Eric was killed. He found me right after the crash. He was going to kill Amelia, and turn me, and tell everyone he only did it to save my life."

The words just poured out of me and Pam was glaring at me and I was still sniffling like a child.

"Pam, please tell me the truth. Do you think Eric is still alive?" I begged her with my eyes to be honest.

She lowered her head. "Yes," she said. "I know he hasn't been killed. Can you feel him at all, through your blood tie?"

I shook my head. "No. It doesn't really work like that. I can only feel him when he's very close. The farthest I've ever been able to get a read on him was the night he was attacked by Siegbert. I was about mile or two away."

"But you don't feel any different, do you?" she pressed. "Like something is gone that was there before?"

I thought very hard, did an emotional and mental inventory and then shook my head.

"No. I feel the same as always."

"So Victor wants you for his child," Pam mused. "I assume he wants to use your telepathy." She turned to me. "He wouldn't have tried this if Eric were here. Victor is ambitious, but he's no fool. He wouldn't break our laws, even to get you. And before you try to tell me you're not important, I want you to know that you are very valuable."

Right, of course I was. I had been told that a lot tonight. Sookie Stackhouse was worth her weight in gold it seemed.

"You think Victor went after Eric, to get him out of the way?" I asked but Pam waved a hand.

"No. Victor Madden is formidable and very powerful, but he wouldn't be able to get the jump on Eric. Not when Eric was watching for him. And I assume all this body-guarding has been because Eric suspected Victor's plans for you?"

"Yes," I said and Pam huffed.

"I was afraid of this. This is exactly why I was worried for my maker getting involved with you. You've made him a target."

"Sam says the same thing about Eric," I murmured.

"Hmph. Your boss sounds quite intelligent, for a shifter." She half grinned, then became serious again. "Did Victor say anything else?"

"He said a lot of things." He_ thought_ a lot of things, too, but I decided to keep that to myself. Pam was looking at me expectantly, so I thought hard. I rubbed my throbbing arm as I spoke.

"He was very full of himself. When he said Eric had been killed, I asked him what he did. Victor said he didn't do anything, that he had no grudge against Eric, and had no claim on him. He said he respected Eric, and..."

"Are you sure that's what he said?" Pam interrupted me suddenly and her eyes flashed.

"Which part?"

"About the claim. Did he use those exact words. Sookie, try to remember. This is vital."

"Okay...uh, yes. He used those exact words. Why? What does that mean? Pam?"

The vampire was standing again and she crossed the room with her fists balled. She stared at the wall, immobile. She was saying something very softly, but I couldn't hear what.

"Pam!" I called, and started moving to get out of bed. But then she whirled around at vampire speed. I gasped.

"I was a fool, " she said but I wasn't sure she was talking to me. She was shaking her head and I thought I saw something red in her eyes. Was Pam crying? I put my hand to my chest as I felt it shattering. She caught my eyes, held them.

"A vampire is only said to have a _claim_ on another in very specific situations. The most common is the claim a maker has on his child."

I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to follow her despite the pain that was steadily increasing as the pain shot was wearing off. "Okay, so you think Victor was trying to tell me something?"

"Oh, no. I don't think he intended to tell you anything, but he did. It would explain a lot."

"Explain what? Pam!" I was almost yelling now in exasperation. If she knew something, she needed to tell me.

"I should never have left you tonight," she said. "I should have understood. I failed my maker. I should have known when he called me that way, when it was so strong and so brief, I should have known Eric would never do that to me." She paused and looked at me, and I gave her a look that clearly said I still didn't understand.

"Sookie, he wasn't calling me to him tonight. He never wanted me to leave you unprotected. He was trying to tell me something, send me a message using the only means he had."

And then the light bulb in my brain flashed on.

"He was trying to tell you what was happening to him," I breathed and Pam nodded solemnly. "You think...his maker has him?"

"It makes sense," she said. "I can't think of anyone else that could get to Eric in his own club."

"Oh my God, Pam, " I said, horrified as a memory surfaced in my head. "Last week when Eric came to visit me, Victor was here, outside."

"Victor followed Eric here?" she asked and I waved my hand to let her know that wasn't important.

"I asked Eric about his life, and he told me how he was turned. Victor was listening in, but we didn't know he was here until later. And now Eric is gone and Victor came after me."

"Madden made a deal to get Eric out of the way," Pam said and there went the fangs again. "I can only imagine what he promised Izo to get him to come to North America."

"Izo?"

"Eric's maker." Pam's voice was laced with barely contained loathing as she spoke the words.

"Eric told me his maker gave him to another vampire that eventually released him."

Pam looked at me suspiciously. "Eric told you all this?"

I nodded, and Pam's face softened, turned almost sad. She just looked at me for a long, long time.

"The agreement Izo made was more of a civil matter, one of tradition. It transferred his property - including Eric. It was much the same as an adoption, for lack of a better comparison. Legally, Eric's loyalty was transferred to the new vampire, but that didn't eliminate the blood connection between Eric and his maker. Izo can still claim Eric and force his obedience."

"Just like that?" I asked, incredulous. "Eric is a thousand years old! He's a Sheriff! This guy can just snap his fingers and..."

"Make Eric heel?" Pam finished for me. "Oh, yes. It's part of our existence, the price of our immortality. We are always under sway to our makers, and not all of us are as lucky as others." She paused, turned from me so I couldn't see her face. "Izo....is particularly barbaric. If he hasn't killed Eric, he must have another use in mind for him. I can't begin to imagine what that might be."

"We have to find him," I said, getting anxious. "We have to get Eric away from him!"

Pam bowed her head, turned to me slowly. "I can't interfere in this. No vampire can question this; it's one of our most closely held traditions. Makers can do what they wish with their children."

"Damn your traditions!" I yelled. "This is my fault, Pam. Eric was taken so Victor could get to me. I won't sit here and wait around for that monster to kill him! I can't..." My words choked off as another wave of pain ripped through my arm. I clenched my teeth, and fought it back.

Pam wasn't looking at me anymore; her eyes were on the floor. I was grateful since I was struggling to breathe and still crying with anger. I watched as Pam slowly bent down at the knees and squatted. I had no idea what she was doing until she held up one of my torn and bloody pieces of clothing that was still lying in a heap on the floor. She stood up slowly, and I recognized my underwear in her hand, and my now shredded black work pants. She looked at me sharply, then tossed the clothes to the floor and advanced on me.

"What..." I said, suddenly scared. But then she grabbed the edge of the blanket and tossed it back, along with the sheets. I gasped, startled, but before I could react Pam grabbed the end of my nightshirt and pulled it up.

"Hey!" I said, and I tried to push it back down. Too late. Pam was staring at the bruises on my legs, and there were a few on my thighs that were clearly in the shape of a handprint. Her eyes studied the patterns for a moment, then her eyes blazed up at me. I was totally unable to speak, I had no idea what she might be thinking.

"Lay on your left side, Sookie," she told me and I hesitated. But Pam's voice was soft, almost maternal and after a moment I complied with her instruction.

Then Pam did something very surprising. She stretched out on the bed right behind me, very close, kind of spooning with me. She stroked my hair with her hand.

"Pam, what are you doing?" I asked slowly, a little confounded at her behavior. I had never been in a bed like this with another woman, and even though I was pretty sure Pam wasn't trying to put the moves on me, it was still hard to relax.

And it got even more difficult when Pam took her hand away, and I heard a familiar crunch sound, and her bleeding wrist appeared in front of my face.

"Drink, Sookie," she said, very gently. "Hurry, before the wounds close."

"Pam, I can't," I protested. I was icked out on several levels, not the least of which was the fact this was such an intimate thing, something I now associated with Eric. Plus, I knew how vampires reacted when someone drank from them. I didn't think I was quite sophisticated enough to go there with Pam.

"Sookie, please," Pam insisted, moving her wrist closer to my mouth. "Please let me do this. If you won't do it for yourself, do it for Eric, and for me. I've already failed him. I owe it to him to heal you. He wouldn't want you to suffer."

And those words reached me when no others probably could. I closed my eyes and opened my mouth and used my hand to hold Pam's wrist in place. I drank from her, and I could feel myself getting stronger with every pull. Pam was very considerate and she kept very still, though I heard her make a few small sounds. When the wounds finally closed I released Pam's arm, but she didn't move away from me right away. She kept one arm around my waist and I felt her forehead touching my back.

"You taste like Eric," I whispered, and a tear slid down my cheek. Pam gave me a little squeeze.

"You love him," she said, and it wasn't a question. Of course, Pam would know more about me now that I'd taken her blood.

"I never told him," I said quietly and another tear escaped and ran down my face.

Pam was silent for many minutes and so was I. Then she jumped up from the bed without warning, and I rolled over and sat up, feeling very healthy and pain-free. I looked at the vampire curiously; she was suddenly very anxious and distracted.

"Dawn is coming," she explained, and she looked a little panicked.

"You're going to stay here, right?"

"Yes. I'll see you at sunset. Don't leave the house. Rest and regain your strength."

"I will," I said and I watched her head for the door. I stopped her.

"Pam. Thank you...for healing me."

"It was my pleasure," she answered and she gave me a knowing little smile I decided not to think about too closely. "I've never given my blood like that before, you know. Not to someone that wasn't a sexual partner, and never in quantity."

My eyes went wide and I wasn't sure how to respond. Pam laughed.

"My maker always warned me against it; warned me against sentimentality and forming an attachment to a human."

"So why did you do it then?"

Pam gave me a glowing smile. "Because my maker didn't listen to his own advice. And because I'm going to need you healthy so you can help me."

"Help you do what?"

"Help me find Eric and bring him home," Pam said and I felt a huge lump in my chest ease up immediately at the words.

"You're not worried about breaking your tradition" I asked, and I couldn't keep the smile off my face.

"I will take the risk, and the punishment if necessary."

Oh gack, that didn't sound good.

"Punishment? What can they do to you?" I asked, even though I really didn't want to know the answer. Vampires were nothing if not inventive.

Pam shrugged. "Silver, starvation, I might lose a limb or two."

I was horrified and I let her know.

"I owe this to Eric. I'll free him or die trying."

"Why?" I asked, amazed at her sudden change of heart.

Pam grinned wickedly.

"So he can have the pleasure of killing Victor Madden."

-

_To be continued_

_Sorry about the delay on this, next part will be up in the next few days. Thanks to all of you that are riding the adventure with me! xoxo_


	20. Chapter 20

Know Thyself

Chapter Twenty

I waited until the first rays of sunlight peeked through the curtains before I got out of bed. I knew I had promised Pam I would rest, and I intended to, but first I was going to take a nice, hot shower. I had dried blood and dirt all over, including my hair, and I felt downright nasty. But primarily I just wanted to scrub away every trace of Victor Madden.

I was still stiff and sore, but no longer in pain thanks to Pam's blood working its magic in my body. My right arm no longer felt broken, nor did my nose, but I was still a way off from being at one hundred percent health. I risked a glance in the bathroom mirror and saw the puncture marks on my neck were already healing, and a look at my arms and legs showed the bruises and scrapes were also well on their way to disappearing. It made me feel better, even if just a small amount.

The hot water felt wonderful and I washed my hair twice. I scrubbed up twice, too; once with regular soap and then again with my lilac body wash. I was still feeling pretty grimy on the inside, but by God I was going to at least smell good on the outside.

I changed into my most comfortable jeans and a sweatshirt and walked slowly through the house to the kitchen. I had something of a plan in mind to find Eric, but before I started I had to tie up some very important ends. First I called Sam but I got his answering machine. I left him a message about the accident, and told him I would have to be off work for a little while. I apologized, and hoped he understood.

I started some coffee brewing and pulled out the phone directory to look up the number for the hospital while I waited. A woman answered the switchboard and I asked her for Amelia Broadway's room. The phone only rang once before a familiar voice answered.

"Tray! Oh, I am so glad you're there! How is Amelia?"

There was a substantial pause. When he answered, he sounded very tired. "She's sleeping. She's been in and out. She has some broken ribs, and she broke her ankle. They had to stitch up a big cut in her head. They had to shave her hair some. She was pretty upset about that."

I closed my eyes. Yeah, that would upset any girl.

"She can probably go home later today," Tray continued. "I'm going to take her to my house since it's all one level. That would be better for her until she heals up some."

I breathed a sigh of relief. I was wondering how I was going to work this with Amelia. I had to help Eric, but I couldn't just leave my friend all alone and injured. Especially when it was my fault. Tray would take good care of her, though. He was a good guy.

"Okay, that's a really good idea. I can get her things packed up."

"Yeah, that sounds okay," he said. "We can swing by and pick it all up on the way to my place."

I agreed, and the rest of our conversation was very brief. I hung up the phone and headed upstairs to Amelia's room. I found her suitcase under the bed and I got her personal items bagged up from her bathroom first. I went to the closet and pulled out some of her favorite clothes, and also grabbed some that were not her favorites but that looked comfortable for a person on the mend. I knelt down and picked out some shoes for her, though with a broken ankle I didn't know if she would be wearing any.

As I stood up, I noticed a pile of books in the corner of the closet. I wondered if she would like a few to read, since she was probably going to be stuck indoors for a while. I pulled them out and realized immediately these books weren't for entertainment; they were more like textbooks, and they were heavy and well worn. I poked through the stack and found the titles were all very strange, all having to do with witchcraft and magic. I opened one out of curiosity and saw Amelia had written a lot of notes in the margins. There were also pages folded down and bookmarks scattered throughout. Amelia clearly took her witch studies very seriously, and I felt a peculiar swell of pride for my friend. I put all the books back as I found them and continued loading up the suitcase.

When I was done, I hauled the suitcase off the bed and was almost out the door before I had an impulse to check Amelia's computer. The screen saver was on, and multi-colored light patterns were bouncing around the screen. I touched the mouse and the Fellowship of the Sun website appeared immediately; Amelia had obviously left it up, and for that I was grateful since I wouldn't have a clue how to find it again on my own. It was still on the page with the photos of me and Eric and poor Bobby. I lingered on Eric's picture for a few minutes and my heart pounded in my chest. I didn't want to think about what might be happening to him.

"Just hold on, baby," I whispered and I reached out and touched Eric's picture with my fingertips. "We're going to find you."

Then I turned and went back downstairs, the big suitcase banging along behind me. I slid on my shoes and jacket and poured the coffee into my favorite oversized thermos. I grabbed my keys and headed out the door. I knew I was breaking another promise to Pam - not to leave the house - but there was no way I was going to be able to sit inside all day, and there was far too much on my mind to sleep. I walked quickly across my property and into the cemetery, making a bee line for Bill's house.

I kept going over the conversation I had with Eric about his maker over and over again. Pam said his name was Izo. Eric said he lived in Asia now; that he had found that information on Bill's database. So that was where I was going to start.

Bill had never asked for the key to his house back, and had even told me on more than one occasion I could come over any time I wanted to or needed to. I was silently thanking him for that as I slid the key into the front door of his old house. I walked inside and immediately felt a feeling of security and familiarity. I took off my coat and hung it on the rack by the door.

I maneuvered through the house until I found Bill's study, which was set up as his computer room now. My eyes went open wide when I flipped on the lights. I hadn't been in my ex-boyfriend's house in quite a while and I was surprised to see how much more computer equipment he had acquired since my last visit. His database must be doing exceptionally well. I wasn't big into computers but I had a general idea of what they cost and Bill had three expensive looking ones set up on tables and desks. There were little disks and files all over the place, and even though it looked confusing to me, I knew they were all neatly arranged and perfectly organized to fit Bill's needs.

I walked over to what looked to be the main computer desk and pulled up a chair. I flipped on the power and waited impatiently for the computer to start up. When everything finally loaded I was shocked to see that Bill had a picture of the Bon Temps cemetery as his background. It was a beautiful photo taken at nighttime, and it looked like it had been taken in the summer. I recognized the area immediately; it was in the middle of the cemetery and the camera angle was facing toward my house. I smiled briefly, but then got back to work.

I leaned forward and scanned the screen in front of me. There were dozens of little shortcuts and I felt a moment of unease. I was pretty sure what I was about to do was un ethical if not illegal. This was Bill's computer, and he was always very private about his work. And as a human, I wasn't even allowed to _attempt_ to purchase a copy of the database I was getting ready to investigate. I hesitated, and for an instant I heard Eric's words from Rhodes repeat in my head: _"You're second guessing yourself."_

Yeah, I was. I felt like I was getting ready to rummage through another woman's purse or a man's wallet.

Oh, screw it.

I clicked on a little symbol that I recognized and the vampire database popped up on the screen. I breathed a sigh of relief; it was easier to find than I thought! But my happiness was short lived when a password prompt started blinking in the middle of the screen.

Of course Bill would require a password for his super secret database. I should have known.

I lifted up the keyboard and peeked underneath, which was where I kept my passwords 'hidden' at home. Nothing there, of course. I started typing in familiar words; _Bon Temps, vampire, database, compton_ and everything else I could think of that Bill might use as a password. Nothing worked. I sat back in the chair, frustrated. I flipped through a few note pads that were on the desk, hoping to find a clue. When that didn't pan out I began opening drawers, but found only pens and pencils and other typical office type fare and....

My hairbrush. The one I kept at Bills when he and I were together; the one he used to brush my hair for me so many times. I picked it up, saw a few blonde hairs still twisted into the bristles. I had always kept this upstairs when I stayed here, certainly not here in the study. My heart softened with a profound sadness as I placed the brush quietly back in the drawer. An impulse struck me, and I stared at the computer screen again. I held my breath as I typed in one final word: _Sookie_.

And in an instant I was inside the vampire database. I smiled and let go with a little victory yelp.

"Thank you, Bill," I said quietly as I started getting myself familiar with how the program worked. It turned out to be extremely 'user friendly' - as it would have to be since most vampires are old and not exactly schooled in new technology. There was a place up top where you could perform a search by name, so I took a shot and typed in Izo. (as I assumed it was spelled) Little red blood droplets (nice touch, Bill!) starting running down the screen along with the word 'Searching'. I waited with bated breath and a hopeful heart. I wasn't really expecting to get lucky - it had been my experience that vamps change their names many times during their long lives. Izo could very well be wandering around Asia right now calling himself Giovanni or Mac.

But then a new page appeared entitled 'Search Results'. Three names were listed; Izora, Izolde and finally, Izo. My finger was shaking as I reached over to click on the final name. There was an excruciatingly long wait as the page loaded, but then it did and I found myself staring at Eric's maker. There was the vampire that had attacked Eric in his sleep, drained him, buried him and then left him to rise alone. The vampire that may have been hired by Victor Madden to kill Eric and who might at this very moment be holding Eric against his will.

I expected Izo to look like a monster. I expected him to look like a sadistic, evil figure of terror. But the face on the screen, in an old, grainy, black and white photo, looked anything but a nightmare. Izo was definitely Asian, but I wasn't familiar enough with facial features to guess his country of origin. He had a round face, maybe not handsome but certainly not ugly or plain. His hair was dark but I couldn't guess on the length; it appeared to be tied back. He had high eyebrows and just a hint of a very thin mustache. If anything, I decided Izo was almost pretty. I squinted and moved closer to the screen, trying to memorize everything about this vampire. A vampire that I had never met, but one I hated with a fury.

To the left of the photo were some (minimal) personal details: his age (approximated at 1370) present location (Japan) name of his sire and some other tidbits. It was all interesting, but overall useless information for my purposes. A home address would have been helpful.

I sat back and took a sip of my coffee while my mind went into over-drive. It was overwhelming to think about the task in front of me. Eric could be, literally, anywhere on the planet right now. If Izo had a private plane he could already be out of the country. I was trying very hard not to panic, but it was difficult. I hoped Pam had some ideas. Surely she would know more about Eric's maker, right? Maybe she had a plan in mind to find him. I checked the clock and was disappointed to see it was still mid-morning. Pam wouldn't be awake for a good while.

I pushed back from the desk and stood up. I wandered around the room, picking up a few of the disks and papers, wondering what they might be. Bill had certainly been keeping busy. There were forms that looked like contracts atop a particularly large leather bound folder, and the disks sitting beside them were labeled Mississippi and Indiana. I started to read the documents, but then decided I had crossed the line between curiosity and snooping, and I moved on.

There was a leather sofa in this room, and a few magazines on a small end table. I plopped down and thumbed through the magazine idly, not really reading, just trying to occupy my mind. Maybe if I just relaxed, an idea would come to me? As I sank back into the sofa I found I was very tired all of a sudden. Not surprising, of course, since I hadn't slept all night. I didn't count passing out from blood loss and pain as 'sleep.' I leaned my head back against the soft cushions and closed my eyes, not planning to fall asleep, but that was exactly what I did.

When I woke, I was lying curled up on my side with my head on a pillow and a warm blanket was covering me. My shoes were off. I stirred a little, and heard voices in whispers. I sat up slowly, blinking, and saw Pam and - to my astonishment - Bill, hunkered down over one of the computers in the room. They both looked up at me in unison as I pushed off the blanket and stood. I did an inventory of my body and was relieved to find that the residual soreness and stiffness seemed to be gone.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"Just past nine," Bill answered and I felt a moment of panic. I had been asleep for over ten hours!

"I told you not to leave the house," Pam said, but she didn't really sound angry. Or surprised, I noted.

"You found me," I mumbled, embarrassed. I looked at Bill curiously. He wasn't anything like his usual tidy self; his clothes were wrinkled and he was covered in dirt.

"When did you get back?" I asked him.

He leaned back in the chair. "Just after sundown. The King gave me permission to return after he heard about Fangtasia. I didn't quite make it back before dawn, so I had to go underground for the day just outside of Shreveport."

Ah, that explained his appearance. I walked over and looked at the computer screen and sucked in a sharp breath. The Fellowship of the Sun's hit-list webpage was pulled up, the one with my photo. But it was different than it had been this morning. Now there was a giant red X over the photos of Eric and Bobby and a yellow X stamped right across mine. Word moves fast in the world of fanatics, it seemed. I felt my knees start to give way and Bill was on his feet in a flash to catch me. He sat me down in the chair he had just vacated. I couldn't tear my eyes from the screen.

"Pam," I said softly, and I forced myself to look up at her. She met my gaze evenly, and gave me a reassuring smile. I knew she was trying to tell me not to worry. As if I couldn't.

"If this Izo has indeed taken Eric, we'll have to move quickly," Bill said. I guess Pam had filled him in on the situation. Bill walked over and sat down at another computer in the room and punched a few buttons. Pam followed him.

"Bill thinks he might know where Izo is heading," Pam said, and her voice was uncharacteristically approving. I stood up, feeling hope swell inside me.

"How?" I asked. "Bill?"

My ex was still engrossed in the computer in front of him, and the light from the screen bathed his face in eerie shadows. He was clicking and punching buttons rapidly and he didn't stop while he answered.

"We may have gotten lucky. I've been working on a new program for Mississippi that is proving helpful."

"Right," I said. "Russell said something about that when he was in Merlotte's last week."

"You remember that debacle with Charles Twinning?" Bill asked. He turned to look at me and I nodded. Pam clearly remembered, too; she raised her eyes and shook her head in disgust. Charles weaseled his way into Eric's employment as a means to get close to me so he could kill me. Charles told everyone he was from Mississippi, which was a lie of enormous proportions. Eric eventually figured it out, but it was almost too late.

"Eric called Russell before he hired Charles, to check his story" Bill continued, and I thought I saw a very brief, very small smile touch his lips. "But Russell had too many boy-toys in and out of his area all the time, and he never bothered to keep track of them. Charles knew this and used it to his advantage. Eric made sure Russell knew about that."

"Okay, so what does that have to do with finding Izo?" I knew I sounded impatient, and I was. I was ready to skip the history lesson and get a move on.

"Russell was furious that he was used. He was embarrassed that a Sheriff in another kingdom had pointed out his shortcomings in security. He decided he would not let something like that happen again, and he approached me about instituting a tracking program that keeps a record of every vampire that enters or exits his kingdom."

"How does he manage that?" I asked. Bill didn't answer, neither did Pam. More secret vampire stuff, I assumed. I let it go.

Bill nodded to the stack of disks on the desk in front of him.

"I installed the program several weeks ago so he could try it. It's worked very well, and the night you saw him at Merlotte's we were negotiating terms for getting a similar program set up for Indiana."

"Right, Russell is married to Indiana, I get it." I waved my hand in a 'hurry up and get to the point' gesture. Bill leaned forward and put his elbows on his knees and smiled.

"As part of our contract, I keep a working copy of the program here, so I can perform necessary maintenance and updates without having to travel." Bill pointed to the screen. "Izo entered Mississippi two nights ago, and exited last night. He hasn't gone back. Yet."

I gasped and looked at Pam, who was smiling in a fangy way. Clearly she and Bill had already discussed details while I was napping.

"So where is he now?" I asked, getting excited.

Bill sat back, regarded me for a long moment with an unreadable expression. "I can't be sure, but it makes sense that Izo would more than likely attempt to leave the country the same way he came in."

"So he will be going back through Mississippi?"

"We think so, yes," Pam answered. "He's probably going to stay in safe houses until he can find a way to get Eric out of the country."

"Safe houses?" I questioned.

Pam shrugged. "Before the Great Revelation it was hard for us to travel safely. There were safe houses - secret and secure buildings - where vampires could rest during the daylight hours."

"Like an underground railroad," Bill interjected.

Pam continued her explanation and I hung on every word. "Most safe houses aren't in use anymore. They aren't necessary now that there are vampire hotels and airlines we can use. But Izo wouldn't risk using anything public, not if he's traveling with an unwilling vampire, especially one he was supposed to have killed. Izo can make Eric obey him, but I can guarantee Eric is not going quietly."

"Do you know where these safe places are located?" I asked.

Bill nodded, and stood up. He walked over to his printer and pulled off a piece of paper. He handed it to me. I scanned it, but didn't really understand what I was reading.

"That is a list of coordinates for safe houses in the surrounding kingdoms. There are none left here in Louisiana at all; the last one we had was destroyed during Katrina. Mississippi has the closest ones, which is why we think Izo chose that state in which to travel. He's trying to stay off the radar, but he didn't know about Russell's tracking program."

"You should get a program like that for Louisina," I said absently, lost in thought. Bill smiled.

"We're working on that," he said, then he turned serious. "Sookie, there is no guarantee Izo is at any of these locations. If he has an accomplice he could be staying at a private residence. But I believe checking the safe houses is our best bet. Time is critical here. If Izo gets Eric out of the country, he'll be lost. We should leave immediately, tonight."

"_We?_" I asked and Bill regarded me with the dark gaze that always roused my emotions.

"Eric is my Sheriff. I owe him my loyalty. And I haven't forgotten that Eric came for me when I was in a similar circumstance." Bill paused and smiled a fraction. "I realize, of course, that Eric was protecting his own interests by coming for me, but even so..." Bill seemed to focus on something far away for a moment, then his eyes locked on mine once more. "He does not deserve the fate his maker would demand of him."

At that moment I could have leapt into Bill's arms and kissed him. Two vampires on the rescue team were better than one! A wave of excitement rushed over me. I felt like I could run all the way to Mississippi. I took a breath and reminded myself I had a big dose of vampire blood in me, and not to get crazy. But it was hard, so hard. I wanted to find Eric, and I wanted to kick the shit out of Izo, and right then I felt like I could almost do it single-handed.

"I'll need to take a quick shower and change," Bill said and he was already heading out of the room. "I won't be long."

Pam and I were left alone. She looked distracted, not a normal expression for her.

"We need to pack some supplies," she said and walked swiftly toward the kitchen. I followed behind.

Once in the kitchen, Pam opened up the refrigerator and grabbed out several cases of True Blood. She asked me if I knew where Bill might keep a cooler, I nodded and went to grab it from the storage room. When I returned, we loaded up the bottles of blood silently. I stole a few glances at the vampire, but she never met my eyes.

After we put the lid on the big cooler, Pam looked around, and headed toward the storage room. I heard a few snapping sounds and when Pam returned, she was carrying two pieces of wood about three feet long, one in each hand. She laid them on the kitchen table without a word. I stared at the makeshift stakes, and suddenly the reality of what we were about to do hit me with the force of a tidal wave. I felt a wave of nausea, and fear. When I was finally able to tear my eyes away from the weapons, I saw Pam was looking at me intently.

"You don't have to go," she stated without emotion.

I didn't even hesitate. "Yes, I do."

Pam continued to stare at me, and I shifted uneasily. She finally chuckled and shook her head.

"You really would make a decent vampire, Sookie."

"Pam," I started to say in a warning voice, but she held up a hand.

"I know, I know. But if you ever change your mind..."

"You'll be the first person I call," I told her, and my tone let her know she would be waiting a very long time for that particular call.

"With your talent, you'll always be a target for those that want to use you," she said in a matter-of-fact way. "You might be able to escape Victor, but there will always be another one just like him."

I looked at her sharply. "I don't want to be a vampire," I said emphatically. "I'm human. I like my life."

She shrugged. "What good is a human life if you have to spend it running and looking over your shoulder? You could choose to have a good master, one that would treat you well."

I stared at Pam with an astounded expression. I had no idea if the 'good master' she referred to was her, or Eric, or just a generalization. Not that it really mattered, since the entire matter was off the table as far as I was concerned.

Any further conversation was cut short when Bill joined us. He was clean and showered and wearing khaki slacks and a very familiar shirt. (I remembered the day I bought it for him) He had a small black duffel bag over his shoulder and he grabbed up the stakes without batting an eye. He held them both in one hand, and with the other he picked up the cooler by the strap.

"I'll get these loaded in the car. Sookie, you'll have to go home and get a change of clothes and whatever else you need. We might be gone for several nights."

Just then Pam's cell phone rang and she whipped it out in a blur of a motion and looked at the number. She exchanged a cryptic look with Bill, and he nodded at her.

"I'll take you home to get your things," he told me as Pam walked out of the room, talking softly into the phone. I followed him to his car, watched as he loaded up the trunk with the equipment, and he opened the passenger door for me.

"I'll be right back," he told me as he shut the door. I watched as he returned to the house at vampire speed. When he came back out, he was carrying a laptop computer and a small bag. He loaded the items in the backseat and then got behind the wheel. In a few minutes we were at my house.

Bill followed closely behind me as I unlocked the door and stepped inside. I noticed the suitcase I had packed for Amelia was gone, so I knew she was safe at Tray's. I headed back to my bedroom and started gathering my things while Bill stood protectively in the doorway, watching my every move. I shoved a change of clothes into a big bag with a long strap, and headed into the bathroom to load up my personal items. I took a few minutes to brush my teeth and wash my face and when I emerged Bill was sitting on the edge of my bed, staring at the floor. I followed his gaze and cringed. I never picked up my bloody and shredded clothes from the night before. Great.

I sighed heavily and slung the bag around my shoulder, then leaned over and piled the clothes into my arms. Just touching them made my stomach churn with anger. I marched out of the bedroom and down the hall to the back door, feeling more and more outraged with every step. I walked outside and tossed the destroyed clothes into one of my big metal trash cans then I slammed the lid, hard. When I turned back around, Bill was right behind me. I jumped and sucked in a breath.

"Pam told me about Victor," he said, and I felt heat rise in my cheeks. It pissed me off even further that I felt embarrassed about what had happened.

"Yeah, well, he didn't get to finish what he started," I mumbled. I didn't want to talk about this, especially not with Bill, of all people. I went to move around him and he caught me by the waist. His dark eyes searched my face.

"Are you alright?"

I barked out a laugh, and looked Bill directly in the eyes.

"Oh sure, I'm fine with coming this close to waking up with Victor Madden as my master." Sarcasm for the win!

Bill's face softened, and he moved closer. "Are you alright?" he asked again.

Something in the way he asked struck a chord, and I felt like I was might break down in tears. Instead I let fury take me.

"Bill," I said slowly, "in the past few years I have been beaten, shot, staked, attacked by a pig, poisoned and in more car accidents that I want to remember. If I was going to curl up in a corner and feel sorry for myself I would have done it a long time ago." I warned him with my tone to drop it. He didn't.

"Sookie..." he started to say and I just lost it.

"Just forget it," I snapped "It's not like I haven't been almost drained and raped before, right?"

And I regretted the words as soon as I said them. Bill's cheek twitched, and after a moment he dropped his arm and bowed his head. I pushed by him and stomped toward the car. But I couldn't hang onto my anger anymore when I turned back around. Bill hadn't moved an inch and he looked, well, he looked as defeated as I'd ever seen him. Shit.

"I'm sorry," I said, and I meant it. "I don't know why I said that."

"You said it because it's true," Bill replied, still looking at the ground. Then he raised his head and gazed at me with pain-filled eyes. "I nearly killed you. I did...rape you. We never talked about it."

"There's nothing to talk about," I said, feeling the last of my rage slowly leaking away and impatience taking it's place. We had more important things to do than stand here in the cold and rehash our troubled history. Bill already apologized, and I forgave him for the whole mess. End of story. I wanted to get on the road and find Eric. I started to open the car door but Bill moved at vampire speed to intercept me.

"Bill, we need to go," I protested.

"We will. But we need to talk about this, Sookie. Please. I can't bear to think that you put me in the same category as...Victor Madden."

I reached up and rubbed a hand over my eyes. If having this very uncomfortable conversation would get Bill moving, I'd discuss it with him. Briefly.

"Bill," I said, and I was certain I sounded like a person forcing patience. "I don't think you're like Victor. I'm sorry I implied it. You had been starved and tortured and you were out of your mind. Victor was cold and calculating and in full control of his actions. You acted out of instinct, Victor acted out of cruelty. I know the difference, okay?"

"No," Bill said softly. "It's not okay at all. What I did to you was unforgivable. I never apologized for it, not specifically, because I was so ashamed. I was furious at myself for hurting you that way."

I released a long breath. "You couldn't help yourself."

Bill studied my face. "No, I couldn't. I am vampire. But when I realized what I'd done, that I had brutalized _you_, my darling Sookie...it was the first time I truly hated myself and what I was."

I didn't know what to say to that. I believed Bill. I had never for a moment thought he had hurt me intentionally. I had tried to push the incident away, rationalize it and excuse it. But standing there with him, I finally understood that what happened that night had affected me profoundly in ways I hadn't considered.

"I think," I said slowly, "that the worst part was seeing you so out of control. Until that night, I had always tried to see the man in you, instead of the vampire. But when you turned on me like that, it was impossible to ignore what you really were. It reminded me how different we really are."

Bill's dark gaze didn't waver. "I told you once that all vampires are very violent."

"I remember," I said softly.

"I'm not using that as an excuse, I'm just reminding you. And Sookie, if we find Izo..."

"_When_ we find Izo," I countered.

Bill paused, then nodded. "When we find him, you have to be prepared for what might happen. He's very immersed in the old ways, even now. He was part of the group that vehemently objected to vampires coming out into the open. He won't hesitate to kill, or worse. I'm not at all comfortable with you being anywhere near him."

"I'm going," I stated and I put as much strength behind the words as I could summon.

"I know," Bill said with a small smile. "I know you would go on your own if you had to. Promise me you will stick close to me, and Pam. Promise me you won't try to do anything foolhardy."

I actually smiled a little. Always the protective one, that was Bill.

"I promise."

Bill looked up then, obviously hearing something I couldn't. I squinted into the darkness and saw Pam emerging from the shadows. She still had her cell phone on her ear. Bill looked back down at me.

"It's time. Let's go get Eric," he said.

I couldn't agree more.

_To be continued_

_- Life drama got in the way this week, so this was terribly delayed. Plus, transition chapters are hard for me. I'm an action girl! Hope it wasn't too tedious. Thanks to my lovely Beta and everyone keeping up with the story! You all are awesome! xoxo_


	21. Chapter 21

Know Thyself

Chapter Twenty One

Pam walked over to us, scowling, listening to someone speak on the other end of the phone. I heard her say 'yes' and 'I understand' but beyond that my human hearing couldn't decipher anything more. I watched with some surprise as Bill silently handed his keys to Pam and took up position in the back seat so I could ride up front. We loaded into the car swiftly and Pam slapped her cell phone shut in a smooth one handed movement. She started the engine and before long we were out of Bon Temps and heading toward the Mississippi border.

Bill plugged in his laptop and was tapping away on the keys. He spread a map of Mississippi out on the seat beside him and he was making little marks at various locations. Pam was silent and focused, but not really stressed. I was simply trying to breathe and keep my anxiety at a minimum. I was fidgeting restlessly and Pam flipped on the radio; I assumed it was an attempt at toning down the tense atmosphere in the car. It didn't really work, at least not for me, but I appreciated the gesture. It was a local country station, at least. That helped.

I stared out the window and stared unseeing at the passing scenery and silently sang along to a song I knew. The whole situation really smacked of Deja Vu, and not in a good way. Here I was, heading off on a rescue mission to save yet another vampire lover from the clutches of his maker. I turned my head and looked at Bill, saw his face bathed in the blue tinged light from the laptop screen. I hoped Eric's outcome was as good as Bill's. I hoped Eric wasn't being tortured. I hoped I didn't end up staked.

"Forty Eight hours," Bill said unexpectedly, looking up and meeting my eyes.

"Excellent," Pam said, and she sounded pleased.

I had no clue what they were talking about. Bill must have noticed my confusion because he hurried to explain.

"I've been doing some research. Izo won't risk leaving the country on a commercial flight. He'll certainly book passage with Anubis. The airline requires forty eight hours notice for all international flights."

"So," I said. "If Izo called yesterday, the soonest he will be able to leave would be tomorrow night, right?"

"Yes. And it may be even longer. A lot of it depends on what the destination country requires in terms of paperwork. Traveling to Japan isn't like flying state to state. Vampires need passports, too. Anubis has a sister company that deals with that sort of thing, but it still takes time."

I tried to get a mental image of an ancient vampire standing in line at the Post Office for a passport photo. I wondered if Izo smiled with his fangs out.

"I've marked the Anubis pick-up locations in Mississippi," Bill continued in his calm voice. I twisted around more fully in the seat and peered at the map beside him. "I've also marked the safe house locations." Bill pointed to an area he had circled on the map in the Northern part of Mississippi. "This one is closest."

"You think Eric is there?" I asked.

Bill looked at me silently for a long moment. "I don't know. That list of coordinates is several years old. Some of those safe houses may no longer be viable. Or Izo could have traveled through another state entirely. I'm just trying to narrow down the possibilities as best I can."

"Can I see that map?" I asked and Bill folded it in half and handed it to me through the seats.

I flipped on the dome light in the car and looked at the marks Bill had made. I started to touch the area Bill had circled, hoping he was right. Eric could be so close. Just before I touched the spot on the map, I stopped cold. My finger hovered over the area, but I couldn't move it another millimeter. I wrinkled my brow and concentrated, tried to touch it again but got the same result. It was like my finger and the map were opposite poles on a magnet. I had felt that sensation before. I pulled my hand into a fist and raised it to my heart.

"What's wrong, Sookie?" Pam asked, glancing at me quickly.

"Nothing," I whispered. I lied. I recalled the week before when I had tried to call Niall and my fingers simply wouldn't let me push the buttons on the phone. I had chalked that incident up to stress and hadn't thought any more about it. (In hindsight, I was glad I hadn't called Niall that night.) But now it had happened again. Was my sub-conscious trying to tell me something? Or maybe I was just crazy.

I felt a cool hand on my shoulder. Bill was leaning forward and when I turned my head he was very close. His dark eyes were full of concern. I turned back quickly, and cleared my throat.

"So, if we don't find him there, where will we try next?" I tried to keep my voice light.

"We try the next closest safe house, and then the next," Bill answered, but he was still looking at me with worry. I refolded the map and passed it back to Bill.

"Thanks," I told him, looking him in the eye and trying to smile. "For doing all this. You've gotten really good with computers." Most vampires weren't very skilled in modern technology. They either ignored it, or hired a minion to deal with it. It spoke volumes that Bill had taught himself and excelled in such an area. It probably appealed to his deliberate and organized nature.

Bill sat back in the seat, turned his eyes back to the laptop. "I've found I enjoy it," he replied, confirming my suspicion.

"And it looks like you're staying busy," I said, turning back around to stare out the window. Bill's computer database and the ensuing troubles that resulted from it was the beginning of the end for us. I recalled a time when I couldn't even look at a computer without remembering and feeling bitter. Now I was happy for Bill's success, and proud, in a strange way.

"It's become very time consuming, though," Bill said, and I heard a slight edge in his voice.

"It will only get worse," I replied. "When word gets out about the tracking program and how well it works, every kingdom will want one."

"I'm sure they will," Bill said softly.

"You should make someone help you," Pam piped in. "We have stacks of resumes at Fangtasia. We get them all the time. If they didn't get destroyed in the explosion, I can let you look through them."

"I don't think I'm quite ready for that," Bill said coolly.

I turned back to look at him. "Why not?" I asked. "That's a great idea. You're making plenty of money, you can afford to hire someone."

Dead silence ensued.

"What?" I asked, and noticed Pam was trying very hard not to laugh.

"She isn't talking about hiring someone, Sookie," Bill said. "She is talking about making one. A child."

My mouth dropped open and I looked at Pam. "But you said you had stacks of resumes!" I exclaimed, and then Pam did laugh. I felt my eyes pop. "You mean people actually _apply _to become a vampire? Are you serious?"

Pam shrugged. "Yes. There are humans that offer everything they have for immortality. Most are pathetic creatures, quite useless. The new trend now is for humans to send out formal requests for consideration. Some send resumes, and we also get videos. It's quite amusing. You would be surprised at what some people list in their skills section."

I didn't even want to think about one.

I tried to wrap my mind around this concept. "Okay, so if you decide you need another vampire at Fangtasia, you would just go through the stack of potential applicants, pick one and call him in to be drained?" This was morbid, but strangely enlightening.

Pam snorted. "Hardly. Vampires are very selective when choosing a child." She made a face. "For the most part, anyway. There are some vampires out there I've met, and I can't begin to imagine what their makers were thinking. Anyway, we keep the requests mostly for amusement. Eric gets several every week. He has quite a reputation."

"I'm sure he does," I said under my breath, feeling a surge of jealousy. The thought of humans clamoring on Eric, begging to be turned, was revolting. I turned to look at Bill.

"Are you really considering doing that?" I asked him.

"Not at the moment, but it's not out of the question, if I find the right person."

I stared at Bill, not quite believing what I was hearing. I must have looked a little shocked because his face clamped down in an expression I knew very well. I turned back around.

"Immortality is a great gift," Pam said, peeking at me from the corner of her eye. "Your stoic aversion to the idea is a little confusing."

"Well, vampires thinking they are superior to humans is a little confusing to me," I retorted, a little more strongly than I intended. "And I'm not having this conversation again."

"We're stronger," Pam stated in a reasonable tone. "We live longer so we have more knowledge. We have learned to think far into the future. Humans are always wasting energy on petty issues in the moment."

I huffed out a laugh. I couldn't believe she was going to press the issue. Sweet Jesus, she was as stubborn as Eric! I really had no desire to have this debate with Pam, but I knew she was not going to let it go. I had actually given a lot of thought to vampires, and to people who wanted to be vampires. I didn't dwell on it, and I was far from being an expert on the subject, but as much as I was around them, I would have to seriously have my head in the sand to never think about what their lives meant in the grand scheme of the universe.

"Do you know vampires don't leave ghosts behind when they die?" I asked her, and I was tickled to no end that Pam actually looked taken aback for a moment. "Amelia told me you had to be a human to leave a ghost."

"Yes," Pam said slowly. "I know that."

"Okay, so a ghost is like a soul that hasn't moved on, right? So that must mean there is something after this life for me. For humans. Sure, I won't get to hang around here as long as you will, but maybe when I die I get to go somewhere else. And maybe when I get there, I will actually live longer than you. Maybe when it's all said and done, I'll be the real immortal one."

Pam smiled hugely at me. "Maybe so. Who is to know? Some of our kind think as you do. They believe we lost our souls when we were turned."

"I'm not sure about that," I said softly. "You didn't have a choice. Maybe when Eric killed you - and yes, I still believe he killed you, Pam. Oh, and by the way, thanks for telling him I said that!"

Pam laughed again and I quickly got back on point.

"So maybe when he killed you, when you died, your soul went to wherever it was supposed to go. Maybe it's just floating out there, waiting on you to come back. You won't live forever. Even if you survive until the earth explodes, you will eventually, finally die."

Pam smiled at me again. "Anything is possible."

I was sure I wasn't telling her anything she didn't already know or hadn't considered, but I was pretty sure she wasn't going to bring up the becoming a vampire discussion again. Not for a while, anyway.

I noticed that Bill had remained very quiet during the whole exchange, but I had no doubt he had been soaking up every word.

We drove in silence after that for a good long while. We lost the local station early on, and Pam flipped off the radio when it started to get staticy. The only sound in the car was Bill's fingers typing on the laptop from time to time. When Pam's cell phone rang, it seemed extremely loud. I noticed she looked in the rearview mirror and caught Bill's eye before she answered it.

"Pam," she said, and there was a long pause.

"He's lying," Pam growled into the phone a minute later. Bill had leaned forward, and I was sure he could hear everything on the other end of the line. I wished I could.

"I won't do that," Pam said. "Not until I speak to Eric."

Another pause.

"I will deal with that when and if the time comes," she said and then she flipped her phone shut.

I waited until I was absolutely certain no one was planning to tell me what was going on before I spoke.

"What was that about?"

Pam and Bill did that cryptic stare thing again. I turned my body to face Pam as much as I could.

"If this is about Eric, I want to know!" I said.

Pam glanced at me. "It's not about Eric. It's about you."

"What?" I demanded. And this time it was Bill that answered.

"Victor went to the King. When he failed in his attempt to turn you, he panicked. You're under the King's protection, so he violated an official edict by attacking you. He decided to undermine your credibility. He told the King lies, and Felipe' has sent word that you are to be brought to him immediately for questioning."

"What?" I nearly screamed. "'I'm not one of his subjects! He can't order me around!"

"Yes, he can," Pam and Bill said at the same time, and I leaned back heavily in the seat, a little defeated.

"What did he tell the King?" I asked, but I had a terrible feeling I already knew the answer.

"He told Felipe' that you can read vampire minds, and Eric had been keeping that fact a secret to further his own ambitions."

Oh hell. It was just as bad as I thought. Maybe worse. I couldn't think of a thing to say.

"Don't worry, Sookie," Pam said. "We know Victor is lying. We'll find Eric, and he'll be able to convince the King of the truth."

Right, I thought. The only problem is that Victor _was_ telling the truth. It would be my word against his, and I doubted the King would take my word over that of his lieutenant. And now Eric was brought in, too. We might save him from Izo just to have him staked when he got home.

I tossed ideas around in my head for the next few hours. It was just too much to consider. I pushed aside everything except thoughts of Eric. I pictured his face, tried to visualize him safe and healthy and in my arms.

"Take the next exit," Bill said suddenly, and I sat up a little straighter. Pam did as he instructed and we soon found ourselves in an industrial type of area. The street was old, and hadn't been maintained for some time. We bounced over and around pot holes and gravel until the pavement ended and a dirt road began. There was absolutely nothing around us, no cars, no houses, no lights. Pam slowed.

"Keep going," Bill said, and when I glanced back at him he was looking closely at the map. "Two more miles on the dirt road, and then we need to take a left."

I held my breath. We were getting close. I closed my eyes and tried to feel Eric. I looked over at Pam, and I got the impression she was doing the same thing. I wondered about her own bond with her maker, how it worked, if she could feel him when he was close, too.

Pam took the left as Bill instructed and we drove very slowly on a strip of land that could only be called a road in the loosest sense of the word. The headlights caught a flash of light in the distance, and Pam stopped the car, turned off the lights and engine. She looked at me.

"Stay here, we'll be back."

I didn't have a chance to argue. She hopped out of the car with Bill on her heels. The two vampires moved silently into the darkness. I watched them disappear and clenched and unclenched my hands over and over. My breathing sounded very loud to my ears. Minutes passed. I had no idea what was happening. My mind was conjuring up all sorts of horrible images and I was just about to ignore Pam's instruction when I heard the back car door open. I yelped in surprise. I hadn't seen or heard Bill come back. Pam was back in the driver's seat a moment later.

"Deserted," she said. "No traces of vampire smell at all."

I exhaled and felt my heart sink. Bill put a hand on my shoulder and squeezed.

"This isn't the only place," he said gently. "We still have time before dawn."

I nodded, and watched as Bill took out the map. Pam got us back on the highway quickly and Bill was playing navigator in the back seat.

"Which one are we going to try next?" I asked, leaning over the seat to get a better look at the map.

"This one is closest," Bill answered, pointing to a spot he'd marked in red, then he pointed to a road. "We're here."

I reached over to trace the road and as I approached the spot of the safe house my finger froze. It was happening again, the weird sensation from earlier.

"What is going on here?" I said very softly.

"Excuse me?" Bill said.

I shook my head. "Nothing. Where is another safe house?" I asked quickly and Bill showed me. It was much farther away. I reached out and tapped the spot, this time with no difficulties. My head was spinning. Was this some kind of fairy magic popping up again to help me? I was reluctant to accept my newfound abilities, but it had to mean something, right? I looked at the clock, and looked at the map. We had enough time to check one more safe house before Pam and Bill would have to find shelter. I bit my lip. If I was wrong, I could be dooming Eric. But if I was right...

"We should try this one," I said, tapping my finger on the map. Bill looked at me carefully.

"There are closer ones, Sookie."

"I know, but I really think we should go to that other one. I just have....a feeling."

Bill looked at his watch and I could tell he was doing some mental calculations. He focused his dark eyes on me a long moment, uncertain.

"I think we should listen to her," Pam said suddenly. "She has a strong tie to Eric. We should trust that."

Pam's tone left no room for debate, so she essentially made the decision for us all. Bill sat back again and shook his head.

"It'll be close," he said and Pam accelerated.

Bill gave Pam new directions and I sat in the seat, praying I wasn't wrong. Eric said there was magic at work between us now, and I couldn't help but believe him. I heard his call, I could feel him when he was close, I could sense his emotions. Those are not normal occurrences by any means. Something was there, and to call it magic was as good a name as any. And how much deeper did this blood magic run? It was something to consider another time.

Pam drove rapidly, but it still seemed like an eternity before Bill spoke, telling her it was time to exit. This time the area wasn't industrial at all, it was very rural, but still remote. Bill navigated and Pam drove us in a complicated combination of dirt paths and gravel roads that seem to stretch on for an eternity. Finally, at the end of a long and winding road, we came to a dead end in front of a barren field. Pam put the car in park and looked at Bill, as did I.

"The coordinates put the safe house about three miles straight ahead," he said. "We can probably drive through the field, or we can walk."

"Drive," Pam and I said together. She smiled at me, and I saw excitement in her eyes. I had seen that look on her face before, when we were getting ready to attack Hallow and her coven. She was ready for battle. She put the car in drive and edged forward into the field. It was rough and bouncy, and we had to go slow, but it was better than walking. I kept my eyes peeled for any signs of a building, a barn, something. I scanned the area, but saw nothing. Pam continued to drive, and her eyes were searching, too.

Then I felt Eric.

"Stop!" I screamed, and my hand went to my chest. Pam braked instantly, turned off the engine and killed the lights.

"Eric?" she asked, and I nodded.

I could barely believe it. I hadn't realized how much I'd missed him until that very moment. Feeling his presence, it was like a missing part of me had fallen back into place. I breathed heavily, in and out. He was still alive. Well, not technically, but he was still here. And he was close by.

And he was in terrible pain.

I whimpered a little, popped open the seat belt and grabbed at the door handle. I was almost out the door when Pam grabbed my arm.

"Where are you going?" she asked me, startled. Bill was already out of the car and rummaging in the trunk.

"He's in pain," I told her, and I tried to pull away; It was useless, of course.

"He'll be in more pain if you get yourself killed!" She said, and her eyes were hard.

Bill slammed the trunk and appeared beside my door. He had the stakes in one hand, his old military sword in the other, and the black bag hung over his shoulder.

"Sookie," he said, his voice charged a little. "Pam and I will deal with Izo."

"No," I protested. "No!" I looked at Pam, pleaded with her with my eyes. "I can't just stay here and wait. I'll go crazy! Pam, I can feel him!"

Pam looked at me, then up at Bill.

"No," he said firmly. "We can't let her near Izo."

"It's not your decision," I said and I jerked my arm as hard as I could and Pam let go. I got out of the car and slammed the door. Somewhere in my head I knew I was being really, really stupid. There wasn't much I could possibly do in a vampire fight, except maybe act as cheerleader. But then again, I had killed Lorena, and I had managed to injure Siegbert pretty bad. I might be just a mere human, but I was getting to be a pretty bad ass mere human.

"Look," I said, turning my eyes from Bill to Pam and back. "The only way you're going to keep me in this car is if you lock me in the trunk. And since I've had Eric's blood - and yours Pam - there is no guarantee that will hold me."

Bill stared at me like I'd grown a third eye, and Pam looked downright amused. Now that I knew what to look for, I could feel Eric more clearly, and I was getting impatient.

"Are we going, or were y'all planning to meet the sun?" I asked.

"Let's get our Sheriff," Pam said, and she grinned and started walking. I followed her and Bill brought up the rear. He wasn't happy, but he was smart enough not to try to take on two women.

The farther we walked, the more intense the feelings were coming from Eric. I actually had to stop once when a powerful wave of anger and distress washed over me. I doubled over, and held my stomach and my breathing became ragged. My Eric was in a terrible state, and I couldn't imagine what was happening to him. Pam took my arm, and waited silently for me to regroup. She placed her arm around me and I found it comforting. It was black as pitch even though the sky was peppered with stars. We walked a good way, but I still couldn't see a building anywhere.

Bill and Pam's vampire eyes saw something though, and they stopped. I started to ask a question but Bill held up his hand and silenced me. I saw him raise his face, and I knew he was sampling the air. Then he took a few more steps, and his eyes focused on the ground. He knelt down and pointed. Pam and I moved closer and it was then that I saw the metal door in the ground. It was rusted with age, and there was a huge circular, metal handle.

Pam pulled me close and spoke directly in my ear.

"Stay close to us. We will try to bargain with Izo first, but if it turns into a fight, stay clear and watch. Do not try to intervene, no matter what happens. If Bill or I are killed, get out and get back to the car. It's close enough to dawn that Izo would not risk following you."

I felt a shudder run the length of my spine, but I nodded. Bill handed me a stake, and gave the other to Pam. He held his sword at the ready, and reached down and tugged on the metal handle. The door made a terrible creaking sound as it opened and I cringed.

Bill looked down into the hole, then looked up and nodded. I peeked inside; there were stone stairs leading down. Bill went first, holding his sword with both hands. Pam went next and I followed closely behind her. It was cool, as expected, and there was a foul smell in the air. It was dark, and the farther we moved down the stairs the darker it became. Finally I couldn't see my hand in front of my face and I stopped. I reached out for Pam and felt only air. I started to panic. I touched the wall closest to me and leaned heavily against it. I took a few cautious steps and finally came to a solid, dirt floor. I held my hand in front of me and tried to get a sense of where I was. The air was much cooler now, and it was breezy, like I was in a large, open space. I had no idea where Pam and Bill had gone, and I wondered if they even realized I was left behind.

A cool hand clamped over my mouth just then and I struggled until I heard Bill's voice in my ear.

"Don't scream," he said and he took his hand off my mouth. He took hold of my arm and led me through the dark. I wondered if there were lights here at all; vampires had excellent night vision. We walked down a hallway and I was relieved to see a flickering light coming from underneath a door in distance. Then Pam was there again, flanking me on the opposite side from Bill.

"Let us go first," Pam said in my ear, and she squeezed my forearm. She and Bill moved to the door with the light and stood together. They exchanged a look, then Pam reached for the door handle. I held my breath. Pam turned the knob slowly then flung the door open wide and she and Bill disappeared inside in a flash. I heard something that sounded like a chair being overturned, then I heard a deep male voice bark out something in what sounded like Japanese.

I went to the door and stopped just short of going through. My heart was pounding so hard I could feel the blood rushing through my ears. I peeked around the corner. The room was large and round and made of stone. The flickering light was coming from a dozen or so torches scattered around the room on the walls. It was all very medieval, and a little spooky. Bill and Pam were standing about 4 feet into the room, both in battle stances, with their weapons at the ready. Beyond them I saw a young vampire - well, he looked young - dark skinned with black, tangled hair falling to his chin. I thought he might be Filipino. He was about Bill's height, maybe a little taller. He wore loose jeans, but he wasn't wearing shoes or a shirt and he had one of the most impressive physiques I'd ever seen. He wasn't heavily muscled like a body builder, but every part of him was well-defined and sculptured in a way that spoke of extreme conditioning.

Then I saw Izo and I felt a powerful rage. He was standing in the middle of the room, facing Bill and Pam, and he didn't have a weapon. He stood calmly, and if he had any anxiety about facing down two vampires with stakes you wouldn't know it from his face. Izo was a small man, perhaps 5'6 or so. He looked much like his photo on Bill's database, only in person he was much more attractive, and far more dangerous. He had shoulder length hair and a thin mustache. His face was smooth, and his eyes were black at coal. He was dressed, oddly enough, in dark slacks, polished shoes and a crisp, white shirt. He looked like he could be closing a multi-million dollar deal in any country in the world.

Sitting on the floor behind Izo was a young girl of Asian decent, and it took me a minute to realize she was also a vampire. She appeared no more than sixteen, very pretty and very recently turned from the looks of her. She was wearing torn jeans with multi-colored embroidery down the legs, tennis shoes and a tee-shirt, and she knelt on the dirt floor with her eyes cast downward.

It only took me moment to process the scene, and when I did I was terrified. Izo wasn't alone; he had two vampires with him so basically Pam, Bill and I were outmatched. Even the young girl, fresh as she was, would still have strength and speed and abilities. I pulled my head away from the door and pressed against the wall outside the room with my eyes closed and choked down my instinct to run.

"You have come for the Viking," I heard Izo say. I had never heard his voice, but I just knew it was him. His voice was deep, commanding and accented, though not heavily.

"We are willing to pay," Pam responded evenly. "We know you were hired to kill him. Whatever Madden offered, we are willing to double."

I wasn't sure if Pam was serious about that, or if she was bluffing. Eric told me Izo's greed was his downfall, so perhaps a bribe would work with him. Of course, Victor had bribed him already and Izo hadn't fulfilled his end of the agreement. Thank God.

There was silence, and I wondered if he was considering the offer. I shifted slightly, trying to hear.

"Human," I heard Izo say louder. "Is it considered polite in this country to lurk outside of doors?"

Oh, _not good_.

I hesitated, but then rallied. I was the one that insisted on coming to this tea party, so it was time to play nice with others it seemed. I moved away from the wall and walked into the room slowly to stand just behind and between Pam and Bill. Pam spared me a quick glance. Bill didn't budge.

Izo looked me over and smiled. The filipino vampire moved a few steps, taking up position closer to Pam. He stopped and knelt on the floor in front of what looked like a sleeping mat and remained there, his eyes never leaving Pam. The young girl on the floor looked up sharply when I entered the room and her eyes blazed bright with hunger.

"There is nothing you can offer me," Izo said, shifting his attention back to Pam. "And need I remind you that the Viking is mine by rights. You have no claim here."

Izo took a step forward and held his arms apart in what looked like a gesture of peace. I saw Bill tense. I still had the stake in my hand, and I clutched it harder.

"I have no quarrel with you," Izo said, looking first at Bill, then Pam. "Indeed, I find honor in your coming to your master's aide. It is quite refreshing." He smiled, but his voice wasn't exactly dripping with sincerity.

"I'm not leaving without Eric," I said and I was shocked at my own voice. Pam's eyes flashed to me in warning. Izo studied me a long moment, then chuckled. He turned to Bill.

"Go now. I have no need to levy charges against you for this interference. No harm was done. I will take what is mine by rights, and you will return to your homes." Izo clapped his hands in front of him, and I thought that may have been a signal of some sort.

The filipino vampire was still crouched on the floor, and I saw him move slightly to reach for something under the sleeping mat. The young girl rose slowly and moved closer to Bill. She looked hungry, but also terrified. Her eyes were wide and her gaze kept shifting from Izo to me and back again.

"You will leave the human as payment for my generosity and time," Izo added and I felt my eyes grow wide. "I have a young one that needs to feed." He turned to me. "And since you appear anxious to see the Viking, perhaps I can arrange that as well."

Izo smiled then and my heart skipped a beat. I had a horrible image appear in my head of Eric being forced to watch while Izo and his minions drained me dry.

Bill didn't make a sound, and he didn't hesitate. He leapt forward and swung his sword down on Izo, but the vampire smoothly dodged the attacked and spun away in a fluid movement. At the same time, the darker vampire jumped up and in his hands were two wooden sticks about two feet long and maybe an inch in diameter. He spun them around in movements so fast it was only a blur to my eyes. He advanced on Pam. She retreated a step and reached out her hand to me. I understood what she wanted and I placed the stake I was holding in her waiting palm.

I backed up against the the wall, and watched with fearful eyes as Bill fought Izo. Izo was unarmed, but he was very fast, and seemed to dodge Bill's attacks without effort. I turned to Pam and saw she and the dark vampire were heavily engaged. They were both armed with dual sticks now, and they were swinging them at one another furiously. Each time a blow was blocked it made a sharp _crack _that resounding loudly in the room. They circled one another, jumped and spun in a way that almost looked like a dance.

Before I could gather my thoughts, I felt myself shoved brutally to the ground. The young vampire child was on top of me, her fangs bared and bloodlust in her eyes. I struggled with her, and though she was a vampire, I had extra strength now and I was able to roll her off of me. She appeared stunned for a moment, and she hesitated, which gave me time to jump up and come up with something of a plan.

I reached up and grabbed one of the torches from the wall and brandished it in front of me, swinging it back and forth. The vampire took a step forward, but stopped, uncertain and fearful of the flames.

_Crack! Crack! Crack!_

I glanced back to Pam and was amazed to see her holding her own against the larger vampire. She clearly had some kind of training during her long life, and the results were impressive, to say the least. The dark vampire was equally skilled, however, and he moved like he didn't have any bones at all, going down on his knees in swift, fluid motions and then spinning and leaping up again, all the while keeping up the assault with the sticks. Pam was blocking him and moving with equal grace, but I knew it was just a game; a matter of who was going to make a mistake first. When that happened, one of those sticks would be plunged right into the other's heart.

I continued to wave the torch in front of me, which was so far being effective at keeping the young vampire at bay, and I started to make my way toward Bill. My intent was to get close enough to Izo that I could set his clothes on fire. It wasn't the greatest plan in the world, but it was the best I could come up with at the moment.

Right before I was in position to toss the torch at Izo, the ancient vampire charged at Bill and intercepted a thrust with the sword that was clearly meant to eviscerate his heart. He dodged the blade and grabbed Bill's arm above the elbow, twisted, and Bill was pulled forward and tossed to the floor. Izo changed position and brought his knee down on Bill's back, hard. Then Izo pulled upward on Bill's arm and I heard a horrible snapping sound. Bill grunted out in pain, and I screamed.

_Crack! Crack! Crack!_

I looked over at Pam again and she seemed to be moving even faster than before. The stakes she wielded were flying in all direction, so fast it looked like helicopter blades. She was still holding her own, so I turned my attention back to my ex, still on the ground under Izo, who had managed to wrest the sword from Bill's grasp. I charged at Izo, lunging at him with the torch, and he jumped back, grinning at me in a fangy way. He raised the sword slowly and spun it in his hands masterfully.

I backed up, turning to wave the torch at the female vampire a few times. She was definitely wary of the flames, and was keeping her distance. This was good because it was at that moment I realized I had Izo's full attention. He stepped toward me, but Bill - who was still on the ground with a broken arm - reached out and took hold of Izo's ankle and pulled hard. The Asian vampire turned and brought the sword down toward Bill's head. I screamed, and Bill was barely able to roll away before being decapitated. He pushed himself to his feet, but he was now unarmed, and Izo didn't hesitate. He brought the sword around in an arcing movement and caught Bill in the midsection. The stroke would have been a killing one, but at the last possible second Bill was able to move back just enough to keep himself from being bisected. But the blade cut through his skin cleanly, creating a deep, and horrible gash that ran from Bill's right shoulder all the way to his left hip. Bill coughed up blood and fell to his knees.

I charged at Izo again, and in a quick movement he used the sword to knock the torch from my hands. It fell to the floor and I backed up. Izo stalked me. The young vampire girl started for me, but Izo barked something at her in Japanese and she fell in behind him.

I risked a glance at Pam, and she looked at me for just a moment, her quick eyes taking in everything; Bill lying bloody and mangled on the floor, Izo and his minion advancing toward me. She cried out in a loud voice, and she leapt straight up into the air and spun. When she came down she used the two stakes like a baseball bat, catching the dark vampire off-guard. She hit him hard in the head and he fell backwards to the floor. His arms flailed out and Pam used the opportunity to quick advantage. She held the two stakes together over her head and brought them crashing down into the dark vampire's chest. He made a terrible sound, and shook, and then his body began to crumble.

The young vampire girl cried out in horror, and Izo turned and slapped her hard across the face, sending her spinning across the floor. Pam charged at Izo, holding one stake out to impale him, but he brought the sword up in a lightening fast, smooth motion and cut through the wood. Pam, now without a weapon, growled and bared her fangs. Izo returned the gesture.

Pam crouched; keeping her eyes fixed on the older vampire. I grabbed up the torch again and I threw it at Izo. The flames hit him, igniting his shirt, and he screamed. But my victory was short lived. Izo tore off his burning shirt and threw it to the ground and focused an angry glare on me. Pam used the moment to attack, and she jumped on Izo's back and bit into his neck with a frenzy like I'd never seen. Izo struggled with her and they both fell to the floor, Pam still ripping at his neck.

I looked around frantically and ran to the wall to grab up another torch, but just as I was reaching for it, Pam's body came crashing into me. She hit me hard and we both fell to the floor. I looked at my vampire friend, and she had a terrible wound on her head. I didn't see what Izo had done to her, but it must have been bad because Pam lay on the ground unmoving.

Izo started toward me, sword raised and I had a terrible moment of fear. I managed to rise to my knees. I was shaking almost convulsively and very scared. But then I felt a rising strength well inside me, a surge of confidence and power. I recognized the feeling, the same feeling I had in Rhodes when Eric stood up with me when I faced down the Ancient Pythoness.

Eric knew I was here, I realized. Wherever he was, despite his own pain, he understood I needed him and he was managing to lend me his support through our bond.

I knew then I couldn't let him down.

I rose to my feet and calmed my breathing. I fought back my fear and tried to concentrate, tried to summon the elusive magic I had tapped into only once before. As Izo came toward me, I screamed out with my own Sookie-version of a battle cry and slammed my mental shields up as hard as I could. I had no idea what I was even trying to do, or how to do it, but by the grace of God, it worked.

Izo ran straight at me, sword raised high, and he smacked face first into an invisible barrier that bounced him back, causing him to splay on the floor. The sword was knocked from him hand and it skittered across the floor. I backed up, and Izo stared at me with wide eyes and bared fangs.

I ran across the room and snatched up the sword and held it in front of me. Izo looked at me cautiously, uncertainly. I knew I was no match for Izo. I couldn't keep myself locked up behind this magical barrier forever and as soon as it faltered he would have this sword out of my hand in less than a heartbeat. I looked around the room, and realized I had another choice.

"What are you?" Izo asked me in a growling voice, moving slowly to stand. "What magic is this?"

I took a step forward, concentrated and lowered my shields.

"Fae!" I answered, and I threw the sword as hard as I could. It arced through the air above Izo's head. He turned and watched it, and then yelled in anger as the sword came to rest in Bill's waiting hand.

Bill, who had struggled painfully to his feet, snatched his sword out of the air with one hand, and with his one unbroken arm, he swung the blade down hard, catching Izo at the neck. The ancient vampire's head flew across the room, hit the far wall and fell to the floor.

I watched with relief and horror as Izo's headless body hit the ground and began to flake away. I looked at Bill, and saw him drop the sword, and fall to his knees, his face twisted in agony. I saw Pam, who was still foggy eyed, but moving. And then I saw the young vampire girl, crouched in a tight ball in the shadows of the room, staring wide eyed at the remains of her Master.

Pam came to stand shakily beside me.

"Are you unharmed?" she asked, and I nodded. Then she turned her attention toward the vampire girl, who was slowly starting to stand.

The young vampire looked at me, and Pam, then her gaze fixed on Bill. She ran to him, and I thought she was going to attack him, but then I watched in astonishment as she knelt in front of him and flung her arms around his neck. She was speaking very rapidly in Japanese, words just seemed to be flowing out from her. Bill, still in pain from his devastating injuries, made an attempt to put his one good arm around her in a fatherly way.

"What is she saying," I asked Pam quietly.

"I'm not sure. I know very little Japanese. But I believe she is thanking him for freeing her from Izo."

To my amazement, Bill started talking to the girl in her language. She released his neck and smiled hugely at him, and I saw streaks of red flowing from her eyes.

Bill sat down on the floor, and the young vampire didn't leave his side. But she looked up at me with hunger in her eyes. Pam took the hint and went over to the black bag we had brought from the car. She unzipped it and pulled out two bottles of blood, handing one to the girl and one to Bill. I couldn't say which of them drank it down faster.

Then Pam stumbled a little on her feet.

"Find Eric," she said and she sagged to the floor.

"I will," I told her, and I reached for her. "What's wrong?"

Pam didn't respond. She was moving in slow motion, and when I looked at Bill I saw he was lying back on the floor. The young vampire was laying near him, already asleep.

Of course, I thought to myself as understanding seeped into my brain. Dawn was here.

And in the next minute I was standing in that underground room surrounded by what was left of two finally dead vampires, and three that were dead until dark.

But the only one I cared about at that instant was the one that was still in such torment I could feel it almost as my own.

I had no idea where Eric was being kept, but I grabbed up a torch from the wall and started from the room. I paused, and went back and grabbed the black bag of supplies, just in case. I started back down the hall the way we came in - this time I could actually see where I was going, thanks to the fire. The walls were made of stone, and they were cold to the touch. The ceiling was low hanging, giving the narrow area a claustrophobic feeling.

At the extreme opposite end of the hall there was another staircase, also made of stone, this one leading down instead of up. I walked down carefully, keeping the torch pointed at the floor. The stairs seemed to go on forever, but finally I came to the end and found myself in a room almost exactly like the one where we had found Izo. Except this room was filled with coffins.

There were maybe 20 or so coffins lined up in rows on the floor. They looked very old, and all were in varying stages of disrepair. I could feel Eric's presence very strongly now, and his pain, and my breathing increased. I walked past each coffin, shining the torchlight on them.

"Where are you, baby?" I asked softly.

Then I found the only coffin in the room that was padlocked.

I tugged desperately at the lock, but it was solid. I cursed under my breath and looked around for something I could use to break it. Wood wouldn't be strong enough, I knew. Crap crap crap!

My head worked frantically, and I was on the verge of panic. Eric was right _here! _But I couldn't get to him!

I needed a crowbar or something metal, something...and then I knew. I propped the torch against the wall and sprinted back up the stairs and down the hall, and took the other stairs upward to the trapdoor. I swung it open and shielded my eyes when I saw the daylight sun. I blinked a few time and took off across the field to the car. I popped open the trunk and tossed things around until I found a metal tire iron. I cheered silently and started back, and within minutes I was back at the coffin. I jammed the tire iron into the loop at the top of the lock and with my extra strength I was able to break it with less difficulty than I would have imagined.

I flung open the coffin lid, smiling, but then I sucked in a breath and put my hand over my mouth in horror.

The inside of the coffin was filled, absolutely filled, with tiny shards of silver. I couldn't even see Eric, covered as he was. I reached in and started to scoop the shards up but then winced in pain. The shards were razor sharp, and when I pulled my hand back it was covered in blood.

I took off my shirt and covered my hands. I reached back inside the coffin and - more carefully this time - started to scoop away the metal pieces. I tossed them on the ground in a pile, and it wasn't long before my shirt was shredded and useless, so I tossed it down, too. I kicked off one of my shoes and used it as a scoop, and that actually worked pretty well. After what seemed like an eternity, but was probably only about ten minutes, I saw a strand of blond hair. My heart soared and I worked faster, trying to be gentle and not to jostle the shards too much, since I knew they were digging into Eric's flesh with every movement.

I worked for the better part of an hour, and finally I had removed enough of the nasty little silver pieces to see Eric's face and upper body. He was barely recognizable. He was burned, swollen and red. He had been stripped of his shirt, but he was still in his jeans, thank God. Every single inch of his exposed skin was cut and bloody. His eyes were closed, and I knew he was terribly weakened from the silver. Plus it was daytime and his body was rejecting any kind of alertness.

I leaned into the coffin and put my arms on Eric's big shoulders. I found out quickly that he was lying on top of silver pieces, too, when my fingers got sliced as I tried to lift him. I winced in pain, but fought it back. Eric was such a big guy, and I was at a terribly awkward angle, but I managed to raise him to a sitting position.

I looked at Eric's back and was horrified to see dozens of the little shards stuck into the skin in his back. I pulled them out one by one, as gently as I could. Eric didn't budge and his head fell forward to his chest. I whispered to him as I worked, letting him know I was here and he was safe. I didn't know if he could hear me, but it calmed me to think he could.

If not for the recent ingestion of vampire blood I would never have been able to accomplish what I did then. I wrapped my arms around Eric's waist and his head rested on my shoulder lifelessly. I pulled and tugged and little by little I was able to extract his huge body from the coffin. On the last pull, I fell backwards into the floor and Eric fell right on top of me. The wind was knocked out of me and I gasped for breath.

Eric stirred when we hit the floor, but his eyes never opened. He moved a little, and groaned.

"Eric," I said. "Eric honey, it's Sookie."

He didn't respond. The torchlight gave me enough light to see that my beautiful Viking was in terrible shape. His lovely hair was tangled and matted with blood, and his flesh smelled of unhealed, festering injuries. I wrapped my arms around him and stroked his back and shoulders, feeling hundreds and hundreds of little cuts all over his skin, so many it didn't even feel like skin anymore, more like a textured wall. It was awful. I wanted to bring Izo back to life just so I could kill him again.

Eric moved again, and I saw his nostrils flare. He tensed and I was suddenly afraid. Eric was terribly injured and in pain. He had been locked up and starved. And I smelled of blood. I tried to wiggle out from under him, but his arms held me in a vice grip so strong I could barely breathe.

"Eric," I whispered, but he didn't appear to hear me. He was lying on top of me, and his weight was crushing. He wrapped one arm around my waist and with the other he pulled my head back, exposing my throat. I felt his mouth move to my neck, and I whimpered a little. I clenched my teeth and braced myself for the inevitable bite.

But instead of his fangs, I felt Eric's lips brush my skin just under my ear.

"My lover," he whispered hoarsely.

Then his entire body relaxed, and he fell back into his daytime trance while I held him.

_- To be continued_

_This was a long one, and if you made it this far I adore you! Thanks again to my beta, to the the supportive readers! xoxo_


	22. Chapter 22

**Know Thyself**

**Chapter Twenty Two**

I lay there under Eric for a long, long time. His weight wasn't exactly comfortable, but I had zero desire to move. I stroked his hair as best I could through the tangles and bloody mats. I kissed his shoulder and his neck over and over. I closed my eyes and thanked God that Eric was still with me.

After a while I felt myself starting to slide into sleep, and I forced it back. I was utterly spent and my body was screaming at me to let it rest, but I was afraid if I closed my eyes I wouldn't wake up before Eric and the other vampires. I couldn't let that happen. I had things to do first.

As gently as I could, I pushed Eric off of me and I slid out from under his huge frame. I started to stand, but then I noticed there were still dozens of little silver shards embedded in his skin at various places; his arms, under his hair on the back of his head, even the soles of his bare feet. I pulled them out and then tossed them away with more force than was needed.

Eric was now lying face down on the filthy floor, and I just couldn't stomach that. I rolled him over to his back, brushed his hair back from his very silent, very pale face and kissed his lips gently.

"I'll be right back," I whispered, though I knew he couldn't hear me. Or maybe he could. I had never asked.

I grabbed up the torch that was starting to burn away and I headed out of the underground safe house. It was very chilly, and the ground was covered in a layer of frost. My feet crunched on the ground as I made my way to Bill's car. In my frenzy earlier, I had left the trunk standing open and the contents were chilled.

I grabbed up the bag of clothes and personal items I had brought with me, and was relieved that I had tossed in a few bottles of water, though I hadn't brought anything to snack on. Not that I was hungry; in fact I felt like I might not be able to keep anything down if I did eat. I pulled out my extra shirt and put in on, angry that I had been in such a hurry when we left that I hadn't brought my coat. I hopped in the car and found my cell phone and was relieved to see I still had service, even as far out in the boonies as we were. I dialed a number I knew by memory. I felt a moment of shame when I realized it was quite early in the morning, and not the most polite time to be making calls. But before I could change my mind and hang up, Amelia answered.

"Sookie?" she asked, and she sounded very weak.

"Yeah," I answered. "It's me."

"Oh my God, are you okay?" she asked hurriedly, seeming to instantly perk up.

I paused. That was supposed to be my line.

"I'm fine. Very tired. We found Eric. He's alive, but hurt."

Then Amelia paused. "I'm happy for you. So did Eric send the vampires for you?"

"What vampires?" I asked slowly. This was not sounding good.

"Sam called me last night," she began. "Some vamps came into Merlotte's asking for you. Sam said he recognized one of them, said he remembered him from the Bellefleur wedding."

I sucked in a breath. Jonathan. The King had apparently sent some of his crew to find me. I looked around fearfully, then felt ridiculous. It was still daytime.

"Did Sam say how many?" I queried.

"I think he said there were three or four. Sam said they weren't happy when he told them you weren't there. I guess they were a little intimidating, too. Scared a few of the customers off."

Oh, just great, I thought to myself. Once again my personal trouble had become Sam's trouble. And deep inside I knew Sam wouldn't hold it against me. He was a better friend than I probably deserved.

"I'll let Eric know," I said, and a fresh wave of fear swept through me. The King would be after Eric, too. "How are you doing?"

Amelia sighed. "I'm okay. Still really sore, but I have pain meds. And Tray is being the best nurse you can imagine. Hey! The police caught the guys that ran us off the road!"

My eyes went wide. I honestly hadn't even thought about the men in the truck since the crash; they ended up being the least of my problems that night. "Did they say why they did it?" I asked.

"Sook, you won't believe this. There were four of them. And they were all kids. The driver was the oldest and he was just seventeen. The youngest one was only thirteen!"

"Are you serious?" I said, not believing what I was hearing. "Were they with the Fellowship?"

"Looks like it," Amelia answered heavily. "The police found literature in the truck, and they had a page printed off from that web site. You were right. Looks like they knew Eric's car. The police said they followed us from Fangtasia and waited for the opportunity to ram us when no one was around."

I paused, incensed. A bunch of stupid kids, pumped up on hate. I pictured Amelia's bloody face again, how she screamed in pain when the car flipped. They could have killed her. They could have killed _me_. Then I thought about Victor, how he had shown up after the crash to find me broken and vulnerable, an easy target, and my fury doubled.

"They interviewed one of the mothers on the news," Amelia continued. "She was all upset and crying and saying she didn't raise her boy to hate anyone, even vamps. She said her son had been, I don't know, like brain washed or something. She said the kids had been talking to some Fellowship guy online for hours and hours and this guy convinced the kids they were chosen by God to help kill the minions of Satan. Can you believe that? I'm telling you, girl, these Fellowship people have really lost it if they are recruiting kids. Isn't that what Hitler did?"

"I think so," I said quietly, not really paying attention. I was stunned. _Thirteen_. I tried to think back. I was still playing with Barbies when I was thirteen. At that moment I felt like I was a hundred years old. I rubbed my eyes, feeling suddenly exhausted.

"The police want to talk to you. I have a card from one of them."

"Yeah, I'll call when I get home," I answered absently. _If I get home. _"I'm sorry I called so early. I just wanted to make sure you were alright. I felt really bad about leaving you after the crash."

Amelia paused. "When I woke up in the hospital, I vaguely remembered seeing your fairy at the crash," she said slowly. "I figured she poofed you off somewhere. She's annoying, but I assumed she had her reasons. Look, I'm gonna go. Tray wants to give me a sponge bath."

She laughed, and so did I. I told her to have fun, promised to call her again soon and we hung up. I was relieved my witch friend seemed to be doing okay. One worry down; about a hundred more to go. I opened the car door and stepped back into the cold morning air.

I went back around to the trunk and removed the cooler full of blood. I peeked inside; there were 8 left. Definitely would be needing those, and I hoped it was enough. Bill also had one of those little pre-packaged road emergency kits. I opened it and found, among other things, a couple road flares and a tiny flashlight and decided those might come in handy if the torches failed.

Once I made my way back, I stopped first in the room where the fight with Izo had occurred. Pam was lying on the floor, I checked her, saw her head wound was already nearly healed. I rearranged her a little so she looked more comfortable, then I headed over to Bill. He was so pale, and for the first time I got a good look at the terrible wound across his torso. It was ghastly. The blade had penetrated his flesh very deeply, perhaps three inches. It worried me it still looked so fresh. It wasn't healing as fast as I would have expected or hoped.

The young vampire child was lying still and peaceful next to Bill, and I was struck at how pretty and innocent she looked. Why Izo had killed the girl was something I didn't want to consider.

I took a two bottles of blood from the cooler and tossed it into my bag, then made my way back to Eric. I knelt by his side and poured some of the bottled water into my hands and started to clean him as best I could. I used the shredded shirt I had discarded earlier as a makeshift washcloth. I couldn't do much, but I was at least able to clear most of the dried blood from his face and chest. When I was done, I lay down on the ground beside my vampire and rested my head on his arm. I closed my eyes, and within moments sleep took me.

I didn't sleep well. I tossed and readjusted many times, sleeping for an hour here and there. The ground was uncomfortable beyond description, I was cold, and I was also a little worried about the vampires waking. I wanted to believe they would drink the bottled blood I had left for them and not go after me, but I had learned long ago to have a healthy respect for what vampires could do. They weren't so different from humans in that their survival instinct was, by design, their most powerful drive. The problem, of course, is that their survival for millennia depended on their consuming human blood. And here I was, the only human around. Sook Du Jour!

I pushed myself up and sat cross legged by Eric. It was pitch black now; the flame from the torch had burnt itself out. I felt around in the dark and found my bag, retrieved my cell phone and checked the time. It was very close to dark, and I began to get edgy with anticipation. The tiny light from the cell phone enabled me to find the flashlight I had brought from the car, and the flashlight gave me enough light so that I could read the directions on the road flares. I went to the farther point in the room, popped the flare and had to close my eyes from the intense light. It didn't light the room completely, but it gave a soft, flickering glow and that was good enough for me.

I paced the room impatiently, never taking my eyes off Eric's face. His wounds had healed considerably during the day, but he still had red patterns all over his skin from the silver. He'd need blood to speed the healing process, I knew. I got a bottle of True Blood and opened it, turning it in my hands to try to warm it as was possible. I continued to watch Eric like a hawk for any signs of movement. And finally I saw one.

Eric's hands moved a little, and his head rose slightly. I was at his side in an instant and I knelt down, True Blood at the ready. I pulled his head onto my lap. Eric's eyes fluttered open slowly and I held the bottle to his lips.

"Here," I told him softly. "Drink this, baby."

Eric's eyes, dark in the pale light, found mine. He stared at me for a brief moment, then his nostrils flared as he smelled the blood. His hand came up and clamped over mine on the bottle, and he drank quickly, closing his eyes in near ecstasy. The bottle was empty within seconds, and when I took it away I saw Eric's fangs had run out. He gazed back up at me with crazed hunger and pain in his eyes. I knew he was hurting badly, and I wanted to reach out and comfort him, but I knew I had to take care of his primary needs first.

"There's more," I told him, and I quickly found the bag and grabbed another bottle. I popped the lid and when I turned back around, Eric had pushed himself to a sitting position with one leg propped up. I came back to him, sat in front of him and handed him the bottle. He took it without a word and drank it down almost as fast as the first. He never took his eyes from mine, and I watched as his expression calmed, saw the intense hunger start to fade into something more manageable. His fangs retracted slowly when he placed the bottle on the ground.

It was everything I could do not to throw my arms around him, but I held back. Even though Eric was very old and had tremendous self control, there was no reason to flaunt temptation at him. I didn't want to cause him one more iota of distress than he was already dealing with. I wanted desperately to offer him my wrist, my neck, anything, but I didn't know what the rest of the night would entail. I was already exhausted, and if I was going to have to deal with Victor and the King, I would need my strength. It killed me inside that I couldn't give my vampire what he so desperately needed.

Eric and I just looked at one another for several minutes, and there were waves of emotions flowing between us. I tried to place them all, tried to decipher which were mine and which were Eric's. I felt relief, joy, confusion, hesitation, anger....

Anger?

"Sookie," Eric said at last, and his voice was rough and raw. "Why are you here?"

I blinked, then smiled a little.

"I came for you, obviously." Wasn't it obvious? I reminded myself that Eric had been in torment for days, and he was still trying to process what was happening. "Pam figured out your message, why you called to her. She knew Izo had taken you, so we came to get you back.""

"Pam brought you here?" he asked, sounding both disapproving and suspicious.

"Yes. Don't be angry with her. I would have found a way to get here on my own if she would have told me no."

Eric nearly smiled. "Stubborn," he said barely loud enough for me to hear.

"And Izo...." Eric whispered, and he closed his eyes. He lifted his head upward, turned it slightly, then frowned.

"He is no more," Eric stated solemnly, opening his eyes again. I nodded and started to get up to grab him another blood from upstairs, but a strong hand on my forearm stopped him. Eric's eyes were hard.

"Did he harm you?"

I shook my head then smiled a little. "No. I'm fine."

Relief flooded Eric's face and he released my arm, moving his hand to cup my face. His thumb stroked my lips, and I opened them slightly. I closed my eyes, reached my own hand up to cover Eric's. I relished the touch I had feared I would never feel again.

"I was so afraid," I told him, and he moved closer to me, placed his other hand on my face and looked into my eyes. "Victor told me you were dead."

"Victor?" Eric asked, and his face seemed to go even paler, if that were possible, and his voice turned deadly serious. "When did you see Victor? Did he make an attempt on your life? Did Pam protect you as she was ordered?"

"Pam thinks he made a deal with Izo," I said, sidestepping the loaded questions completely, "to have you killed to get you out of the way."

"Yes. Madden was too much of a coward to come after me himself," Eric answered, then his eyes shifted toward the door like he heard something.

"Pam," Eric said.

He pulled away from me and struggled to stand. His movements were slow and painful and I started to object, started to tell him not to get up, but then I understood he did not want his child to see him in such a weakened position. I stood and grabbed his arm, helped him to his feet. He rose to his full, impressive height and smoothed his expression. Even battered and blood stained he managed to look like the powerful vampire Sheriff he was.

Pam entered the room a second later, looking rested and pink; she had obviously found the blood. She took in the scene instantly, then walked to Eric slowly and stood before him with an unreadable expression. Her eyes fell to his chest, to the still healing wounds left from the torture. Then she lifted her face and in a movement almost too fast for me to see, she wrapped her arms around her maker and pressed her cheek to his chest. I felt my mouth pop open. It was the most human gesture I had ever seen from Pam.

It surprised Eric, too. He stood there for a good while, not responding to her at all, looking completely taken aback. But then he slowly encircled her in his arms and bowed his head to hers.

"My child," he said, almost too soft for me to hear. "Thank you."

I stood there and watched them together, and for the first time I had a moment of jealousy. It wasn't a jealousy born of fear or threat - I knew their time as lovers had long since passed and would not return. It was envy of their unique relationship. Pam and Eric knew one another, inside and out. His blood ran through her veins, and she was connected to him in a way that I never would be. She would always be part of his life, and he would always have her loyalty. They would be together long after my mortal body turned to dust. It gave me brief sadness, and Eric must have picked up on my emotions, because he turned his eyes to me over Pam's head. I tried to smile.

Pam released her embrace on Eric without warning, and stepped back. She squared her shoulders, raised her chin, and her expression became serious.

"Master," she said formally, her voice strong. "I haven't earned your thanks. I've failed you. I am prepared to accept your punishment."

Pam knelt down then, and bowed her head while I watched dumbfounded. I had only seen her kneel to Eric once before, and it was strange to witness this aspect of their relationship. Plus I was slightly annoyed with Pam still going on about her self proclaimed failure. Wasn't that water under the bridge now? We got Eric back and we killed Izo. Doesn't that by and far outweigh one alleged mistake?

Eric was apparently as confused as I was. He regarded his child for a stretch of time, and it seemed like he was trying to decide how to respond. He had no idea what she was talking about, of course. I knew we would have to tell him about what happened with Victor, especially since Victor had gone to the King leveling accusations against both Eric and me. But I was really hoping we could gloss over a few details. But looking at Pam, I had a sneaking suspicion she wasn't the gloss-over type.

"Pam," Eric said finally, and his voice was deep. "Rise. Explain."

Pam was on her feet in a second, and I took the opportunity to take a few steps back. This was not going to go well.

Pam recounted the events starting from the time she felt Eric's powerful call, up until the part when she sent me and Amelia back to Bon Temps alone. At that point she hesitated, and I saw Eric's face clamp down hard with disapproval.

"You sent her off alone with just the witch?" Eric asked quietly.

"It was a mistake," Pam stated, then she glanced at me and her eyes look almost pained. "And Sookie paid the price."

Eric looked at me sharply, then back to Pam. He took a step toward her.

"What happened?"

I didn't like his tone at all, it was truly frightening. I couldn't just stand there and let Pam take the blame for the events that happened that night, not when she didn't even know the whole story behind Victor's interest in me. I sucked in a shaky breath, and tried to think of some way to divert Eric's attention from Pam.

"We wrecked the Corvette," I blurted out.

Eric turned to me, and his brows raised.

"We were ran off the road," I hurried to explain. "It wasn't our fault. Amelia was driving, she was hurt really bad."

"Sookie was injured as well," Pam intoned. I caught her eyes, tried to silently plead with her to let me do the talking. It wasn't her obligation to be the one to have to tell Eric all the sordid details of that night.

"Pam healed me," I said, and Eric's lips turned up into a little smile for a moment, and he turned back to Pam. But then his smile dropped, and he looked at his child with suspicion.

"There is something you're not telling me," he stated, his voice still quiet.

"Pam," I started to say, but she shot me a warning look and I held my tongue.

"Victor Madden took full advantage of your absence," Pam said in an emotionless tone. "He found Sookie and attacked her. He nearly drained her and he forced himself on her as well. The Fairy Claudine was able to stop him before he could successfully turn her, and she brought Sookie back home. She and her brother began first aid measures, and when I arrived later I gave Sookie my blood so she would heal quickly. After his failure, Victor went to Felipe' and told the King you have been using Sookie to further your own agenda. He accused her of reading vampire minds. The King has issued orders to have Sookie brought to him immediately for questioning. You were presumed killed, but since you have been found, the King will certainly demand your presence as well."

Eric was very still while Pam completed her very concise and thorough synopsis. The silence in the room seemed to drag on and on, and I was very self-consciously aware of my breathing. I watched Eric's face, tried to focus on our bond and the emotions there. I could tell nothing from either source.

"Pam," Eric said finally, softly. "Leave us. We will discuss this further at another time."

And just like that, Pam was gone and I was left alone with what I knew was a very angry, very dangerous vampire. One that wasn't speaking to me, or even looking at me. Eric kept his eyes focused on the spot where Pam had stood. He didn't move, even when he broke the silence.

"Were you badly injured?" he wanted to know. His voice was calm; too calm.

"I had a broken arm, and nose, and lots of bruises and cuts from the crash," I said after a pause, my voice shaky with uncertainty. "And I....lost a lot of blood....after."

Eric still wasn't looking at me, and I was starting to become very worried. I don't know what reaction I expected, but it wasn't this one. Maybe the anger I felt earlier was directed at me. Maybe he had finally decided I wasn't worth the trouble. Because of me, he was kidnapped and tortured. And now he was going to be brought before the King and I knew that was a very dangerous situation. Maybe he was regretting not cutting me loose long ago. Or maybe he saw me as damaged goods now. I started to shake, desperate for some clue as to what he was thinking.

The silence continued for too long. There was that same undercurrent of anger starting to trickle through our bond, and it made me uneasy.

"Pam's blood healed you in full?" he asked finally.

"Yes," I affirmed, and then I felt compelled to keep going. "Please don't blame her for what happened. We didn't know what was going on; we didn't know where you were...."

"She should not have left you."

I cringed inwardly. I knew Eric was upset about what happened, but I hated having others be blamed for my problems. I was grown; I make my own decisions, right or wrong. My life was my own, no one else's. It would be easier to let someone else take the blame, sure, but that didn't make it right.

"It's not Pam's responsibility to keep me safe, Eric."

Eric's eyes went hard, and I could almost see the rage building up behind them. He turned from me. I touched his arm tentatively, and he whirled back, his eyes blazing.

"No, it was not Pam's duty to protect you," he said, and it seemed like his voice got hotter and hotter with every word. "You are _mine_. I knew something was off, I could sense it. I should have known Izo was coming for me, but I didn't see it until it was too late." Eric paced the room, went to stand in front of the coffin that had been his torture chamber. He stared at it, and it began to sink in that he had misunderstood my words. He thought I was accusing _him_ of not protecting me, and he was filled with self-loathing because he thought I was right. I took a step forward, but then Eric spoke again and I stopped.

"I allowed myself to be taken from you." His voice was almost shaking with fury now. "I didn't see Madden's plan, and I gave him the opening he desired. And while I was locked up in here, useless, he was able to...."

He broke off the sentence and roared as he grabbed the coffin with both hands and tossed it up and across the room like it was made of cardboard. It shattered into splinters, and little pieces of silver shards shot across the room in all directions. I screamed out once, and covered my head instinctively and dropped to my knees. I looked up at Eric, saw he had turned back to face me. I fought back tears.

"Eric, you're scaring me," I said weakly.

Hearing my words, Eric seemed to make a supreme effort to rein in his emotions. He walked a few steps closer to me.

"Why did you come for me?" he asked, his voice much more controlled, but still louder than normal. "My weakness nearly cost you your life. It still may, if I can't make Felipe' see through Victor's charade."

I stared at my Viking, understanding for the first time just how deep his feelings of obligation for me ran. It wasn't just male pride and ego at work, nor was it just vampire possessiveness. Something else lay beneath his anger at himself. The same thing, I knew, that lay underneath my own insanity in rushing headlong into a den of vampires armed only with a few drops of Fae blood and a makeshift stake. I rose to my feet slowly, looked Eric in the eye.

"I came for you because I love you."

Part of my head was almost expecting the sounds of angels and trumpets at my admission finally being spoken aloud. Instead, there was only silence as Eric stood there, bathed in the flickering light from the flare, his expression unreadable.

Then in a heartbeat I was lifted into the air and my back was pressed against one of the hard, stone walls. Eric's arms encircled me, and my legs wrapped around him. My breath was knocked out of me by the suddenness, and I gasped for air. Eric's face was just inches from mine.

"My Sookie," he said solemnly. "I will never fail you again."

I wanted to tell him he hadn't, but then his lips found mine and he was kissing me with pure passion, over and over. He moved from my mouth to my neck to my face, and his strong hands were both supporting me and caressing me. In between kisses, as I just concentrated on breathing, he was talking to me softly, both in English and in his unusual native tongue. He whispered endearments, he promised to avenge my pain, he swore his life to me. I tried to speak a few times, but I couldn't manage to get out a word. Instead, I tried to simply put as much of myself as I could in my kisses, in my touches, and I hoped my actions spoke for me.

"Master."

Eric growled, and broke off a kiss reluctantly. He turned his head, and I did the same. Pam was standing in the doorway, looking apologetic.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, Master, but we have a problem."

Eric kissed me one more time and whispered in my ear.

"We will continue this another time, my lover."

The he lowered me to ground slowly, but he kept an arm around me, pulling me in close to his side and under his arm. He nodded at Pam and she continued.

"Bill hasn't risen."

"Compton is here?" Eric asked in surprise, and he didn't sound exactly happy with the news. I glanced at Pam and saw she was trying to suppress a grin.

"He was the one that figured out where Izo was taking you," I explained, and Eric frowned.

"Was he injured?"

"Real bad," I said. "Izo cut him across the chest with a sword."

Eric turned his gaze back to Pam.

"Show me," he said, and we followed Pam from the room. I stopped briefly and picked up the bag and the flashlight, and I was glad I did because the rest of the safe house was frightfully dark. I ignited the second flare immediately upon entering the round room.

Bill was still lying in the same position as earlier. The young vampire was sitting beside him, drinking a bottle of blood, but when she saw Eric she jumped up and backed up against the far wall. She looked terrified.

Eric regarded her a moment, then knelt by Bill. He tore Bill's blood covered and torn shirt right down the middle and examined the slowly healing wound with a practiced eye.

"He needs blood."

"I left some up here," I said, but Pam shook her head.

"The young one drank them when she woke. She's new so she requires more to keep her strength."

"Then we're out," I said.

Eric stood up. "He'll heal on his own in time, but the wound is deep."

"It's amazing he was able to kill Izo after getting cut like that," I said and Eric's eyes went wide.

"_Bill_ killed Izo?"

Pam snickered, and Eric cursed. At least I assumed it was a curse.

"What's so funny?" I asked and Pam grinned hugely.

"I don't think the Sheriff enjoys feeling indebted...."

She trailed of, but I could almost hear the words '_to Bill'_ floating in the air.

"He'll expect a favor," Eric stated, still not sounding happy. Then he got back to business. "He may sleep for several days unless he can feed."

"We can't wait for him," Pam said. "We need to deal with the situation with the King."

I was horrified; I was wondering if they were actually talking about leaving Bill here, the way frat boys might leave a passed out buddy to 'sleep it off.'

"Eric," I said hesitantly, feeling strangely obliged to offer my services in this really peculiar situation. "I don't want to leave without him. If he'll wake up faster with blood, maybe I should..."

"No," Eric said sharply, and Pam snickered again. "There are favors....and then there are_ favors_. We'll carry him, buy him blood on the road, or I'll find him a donor, but he's not going to touch my.....my Sookie."

I breathed a sigh of relief, and I saw Eric turn his attention to the young vampire still pressed against the wall.

"You," he demanded, pointing at her. "Come here."

The young one complied, but with extreme hesitation. She understood English, it seemed. She came over and stood in front of Eric.

"What is your name?"

"Yasuka," the girl answered in a soft voice.

"Izo was your maker?"

She nodded, then it was like a tsunami just erupted inside her and she was talking without a break in Japanese. She was animated and her face betrayed a plethora of emotion as she spoke- a dead giveaway that she was freshly turned. Eric nodded now and then. Of course he would know the language of his maker. His now, _finally_ dead maker. I just loved the way that sounded.

Finally Yasuka stopped speaking and Eric turned to me and Pam.

"She's seventeen," he explained. "She was made vampire just two months ago. She was a student, one of the top in her class. Her parents were very strict with her. She snuck out one night after dark to meet some friends at a party, and Izo found her and killed her. He's been keeping her as a personal servant, and for sex. Izo has been keeping her very sheltered, and she lacks any real understanding of her new state. She believes Izo was a punishment for her defying her parents, and he did nothing to deter that belief. In fact, he has fostered her shame as a way of cementing his power over her."

"Bastard," Pam spit. I agreed wholeheartedly.

"He was the same as he was centuries ago," Eric said unemotionally. "Arrogant, greedy, needlessly cruel."

"Why did he take you?" I asked. "Victor hired him to kill you, not kidnap you."

Eric hesitated. "I don't know what his intentions were. Izo's mental powers, his call, is very strong. He came to Fangtasia and had me in chains and under his control quickly. I heard him on the phone once, and he slipped and said Victor's name. That's when I understood, though I suspected Madden's involvement before."

"But why did he put you in that coffin?" I asked. "Why did he torture you? For fun?"

Eric didn't answer, and after a long pause Yasuka spoke up. Her English was broken, but understandable.

"The Viking," she started quietly, and it sounded like Vah-kang. "He fight much with Izo. He not do what Izo say and the master make him to suffer. The master say Viking owes him much money. He say Viking was very bad long time ago; he not fight hard enough and Izo lose much."

I looked at Yasuka, then at Eric. I recalled the story Eric told me about how Izo forced his nest to fight against a much larger one, and were defeated.

"Izo was still mad about that?" How long ago did that happen, I wondered? Talk about holding a grudge.

"He has a long memory," Eric said ruefully, and then Eric's eyes scanned the room and came to rest of a little pile of blackened sludge and ash nearby. "But I guess he's over it now."

A thought seemed to occur to Eric then.

"There was a third...."

"Pam killed him," I said and Pam just waved her hand dismissively.

"You killed the stick fighter?" Eric asked her, and his smile was as proud as it could get. Pam raised her hand and seemed to be admiring her nails. When she spoke her tone was almost bored.

"Before you called me to Fangtasia, I had a lover that owned a martial arts school out west. He may have shown me a few things."

Eric laughed and I shook my head. That Pam.

"We shouldn't linger here," Eric stated. "Pam, what of news of Fangtasia?"

Pam filled Eric in on the damage, the details concerning insurance and rebuilding. Eric showed no emotion, just listened silently. He asked about human deaths, but I wasn't sure if he was truly concerned or if he was just worried about possible lawsuits.

Then Eric motioned for Pam to take Bill, and she picked up his lifeless body and tossed him over her shoulder without effort. Then Eric pointed to Yasuka.

"You will come with us," he said and the child fell in beside Pam.

We all headed up the stone stairs and through the rusty metal trapdoor and we paraded through the field toward the car.

"There are five of us," Pam said. "This will be a tight fit. Maybe Bill can ride in the trunk."

Eric seemed more than willing to go along with that plan, I noticed.

We were almost to the car, when Eric stopped suddenly and swung out his arm to push me behind him. I sucked in a breath when Pam threw Bill to the ground and crouched, baring her fangs.

Then a pair of headlights flashed brightly in front of us, blinding me. I threw up my hand to shield my eyes, and squinted into the night, trying to see what was happening. I reached out, trying to get a read on the minds in the vehicle in front of us, but found only empty holes. Vampires. Had Felipe's men found us here in Mississippi? My heart raced and I clutched Eric.

"Who is there?" Eric demanded.

I heard a car door open and shut, and saw the lights from the head-lamps become obscured as someone walked in front of them. Gradually, a lone figure emerged from the darkness, and I relaxed when recognition hit me.

"Northman, I am so pleased to see you well," Russell Edgington stated in his slight southern drawl. Then he nodded to Pam and favored me with a brilliant smile. Eric and Pam were still tense and unmoving.

"Russell," Eric said, and he bowed slightly from the neck.

The King actually laughed and stepped forward, looking Eric up and down. His wounds were still in various stages of healing.

"Looks like you had a rough go of things," he commented, then looked down at Bill lying on the ground. "Compton, too, it seems." Then he turned back to Eric. "I have come to offer my assistance."

"Assistance in what?" Eric asked suspiciously.

"Your King has vampires waiting for you in Louisiana to transport Miss Stackhouse to Nevada. It is my understanding a trial has been called."

Eric shifted position slightly, and Pam followed suit.

"There is treachery at work here, Russell. I will say no more, except that Sookie is mine, and I will not permit her to be taken to trial."

"You know as well as I do that she has no choice but to go. If she doesn't go willingly, she will be taken by force. You have to sleep sometime, my friend. The King will find her eventually. And the way I understand it, if you are found, you are also summoned."

Eric was silent for a long while, and I started to panic a little. I pressed my chest against Eric's back and peeked around him at Russell.

"What assistance are you offering?" Eric asked, and his tone wasn't nearly as strong as before. I didn't like that. It meant Eric believed our options were becoming limited.

Russell smiled again, and pointed behind him to the vehicle with the bright headlights. "I am offering to take you to Nevada personally. You can stay at my mansion this night and recover your strength. We can leave by private plane at sundown tomorrow. You can have access to anything you need within reason; clothes, computer, phones...and it appears Bill here will need a donor." Russell frowned. "Possibly two."

Eric and Pam looked at one another, and I caught Russell's eye and he winked at me. I wisely kept my mouth shut. After some extended silence and much cryptic casting of glances, Eric nodded in agreement.

"I accept your offer, and thank you. Pam will need to return to Shreveport and see to Fangtasia and our other responsibilities."

"Very well. Pam, it was nice to see you again. And who is this?" Russell looked at Yasuka with interest.

"A young one without a master," Eric said, and the words were loaded with a double meaning Russell understood. The King chuckled.

"Hmmm. If one were to commit a crime in my area, say, the killing of another vampire, I could have just cause in leveling charges against that person...."

I tensed up. I remembered what Pam said about consequences and what those consequences could be. I shuddered, afraid for Bill.

"However," Russell continued in a detached way. "If I were to overlook such a crime, the guilty party might feel...indebted to me, would they not?"

"They might," Eric said, and the corner of his mouth turned up in a smile. All this double-talk was making my head spin, but Eric was just loving it apparently.

"Well then," Russell said and clapped his hands together. "I see no reason to delay our departure. Our friend here needs blood, and I'm sure Miss Stackhouse would like a hot shower and some human food. Shall we?"

Russell gestured toward the vehicle and Eric started forward. He pulled me to his side as we walked, keeping a tight grip on my waist. Pam picked up Bill and trailed behind. When we got closer, I saw that the King had a long, black limousine waiting, complete with a driver in a little black hat. I smiled despite the situation.

Eric opened the door for me and I slid in on the beautiful black leather seats. Pam opened the door on the other side and dropped Bill face up into the long seat across from me. She returned a few moments later with Bill's bag of personal items and his laptop and sat them right on top of Bill's stomach without a thought. She caught my eyes and gave me a meaningful smile, wished me luck and was gone.

"I need to talk to Pam for a few minutes," Eric told me and he shut the door. Russell slid in from the other side, and sat down next to me. I felt awkward just sitting there along with him - I didn't count Bill since he was clearly out of it - so I felt the need to say something.

"Thanks for helping us Mr. Edgington," I told him and he patted my leg.

"It's my great pleasure, young woman."

"How is your husband?" I asked conversationally, trying to make small-talk while we waited.

"Bartlett is well," Russell said, and he seemed genuinely pleased I had asked. "Bill has been helping us with some projects, and my husband is most anxious to get Indiana up to speed."

"I got to say sir, you and Mr. Crowe seemed really great together. I mean, some of the Kings and Queens I met, they didn't....well, they didn't seem to..."

"Like each other?"

"Yes, sir."

Russell laughed. "Bartlett and I are the exception to the rule, this is a sad fact. We truly are well matched for one another. As are you and Eric, if I may be so bold."

I flushed a bit and smiled.

"Even though I'm grateful for your help, I'm not sure why you're doing it. Can't you get into trouble with Felipe? I'm sorry if that's a rude question, I'm still learning a lot about your rules."

"And there are many," Russell lamented, and for a moment he sounded very human. "But for simply helping some stranded vampires and their companions return to their King, I should think there would not be an issue. But, between you and me Miss. Stackhouse, I might well make a slight breach in tradition, or bend a few laws, for Eric."

"Why?" I asked, surprised.

"Eric held the blade that bound Bartlet and I together," he said solemnly. "For this, Eric will always have a little piece of my heart." The King tapped his chest, and I couldn't help but grin at the corny gesture, and the even cornier words. But whatever the reason, I was thankful for his taking us in. It may only be delaying the inevitable, but I _did_ need a shower, Bill did need blood, and Eric would have a chance to formulate a plan without worrying about me, or himself, being taken by force in Louisiana.

Eric opened the door and Yasuka slipped into the long seat beside Bill, then Eric slid in beside me. Russell tapped the window in between us and the driver and off we went. Eric put an arm around my shoulder and I leaned into him heavily. He kissed my head. Russell opened up a little refrigerator that held bottles of blood and warmed one up in a little heating unit I had never seen before. He handed it to Eric, who thanked him. Eric started to take a drink, but then he noticed Yasuka staring at me and he handed her the bottle instead. She drank it down, holding it with both hands.

"Thanks," I whispered to him, and when I looked up he kissed me lightly.

"Russell," Eric said after a few minutes. "Do you happen to recall the room we used the night Sookie was staked?"

"Why yes, I believe I do," the King answered. "Was it to your liking, Leif?" Oh yes, Russell had a sense of humor, indeed. Thank God.

"It was indeed _very_ much to my liking," Eric said smoothly, and he squeezed my shoulder as I tried not to giggle. "If it's not too much trouble, do you think Sookie and I could borrow that room again during our stay?"

Russell seemed to think. "I don't believe that would be a problem; it's vacant at the moment. I must say, I'm surprised you would want Miss Stackhouse to have a reminder of such a terrible night."

"It wasn't all bad," I said quietly and Eric chuckled.

"I see," Russell said softly, with a knowing smile. "I'll arrange it for you then.

_To be continued_

_-_

_(with humble apologies to Alan Ball! Ha!)_

_Sorry for the delay this week! Thanks again for the support! I was hoping to get this thing wrapped up before DaG, but doesn't look like that's going to happen. Hopefully y'all will still come back even after we all get the real deal come May 5th! (so excited!) xoxo_


	23. Chapter 23

Know Thyself

Chapter Twenty Three

The drive to Russell's mansion was mostly silent. Eric kept his arm around me, and I could tell by his rigid posture he was deep in thought. Plotting, no doubt; going over every possible scenario the King and Victor could throw at him and figuring out a way to counter it. Eric and I were in some serious trouble, but I was confident that if anyone could finagle a way out of it, it would be my vampire. At least that was what I kept telling myself.

When we arrived at Russell's estate, I took a moment to really appreciate the beauty of it. It was a home matched for the King, magnificent in its Southern charm, classic and historic. We were met at the gates by a guard -vampire with a small hand-held electronic device of some sort. Russell gave the guard all of our names, they were keyed into the device, and only then did the heavy metal gates open to allow our entrance. It was hard to remember since the last time I was here I had a big piece of wood stuck in my side and I was hopped up on pain killers, but it seemed like the King had really stepped up his security.

We piled out of the limo at the front door of the mansion, Eric picking up Bill and tossing him over his shoulder while Yasuka carried his gear. When we got inside we were bombarded with open stares from Russell's many guests. Vamps and humans alike - all male and all attractive - were looking us over with extreme curiosity, many times mixed with a shade of disgust. None of us, especially Eric and still unconscious Bill, looked in top form, so I can't say I blamed them.

Russell summoned a tall, lean, human male, and the fella walked over slowly - too slowly -moving in a catlike, seductive fashion. He made a point to cast an appreciative glance at Bill's rear end, which was prominently on display over Eric's shoulder.

"Prepare room three," Russell instructed, and the human nodded deeply and backed away a few steps before doing a little flourish of a turn and heading up the impressive stairway.

"Bill?" Eric added, and the King motioned for us to follow him.

We all trudged up the stairway and when we got to the top Russell escorted us to a room at the opposite end of the hall from where Eric and I would be staying.

The room was every bit as nice as the one I remembered from my last visit, but it was slightly smaller. The bed was king sized, and the mattress must have been pretty plush because when Eric tossed Bill down - none too delicately - Bill's sleeping body bounced a few times before settling. The good news was that the jarring movements seemed to rouse him some; he made a small noise and I saw his head move a little. Yasuka tentatively moved to stand beside the bed, and she cast her eyes up at Eric as though she was seeking approval. Eric nodded at her briefly, and she climbed up and sat cross legged on the bed beside Bill.

"I'll fetch him a donor," Russell stated, his drawl so thick it sounded like "doe-nah."

"Bottled blood would suffice Russell," Eric offered.

"Nonsense," the King said, dismissing the suggestion with a wave of his hand. "Bill here has been of considerable service to me, and he will continue to be in the future I do believe. The least I can do is ensure he has a proper meal while he is in my charge."

Well, that certainly put quite a spin on the concept of southern hospitality. Russell turned and walked nobly from the room, and I watched him go, feeling uncertain.

"Do you think this is okay?" I whispered to Eric. "Do you trust Russell?"

Eric grunted and smiled down at me. "Trust him? Not particularly. I do trust that he'll not soon forget I owe him, however."

I kinda figured that was the case. Vampires were big on tit for tat, and they never, ever seemed to forget who owed them what and vice versa. I wondered if Eric kept track of his favors on his computer, right beside the Fangtasia employee roster.

Eric turned his attention to Yasuka then, and both his voice and posture altered; he became the Sheriff.

"Yasuka," he said and the young vampire raised her eyes to him immediately. "I know Izo did not explain our rules to you, so you will listen to me now."

Yasuka nodded, slid off the bed and moved to stand in front of Eric. Something in her actions reminded me of a child about to be scolded.

"You will be properly schooled at another time, but for now I will be brief. You are under my charge, and you will obey me without question. This is for your own protection, because there are many rules and traditions in place that you do not yet understand. You are in the home of a vampire King, a position of great power for our kind in this country. You will not feed from any human while we are here, unless one is offered to you, and even then you must ask my permission. I will make sure you are supplied with as much synthetic blood as you require. You will not go hungry. Do you understand me?"

"Yes, Master," she replied softly.

"Good. You will stay in this room for the time being. And you may call me Eric."

Yasuka bowed at the neck, and went back to sit on the bed by Bill. I noticed she looked around the sparse room nervously, her eyes finally coming to rest on Bill's laptop case.

I took Eric's hand and he looked down at me.

"Do you think it would be okay if she used Bill's computer?" I asked. "She's still a teenager, and teenagers get bored....."

"And then they find trouble," Eric finished with a smile. "Yes. Yasuka, if would like to use the computer to occupy your time, you may do so."

The vampire brightened immediately, and began pulling out cords and familiarizing herself with Bill's laptop.

Further discussion was halted when Russell strode back into the room, followed closely by another vampire I recognized as one of his guards, and several human males. The room had suddenly become uncomfortably crowded, so I pressed myself against the far wall and tried to be invisible.

"Keith, if you would be so kind," Russell said, and I watched as a tall, dark skinned man about my own age, clad only in a pair of tight, red, leather pants, moved onto the bed and straddled Bill's sleeping form. I wrinkled my nose. Eric went to Bill's head, lifted it with one hand and shook it roughly.

"Bill!" Eric demanded, and he shook again. "You need to feed. Wake up!"

Finally Bill roused a little, and his eyes opened just a slit. Eric pushed Bill up further and Keith leaned forward, allowing his neck to hover just at Bill's mouth. I took the opportunity to peek into the mind of the humans, and found them all very eager and willing donors. And it was a good thing, too, because just then Bill's hunger kicked in and he latched onto the donor's neck none too gently and began to feed in earnest. Keith didn't seem to mind the roughness a bit; in fact he made a noise than sounded pretty enthusiastic, and he sort of wiggled against Bill. I averted my eyes, wondering if I really needed to be here for this.

I glanced at Yasuka, and her fangs had run out. She was almost shaking with hunger as she watched Bill feed.

"Young one," Russell said, walking over to her, and gesturing to another one of the humans; this one a smallish red haired teenager that was probably not much older than Yasuka. "This is Lucas. He is a friend of mine, and if you find him agreeable, he would like to offer you his blood."

Yasuka's eyes went wide, and she jumped from the bed, staring at Lucas. Then she stopped and turned to Eric, her eyes pleading.

"She is freshly turned," Eric stated as he pulled a still hungry, but sluggish, Bill away from Keith with effort. The donor removed himself from the bed, and the third human in the room took his place. Bill bit and started feeding again while Eric continued.

"I'm not sure how much she was taught in regards to safety and etiquette. If your human is still willing, I will allow her to feed from him, but I would want to hold her, in case her control lapses or she attempts to take too much."

"I appreciate your honesty," Russell said, and he looked over at Lucas. The teenager smiled at Yasuka, and I could read in his mind he found her both attractive and exotic; his candle apparently burned at both ends.

"You won't hurt me, will you?" Lucas asked her sweetly.

"I try not to," she answered, lisping a little since her fangs were out. She managed a small, almost shy smile. It was really kind of sweet, in a scary, goth sort of way.

After another minute or so, Eric pulled Bill away from the second donor, and I had to admit my ex looked a hundred times better; he was pink, and the wound on his chest was already visibly healing. Bill lay back on the bed with a contended groan and closed his eyes. Eric patted his shoulder.

"Rest up, my friend," Eric said; then he walked around the bed and stood towering behind Yasuka, who hadn't removed her eyes from Lucas. He placed his hands on her upper arms firmly and then nodded to Russell.

If the red haired teenager had any fear, he sure wasn't showing it. He stepped close to Yasuka - he was not much taller than she - and put his hands on her waist. She made a little squeaky noise and tried to reach him, but Eric's hands held her in check. Lucas stepped in very close to her, and smiled at her reassuringly, before leaning down a little and tilting his head to the side. She closed her eyes and bit, and when she tasted the blood, her vampire instincts claimed her, and her sweetly human demeanor faded before my eyes.

I saw her jaw move as she drank, and deep, primal noises came out her small body. She strained against Eric's grip, trying to get closer to Lucas, who responded by wrapping his arms tightly around her and stroking her back. His mind told me he was feeling sympathy for Yasuka, and whatever twist of fate had brought her so far from home. He was also enjoying the way her mouth felt as she sucked. I felt my face growing hot with embarrassment at being witness to what I always considered an intimate act.

"Enough," Eric said after what seemed like far too long. He stepped back, pulling Yasuka with him. She fought him, but only briefly, because Eric squeezed her arms very tightly. She released her mouth, and Lucas started to step away but Eric stopped him.

"Not yet," Eric said, and Lucas froze. "Yasuka, you have fed from him, and now you must help the wounds to heal."

"How?" she asked, looking up at Eric. She had blood still on her lips, and she licked it off hungrily.

"Lick the wounds you gave him. Your saliva has healing properties."

Lucas stepped back to her, and seemed to be happy to be in close contact with her again. Yasuka gently licked up the last of the blood and very thoroughly coated the puncture marks.

"Very good," Eric said, and released Yasuka from his grip. She smiled brightly up at Eric and then peeked shyly at Lucas from under her eyelashes.

"She really wasn't taught at all, was she?" Russell asked, frowning.

"No," Eric answered. "Her maker was not one to concern himself with the needs of others; Human or vampire."

"A pity," Russell said, then his mood brightened. "The room you requested has been prepared for you. There are fresh towels on the bed if you would like to take a shower. And from the looks of you, I'm going to assume you would like to. Eric, if you can let me know your sizes, I can send one of my people to get you some clothes and shoes."

"Thank you, Russell, you've been more than generous."

"Is there anything else?"

"Actually, there is. I need to call my King, and check in with my people in Shreveport."

"Of course," Russell smiled. "I thought you might. I took the liberty of having a phone placed in your room."

Eric raised an eyebrow.

"It is quite secure, Eric, I promise you. I wouldn't dare be so rude as to eavesdrop on my own guest."

"Of course not," Eric smiled. "And even if you were to be rude, it's not like I have another option, do I?"

Russell smiled, too. "No. I'm afraid not. I'll leave you to your night, then. Feel free to join us downstairs if you desire." The King bowed to me and smiled. "Miss. Stackhouse, we left a tray with fruit in your room. If you require anything else, do not hesitate to ask one of my people."

"Thank you, sir," I said, and I inclined my neck, hoping like mad Russell's southern gentlemen act _wasn't_ just an act.

Then he was gone, and the two humans Bill had fed from followed the King, but Lucas stayed. I saw he and Yasuka were chattering quietly away in a corner of the room, hovering over Bill's laptop that had been plugged in and turned on. They looked for all the world just like a couple of ordinary teenagers just then, and my heart felt a sharp pain.

"That reminds me," I said absently. "I talked to Amelia. She said the police caught the guys that ran us off the road. They were just kids! They had pages from that Fellowship website in their truck, the one with your picture. And mine."

Eric's arm snaked around my waist and he pulled me to him.

"I hope they were insured," Eric said, frowning. "And they are fortunate the police caught them before I did."

I smiled a little, wondering how much of his vengeance would have been levied on account of his Corvette. Boys and their toys.

"The Fellowship of the Sun crazies came after you?" Lucas asked suddenly.

"Yeah. They have been causing trouble in Louisiana," I replied glumly. "Someone made a website with photos of vampires and humans that associate with them. Like a hit list."

"Oh, man. That sucks."

"Yeah," I said. "It does."

"They have started to get really bad here, too. I haven't heard about them having a website, but I'll check. I'm sure Russell would want to know."

I smiled at Lucas. His mind was pretty open, and I read that he had been shuffled around in foster care his whole life until he turned eighteen a few months before. A friend of a friend introduced him to Russell, and he felt grateful to the King for taking him in and giving him a paying job, even though the job came with some pretty big strings attached. But they were strings he actually found he enjoyed.

"Yasuka," Eric called, and she looked up at him. "Remember my instructions. I will be back to check on you later."

"Yes, Mast...Eric."

Eric kept me firmly at his side as we walked from the room and headed down the familiar hallway. We passed one of Russell's house aides, and Eric took a moment to request some True Blood be brought upstairs for Yasuka, and for Bill when he woke.

I smiled up at Eric. "You're really good at that. Taking care of things. Taking care of your people."

"Mmmm. I'm glad you think so. However, the only person I want to care of right now is you."

He stopped and looked down at me when we got to the door of what would be our room and his eyes glowed with warmth. He bent and kissed me, gently at first, then stronger. I molded myself against him, enjoying the cool firmness of his still naked chest. I ran my hand from his shoulder, down his stomach and pulled teasingly on the waistband of his jeans. He made an appreciative sound and pulled away just long enough to open the door.

The room was just as I remembered it; except it had a new comforter to replace the one I had 'borrowed' during my last visit. The bed was a four poster canopy; there was a small desk and some sitting chairs and a little clock radio on the nightstand beside a cordless phone. As promised, there were several big towels waiting for us on the bed, and Russell had even managed to round up two robes, one black and one emerald green, both silk.

"I have to make a few phone calls," Eric said and I sighed. This was the part where he found a way to ditch me so he could call his people and conspire in secretive, vampire ways. And after everything I'd been through with him in the past week, I didn't even care. Eric was going to do what he had to do, and I was going to do what I had to do. I picked up a couple towels and the smaller robe and my little bag of personal items.

"I'm going to go take a shower," I said, smiling.

Eric's arms found me again and he kissed me lightly. "I will join you shortly, lover."

"Better not take too long," I teased, and I turned on my heel and started to the door. "Water, water, everywhere, nor a drop to drink..." I chanted and I heard my vampire chuckle. I closed the door behind me when I left and headed to the bathroom, which fortunately was very close.

I turned on the water in the shower to let it get nice and hot, and I peeled off my dirty clothes. I wrapped a towel around me and tucked in it, brushed my teeth and then just stood there in front of the sink for a little while, processing the day's events. I didn't get a chance to process them for long, though, because just then the door opened.

I smiled, happy that Eric had joined me so quickly, but then my smile faded when I realized it wasn't my vampire coming through the door. Instead, I found myself sharing the room with the two humans that had donated blood to Bill just a little while before.

"Excuse me!" I said, and clutched the towel around me with both hands.

The darker one - Keith, I recalled - just smiled and sort of pushed his way past me, reaching into a drawer under the sink to grab what looked like a make-up case. The second one also ignored my protests, but at least had the common courtesy to speak.

"We won't be but a minute here, little girl," he said to me, and he wiggled his way in front of the mirror and picked up a brush and started to work on his hair, which was longer than mine by several inches. I looked him up and down, took in his demeanor, his stance and his rather extreme choice in clothing (a pink and green polka dot one piece number) and decided if he wasn't the most flamboyant gay man I'd ever met, he was definitely in the top ten.

"Hey, look guys, I don't mean to be rude, but I was just about to get into the shower here...."

"Oh go on, girl," Keith said, looking at me for a second in the mirror while he expertly applied some eyeliner. "We ain't gonna stop you."

I knew my mouth was hanging open, and I barely knew what to say at that point. I barked out a laugh, and the other guy turned to me, still brushing his long, light brown hair. Long, with hi-lights, I noticed.

"My name's Trinity," he said.

Right.

"His name is _Ted_," Keith said, earning a glare from his pal.

"But they call me Trinity," Ted explained with a leer. "Because I have three skills that are legendary."

"Don't ask," Keith whispered to me.

"Wasn't gonna. Look guys, I really need to finish up in here...."

Ted interrupted me with a wave of the brush. "We have a little party we're supposed to attend, and this is the only bathroom open up here, so we're just going to have to share for a few minutes."

"You a friend of Russell?" Keith asked before I could respond to Ted.

"Uh, yes. Sort of. Look guys, my vampire is going to be coming down here in any minute...."

"Ooh! That tall drink of water is yours?" Ted asked. He was done with his hair and he reached for the make-up kit but Keith smacked his hand.

"Not done here," Keith said in a sing-song voice.

"Gentlemen," I said, and I tried to sound dignified despite the situation. "You really need to go."

"Russell must really like you," Keith said, ignoring my words completely. "He doesn't invite too many people up here anymore."

"Yes, he's very kind," I agreed hurriedly, getting frustrated.

"He's a vampire, but he's good people," Ted stated. He had opted for putting some multi-colored bands in his hair while he waited for his turn with the make-up. The bands matched the polka-dots on his jumpsuit, and that's when I decided Ted just cleared the top five on my list. I tossed up my hands and leaned against the wall. I was giving up.

The guys finished up, and just as they opened the door to leave, Eric was walking up wearing the other robe. It was black silk, and it looked good on him. He looked at me leaning against the wall in a towel with my arms crossed, then he looked at the two men, who looked right back at him - up and down and back up - before they turned and sashayed down the hall. Eric walked into the bathroom, closed and locked the door behind him before turning to me.

"I'm going to assume those two didn't try anything untoward with you, am I correct?"

"I think one may have accidentally used my lipstick," I said with a smile. "Did you talk to the King?"

Eric frowned. "Yes. He was surprised to hear from me. I was ordered to Nevada, as we expected would happen. There will be a trial. I will have an opportunity to make my case."

"Oh, Eric," I breathed, suddenly terrified. I didn't like the sound of that at all. "What are we going to do?"

Eric smiled gently and stepped close to me. "What we are going to do is enjoy our evening together."

"Eric...." I started to say but he placed a finger on my lips.

"No arguing. I will worry about the trial later. Right now, I just want to enjoy my night, and celebrate my freedom with the beautiful woman who came to my rescue."

I sighed and smiled. It was hard to argue with a guy that had been buried in silver for days.

Just then loud music started playing from somewhere downstairs, then there was laughing and cheering, loud enough to be heard even though we were upstairs and the shower was running. Guess the party had started.

"Russell has a lot of humans around here," I said. "They all seem to really like him."

"Hmmm," Eric said, reaching in to check the temperature of the water. "He's very attuned to humans. It's one of his gifts."

"Really?" I asked, genuinely curious. "How so?"

Eric dropped the towel he had brought onto the sink counter and then hauled me into his arms and held me tightly.

"You know when we take blood from a human, we know a little about that person," Eric began, and I nodded. "With Russell it's much more prominent. He can sense emotions much stronger, and even understand them. He can do this even if he only gets a drop or two of blood from a human."

"That's a strange gift," I mused.

"It's convenient," Eric said. "It keeps his humans happy and loyal, because he has a sense of what they want and need from him, but it is also detrimental. Russell has never been able to truly separate himself from his prior humanity. He still tends to think as a human, feel as a human, because he has such a deep understanding of them."

"Is that so bad?" I asked a little defensively.

"It can be very bad, yes."

Eric effectively ended further conversation on the matter by kissing me long and hard. I reached up and stroked his hair, and felt the matted blood that was still there. I cringed at the reminder of his torture.

"We need to get you cleaned up," I whispered, and I moved my hands to the belt on the robe. I untied it and Eric let it fall to the ground, and at the same instant I was divested of my towel. I took moment to admire my vampire's many assets, then stepped into the warm water, Eric right behind me. The shower wasn't big, but far larger than the one at my house, and there were several bottles of shampoo and some soap already prepared for us.

I lifted my face to the water and let it pour over me. I raised my hands and pushed my hair back, and I felt Eric run his strong hands up and down my sides. I turned to face him and his arms slid around my body. I stepped back, pulling him with me under the shower spray. As the warm water hit him, it washed away a lot of the matted blood and dirt and the water under our feet became a murky combination of red and brown.

"Let me clean your hair for you," I said and he chuckled.

"You can clean anything of mine you like."

"I'll remember that," I teased and poured some fruity smelling shampoo into my hands. I was trying to figure out how I was going to actually reach Eric's hair to properly wash it, but then he went down on one knee in front of me, effectively solving the height problem. He looked up at me, and his fangs were showing.

"You are truly a beautiful woman," he said, then his hands began to explore, running along the outside of my legs and then moving to cup my bottom. He leaned forward and nuzzled his face into my stomach, kissing me. "And you are mine," he whispered against my skin.

I smiled and began to work the shampoo into his hair, lathering it thoroughly, and massaging my fingers on his scalp.

Eric made a contended sound, and his hands kneaded my bottom, then my hips. I realized in this position he was at the perfect height to take my breast into his mouth, and that is exactly what he did. His hands went around to stroke my back and he used his fangs to very gently nip at me, first one nipple and then the other, drawing a very tiny amount of blood from each one. I wriggled a little, feeling warmth starting to spread from various locations. I had to concentrate to keep my mind on washing Eric's hair instead of pulling it.

After several minutes, Eric stood up and rinsed his hair. Then he returned the favor, washing my hair while I lathered him up with soap. We kissed one another, and stroked and teased while we cleansed away the last remnants of Eric's terrible ordeal.

Eric turned off the shower and we dried one another off with the towels. He helped me with my robe, then donned his. He opened the door to the bathroom and peered down the hallway, turned to me and smiled. The party was clearly in full swing downstairs, and it sounded like everyone was having fun, but we wouldn't be joining.

"We're clear," Eric said and before I could say a word he had me in his arms and he was heading to the bedroom.

He shut the door and latched it with one hand, never putting me down. I noticed he had dialed down the lights to a very soft glow- they were on a dimmer switch - and he had already turned down the covers and blankets on the bed.

Eric walked me to the bed and gently deposited me across the soft, comfortable mattress. He removed his robe and tossed it away, then he reached down and untied mine and I wriggled out of it. I lay on my back and reached out to Eric. He placed one knee on the bed and leaned forward to grasp my hands. Our eyes met. I smiled, tugged at him. He didn't move.

"I thought I'd lost you," he said unexpectedly, and the seriousness in his voice gave me pause. I sat up slowly.

"I thought I'd lost you, too," I told him quietly. "But we're here now, and we're together."

"Yes," he whispered. "We're together." He took my face in his hands and kissed my lips delicately. "As it should be."

I wasn't sure he was even talking to me, but then he gently lowered me back to the bed and his hands began to explore, making me squirm with pleasure. He slid down my body and used his mouth and I ran my fingers through his hair, writhing and breathing heavily as Eric skillfully elicited intense feelings of arousal within me. He knew exactly what he was doing, and when I looked down at him, he was all but smirking when he caught my eye. His tongue flashed out while he was still looking up at me, and I watched as he flicked it hard against me over and over. I arched my back, and my eyes closed and I moaned out Eric's name.

We went on like that for a while, with him kissing and teasing me, bringing me to the edge and then lowering me back. I was almost insane with wanting him, and I put my hands on his strong shoulders and tried to pull him back up. He chuckled a little and ignored my attempts, turning his face to my inner thigh and nuzzling it.

"Oh, yes," I breathed, hoping he was going to bite me. I wanted him to bite me, I realized. Very much. I wanted to be inside him, wanted my blood to feed him, and heal him and satisfy him. I knew the little pain of the bite, mixed with Eric's ministrations, would send me careening over the edge

I felt Eric's hand snake along the outside of my thigh, holding me in place, I felt his fangs scrape my soft flesh and I said _'yes'_ again...and then I heard a very loud _click_ as the little clock radio on the nightstand flipped on. Apparently the previous occupant of this room had set the alarm for midnight, and he had set it so the radio would play. And the music was absolutely blaring.

I jumped in surprise, Eric froze, then we looked at one another and couldn't help but laugh when we recognized a familiar voice singing _'Burning Love._'

Bubba, it seemed, was two for two in his interruptions.

Eric kissed my tummy once then pushed himself up, still grinning. I wiggled myself around and flipped over onto my stomach, stretching out to reach the clock. I fumbled with it a bit, trying unsuccessfully to figure out how to turn it off.

"Allow me," Eric said and with one quick movement, he brought his fist down on the device and it shattered into a dozen pieces.

I giggled. I was still lying on my tummy, and the position seemed to give Eric ideas. He wrapped an arm around my waist and hauled me up onto my hands and knees and positioned himself behind me, running his hands along my back from my shoulders to hips. Despite our interruption, we found ourselves quickly back in the mood. He leaned forward and moved my hair away so his mouth was just behind my ear.

"My lover," he whispered, and he kissed my neck and then moved down to my shoulder. One hand reached around and long fingers played and teased while Eric whispered words I didn't recognize into the skin on my back. I loved it when Eric spoke to me in his ancient language. It sounded beautiful, and reminded me what a unique and fascinating life my vampire must have lived.

"What are you saying?" I asked him softly.

Eric's mouth came back to my ear, and he kissed it and used his tongue.

"Let me show you," he said and I felt him press against my entrance.

I stretched my arms out in front of me and leaned forward, raising my hips and opening myself fully to him. Eric slid into me and I heard him groan. He held my hips and rocked me against him, moving slowly at first while we found our rhythm, then faster and faster. I closed my eyes, concentrated on my body, and his. I loved the way he felt inside me, the way he filled me so completely, like we were two pieces of a puzzle, perfectly matched.

My body gripped him and I moved my hips in a circular motion while he thrust into me, and I heard him say _my Sookie _over and over.

"I'm yours," I responded and his hands gripped my hips harder before moving one hand back around to slide a finger along my nub, which was taut with arousal. Every touch was electric, every movement almost too much to bear. I whimpered and tossed my head back, my mouth falling open as I felt Eric bringing me closer and closer to the edge.

"Not yet," Eric whispered suddenly, his voice husky with his own excitement. "I want to watch you."

He pulled away from me and I cried out with loss, but Eric worked fast and he lay down on his back and hauled me on top of him so I was straddling his hips.

I took the hint quickly, and I lowered myself onto him, taking him in completely. Eric's eyes devoured my body, and his hands slid up over my ribs and found my breasts.

"You're amazing," he said, and his hands moved down to grip my bottom as I leaned forward, grinding into him while I kissed his lips. He moved his hands to my face and returned my kisses with an almost wild frenzy. When we pulled apart, I saw his fangs shining and the hot light of hunger burning in his eyes.

"Take me" I said, and I sat straight up, burying Eric as deep inside me as I could manage. I moved my hips powerfully, raising and lowering myself on him, making him growl. "Drink from me," I demanded, and I barely recognized my own voice, as charged with desire as it was.

I sure didn't have to tell Eric twice. His lips pulled back and he sat up so I was pressed against his strong chest. He twisted my hair in one hand and pulled it back so I was almost staring at the ceiling. He bit into my neck just under my chin and I gasped. I heard a deep, appreciative rumbling in Eric's chest and I smiled and closed my eyes, happy I could give him such pleasure. Our bodies moved together a few more times, then we both found our release, shuddering and clinging to one another as we rode out the waves together.

We didn't move for a while, and Eric continued to sip from me. I realized he hadn't had real blood in many days, and I stroked his back and his arms, letting him know he could take as much as he needed. Finally I felt him lick the wounds, and I lowered my head to rest it on his shoulder.

We disentangled ourselves from one another and we lay together silently for several minutes, my head resting on Eric's chest and his arm around me. His hand was rubbing my arm idly, and I played with the curly hair on his chest.

"We're going to owe Russell a new clock, you know," I said after a moment and Eric chuckled softly and kissed my head.

"I'm certain he'll add it to our bill."

I propped myself up on one elbow and looked at Eric. His face was fuller, and had more color. I smiled.

"You look better."

"I feel better, too," he replied in a lusty tone, then became serious. "Did I take too much blood?"

"No, not at all," I said and I cuddled back down next to him. "It makes me feel good, knowing I'm able to help you." I traced a line with my finger down his chest. "I like knowing there is part of me in here, in you."

Eric took my hand and held it against his chest, not speaking. Something in the air seemed to change, and I got a flicker of emotion I didn't understand.

"Is something wrong?"

Eric still didn't respond, just picked up my hand and kissed it and placed it back against his chest.

"Eric?" I questioned, becoming concerned. "You're angry. Please...did I do something?"

"No, lover," he said gently. "You've done nothing wrong."

I looked up at him, trying to decide if I wanted to push him. The moment was so perfect, and I was so content just being near him I hated to disrupt a thing. But if Eric was upset, I wanted to know why. I wanted to help, if I could.

"Eric," I whispered once more, and I waited.

"I hate what Madden did to you," Eric said at last, and his voice was white hot. "It's killing me to think of him taking your blood, and laying his hands on you. I can almost picture him, feeding from you, forcing you...."

"Eric," I said, feeling my heart break. "Don't try to picture it, please."

"I should have been there."

I closed my eyes tight, and I fought back tears. He was still blaming himself, and I wondered if he still believed I blamed him, too.

"It's not your fault," I said, and I pushed myself up again so Eric could see my face. "I do not blame you, and I never will. And I want you to know something," I waited until I knew I had his full attention. "Victor didn't...have me...for long. Seconds, that's all it was."

Eric's face betrayed some relief, but then it clamped down again. "It was still far too long."

"True. And it was horrible," Eric's face twisted in pain, but I kept going. "But I can deal with it, as long as I know you aren't beating yourself up about it."

"Perhaps I will not be so angry after I kill him," Eric mused, and I just shook my head. I lay back down and Eric pulled me close.

"I've been selfish," he said after a moment. "I've spent more time thinking about ways to avenge your attack than in making certain you've healed from it."

"I'm perfectly fine," I assured him. "I told you, Pam healed me. Plus, I still had a lot of your blood in me, too."

Eric was quiet for a time. "That isn't what I meant," he said. "I hate thinking that Victor is up here somewhere." He touched my forehead with a fingertip. "I hate thinking I might never be able to fully banish him from our lives."

I smiled at my Viking, touched by his concern for my mental well-being. He was full of surprises.

"Eric honey, I want you to listen to me, because it's very important." He looked at me intently and I continued. "You know what happened to me when I was a child. My Great Uncle?"

Eric didn't speak, but I could tell from the look on his face he well remembered.

"When I moved in with Gran, after she found out what happened to me, she sent me to some really good counselors. They were great people and helped me as much as they could. But the thing that helped the most was that I could hear their thoughts. When they told me it wasn't my fault, I _knew_ it was the truth. I could hear in their heads how much they wanted to help me, how much they wanted me to be able to move on and have a good life. I remember not wanting to disappoint them."

I paused, my mind going back in time for a moment. Eric remained thoughtfully silent.

"And I also remember hearing things about other kids they worked with; things that happened that were so terrible it gave me nightmares. I've thought a lot about it, and I really think part of the reason I'm able to even function in this world is because of those counselors. They were wonderful, and honest in both their words and thoughts. Hearing them gave me a perspective most people never get, and it gave me strength and purpose."

I kissed Eric gently and looked him right in the eyes.

"This is why Victor Madden will never be able to hide up here," and I tapped my head. "I will think about him only when I have to, but he will never be in my head against my will. I won't allow him to have that power over me. And when you kill him - and I know you will kill him, baby - I will never think about him again."

Eric looked at me with something akin to astonishment. He held me close and nestled his face in my hair.

"How is it that fate has deemed me worthy of a gift such as you?" He sounded completely sincere in the question, and I had to smile. "I really can't believe my luck."

"Your luck?" I asked.

"In finding you. I said this to you once before, do you remember?"

"I remember," I whispered. "But that was when you were cursed, and you actually _were_ lucky I found you. Now...well, I'm more trouble than I'm worth, don't you think?"

"Hardly," Eric said, and he frowned at me. "I love being with you. I meant it when I said you have made me happier than I have been in hundreds of years. I enjoy knowing you're mine, knowing no one else will ever have you."

I smiled, and snuggled closer to him. It was a good answer.

"Do I make you happy, Sookie?" Eric asked, and the question surprised me.

"Of course you do," I said instantly, but then wondered at my own answer. I did enjoy Eric, I even loved him, I was sure of that now. But there were still issues between us, large issues we had yet to discuss. There had simply been so much drama since that night he came to see me at my house, so we hadn't had a chance to really discuss them.

"You sound uncertain," Eric said, and he readjusted his position a little so he could look at me. "And you feel anxious. What is this about, my lover?"

"There are just some things I'm confused about is all. There are things I'm not sure I understand about us." I took a finger and pointed back and forth between us. "I'm not sure what we are to one another, exactly."

Eric pushed himself up to a sitting position, and I propped myself up on an elbow to look at him.

"What are you not understanding," Eric said, and he looked suspicious. "You're mine."

"Right," I said slowly, and I sat up beside Eric, pulling the sheet up under my arms. "I got that part. But does that mean you are mine, too? Or are you expecting this to just go one way?"

"Our responsibilities are different," Eric said. "I will protect you, and care for you. I will provide for you..."

"Will you be faithful to me?" I asked him directly, and Eric just looked at me for a long moment. Too long.

"This is your concern?" he finally asked.

"Yes, one of them." It upset me I even had to ask him about this. With anyone else I would have thought fidelity was a given, but with Eric - Mr. January himself - I wasn't sure what his expectations were.

"Perhaps I owe you an apology," Eric said, and he acted like the words left a bad taste in his mouth. "I guess I didn't make myself as clear as I should have the night you agreed to be my woman."

I closed my eyes, dreading what was coming, then I heard Eric burst into laughter and my eyes snapped open.

"No wonder you fought me so hard," Eric said, still laughing. "You thought I was expecting you to be faithful to me, while I took on other bedmates?"

I opened my mouth, closed it again. Eric laughed harder, and pulled me into his arms.

"I guess I should be offended that you think so little of me."

Oh, gack! I hated those moments, the ones when you realize you had been way off the mark about someone.

"I guess," I said softly. "I actually owe you the apology. I didn't mean to imply that you were...."

"A horny dog?" Eric finished, smiling.

Okay, those weren't going to be my exact words, but it was close enough.

"I can't blame you, lover," Eric said. "The first time we met I admitted to having sex with a woman you knew."

"And the second time I saw you, you were all over Ginger," I reminded him,

Eric scowled. He probably didn't think I remembered that.

"Yes," he admitted. "I'm also sure my reputation at Fangtasia has made it's way to your ears."

"You can say that," I admitted softly. "I just can't stand the idea of calling you some night at the club, and having Clancy tell me you're busy having dinner." I made a face, and turned away. "I don't think I could handle that. I _know_ I couldn't."

"Sookie?" Eric said softly, and I turned back to look at him.

"In the matter of fidelity, I am yours, just as you are mine." He sounded pretty darn firm, and I believed him. I breathed out a long sigh, and I felt tension leave my body.

"There are other concerns?" Eric asked, and I shook my head.

"That was the big one."

Eric's hands were starting to move on me again, and I knew he was about ready for round two. I didn't mind a bit, in fact I was just as ready as he was. I wiggled against him and let my hands roam under the blankets, which caused him to do a wiggling of his own.

"_My_ Eric," I whispered into his chest, and he smiled hugely.

He rolled me onto my back and kissed my face and said something once more in that beautiful language of his.

"What are you saying? Really?"

He chuckled. "You already asked me that once."

"And you never answered."

"Oh, I thought I did," he said in a teasing voice. "Perhaps I need to show you again."

His lips found mine and his hands continued to caress my body. I closed my eyes and luxuriated in the feel of him and in the smell of him. When he entered me again, I drifted away with the sensations, seeing flashes of gold and red light behind my eyes. Then, without a warning, I felt the cold touch of Eric's mind enter my consciousness. My eyes flew open, and my heartbeat increased, and I gripped Eric's strong back while he moved inside me, oblivious to the fact his mind was open to me.

I didn't hear words, not specifically. Instead I saw images flash in his head. I saw myself there in his mind, and it was like I was looking in a mirror, though the angle was different, as if I was looking up. I realized it was myself as Eric sees me from his great height. I looked so small, and I looked scared. Then the image was obscured by a muted darkness, and I saw my head turn to the side. I heard words then, random and fleeting, in Eric's mind...._beautiful_..._protect... mine...._ And then there was blood - my own blood - and I understood Eric was thinking about a time he had fed from me.

It was so familiar, but also so different from Eric's perspective. Then Eric's mind flashed again and I saw a knife appear in the vision, and I finally knew where we were in his thoughts. Eric was thinking back to Rhodes, back to the night he and I had been forced to enter into our blood bond- a bond I now cherished, but at the time loathed.

And then as quickly as it had opened to me, Eric's mind closed down. I was briefly saddened, but also strangely touched by my glimpse into my lover's mind. It had only lasted a few seconds, but it was enough to thrill me to my core. Of all the many, many things that could have been going on in Eric's head...he could have been thinking about my breasts, or my butt, or just his own pleasure or whatever else men think about during sex. But instead he was remembering the moment we forged our blood bond.

Our love-making became more urgent then, our movements more intense, and when we finally found our completion I was truly beyond the need for words, in English or any other language. I _felt_ loved, and that was enough for now.

_- To be continued_

_Thanks to my wonderful Beta (adore you!) and to the most supportive bunch of readers ever! xoxo_


	24. Chapter 24

_**A/N As we all know, the wonderful Charlaine Harris presented us with book 9 this week. I had some decisions to make in regards to this story, and in the end I decided to just let it roll the way it was originally sketched out in my little (very worn out) notebook. There will be shades of book 9 in the upcoming chapters, but I just wanted to make it clear (and apologize) that this story will not be following the canon of the series after book 8. I'll shut up now. :D**_

**Know Thyself**

**Chapter Twenty Four**

I was blissfully happy and sated to the point of being almost unable to control my movements. Eric was still lying on top of me, nuzzling his face into my neck, and I let my hands move along his back in an absent sort of way. We were still joined, and I brought one leg up a little, placing my foot flat on the mattress and pressing my thigh against Eric's hip.

I released a long sigh, just enjoying our connection. He was so much larger than I, but it didn't matter when we were together; we managed to make it work without even trying. But right then I wished there was a way to pull every part of Eric into myself. It was a strange feeling, but I swear I felt like I couldn't get him close enough to me, even though right then we were about as close as a man and woman could get.

Eric pushed up and looked down at me. His blue eyes were shining. I had the strongest compulsion just then to tell him again that I loved him, but I fought it back. Not because it wasn't true, but because I had already said the words once and I knew he hadn't forgotten. I figured the proverbial ball was in his court now; if he felt the same, he could tell me if he wanted to, right? It may have been a childish thing, a silly battle of wills, but it made me feel better about myself. I was going to be an equal in this new and complicated relationship of ours, not some silly love struck girl that, as my Gran would say, wore her heart on her sleeve. It was _his turn_. I'd wait. I smiled up at my vampire.

"Are you hungry?" he asked me.

Okay, those weren't exactly the words I'd liked to have heard after sex. But Eric was ever practical, and apparently observant. I hadn't eaten a bite since I'd left Bon Temps.

"I am, actually," I replied, and Eric kissed me one last time before rolling off of me with a contended little noise.

I sat up slowly, stretching a bit. I climbed out of bed, located the pretty green robe on the floor and slipped it on. Russell said he'd left some fruit up here for me and I found it quickly on a silver serving platter, complete with a lid. I knew it wasn't _real_ silver, obviously, but it was a good fake. There was also a big pitcher of ice-water and a yellow tinted glass left for me. I poured myself some, drank it down quickly, then re-filled.

I opened up the lid on the platter and my hunger, which had been staved off by everything that had happened, instantly bombarded me when I looked at the selection of ripe fruit. I had strawberries, banana slices, several kinds of melons, and grapes. There was a little fork lying atop some napkins nearby and I picked it up and poked at a piece of melon and popped it into my mouth. Oh, wow, was it ever good! I picked up the whole platter and my ice water, and headed back to the bed and sat down cross legged next to Eric, who was propped up against the headboard and watching me silently while I ate.

"Good?" he asked me.

"Mmmhmm," I answered, biting into a deliciously juicy piece of cantaloupe. I knew lot of this fruit was out of season, but Russell, God bless him, had found it somewhere. He knew how to keep his humans happy, yes indeed.

Eric got up and pulled on the other robe. His hair had still been damp when we started our frolicking, and it had dried in wavy rat tails that hung around his face and down his back. He looked positively beautiful, and I found I couldn't keep my eyes off him while he walked across the room and rummaged through the desk drawers. When he turned back to me, he was holding a pen and a small notebook, and he scribbled something hastily on a page.

"I'm going to check on Bill and the young one," Eric told me, and I held up my free hand while I took a big drink of ice water. A little liquid spilled down my chin and I wiped it off.

"I'll walk with you. I need to use the bathroom."

I briefly considered changing back into my clothes, but then disregarded the idea. The robe was very conservative in style and didn't show a lot of skin, so I figured it would be decent enough to wear around the mansion. As soon as we opened the door, the music from downstairs could be heard once more, and the walls were almost vibrating. I grimaced. For a brief while, Eric and I had been in our own little world, and now we were tossed back into reality.

Eric and I headed down the hall, and he kept going while I popped into the bathroom and took care of business. I looked in the mirror, and smiled at my glowing reflection. I definitely looked like a woman that had been well taken care of. I had left my brush in the bathroom earlier, so I picked it up and ran it through my hair a bit and shook it out so it fell full and soft over my shoulders.

I continued down to Bill's room and stood in the doorway. Bill was awake, sitting on the edge of the bed and drinking a True Blood. He looked a thousand times better; his shirt was off, and the horrific slice on his chest looked to be in the final stages of healing. His color was better, too. He was talking to Eric, who was writing some information down in the little notebook he acquired. When Bill noticed me, he stopped talking and looked me up and down. His nostrils flared. I knew I smelled of Eric and I smelled of sex, but there was nothing I could do about that.

"You look much better," I commented, and I gave Bill a heartfelt smile.

"I'm getting there," Bill answered, then he turned back to Eric. "Ten and a half," he said and Eric jotted down that information.

"Sookie, do you have any clothes?" Eric asked me, and I frowned.

"I brought just a few things; all jeans and sweatshirts."

Eric nodded. "What size do you wear?"

I cringed. Does any woman really want to announce her dress size to a room full of people? But this wasn't really the time to worry about something like that.

"Eight or a ten," I answered honestly. "Depending on the style."

Eric nodded and turned to Yasuka, who was still in the same spot we'd left her, engaged in something on the computer. Lucas had already gone.

"What size do you wear?"

Yasuka looked a little confused, but then answered by saying she wore a size five. Eric started to write it down but I stopped him.

"There's no way she's a five," I said. "Maybe sizes are different in Japan. If I had to guess, she is about a two here." I walked over and placed my foot against hers. "She probably wears a size 6. No, six and a half shoe."

"Good enough," Eric said. "I'm going to go find Russell and see if we can manage getting some fresh clothes. We won't be going to Nevada in rags."

Eric walked out of the room then, pausing for just a moment when he stepped around me. His hand brushed against me and I felt electricity spark between us, and a little throb down below teased me. I almost laughed at myself. I knew I was still feeling the effects of the vampire blood in my body, which always seems to put my libido into overdrive, but jeez louise!

I noticed there were several empty bottles of True Blood lying around the room and I peeked over at Yasuka to find her looking at me with her fangs partially out. I knew young vampires required more blood, and I also had to wonder if Izo possibly withheld it from the poor girl as a form of punishment. She was doing very well in controlling herself - at least by my estimation - but her eyes betrayed her hunger. I instinctively moved a little closer to Bill, and sat down on the end of the bed facing him.

"You're going to Nevada with us?" I asked him, and he regarded me for a long moment.

"Eric offered to find me passage home, but after he explained the situation, I knew I wanted to be there. I can be a witness if necessary."

"A witness," I repeated quietly. Sounded formal. I didn't like that one bit.

"Eric hasn't told me anything about what's going to happen," I said, at once feeling glad I had someone to talk to about things, but also feeling odd that the someone was Bill. "I'm worried."

"I wish I could tell you not to be," Bill stated coolly. "The fact is, Victor has made a serious charge against you, and unless you or Eric flat out admit to what he's alleging..."

"And we won't," I stated firmly, hoping I was indeed speaking for Eric.

"...then it really comes down to a matter of who is most believable. And Victor has many friends in Nevada."

"But Victor broke the King's law, right? When he attacked me? I'm under his protection. And isn't one of your traditions that you aren't supposed to...." I trailed off, suddenly embarrassed.

"That we aren't supposed to feed from a human that belongs to another?" Bill finished for me. To his credit, he managed a small smile. "Yes. Victor could suffer for that, since Eric had claimed you as his. But if Victor can prove - or at least make a convincing argument - that you have been working with Eric, unbeknownst to the King, by reading the minds of vampires, then his offense in attacking you would be dismissed as justified."

"What he did to me would be _justified?_" I'm sure I looked horrified at the words, and frightened. Bill touched my hand briefly.

"I'm not sure how to explain it to you Sookie. You're human, an offense against you is....it's like a misdemeanor. What Eric is being accused of is more like a class A felony. But I will stand up as witness for you. And don't underestimate Eric. A vampire doesn't live as long as he has without learning how to manipulate the system."

I didn't doubt that at all. I took a deep breath and tried to clear my head. There were a million things spinning in my brain, and I was feeling completely overwhelmed. I looked down and saw Bill's hand lying atop mine, and it felt comforting and familiar. I appreciated that, very much.

"Thank you for saving my life," I whispered. "Thanks for helping find Eric, and for killing Izo."

"You never have to thank me for keeping you safe," Bill said, and I smiled gently. I knew he meant every word.

"How did you do it, Sookie?" He asked me after a time.

I looked at my ex and frowned. "How did I do what?"

"I saw what happened when Izo was coming for you. You stopped him somehow. It looked like he ran into an invisible wall."

I turned my eyes down, not sure what to say. I had barely had a moment to even process the things Claudine had told me about my essential spark and the curious Fae magic I had tapped in to. I didn't understand it fully myself, and I didn't have the first clue how to explain to anyone else.

"It's nothing," I said unconvincingly, and I pulled my hand out from under Bill's.

"It doesn't sound like 'nothing'," Eric's voice said, and I whipped me head up to see him standing in the doorway. He was holding a pack of True Blood and looking unhappy. He sat the blood down in front of Yasuka who immediately grabbed one. Eric handed another to Bill, who took it with a nod.

I realized I had the undivided attention of two very strong-willed vampires, and I closed my eyes in resignation.

"There's really not much to tell," I insisted.

"You said Izo hit an invisible wall?" Eric asked Bill.

"Yes. One second he was going for Sookie, the next he was flat on his back." Bill eyed me curiously. "When Izo asked her what she did, she told him it was Fae magic."

Eric's eyebrows shot up, he stared at me intently and made a 'come on, lets hear the rest' gesture with his hand. Oh, _hell_.

"Okay," I said, breathing out heavily. Then I started explaining, as much as I knew, which wasn't a lot. I told then how I accidentally used the strange magic to get Victor away from me, and how I managed it again during the fight with Izo. When I was done, Bill was looking very thoughtful, and Eric was not. My blood bonded lover looked mighty displeased.

"You were going to keep this from me?" he asked.

"No!" I said, feeling a little riled he was calling me out in front of Bill. "I was going to tell you, I just haven't had a chance. Besides, it's really not that big of a deal."

Eric just stared at me for a long time, like he was trying to see something behind my eyes. I met his stare solidly. Finally Bill stood up and cleared his throat.

"Eric, what did Russell say about the clothing situation?"

I could have kissed Bill just then. As it was, I gave him what I hoped was my most grateful smile.

Eric pulled his eyes away from me. "He will be sending one of his people out tomorrow to pick up some things for us. We'll be billed, of course."

"Of course."

"Eric," a soft, tentative voice said from behind us, and we all turned to Yasuka.

"Can I have shower tonight?"

I was still amazed at how well she spoke English. I wondered if it was part of her school curriculum, or if she learned from a family member, or from movies.

"You may," Eric told her.

"I can take charge of her," Bill offered, and Yasuka looked down. "You have to prepare for the trial. And I see she has already familiarized herself with my computer." There was a slight hint of accusation in his voice.

"That was my idea," I said instantly. "I didn't want her to get bored."

"I not break anything," Yasuka piped up, excited. "I know this computer. Dude, you have a Dell!"

Bill and I chuckled a little, but Eric wasn't getting the joke. I figured I'd explain later.

"I suppose there's no harm done. Everything important is protected by password," Bill said.

"One of Russell's people will be coming for us before dawn," Eric stated. "He has guest accommodations in the lower level."

I winced to myself. Guest coffins. I wondered how that worked; if they changed the lining in between uses.

"I'm waiting on a call," Eric said and he moved toward the door. He paused and cast his eyes on Yasuka. "You will listen to Bill and obey him."

"Yes, Eric," she said obediently, but then I saw something flash across her face, a look I recognized instantly. I recalled what Eric had told me about Izo and why he had turned the young girl, what he forced her to do. I stepped very close to her, and smiled reassuringly.

"Bill won't hurt you," I said softly. "I promise."

Relief flooded her face, and I turned to my ex.

"Izo...." I didn't have to finish. Bill nodded without expression, and I knew he understood.

"You know where I'll be if anything happens," Eric stated, and he placed his hand on my back while we made our way back to our own room. He shut the door, then turned to me and I could tell by the look on his face our earlier conversation wasn't over.

"Did Claudine tell you anything else?" He asked.

"About my spark? No."

"About Niall's expectations perhaps?"

I sat on the end of the bed and cast my eyes down to my feet. How could I look Eric in the face and tell him my Great-Grandfather was hoping to make me a factory for little Fae? But when I looked up, I realized I didn't have to.

"I suspected that might have been the case when he approached me," Eric said in an emotionless voice. "His race has been slowly dying for centuries. And Niall isn't one to involve himself with anyone, human or otherwise, unless they are of some benefit to him."

The hurt must have shown on my face, and the anger, because Eric hurried to explain. Back-peddle, more accurately.

"The Fae think a lot of themselves."

"More than they have a right to," I said hotly. "I remember. He's still my family, Eric."

"What was your answer?" He asked me directly, and my eyes found my feet again.

"I told Claudine to tell Niall I would consider it...."

I stopped when I felt a powerful surge of emotion roll off of Eric. When I looked up, he was right in front of me, having crossed the room at vampire speed. He put his hands on my shoulders and leaned down. His eyes were like chunks of ice.

"You will _not_ consider it," he said, and he squeezed my shoulders until it hurt. "You are mine, and mine alone. I will not share."

"You're hurting me," I said, and he immediately loosened his grip. "And you didn't let me finish!"

I stood up and faced Eric, angry and hurt by his reaction. "I said I'd _consider _it, in exchange for Niall backing off. He was going to take out Victor."

"Victor needs to be taken out," Eric growled.

"It's not worth starting a war!" I was struggling to keep my voice down, but if we had been anywhere else I would have been yelling. "If Niall killed Victor, what would happen? Be honest."

Eric's nose flared and he looked away. "I don't know."

"Yes you do," I challenged him. "Claudine told me about the last time the Fae and the vamps went at it, and it started just like this - a vengeance killing. She told me there were a lot of deaths on both sides. I won't let people I love kill one another off, not over me."

"So your solution was to offer yourself to the Fae; to be a breeder for them?"

I came very close to saying something I knew I'd regret later. Instead, I took a step back, physically and mentally. I tried to look at things from Eric's perspective and when I did, I could see why he would be upset. I knew I had no intention of hopping into bed with someone else, but Eric didn't. And the fact I had even made the offer, even as a ruse, cut Eric like a knife. I wondered how much was pride, and how much was...something else.

"I have not offered myself to _anyone,_" I said more gently. "I belong to you. Maybe it was a mistake to say what I did, but I was hurting, and I was scared and it was the best I could do at the time." I paused, touched Eric's arm. "I'm sorry if I upset you. But I'm not sorry if I prevented a fight. I can't bear to think of you, or Claudine, or Claude, or Pam getting killed over my mess."

Eric looked down at me, and I saw and felt his rage start to slip away. He took me in his arms after a time.

"I will speak to Niall myself," Eric said absently, like he wasn't really talking to me. "I will make sure he knows this matter is closed. There are some lines even the damn Faeries won't cross."

I wanted to ask him what he meant by that, but then the phone rang. Eric let me go and answered.

"Northman," he said and he listened to whomever was on the other end for a long, long time. He said 'yes' and 'no' a few times, and once again I felt myself wishing I had vampire hearing.

"I don't care what it takes," Eric said. "Tell Edusai I need him in Nevada by ten tomorrow night."

I furrowed my eyebrows, trying to remember. I knew that name from somewhere.

Another substantial pause. "I hope it won't come to that, but we have to cover all the bases." More silence, and Eric glanced at me. "I will tell her," he said slowly. "You've done well. I will call you as soon as I know something. If you don't hear from me, you will know what happened." Another, shorter pause. "And to you."

Eric clicked off the phone and turned to me with an odd expression.

"Pam wishes me to remind you of a conversation you and she had when she stayed at your house. She asked me to tell you to remember you have a choice."

I tilted my head in confusion for a moment, trying to recall. It sounded so familiar, but I just couldn't place the conversation. I shrugged.

"I'm sure it will come to me," I said, then I did remember something.

"Were you talking about Baako Edusai? The witch?"

Eric's eyes went wide, then narrowed. "You know him?"

"No, but I know _of_ him. Amelia told me a little about him. I guess she met him a few weeks ago in New Orleans. He's a spellbinder, or something like that."

"Yes, he is," Eric said slowly, still eyeing me carefully.

"Why do you need him to come to Nevada?" I asked. I honestly couldn't begin to imagine what purpose this legendary witch extraordinaire could serve.

"I don't know that I will need him at all," Eric said, which wasn't really answering the question, and I filed that away in the 'things that make you go Hmmm' section of my brain.

Eric walked over and knelt down in front of me and placed both my hands in his. He leaned in very close, whispered right in my ear. I felt a shiver run the length of my spine. Eric noticed my reaction and I felt him smile.

"There are things I need to explain to you, my lover, but this is not the right place. Do you understand?"

I leaned back, just a bit. Was Eric trying to tell me he didn't trust Russell? Did he think the room was bugged? I squeezed my eyes shut. If he thought that was the case, I wish he would have told me earlier. I might have tried to be a little quieter. Maybe.

"I understand," I whispered back.

"I will explain everything to you soon enough."

I got a very uneasy feeling at those words, but I tried to swallow it down. I trusted Eric, as much as I trusted anyone. He was keeping something from me, that was pretty clear; his deception nearly sang out from our blood bond. But then of course, I was keeping a secret from him, too; I hadn't mentioned the brief glimpse into his mind earlier when we were making love. So I guess we were sort of even in the total disclosure game.

Eric started to pull back, but I held onto him and looked him right in the face.

"Tell me what will happen if Victor wins tomorrow? If they believe him?"

Eric was very still and very silent for a long while.

"I need to know," I said very softly, and I saw that Eric agreed with me.

"I will be publicly staked, and you will be drained."

I sucked in a sharp breath and clapped my hand over my mouth. My heart rate sped up and I had the most powerful urge to run, fast and far. Eric's strong hands held me firm.

"We need to leave," I said, and I started to get up from the bed. "We can't go to Nevada. We can't...."

I was on the verge of a full blown panic attack as the reality of what we were facing came crashing down on me. I had suspected, of course, but hearing the words, said so calmly, so easily, took my anxiety to a whole other level. I knew it sounded cliche' even as I said the words in my head, but Jesus help me, I really didn't want to die.

"You wish to run?" Eric asked me, and I looked up at him. "I'll take you anywhere you want to go." He held my forearms with his hands and looked into my eyes. I felt a wave of calm wash through me, and my heart actually seemed to slow.

"But we'll never be free, my lover," Eric continued in a soft voice. "We will always be looking over our shoulder. Is this the life you want?"

A big part of me was ready to say 'yes'.

"I'm scared," I whispered, and Eric placed his forehead against mine when he spoke.

"I won't leave you. I won't fail you."

We just stood like that together for a long time. With Eric's powerful presence near me, and his strong hands holding me like an anchor, I felt my fear start to evaporate, and my anxiety became manageable. I knew I couldn't run away; it would be useless. We had to deal with this, once and for all. I was still scared, but resolve had taken it's place as the over-riding emotion within me.

"So how will this work," I asked, when I was certain I could speak without my voice shaking. "Will it be like Sophie Anne's trial?"

Eric stepped back and sat on the edge of the bed. He pulled me into his lap, and I happily curled myself into his chest. He stroked my back.

"Not exactly," he answered. "The Ancient Pythoness will not be there. She generally only resides over matters involving Kingdoms, like with Sophie Anne's trial."

"The good silver," I whispered, and Eric chuckled.

"More than likely, Felipe' will have requested a panel of impartial observers to come and cast judgment."

"Impartial?" I asked skeptically.

"The law states it must be so. Of course, laws can be twisted. I truly have no idea what we might find in Nevada. I have just barely started getting to know the new regime. There are varying degrees of formality in these things. I can only hope that Felipe' is one that takes our laws seriously."

"You think we can win?" I asked tentatively.

"If I am allowed a fair hearing, yes; the chances are good. Pam has contacted the demon lawyer Cataliades. He should be meeting us in Nevada."

I sat up, and my hopes soared. Mr. Cataliades always struck me as a very smart man, well versed in his field. I knew his help would be invaluable.

"Please think no more about this, my lover" Eric said, and he kissed me lightly. "It's my place to worry about the trial."

"And what is my place?" I asked, and Eric raised one eyebrow. I knew that look.

In one smooth motion Eric had me off his lap and lying on the bed. He hovered over me and his hand moved to untie my robe. He pushed it open and his eyes roamed over my body.

"I can't get enough of you," he said, and he bent his head to take my nipple in his mouth. I made a happy noise and reached one hand up and placed it on the back of his head, grasping his hair. He moved to the other breast, and I started to move, arching my back in pleasure.

A light knock on the door made me jump, and Eric growled something I didn't understand. He leapt from the bed, and I sat up, putting my robe back to rights. Eric opened the door, and Bill was standing there, looking uncomfortable to an extent that was almost funny. I knew it had to be something urgent or Bill would never have put himself in this position.

"Bill," Eric greeted him, and I have to give Eric credit; his voice was normal, not a trace of annoyance. He appeared to take Bill's presence seriously.

Bill looked past Eric, met my eyes for an instant, and then he turned back to his Sheriff.

"I apologize for the interruption, but I have something I need to show you."

"Alright." Eric turned to me. "I'll return as soon as I can."

I nodded, curious, but not curious enough to ask to accompany him. As soon as he shut the door, I hopped up and found the tray of fruit again and dug in, happy no one was watching me this time. My lust faded rapidly as I tasted the ripe strawberries and grapes. I smiled to myself. Maybe the link between sex and feeding wasn't exclusive to vampires.

I'm ashamed to say I ate most every single piece of fruit on the tray. I drank a glass of ice water, and wandered around the room while I waited. And waited. Finally, curiosity got the best of me, and I opened the door and peeked into the hall. I stepped out quietly, then berated myself. Why did I feel the need to sneak, anyway? Whatever they were discussing down there in Bill's room concerned me, too. Or at least I assumed it had something to do with the trial.

I marched down the hall, making a quick stop in the bathroom for good measure. As soon as I got close to Bill's door it opened, and Eric pulled me inside.

Bill and Yasuka were at the desk, and I caught a glimpse at Bill's laptop; it looked to have the Fellowship of the Sun web page pulled up. I felt a moment of horror, wondering if more attacks had occurred.

"Keep me advised on your progress," Eric said to Bill. Apparently they were just finishing up with whatever they were discussing.

Bill nodded his head, then turned back to the computer and said something in Japanese to Yasuka and she answered.

"Let's go," Eric said quietly, and he ushered me from the room.

"What was that about?" I asked, looking up. "You were gone a long time."

"Bill may have found a lead involving the attacks in Louisiana."

I had a very strange feeling there was more to it than that, but I didn't press the issue. Mainly because I simply wasn't given the chance.

Eric barely had the door to our room shut behind us before he had me in his arms, kissing me relentlessly. One hand untied my robe, then he carried me to the bed and we both fell together in a tangle of sheets and robes and arms and legs.

"I can't get enough of you," he said again as his lips moved from my face to my neck and his hand stroked the curve of my hip. My hands played in his hair, and I obligingly craned my head back to give him better access. My legs parted of their own accord and a deep throbbing caused my pelvis to start rocking.

We joined again, one final time before I knew dawn would come to take my Viking away from me for the day. We moved together effortlessly, as if we were one entity, an extension of one another.

"My Sookie," Eric whispered, over and over. He spoke to me in his ancient language as well, and the words sounded like music. I closed my eyes and smiled.

And when Eric bit, just a small wound on my breast, we went over the edge together, clinging to one another like our very lives depended on it.

We lay together for a long time after that. We talked, but it wasn't like we had to talk to fill the silence. Eric surprised me by asking me to tell him my happiest memory from childhood, and I did. I asked him to tell me all the places he's lived, and the list was beyond imagining.

It was a surreal moment, when I realized I was actually lying there in bed with a gorgeous creature that had walked the earth for more than one thousand years. It boggled my mind when I really let myself consider the immensity of the time that had passed for him. I held him closer.

"I have to go," he said finally, and he didn't sound any happier about it than I felt.

"So soon?" I asked. It was still nearly an hour before sunrise.

"Yes. I need to speak to Bill again, and I need to talk with Russell about our flight plans. Then I'll take shelter."

"Are you sure you'll be safe?" I asked him as he kissed my forehead.

"I'll be quite safe."

He got up and wrapped the robe around himself, then leaned down over me and inhaled deeply several times. He smiled.

"You smell of me," he said. "I like that."

I reached up and pulled his face down and kissed him gently.

"I'll miss you."

He touched my face, traced one finger down my cheek.

"I won't be far. Sleep well, my lover."

Then he was gone, and I was alone. I could still feel him, and that was a great comfort. I reached over and took the pillow Eric had been using and pressed my face into it. I tried to sleep- I wanted to sleep - but it was hard.

Tomorrow was going to be a very long night.

_To be continued_

_I didn't get all my thank you notes out last time, and I feel terrible about that! So this is a belated 'thank you' to all my wonderful readers and reviewers. And of course I give flowers to my Beta, the lovely Meadows, who saves me from myself every chapter!_


	25. Chapter 25

**Know Thyself**

**Chapter Twenty Five**

Sleep was elusive, so I lay in the big bed just staring at the ceiling for a long while after Eric left. I briefly worried about being alone in the room, but pushed those fears aside much faster than I normally would. I knew Eric would not have left me alone if he feared for my safety, and also I just didn't believe the King would harm me, or allow one of his minions to do so, either. Perhaps it was naive' and foolish, but there was just something about Russell that made me - if not trust him, exactly - not fear him the way prudence would generally demand. I wondered if it was his gift; the way he could identify with and understand humans.

As soon as Eric had walked from the room, I missed him instantly and completely in a way bordering on madness. I even had to fight the urge to run after him and beg him to let me stay with him for the day, which was ridiculous, of course. I really and truly didn't want to sleep in a coffin; the very thought of it made me shudder. I also didn't think Eric would want me with him while he was in his daytime coma. But I simply hated to be alone with my thoughts.

Despite my brief moments of bravery and confidence, the truth was that I was terrified about what tomorrow would bring. Whether it was the blood bond, or my love for him, or just his ability to always appear in control of any situation, I had been sub-consciously leaning on Eric for strength. Now that he was away from me, I felt my anxiety and fear seeping back into my brain.

I could feel Eric inside me, could feel his presence and our bond humming away. That helped until I remembered, with sudden shame, that he could also feel me. I closed my eyes, regulated my breathing, and focused on calming myself. I didn't want to disrupt Eric with my worrying when I knew he was doing everything in his power to figure out a solution for us. But it was insanely hard _not_ to worry at this point.

Logically, I knew there was no way around the spectacular mess I had created. I had zero doubt that if Felipe' De Castro wanted me, he would get me, and no amount of running, or pleading would change that. I thought back to my glimpse inside Eric's head so long ago, when he considered threatening me or my loved ones to get me to comply with his wishes. The only thing that held him back was his desire to keep his dealings with humans as aboveboard as possible.

I doubted the King, or Victor, really cared about that.

Eric said he would run with me, if that's what I wanted. But on the heels of that idea, all manner of dreadful scenarios started to spring up in my head. I pictured Sam, or Amelia, or my brother being taken to be used as leverage against me if I dared tried to run. I saw Pam in silver chains, being tortured to ascertain if she knew where Eric and I had gone. I squeezed my eyes shut against the images.

No, Eric was right. We had to go to Nevada and end this, one way or another.

Once I had resolved the situation - again - in my head; once I knew there was no other viable option, I was able to relax enough to sleep. It was a fitful sleep but, mercifully, I didn't dream.

I awoke many hours later with that weird, disoriented feeling you get when you don't remember right away where you are. I rubbed my eyes and blinked, then pushed myself up in the bed. I took a moment to do a mental inventory, and was relieved to find I actually felt pretty good, despite my restless sleep. Then I checked the bond, and smiled with profound relief when I felt Eric's drowsy presence somewhere close by. He was safe, and obviously in his daytime slumber.

I had woken up unharmed, and Eric was still okay. Two of my worries for the day were already down. I hoped my luck held out.

I instinctively looked at the clock to check the time, and giggled a little when I saw it's shattered remains on the end table. I shook my head as I slipped out of the bed. I found the green robe and gathered up the things I needed for a shower and headed for the door. I had barely begun to turn the knob on the door when it was jerked open roughly and I was pulled forward along with it.

I stumbled, trying to regain my balance and felt a strong grip on my upper arm. I looked over in surprise, and found myself staring at a woman's face. I looked her up and down, and automatically reached into her head. She was unmistakably human, maybe forty five years old, with short cropped, spiky, dark hair and large almond eyes. She was wearing a tight black tank top, black and grey military camouflage pants and black boots. There was a gun in a holster on her right hip. She was my height, but far more muscular. Her grip on my arm was like steel.

"Sookie Stackhouse," she said, and she wasn't asking a question. "My name is Liddy Cornwell. I am under orders to escort you until sundown."

"Escort me where?" I asked. She hadn't let go of my arm yet and it was becoming uncomfortable. I pulled back a little and she released me.

"Wherever you need to go, within reason." She looked at the items in my hands. "I assume you require use of the bathroom facilities?"

"Uh, yeah," I said and she immediately turned and started down the hall. I followed her, trying to get on her from her thoughts, but she had an unusually private mind.

"What are you protecting me from?" I asked when we reached the bathroom and Liddy raised her eyes a fraction.

"I'm not protecting you from anything," she said, sounding almost amused. "My job is to protect the King and his sleeping guests from you."

"Ah," I said, because there wasn't much else I could say.

"I'll be waiting for you when you're finished," Liddy said, and I had no doubt she would be.

"Oh!" I said, just before I closed the door. "Do you know what time it is?"

"Fifteen hundred hours," she replied without looking at her watch. She must have seen the calculating look on my face. "Three p.m," she explained, and I thanked her.

While I showered and cleaned up, I took a few minutes to appreciate the extra security Russell had imposed. The last time I was here, I was able to walk right out of the mansion without seeing a single soul; I could have made off with the Edgington family jewels if I had wanted too. I wondered if Russell had just learned his lesson after the embarrassing Charles Twinning episode, or if something deeper lay under the protection. Not that it really mattered, but it gave me something to think on instead of the upcoming trial.

I washed and dried my hair, and found a clip in one of the drawers in the bathroom that I used it to pull my hair back into a sort of improvised french roll. I dabbed on a little make-up and decided I looked pretty good for a woman that might be going to die in a few hours.

As promised, Liddy was waiting just outside the door when I exited, but she now had a large garment bag hung over her arm, and a big plastic bag with a store name I didn't recognize was siting on the floor.

"Clothing," she said, and shoved the items at me.

Liddy was definitely not a big talker.

I held everything in my arms, surprised at the heft, and followed my escort back to the bedroom. I made up the bed quickly, and unzipped the garment bag, and soon understood why it was so heavy. It didn't just contain my clothes, but also Eric's and Bill's and Yasuka's. Fortunately, we were all very different size-wise, so it wasn't hard to separate everything. Eric's outfit was dark with a midnight blue shirt, and I couldn't wait to see him in it. Enclosed in the large plastic store bag were four pair of shoes, socks and stocking.

The clothes were what could be called 'business casual', of good quality, and I was pleased to see whoever did the shopping decided against buying me a dress and instead opted for an attractive looking pant suit. Everything fit fine, including the shoes.

I sat on the bed in my new outfit and did absolutely nothing for a good while. One of my legs started to bounce the way it sometimes did when I was nervous, and I chuckled at myself and slapped my hand down on my knee. I stood up and paced the room, being mindful of my breathing and opening and closing my hands. I noticed the phone sitting on the table, and made an impromptu decision to call Amelia. I considered what I was going to say, and rejected the first several ideas. I didn't think 'If you don't see me again, assume I was drained dry in Nevada' would be the best way to begin a conversation.

I clicked the button on the phone and started to dial Tray's number, and then I realized I had no dial tone. I clicked the phone off and back on again, and still got nothing. I let my arm drop to my side and closed my eyes. The phone Russell had left for us had been disconnected, and my cell had long since died. I wondered if my friends and Jason would even know what happened to me if I didn't come home. Maybe Pam would pass the news along. I nearly smiled at that visual; Pam wasn't exactly the right type to bring that sort of news.

Just then my stomach growled at me, and I firmly reminded myself that I was not going to die tonight, so I was worrying over nothing. I headed for the door, opened it and flashed Liddy my brightest smile.

"Hi again," I said cheerfully. "Do you think I might be able to get a bite to eat around here somewhere?"

If I thought my chipper display would cause Liddy to return the attitude, I was sorely mistaken. She nodded her head - if you could even call such a small movement a nod - and she began walking rapidly. I followed her, and had no reservations in reaching into her head and we marched down the stairs and wound our way through the mansion's many rooms. I found out Liddy wasn't particularly happy about being ordered to follow me around. She didn't have anything against me personally, but she knew she had been chosen to guard me simply because she was a woman, and she resented that on a fundamental level. She also missed her family in Indiana, and hoped she would be able to return soon.

We passed a few more guards along the way, all male, all very fit and wearing uniforms similar to Liddy. As we entered the kitchen a few more human brains started buzzing in my head. Liddy stood in the entryway to the large and surprisingly modern kitchen, and crossed her arms over her chest without a word. My two bathroom buddies, Keith and Ted, were sitting at a round, wooden table and the red-haired teen, Lucas, was standing at a large island in the middle of the kitchen, leaning over a laptop computer. The guys all looked up as I entered and greeted me with nods, and waves. I smiled.

"You want something to eat?" Lucas asked me, and before I could answer he was already opening the refrigerator and pulling out some bags of what looked like sandwich meat. "We have ham, turkey, some Italian stuff..."

"Proscuitto," Keith said.

"Whatever. And cheese and mustard, whatever you want."

Lucas turned and smiled and me hugely. Keith and Ted both stood up and took their plates to the sink and rinsed them out and placed them in the dishwasher.

"We're taking off," Ted said, and he looked at Lucas. "You coming or staying?"

"I'll stick around here today," Lucas replied, glancing at me. Keith and Ted headed out then, and I walked over to the island.

"I'll just have ham and cheese," I said and Lucas opened a cabinet and pulled out a loaf of bread. I stopped him.

"I can make it," I laughed, and I started to put together my lunch while Lucas watched me with anxious eyes.

"How long will you be staying?" he finally asked.

"We're leaving tonight," I said, and I hope I didn't sound despairing.

"All of you?" he pressed, and I didn't need to be a telepath to know he was asking about Yasuka. I smiled gently.

"Yes."

I sat down at the table with my sandwich and started eating while Lucas tapped away at the laptop.

"I'm not gay, you know," he said suddenly and I stopped in mid-bite and stared up at him.

"I mean, I do things for Russell," he continued, stammering a bit and not meeting my eyes. "He's a decent guy. And he doesn't let his vamp visitors give us a hard time. It's a good job, working here, but Russell doesn't get a lot of girls that come to visit. And human girls I meet, when I tell them where I work....most of them think I'm gay. Or just weird."

I swallowed and took a long drink of water. I wasn't sure the proper response here.

"Anyway," Lucas said, looking at me again and smiling. "Do you think it would be okay if Yasuka wrote to me? Do you think she would be allowed?"

"I'm not sure I'm the right person to ask," I said slowly, choosing my words. Of course I wanted to say 'sure' but honestly, I knew I couldn't do that in good conscious because I had no idea what was going to happen to the new vampire Eric had apparently acquired.

"I made a webpage," Lucas said, spinning the laptop around so I could see the screen. "She can make one, too, and we can send messages and chat."

I stood up to get a closer look, and my eyebrows raised. The webpage looked very familiar, but with a distinctively gothic flair.

"What is that?" I asked, fascinated.

"It's a social networking site," Lucas explained. "For vampires and humans that want to meet them. It's called _Fangbook_."

I puffed out a laugh. Was he kidding me?

"See, this is my profile page," Lucas went on excitedly, and pointed to his photo. "This little blood drop here in the corner of my picture designates me as a blood bank. Vamps have a little fang symbol."

"You refer to yourself as a _blood bank_?" I repeated, and I found I couldn't look away from the screen; it was like a train wreck.

Lucas smiled. "That's what vamps call us behind our backs, you know."

"That and worse," I said very softly.

"Oh!" Lucas said, and he turned the laptop back around. "Did Yasuka tell you we found that Fellowship website last night? The one you told us about?"

"No, I really didn't get to talk to her."

"Those people are nuts," Lucas said, shaking his head. "I've made some progress in trying to find the person that owns that website. I told that other vamp, the one that was hurt."

"Bill?"

"Yeah, him. He's pretty knowledgeable about computers," Lucas smirked. "Most of the older vamps look at anything electronic like it's made of silver. Anyway, I've been chatting to some other bankers, ones that are in Louisiana. They're making some calls, trying to help me get some information about your Fellowship problem."

I didn't get a chance to thank him because right then a booming sound, like an enormous clock chime, echoed throughout the mansion. I sucked in my breath, and looked around, but Lucas touched my arm.

"That's the one hour warning," he explained, but then noticed my confused look. "It's one hour before sunset. There will be another chime every fifteen minutes. It gives us time to get the mansion in order. The King hates to wake up to chaos."

I glanced over at Liddy, who was still standing guard in the doorway.

"What's up with the guards?" I whispered. "I don't remember any the last time I was here."

"Because there weren't any," Lucas said quietly. "After Russell got hitched a lot of stuff changed. Indiana is big on security, and Bartlett sent a bunch of his crew down here to protect his husband and his new assets. You should see what they did to the lower areas where the vamps sleep. It's like Fort Knox down there."

I couldn't say I blamed the King at all for bumping things up a notch. It was still the craziest dichotomy; that vampires were nearly invincible at night, but more helpless than a sleeping child during the day. I wondered if that's why the pull to rest was so strong for them, why they couldn't resist the call to sleep. Without it, I couldn't imagine how any of them find could find the courage to close their eyes.

I finished up my sandwich, and poured myself a glass of juice and drank it down. I gazed out the large window that bordered the kitchen, and watched silently as the day slowly slipped into night, and wondered if I would ever see another day again. I found I noticed colors more sharply; the purple and the crimson that flashed across the sky. It was beautiful, and I wished I could have Eric with me at that moment to share it with him.

But, of course, that simply wasn't a possibility for us. Our life together, as it was, would forever be cloaked in darkness.

I realized I was rapidly becoming melancholy and if I wasn't careful I knew my mood could transform into fear. Another chime resounded through the mansion, causing the walls to tremble slightly and it helped to shake me back to the present.

I'm going back upstairs to wait for Eric," I said to Lucas, and he looked at me and slapped his laptop closed.

"I'll come with you."

Liddy fell in behind us, as expected, and dogged our steps back upstairs. Lucas and I made small talk for a while, and his presence was helping to keep me calm. The final chime sounded, and I felt my heart rate speed up in anticipation.

"Are you married to the big blonde?" Lucas asked me, and I shook my head.

"No, nothing like that. We're...well, I guess you can say we're dating."

It sounded lame, even to my own ears, but I hadn't yet figured out the right way to describe my relationship with Eric. Boyfriend sounded ridiculous under the circumstances.

And right then I felt my non-boyfriend very close to me, and getting closer. I had been sitting on the edge of the bed, and I stood up. When Eric came through the door a few moments later, I threw myself at him, wrapping my arms around him and squeezing. He stroked my back, and breathed in my hair.

"You slept well?" he asked me while I was still pressed against his chest.

"Yes."

"Have you eaten?"

I smiled and held him tighter. "Yes."

After about a minute, I was aware of two more empty spaces in the room. I pulled away from Eric, and looked around him to see Bill and Yasuka waiting patiently, if not exactly comfortably. The young vampire's eyes were fixed on Lucas in a hungry way, and he was returning the look.

"Our clothes arrived a little while ago, " I said and I walked to the bed and pointed. "I separated them all.

"Thank you, " Bill said, and he picked up the stack that belonged to him, and the shoes. He said something about taking a shower and he left quickly.

Eric summoned Yasuka, but the girl didn't respond. She hadn't moved closer to Lucas, but everything about her stance spoke of her hunger and of her fight to control it. She was going to be worthless until she fed, that much was clear.

"You, boy," Eric said, and Lucas turned to him. "Would you permit her to feed from you again?"

"That's why I came up here," he said without a hint of embarrassment.

Eric took up position behind Yasuka, as he did the night before, and held her as she bit and fed from Lucas. I noticed she got closer to him this time, pressing her body against him while he held her with both arms. I turned away, red faced, when I heard in Lucas' head that he was becoming aroused by the contact.

When Yasuka was done, she remembered to lick the wounds and her whole demeanor changed. She was relaxed now, and her face was pink. Eric let her go, and instructed her to get cleaned up and changed. Lucas, who looked anything but relaxed, offered to show Yasuka to another guest bathroom and Eric agreed.

When we were finally alone, Eric shut the door and held my face in his hands.

"You've been worried," he whispered.

"I'm sorry. I was trying not to. I didn't want to upset you."

Eric kissed me gently. "The only thing that upset me was that I couldn't be here to comfort you."

He placed his forehead against mine, and we stood together for a time, just basking in one another.

"When are we leaving?" I asked and Eric held me away and went to examine the clothes on the bed.

"As soon as we can get ready. I should call Pam."

"The phone isn't working."

Eric frowned, but didn't speak.

"What does that mean?" I asked.

Eric put his hands on his hips and looked around the room.

"It may not mean anything."

"Bill might have his cell phone," I offered.

Eric seemed to become lost in his thoughts after that, and I let the silence linger until a soft knock sounded at the door.

"Bathroom is free if you need it," Bill said when Eric opened the door. Bill looked really nice in his new clothes, dark pants and an olive colored shirt that suited his coloring.

"Do you have your phone with you?" Eric asked, and Bill nodded. We followed him to his room, and Bill tossed the phone to Eric, who dialed a number quickly and then left the room.

"Are you doing okay?" Bill asked me after a few moments of awkward silence.

"I'm alright. Trying not to think about it too much."

"I won't let them harm you."

I laughed without humor. "No offense, but I don't think there's much you will be able to do if they decide to kill me."

Bill didn't respond, but without warning I was suddenly assaulted with the most horrible vision from within Bill's head. I saw a woman, naked, being dragged by her hair into the middle of a crowd of vampires. I saw her cry, and plead for her life and saw the crowd as they laughed at her pleas. Then two vampires, one male and one female came forward and picked the woman up by her arms and legs while she flailed and screamed. Then the two vampires sunk their fangs into her neck and hip and fed from until she was dead, while the crowd cheered and a vampire in a long black robe announced justice had been served.

When the vision ended, I found myself shaking and being held in Bill's arms on the floor. He was saying my name, and stroking my hair, and when I looked at him I saw concern filling his eyes, but I felt like I might be sick. I shook my head, and pushed him away and I stood up and crossed the room. I tried to calm myself.

"Sookie!" Bill said, and when he placed his hand on my shoulder I flinched. He took a step away from me. "Please tell me what's wrong."

I turned to him, and I know my expression must have been tortured. How could I tell Bill I had just seen into his mind for the first time? How could I tell him what I saw scared me and disturbed me like nothing else? How could I tell him I saw him participate in a vile and cruel killing? I felt tears well up in my eyes, and I saw Bill's eyes go cold and dark as understanding started to make its presence known. He grabbed my arm and moved in very close to me.

"Victor isn't lying, is he?" he whispered right in my ear, so quiet I had to strain to hear. I couldn't answer him, I just trembled.

"Does Eric know?" he questioned, and still couldn't answer. I kept seeing that woman's face in my head, kept hearing her screams as they drained her. That could be me, very soon.

"Sookie," Bill said and he jerked on my arm to get my attention.

"Yes," I said, and I sounded shaky. "Eric knows."

Bill searched my face for a long time. I had no idea what he was thinking; his face was locked down as tight as I'd ever seen it. He still had a hard grip on my arm.

"If it makes you feel better," I whispered, trying to think of a way to diffuse the situation. "This was the first time I've ever got a look in your head."

Bill's expression changed, and he released my arm and stepped back.

"You can't do it all the time?"

I shook my head. "It's only happened maybe a dozen times, total."

"When did it start?" he asked, and his voice had gentled.

"After I started taking vampire blood."

"And you never told me?"

My eyebrows shot up and I tilted me head to the side in a 'you've got to be kidding' me gesture. Bill was about the last person who had a right to be affronted about someone having to keep secrets.

Bill rubbed a hand across his face and went to sit on the edge of the bed.

"You shouldn't go to Nevada," I said quietly, and Bill's eyes shot to mine. "You shouldn't stand up for me. Not now. You'd be lying."

Bill paused for a long time, staring straight ahead, then he stood up and placed his hands on my shoulders.

"Now that I know, you will need me more than ever. I'm going. Besides," he stopped and raised an eyebrow and smiled a fraction. "I'm not a half bad liar, am I?"

I couldn't prevent a laugh, and I covered my mouth to stifle it. Then I wrapped my arms around Bill's neck and hugged him with all my strength. He hugged me back. Then after a minute I stepped back as a sudden reminder hit me full force.

"What were you doing, participating in that kind of thing? That murder?" I was still speaking quietly, but no longer in a whisper. "Bill, that was..." I trailed off. I didn't have the words.

"When I was living in Washington, a vampire sent his human to gather information about our area. She was caught."

"And you killed her?"

Bill looked down, then back up and nodded. "I didn't do the actual deed, but I did have a vote. And I voted to have her put to death, yes."

I felt my tears flow again, and Bill took hold of my arms.

"It was forty years ago, Sookie. Times have changed. _I_ have changed."

I shook my head back and forth, trying to get that image out of my head.

"You changed me," Bill continued. "I don't see humans as expendable anymore."

"Does Felipe' De Castro?" I asked softly. "Do his people?"

The sound of quiet laughter and talking prevented further conversation, and Yasuka and Lucas entered the room together, holding hands. Yasuka looked lovely in her new clothes; a black and white outfit that set off her eyes and silky, dark hair.

"Look what Lucas give me!" she said, and she touched a pretty choker necklace with a dangling black heart charm.

"It's beautiful," I said and she smiled. I wondered if he went out earlier in the day and bought it as a present for her, or if it was something he found at the mansion. Not that it mattered.

Eric came back about fifteen minutes later, and handed Bill back his phone. Eric had showered, was wearing his new clothes and I couldn't help but notice he looked remarkably refreshed and a little pink. He put his arm around my waist and pulled me close to him, then he stiffened. I saw his nostrils flare, then I saw him flash a dangerous look in Bill's direction. Bill's mouth turned up in a half smile, and he winked at Eric. He winked! Eric's fangs snapped down.

I wanted to smack them both.

A few hard raps on the open door served to pull the vamps out of their game. Russell was standing in the doorway, looking resplendent in a suit I had no doubt cost more than I made in a month. Maybe two.

"My car is waiting at the front door, if you are ready to depart," Russell said, his southern charm oozing from every pore and dripping from the words.

"We're ready," Eric answered.

"Actually, I need to feed," Bill stated, and Russell smiled.

"I have a fine selection of donors just down the stairs. I'm sure you can find one that is agreeable to you."

Bill thanked Russell and slipped quietly from the room after slinging his laptop case over his shoulder.

Eric and I headed back to our room to gather our few things, while Yasuka and Lucas spoke quietly and exchanged E-mail addresses.

"What did Pam say?" I questioned on our way back to our room.

"Everything is as it needs to be," Eric answered. I expected him to say more, but he didn't. And I didn't ask.

"So," Eric said as we packed. "Why would my lover smell so strongly of another vampire?"

He didn't sound truly angry, but he sure wasn't happy or he wouldn't have said anything. I turned to him.

"I hugged him," I said simply.

"Why?"

I laughed a little. "Why? Oh, I don't know. Why would I hug a man I've known for more than two years? A man that has saved my life, and yours, and who is going to Nevada, despite the risks, to stand up for us."

Eric wasn't impressed.

"I don't like it," he said gruffly. "I don't want anyone else touching you."

"Well, since we're on that subject," I said coyly, and I walked over to Eric and touched his face. "What took you so long on the phone? And where is this flush in your cheeks coming from?"

"I fed," Eric stated without apology, and I dropped my hand and sighed. I suspected that was the case, but I still felt hurt. I tried not to show it and failed.

"I took so much from you last night," Eric said, and he touched my chin so I would look at him. "I didn't wish to task your strength."

"Was she pretty?" I said, and I knew I sounded petty and pouty but I just didn't care.

Eric laughed. "_He_ was very pretty, yes." Then he reflected a moment. "I hardly think you could find a human or vampire within the grounds of this compound that wasn't."

"Probably not," I agreed.

"But," Eric continued in a sultry voice, putting his hands on my waist and walking me backward toward the wall. "None of them are as desirable to me as my exquisite lover. My Sookie."

I felt my back hit the wall, and then Eric's lips pressed to mine. In a moment I had forgotten what I was supposed to be upset about. I was being childish anyway. I knew Eric had to feed to live, and I wouldn't always be with him. I hated the thought of him with anyone else, but it was one of the inevitable costs of loving this ancient vampire. The way I felt when I was with him; the way his touch shot through me like a lightening bolt, I decided it was a more than fair trade.

"We have to go," Eric said after several minutes, and he pulled away from me with obvious reluctance. We gathered up our few things and headed downstairs to find Bill and Yasuka waiting at the front door with Russell and another vampire I didn't recognize. The King introduced him only as Cross. If I would have had to guess, I would have pegged him as a bodyguard.

The group of us paraded down the outside stairs and piled into the limousine wordlessly. Russell, Eric an I sat on one side, and Bill and Yasuka took up position across from us. Right before we pulled away, Lucas came sprinting down the big steps of the mansion, yelling for us to wait and waving his arms. Russell rolled down the window, annoyed, and Lucas apologized profusely.

"What's so urgent?" The King demanded, and Lucas held out a slip of paper toward Bill through the window.

"I just got a message from one of my contacts. He gave me these names. They might be important."

"Thank you," Bill said, taking the paper. Lucas smiled, and backed away from the vehicle. Yasuka wathced him through the window as we drove away.

The drive to the air strip was quiet, and surprisingly short. A small, but very sleek looking plane was waiting for us, and we took little time boarding and getting ourselves situated for the flight. The seats were very large and plush, and there was an enormous television mounted in front of the rows. Eric and I sat together, and Bill and Yasuka also sat side by side. Bill pulled out his computer and the two of them started typing away and talking softly. I assumed they were working on the Fellowship problem but I didn't ask. Cross took up position in the very back, and I was sure it was so he could watch our every move.

Once we were in the air, Russell walked through the isle and graciously offerred the vamps True Blood. Then he sat in a seat nearest Eric and smiled widely.

"So how much of a finders fee is Felipe paying you?" Eric asked casually, and my eyes widened. I looked at the King.

"Enough to make it worth my while," Russell answered with a large smile.

"Felipe' is paying you?" I sputtered. "To deliver us to Nevada?" So much for the southern hospitality!

"Believe me, Miss Stackhouse," the King said soothingly. "It's far better that I managed to locate you before you crossed back into Louisiana."

"Eric!" I said, and I looked at him, horrified. But Eric seemed perfectly calm. Didn't it bother him at all that Russell had lied to us?

"He's absolutely right," Eric said. "I assumed De Castro had probably offered a reward for our capture; that's standard procedure in these cases. At least Russell was kind enough to give us a day to rest. Felipe's crew would not have been so hospitable if they were the ones to find us. It's only fair Russell gets paid."

Mr. Pragmatic, at your service.

"There is the other matter," Russell reminded Eric. "The matter of a vampire killed within my kingdom."

I involuntarily glanced at Bill, and saw he was listening to the conversation intently. Russell noticed my gaze.

"Ah, so am I right in assuming that it was Bill Compton that committed the grievous crime?"

"I did," Bill spoke up instantly.

"How fortuitous," the King said, and his genial smile returned. "Perhaps you and I can have a talk later about re-negotiating the terms of our contract, in regards to the computer program you have created for Mississippi and Indiana."

Bill's face never changed expression. "I believe that would be within your rights, Russell."

The King clapped his hands together. "Excellent! This has been a very profitable turn of events for my little state. Now, if you will all excuse me, I'm going to check on the pilots."

Russell stood, bowed his head in my direction and disappeared into the cabin.

"He's good," Bill said.

"He's very good," Eric agreed, then he looked at Bill for a good, long while.

"Let me know how much you're going to lose in that so-called contract re-negotiation. I'll compensate you."

"No, thank you," Bill said instantly, and he turned his attention back to his laptop. Eric sat back heavily. He didn't look happy.

"What?" I asked, and I leaned around Eric's big form to look at Bill.

"If I accept my Sheriff's gracious offer, his debt to me would be considered settled," Bill explained, never looking up. "I'd prefer to simply bank the favor, for now."

I leaned back, trying not to smile. In other words, Bill liked the idea of knowing Eric owed him. And he liked that Eric would have to wait and wonder when the favor would be called in. I shook my head. It scared me I was actually starting to understand the way vampires think.

We flew in silence for a long time, with Bill occasionally giving us updates on his progress in finding out who was in charge of the Fellowship website. Lucas, I learned, and indeed uncovered some helpful information via his 'banker' buddies on _Fangbook_. Apparently some of the kids he chatted with were friends of friends of kids who had been sucked in by the Fellowship's rhetoric. Some of those had dropped a name or two.

"So do you know who it is, then?" I asked. "The person in charge; the one that recruited those kids to do the bombings?"

"Not yet," Bill said. "But I'm getting closer. This person was pretty good about hiding his identity. I'll try to have the name before the end of the night."

"Why the hurry?" I asked, confused. Didn't we have more urgent matters to think about tonight? Eric and Bill both looked at me.

"What?" I asked, feeling once again like I was missing something big.

"If things go badly for us," Eric said quietly. "Bill is hoping he can negotiate on our behalf."

It took me a minute to process, but then the light switched on.

"You mean, if they decide to kill us, Bill would offer Felipe' the names of the people that attacked Louisiana in return for our lives?"

"In return for _your_ life," Bill stated. "There will be no bargaining for Eric if he's found guilty of what he is being accused."

"I doubt there will be any hope for me, either," I said, and I stared out the window into the darkness.

"Maybe not," Bill said. "But it could be the difference between them deciding to kill you, and just turning you."

"What?!" I almost screamed, and my eyes went from Bill to Eric and back again. "What are you talking about? Eric, what is he talking about?"

Eric turned to me as much as he could, and held my hands in his.

"Felipe' might consider you too valuable to waste. He may decide to turn you himself, to keep you for his own."

"I'd rather die," I said and I started to shake. Eric held onto me like an anchor in a storm.

I felt like I was going to throw up. My head started to pound, and I became dizzy. This hadn't been mentioned as an option. Not that it would have made much of a difference anyway.

"Hopefully it won't come to that," Eric soothed, and I could feel him trying to infuse confidence and calm through our bond. "Stay strong. Trust me."

I sat back then, and cried silently for a few minutes, praying to Jesus for strength. Neither Eric or Bill spoke again for the rest of the flight.

Finally Russell returned, and told us we were almost there. Eric took my hand and squeezed it. The plane shifted as we descended, and before I knew it we were bumping along the runway. When we finally came to a stop and the doors were opened and the steps let down, I saw another limousine, this one white, waiting for us along with several cars, all black. Four vampires were standing in formation around the vehicles, all dressed in black and wearing sunglasses even though it was nighttime.

Honestly, it reminded me of something out of a mafia movie.

"Eric Northman," one of the vampires said, and Eric nodded. They all exchanged very brief and perfunctory greetings. I was ignored, except for a few inquisitive glances, and that suited me just fine.

One of the vamps opened the limo door for me, and I slid in with Eric right behind me. Bill and Yasuka were made to ride in separate vehicles. Two of the mafia vamps rode with us in the Limo; one was a tall, thin female, and the other was an even taller, thinner male and he smiled at me with fang showing.

"Welcome to Las Vegas," he said.

-

- _to be continued_

_My lovely beta is having a blast in London this week, so I apologize for any boo-boos I didn't manage to catch. Thanks! xoxo_


	26. Chapter 26

_- I know! I missed doing an update last week! I sawwy! Graduations and birthdays and holidays Oh my! :)_

**Know Thyself**

**Chapter Twenty Six**

Nervous as I was - and it was a considerable amount - I still couldn't help but be mesmerized by Nevada's most infamous city. I'd seen movies, photos and heard stories about the so-called Sin City, but the real deal was way more impressive.

As we drove through the streets, I was riveted by the kaleidescope of colors and sounds. It was as if we had entered another world. I'd heard Vegas described as Disney for grown-ups, and I could see why; everything about the place served to appeal to your senses. It was designed to grab your attention and lure you in, and it was very effective. As serious as our situation was, I found myself staring wide-eyed out the darkened windows, peering up at the tall, intriguing building as if under a spell.

I was brought back to reality quickly when the driver of our limo was forced to hit the brakes hard as a group of tourists wandered carelessly into the street, laughing and shoving one another and clearly inebriated. One of the Nevada vamps said something too quiet for my human ears, but it was probably nothing I cared to hear anyway.

The driver took a couple left turns, and I felt Eric stiffen a bit beside me. I assumed we were getting close to our destination, and a few moments later I was proved correct as an enormous and colorful casino came into view.

My mouth actually fell open as I took in what could only be Felipe' De Castro's casino. The entire building was covered in bright, multi-colored glass. The entrance was grand, atop high steps, and beautiful women in extraordinary feather head-dresses and barely-there costumes waved to passer-bys and beckoned them to enter. I could see into the interior, and the male employees were dressed in traditional looking Latin regalia, complete with colorful, billowing sleeves and tight pants. I peered upward - and it was a long way up - to read the bright neon sign atop the casino and couldn't stifle a little chuckle. _The Fangdango._

Eric obviously caught my flash of brief amusement and I felt him shift slightly. I looked over at him for the first time since entering the city, and I found his eyes were fixed on me. His expression was a peculiar mix of resolve and caution, but he was keeping his emotions tightly controlled. I could pick up nothing at all through our bond. I glanced over at the two Nevada vamps, and they appeared to be staring straight at me, but I couldn't be sure because they were still wearing those unnecessary black sunglasses.

The driver went past the main entrance and headed into a smallish alley behind the building that sloped downward to an electronic, gated entrance. From my vantage point, I could see his arm reach out through the window and punch in a long string of numbers. The heavy gate opened silently, and as we drove through, I saw what looked to be a very high-speed security camera that swiveled to follow our movement.

We came to a stop after several long minutes of driving in a downward spiral. We seemed to be in a deep, underground section below the casino, surrounded by concrete and artificial light - the kind found in parking garages. I started to fidget, and felt my heart rate speed up as the vamps in black pulled out honest-to God little black radios and the female clicked hers on and held it to her mouth.

"We're here," she said, then she popped the little radio back into her jacket in a swift movement I barely registered.

I turned my head around when I heard the sound of more vehicles, and saw the other cars that met us at the airport pulling in and parking behind us. I breathed out a sigh of relief, realizing for the first time how easy it would have been for Bill and Yasuka to have been taken off somewhere else.

I wished like crazy I could ask Eric what was going to happen now, but I knew it wasn't the time or place to broach the subject. We also just didn't have time. The limo door closest to me opened suddenly, and a pale, unfamiliar vampire face looked down at me. He was wearing the same type of outfit as our vamp escorts, but his was a lighter color and he wasn't wearing sunglasses. I noticed his eyes were a vibrant green that contrasted handsomely with his pale skin. He had a little earpiece, and it reminded me of the type I saw secret service people wear in movies. After giving me a thorough once-over, he turned his attention to Eric.

"Welcome to The Fangdango, Sheriff Northman," he said politely, but without any trace of a smile. "If you and the woman will follow me, please," and he stood back from the door to allow us to exit.

I glanced briefly at Eric, and he nodded, so I slid myself out of the limo with Eric right behind me. The vamps in black silently took up position behind us. I wondered if they were armed, then figured they probably didn't need to be. But I bet they were.

I was acutely aware that I was the only human in the lot, and I felt a sudden, overwhelming desire to be inconspicuous. I tried to keep my breathing quiet, and if I could have found a way to mute my heartbeat, I would have done that, too. I reached my hand up and checked to make sure my hair was still in place, and found myself absently wondering if I had remembered to grab my hairbrush from Russell's bathroom. I shook my head, irritated at myself. What a thing to be thinking about at a time like this!

Something about Eric's presence was serving to keep me on an emotionally even keel - I knew it was the blood bond - and I felt an almost-forgotten twinge of annoyance rise up. On one hand, I was grateful our tie was somehow helping me to retain a sense of calm and focus, but on the other hand I wondered if the tie was also stripping away some good old-fashioned common sense. I mean really, I would have to be a complete idiot not to be on the verge of panic at this point, right? But I wasn't.

The green-eyed vampire wasted no time as he led Eric and I through a large glass door, then through a complicated series of hallways. He wasn't moving at vampire speed, but he sure wasn't matching a human pace either, and I was forced to almost jog at times to keep up. Eric placed his hand on my back a couple times, and I knew it meant to be a gesture of support. I glanced behind us once, but there was no sign of Bill or Yasuka. They were going to keep us separated, it seemed. The vamps in black still appeared to be staring holes through me each time I glanced their way. If they had been human, I might have called them out on their rudeness.

We finally stopped in front of an ornately carved, wooden door at the end of a long hallway. This had to be the boss' office, I thought, and I was right on the money. Felipe' De Castro himself opened the door for us, and even though I was scared to death of him and what he might do to me and Eric, I couldn't help but appreciate the view. He was every bit as handsome as I remembered, maybe even more so now that I could see him in the light. He was wearing an impressive ensemble; form fitting black pants and high boots, a vibrant red satin shirt, black vest and cape. He looked spectacular, if perhaps a little theatrical. No doubt Felipe' made rounds in his casino, enthralling the tourists much like Eric did at Fangtasia. And I bet his tourists enjoyed every second of it.

Eric bowed deeply, and I inclined my head respectfully.

"Eric," Felipe said, and I couldn't help but notice that his voice was devoid of any inflection. Then he turned his dark eyes to me and regarded me a long moment in silence.

"Miss Stackhouse," he said finally, and his accented voice sounded a little warmer when he addressed me. _Very _little. But I smiled at him sweetly, reminding myself that my sole purpose was to convince the King that I had nothing to hide. He needed to see that I was good as gold; innocent as a lamb; pure as the driven snow and yadda yadda yadda.

It was all bull, of course, but I had my game face on now, and I was ready to play. I was suddenly very ready to get this thing underway. I felt a surge of confidence and strength, and I thought I was even standing a little taller. I understood I was picking up on Eric's emotions, and a little piece of my brain wondered if he was truly feeling as positive as he was letting on, or if he was faking it for my benefit. I decided I didn't care.

"My King," Eric said formally as he righted himself.

"Enter," Felipe' said, and he stepped aside for us. As we moved past him, I saw Felipe' raise an eyebrow at the two vampires that had escorted us in the limo. As if in answer to an unspoken question, the tall, male vamp shook his head slightly. The silent exchange gave me a second of unease, but I let it go.

Felipe's office was masculine and functional, with solid looking, dark colored furnishings and what I was sure was expensive artwork gracing the walls. The carpeting was plush, and the lighting was bright without appearing harsh. The King motioned for us to sit on a leather sofa, and we did. The vamps in black moved silently and swiftly, and in seconds they were spread out around the room. Felipe sat at his impressive desk and leaned forward, favoring Eric with a hard look.

"I have not survived so long by being gullible," Felipe' said after a while. "And I did not become King of three states by being a fool."

He paused, probably to let his words sink in, or perhaps for simple dramatic effect. Eric didn't respond, and he met the King's gaze unwaveringly. Felipe' leaned back in his chair before he continued.

"You are valuable, Eric, but not irreplaceable. I'm sure I don't have to tell you that there are others in my position that would have seen you staked without trial at the mere hint of treason. Fortunately for you, I have been around long enough to know the value of our traditions. And I respect our laws, though I admit I find them tedious at times."

Felipe' stood up then, walked around his desk and stood in front of Eric. "You will receive a fair hearing, Northman. You have my word."

Eric stood as well, and he towered over the King by a substantial margin. He bowed stiffly at the neck.

"I am grateful for the opportunity to address the charges that have been leveled against me."

"If I find that you have betrayed me," the King said, catching Eric's eyes. "You will not rise another night. You have my word on that, as well."

It occurred to me that the King had not so much as looked at me during the whole exchange. I was all but invisible to the him tonight; beneath his notice. I was taken aback at first, since it was so different from the way he treated me the first time - the only time - we'd met. But then I realized I was on Felipe's turf now. He was going to do things his way, the vampire way.

I was smack in the middle of the good ol' vamps club now, and I knew what that meant. I was Eric's pet, nothing more. If I got out of line, it was his duty to jerk my chain and make me heel. Though my inner human was busy feeling righteous anger and mentally burning bras, the practical part of me - the part that valued my life - sat still and remained silent.

Then Felipe' snapped his fingers at the green eyed vampire.

"Jay, escort them to the waiting area until we're ready to begin."

Without another word, the King turned swiftly and strode from the room, his cape billowing behind him. I stood, and Eric touched my back as he nodded for me to follow the vampire, Jay, and I did. The other two vamps, the ones with the sunglasses, followed us. And they were _still _staring at me. Jeez!

Jay led us through a different door from the one we entered, and down yet another winding hallway. We ended up in front of a bright red door, and when Jay opened it I was relieved to see Bill and Yasuka sitting together at a small table in the nondescript but comfortable room. Bill had his computer plugged in and he was focused intently at the screen, but when he saw Eric and I enter, he pushed back in his chair and regarded us seriously.

"I'll be back when we're ready for you," Jay said, and he left, shutting and locking the door from the outside before he took off. I could feel two blank spaces just outside the door, and I knew the Ray-Ban vamps were standing guard.

"What news?" Bill asked.

Eric leaned against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest.

"I've been assured of a fair trial."

"He's going by tradition?" Bill asked.

"So it seems."

"What does that mean?" I asked.

Eric didn't move when he answered. "There will be a panel of judges that will render a decision after hearing the case."

"But the King retains the final word," Bill added.

I wasn't sure exactly what I would be expected to do, what our plan was, and I was just about to ask when I felt several non-vampire minds close by. My hand went to my throat as I recognized one.

"Quinn," I whispered, and suddenly I had Eric's very rapt attention.

"The tiger is here?" he asked, and I nodded.

"He's not alone. There are several others with him, all shifters."

"Hmph," Eric said, and he didn't sound unhappy. "It seems Felipe' is really going to do this by the book, as they say these days."

"Literally," Bill murmured.

"EeE?" I asked, and the vampires confirmed my suspicion.

I guess I shouldn't have been surprised, but I was. Quinn was involved with Extremely Elegant Events, and their big job was to go around and host big deal events for the supe community. Events like trials and executions. And Quinn had been conscripted into the service of the Nevada vampire crew since before the takeover.

I wasn't sure how I felt about seeing Quinn again; we hadn't parted on the greatest of terms, and in hindsight I had been more than a little unfair and hard on him. It was awkward enough having to deal with this crises in the combined presence of one current and one ex lover. Now I was going to have another tossed into the mix. I wondered how many women could say they had all their past and present sexual partners in the same room at the same time? While facing a possible death sentence? I was thinking the number was low.

The one positive was that I knew Quinn and EeE took their work very seriously, and they would make sure the law was followed. The problem, of course, is that every law had loopholes, and vamps had been around long enough to find every single one of them.

Bill started to work on his laptop again, and he and Eric talked very quietly for several minutes, so quietly I couldn't hear a single word. I knew they were being cautious because of the vamps outside the door. I stepped behind Bill and peeked over his shoulder to see what he and Eric were discussing. It was what looked to be a technical site, and there were a lot of words I didn't understand, but I was pretty sure it had something to do with Bill trying to figuring out who was behind that Fellowship website.

None of us spoke much after that. I paced the floor and concentrated on breathing while trying to think of every possible answer I could give to every possible question that could be directed at me. I wondered, however, if I would even be a part of the proceedings, or if my status as human would relegate me to be a simple observer at my own trial. I was just about to ask Eric when I heard the sound of keys in the lock on the door.

Mr. Cataliades entered the room, and the door was shut and locked behind him. I beamed up at the demon lawyer, and he returned my smile, though much more conservatively. He touched my shoulder in a friendly gesture, then turned his eyes to Eric.

"I understand you are in a spot of trouble, Mr. Northman," he said, his voice a pleasing combination of seriousness and light.

"That's what they tell me," Eric said, his mouth turning up in a half smile. He then turned his head very emphatically toward the door, clearly intended to remind the demon that we were not at liberty to talk freely. Attorney/Client confidentiality was clearly not part of the vampire judicial system.

Mr. Cataliades spread his hands, looking apologetic. "I'm afraid I've been told I am to be here only as an impartial observer, and to answer any question of law that my arise. I am not at liberty to represent or offer assistance to any party."

My heart sank at the words, but Eric took this news without expression, without a trace of surprise. He looked at me and must have felt my concern because he reached out to me and pulled me in close to his side. He stroked my arm in a soothing manner and I felt my anxiety melting away.

"If you require anything in regards to your defense, I can try to arrange it," the lawyer continued.

"I requested the services of a certain witch," Eric stated and the lawyer frowned.

"Yes. The spellbinder Edusai arrived not long ago. I'm curious - as is he - as to what assistance he could possibly be in this matter."

Eric smiled. "I'm afraid I'm not at liberty to offer an explanation on the matter to a person not acting as my lawful representative."

Eric had been pulling me closer and closer as he spoke the words, and I wondered if he realized what he was doing. It seemed to be a sub-conscious act, and I found I had to move away from him a little just to take a deep breath.

Mr. Cataliades nodded, and took a step backward. He placed one hand on his chest and bowed very slightly at the waist. "I wish you well, Eric. And you, Miss Stackhouse. I don't think I'm betraying my position here by saying I sincerely hope the outcome of these proceedings are favorable for you both."

We thanked him, and it was none too soon. Right then the door opened again and the vampire Jay stood in the doorway.

"We're ready for you," he said.

I looked up at Eric. He kept his eyes on Jay, but he gave me one final squeeze before releasing me and heading for the door. I followed him, but Bill and Yasuka were stopped.

"Not you two," Jay said, stepping in front of them.

"I'm here to witness for my Sheriff," Bill said in his always calm voice.

"Is that so?"

Eric turned, poised to argue, but the lawyer intervened, citing some point of vampire law that apparently made sense to Jay. He stepped aside to let Bill pass.

"You can go," Jay stated, "but the young one stays here."

Since there was no legal argument around that, Bill gave Yasuka some instructions in Japanese and she went back to sit at the table.

Jay led us back down the hall while the two vamps in black dogged our steps. I glanced back at them as we walked, and found them still very focused on me. I didn't even care any more. I found myself wondering if they were the ones who would get to do the honors if I was sentenced to death by draining. Maybe they were trying to decide where to place the first bite.

We were escorted to a large, circular room with dark, hardwood flooring and red paneled walls. It had clearly been designed to function as a place for ceremonies; there were rows of seats around the perimeter of the room, and dark, wooden railing separating the seats from a sunken stage-like area. In the very center of the floor was a long table with three chairs, and in each chair was a vampire. It was much like the trials I had witnessed Rhodes, but the atmosphere in the room was completely different; more intense and somber. Of course, that could easily have been my own perception since I was the one on trial this time.

Directly behind the long table, Felipe' De Castro was seated in a large chair on what looked to be a very sturdy, but temporary, raised platform. Mr. Cataliades took up position in a smaller chair to his right. And in a chair on the King's left, looking polished and calm, sat Victor Madden.

Once I noticed him, I found I couldn't take my eyes off of him. A wave of memories slammed into me as I stared at his infuriatingly smug face and posture. I felt a phantom pain in my healed shoulder where he had bitten me, and I flinched involuntarily when I remembered what his weight felt like when he was pressing me into the ground. I shook with rage when I recalled his vile thoughts as he....

_Stop!_

I pulled my eyes from Victor and bowed my head. I remembered what I had told Eric, how I would not allow Victor Madden to get into my head, and I vowed to be true to my own words. I took a calming breath, pushed the memories away and shored up my mental fortitude. When I raised my head again, my mind was clear and I noticed that Victor wasn't looking at me at all. His cocky gaze was directed right at Eric. I risked a peek up at my vampire.

Eric was perfectly still, and he met Madden's stare squarely. His unblinking blue eyes were cold as ice, and his expression and stance screamed danger so loudly I felt myself instinctively shrink back from him. I didn't need a blood bond to let me know Eric was calling upon a thousand years of practiced control to keep from launching himself across the room and tearing Victor Madden limb from limb.

Part of me wished he would let that control slip, but of course if that happened he and I would be dead within seconds. There were many guards scattered throughout the room, and they had all taken several steps closer in response to the nearly palpable tension between the two vampire Sheriffs.

I looked to my right, and saw Quinn standing silently in a military 'at ease' position, flanked by two other EeE shifters. He caught my eye, but made no move to acknowledge me further. After a second, he shifted his eyes forward again. I tried to reach into his mind, but it was a tangled web of undefined emotion, as was typical of shifters.

Seated in one of the spectator chairs outside the main circle was a small contingent of humans. One was an older man, tall and broad shouldered. He was clearly the legendary witch, Baako. I knew this not only from his incredibly focused and powerful mind, but also from his brightly colored robes and kufi cap. He was joined by another man, and a woman, both of which had the distinct whiff of otherness surrounding their minds which marked them as witches.

Also sitting in the spectator section was Russell Edgington - who I swear actually seemed to _look_ a little richer - and his bodyguard, Cross.

At some unspoken signal, Quinn moved to stand before the panel of vampires that were clearly there in a judge and jury capacity. I glanced at Eric briefly, and he looked down at me with an unreadable expression. I felt another rush of confidence and strength, and I took a deep, calming breath as Quinn began speaking.

"We have assembled here today at the request of King Felipe' De Castro," Quinn said, his voice as deep and rich as I remembered, but lacking any trace of emotion. "Eric Northman, Sheriff of Area Five in Louisiana, has been accused of treason by Victor Madden, Sheriff of Area One in Louisiana. Both the accuser and the accused have sworn fealty to King De Castro, and are obliged to submit to his authority."

I actually had to bite the inside of my cheek to keep from snorting. I was sure this was all very informative to any vamps that had, oh, I don't know, maybe been living in a crypt for the past few weeks, but to me the pomp and ceremony here was nothing more than a tedious waste of time.

Quinn went on for a while more, introducing the vamps that had been summoned to be hear the case - all were Sheriffs in surrounding Kingdoms. I guess Eric was entitled to a jury of his peers. At the end, Quinn made a sweeping gesture with his arm, and a door opened on the far side of the room and two vampires entered, pushing a table on wheels. Atop the table was what appeared to be a black velvet cloth that was clearly covering something I assumed must be important. I glanced up at Eric curiously , but he didn't meet my eyes.

The vampires pushed the table closer, and positioned it perpendicular to the table with the vampire judges. Silently, one of the vampires took hold of one end of the black cloth and flung it off the table with great ceremony and with such speed it caused the cloth to make a snapping sound in the air. I would have probably laughed at the theatrical display if what I saw revealed under the cloth wasn't so serious. A dark wooden stake about three feet long lay silent and deadly on the table, next to a large, rolled bundle of...something. I sucked in a sharp breath as the very real danger in our situation slapped me hard upside the head.

Without a sound, the second table-pushing vampire took hold of the big roll and walked to stand right in front of me and Eric. When he got closer, I saw that the bundle he held was actually a large tarp that had been rolled up tightly. The vampire took hold of one end and flung the tarp, allowing it to unfurl onto the floor. I was confused, but only for a second, and when I understood the meaning of the strange item I felt like my legs were going to give way underneath me. The stake was meant for Eric, and the tarp would be used to dispose of my body after I was drained dry.

I choked out a small noise, and Bill, who was standing behind me, made a low, threatening sound. Eric didn't move; apparently he expected this. I briefly wondered how many such trials he had been witness to during his long life.

Once the vamps had finished their big display, Quinn stepped forward again. I guessed he must be like the MC for the event.

"Victor Madden," Quinn said loudly, "You have brought forth allegations against another of your kind. You will now state your claim before the judges."

Victor Madden stood slowly, adjusting his suit jacket as he did so. He walked almost regally to the judge table, but before he turned to them, his eyes met mine for the first time. He offered me a very small, very insincere smile, and he let his gaze wander, looking me up and down in a leering manner. I felt anger and shame flash through me, starting at my toes and coming to rest in my face. I wanted to snatch up the stake and shove it right through his heart myself.

"He's trying to provoke me," Eric whispered, and he was so quiet I had to strain to hear him even though he was right beside me. "Say nothing, no matter what happens. I will be expected to speak for you."

Eric didn't turn to look at me when he spoke, and I kept my eyes forward as well. My inner cave woman wanted to come out swinging at the implications in Eric's words, but my inner sense of self-preservation won the battle. Eric had dealt with vampire affairs for about one thousand years, which was about one thousand years longer than me. I was going to stand still, shut up and trust that Eric had learned a thing or two in all those years.

"My friends," Victor stated, a smile on his face and in his voice as he started to address the judges. "What I must do here today causes me great pain." He paused and gestured to Eric, and his expression turned sad. "Eric Northman is one of the oldest of our kind, and I have always held our ancients in great esteem. I never had any wish to do him harm, but my duty to my King must supercede my sentiments."

I wanted to gag.

"You all know me," Victor continued, and he walked back and forth in front of the judges tables as he spoke, making eye contact with each judge in turn. I wondered if he watched a lot of Law and Order reruns to prepare. "I have been in service to Felipe' De Castro for almost a century. My loyalty is absolute, and it is because of my loyalty that I felt duty bound to bring to light the treasonous actions of Eric Northman."

Could the guy be any more full of bull, I wondered? In my mind, I was flipping Vic the bird, but on the outside I was the picture of calm.

"As we all know," Victor kept on, and he stood loosely in the center of the floor now with his hands clasped in front of him. "The Human radicals attacked the Kingdom of Louisiana in a series of assaults that left several in our leadership dead and injured. Eric was assumed killed when his own club, Fangtasia, was destroyed in a bomb attack. Of course, we have since learned that Eric's absence after the attack was due to a summons by his maker."

Oh yeah, Victor was piling it on thick now. I doubted anyone would call being subdued with silver chains and shards being 'summoned.' I guess Eric took exception as well, because he very deliberately took one step forward.

Quinn noticed Eric's movement, and it must have meant something to him because he held up one hand.

"Exception or clarification?" Quinn asked.

"Both," Eric answered. I had no clue what all this was about, but I hoped it involved some sort of pain for Victor.

Quinn cited some vampire law that sounded very legal, and Eric was permitted to address the assembly.

"My maker, Izo, did indeed come to Fangtasia the night of the bombing to lay claim to me. However, his summons was not by chance." Eric's blue eyes were hard and they were boring into Victor mercilessly. "I heard my maker speak the name of Victor Madden, and I was able to ascertain that it was he who contacted Izo and requested his assistance in removing me from Louisiana. I believe he intended for me to be killed."

"That is a lie!" Victor thundered, looking positively outraged. Quinn held up his arms and stepped in between the two vampires.

The three vampire judges were leaned in toward one another and were having some sort of discussion I couldn't hear. I looked up at Eric in a panic, but he was still focused on Victor.

"Eric won't win this one," I heard Bill say very softly right in my ear. I flinched; I hadn't heard him step beside me. "He knows he won't win, but his accusation might serve to chip away at Victor's credibility."

I nodded, and thought maybe Eric was watching some Law and Order episodes, too.

The vampire judge in the middle held up her hand.

"We are in agreement," she said, and she sounded bored. "The claim of a maker on his child is absolute. The purpose behind Izo's summons is irrelevant. His claim was lawful and will not be refuted."

Eric bowed respectfully at the neck and stepped back. Victor smirked and continued his line of bull.

"As I was saying, when Eric was assumed killed, I became the de facto Sheriff of Area Five. I was concerned for the welfare of Miss Stackhouse, one of Eric's human lovers. She was granted our formal protection from my King and, though human, she was considered a valuable asset. In Eric's absence, the obligation to ensure her safety fell to me."

I was having a harder and harder time trying to control my emotions. The more I heard Victor Madden's arrogant, lying voice, the angrier I became. And his jab about my being 'one of' Eric's lovers wasn't lost on me, either. He really was a jerk of monumental proportions, but I didn't like the way the judges were looking at him. Vamps aren't big on expressions, but they all three seemed to be very focused on what Victor was saying. And worse, I had to admit that from an outsiders point of view, Victor's long winded argument was thus far very believable.

"Even though my own area had been viciously attacked," Victor was saying, "I left immediately for Bon Temps to offer my assistance, and my fears were proved justified. The human radicals that took part in the attacks in our Kingdom located Miss Stackhouse and attempted to kill her. She was forced from the road and was injured in the resulting crash. When I located her, she was not fully conscious." Victor paused then, and turned to face me directly. He pointed his finger at my accusingly. "It was then that I found out the truth about Eric Northman and his human. Miss Stackhouse read my thoughts."

All three vampire judges turned to look at me, and a quick scan told me that I had the undivided attention of every single supe in the room. It wasn't a comfortable feeling, and I was immensely grateful for the flow of support and strength coming through the blood bond. I needed all I could get.

One of the judges made a motion with his hand and Quinn acknowledged him.

"How did you know she read your thoughts?"

Victor grunted, smiled as though he expected the question. And I'm sure he did. "In her semi-conscious state, Miss Stackhouse answered a question I was thinking, but had not yet asked. I would have dismissed it as coincidence, but then she did it again! In her stupor, she was apparently unable to keep up the charade she has managed to perfect over the years. I was shocked, of course, and angry as I'm sure you can imagine."

Victor put his hands on the table then, and leaned in to the judges and spoke to them like they were old pals.

"That human over there knows our every thought. Consider that, my friends. We have all been compromised _by a human_."

Victor shook his head, and I could see by the expressions on the faces of every vamp in the room that his words had struck a chord. I shuddered and my gaze went instinctively to the tarp still lying at my feet.

Victor stood up straight with a big flourish. "It was then that everything fell into place. It was then that I realized Eric Northman knew of her true abilities. I understood why Eric had chosen to become blood bonded to her." Victor spread his hands and raised his eyebrows. "How many of us, in this day and age, need to establish a blood bond to maintain a human? It's laughable! He bound her to him for her abilities, of which he was surely well aware."

Victor shook his head then, like he was scarcely able to believe his own words. Not much of a stretch, really.

"And if you will recall, Eric is the vampire that killed another of our blood not long ago. In all of your long years my friends, how often have you even heard of one vampire staking another without trial? It happens so rarely, it is almost a myth! Yet Eric did this, he killed one of his own kind _for a human_! For _that_ human! Why would one such as Eric, with his age and his position, commit such a rogue act? Because he knew her capabilities! With her by his side, Eric knew he would have unlimited access to our very minds. He would have an unprecendented advantage on every one of us, including his own King."

Victor pointed at me again, and I felt the blood draining from my face under his dark stare. My reaction must have given the control-freak in him a boost, because he really began to rant. I noticed the guards had come closer.

"I decided to bring her here to my King, to let him decide what was to be done with her, but several other humans arrived at the scene of the wreck, and it would have been impossible for me to transport her out of the area without resorting to killing the others. Like all of you, I respect our position in society now, the rules we must live by now that we are out in the open. I will not kill unnecessarily. So I let her go, and reported the event to my King immediately, as I am sworn to do. I knew we would be able to find her again quite easily. And now, we are here."

There was a long moment of silence, and then Quinn stepped forward and nodded at Eric.

"Do you wish to respond to the charges?"

In answer, Eric stepped forward slowly, his large form seeming bigger than ever as he stood before the table of judges. Victor - wisely - returned to his position beside the King. I watched Eric's every move, and I was trying hard to control my fear so I wouldn't be a distraction.

"I am no traitor," Eric said, cutting straight to the heart of the matter. He turned his gaze to Felipe' and they regarded one another for a long moment in silence. Then he turned back to the judges.

"Sookie Stackhouse is mine," Eric said, and hearing him say the words sent ripples down my spine. "My claim on her was no secret, and this is why Victor Madden failed to mention how he hunted her down, attacked her and fed from her." Eric paused and turned his head to Victor. "He failed to tell you how he forced himself on her while she was injured from the wreck."

Eric paused and looked up at Felipe'. "He meant to turn her, so he could harness her telepathy. As you know my King, her ability to read _human minds_ is common knowledge, and that alone makes her a valuable asset- an asset that rightfully belongs to you and your Kingdom. But Victor sought to make her his child so that asset would always belong to _him_. He is the traitor here. He has violated our traditions and laws for his own self-serving desires. When he failed in his attempt to turn her, he concocted this story." He turned back to the judge panel. "He is trying to prey on your fears."

I tore my eyes from Eric and glanced around the room. Quinn was visibly upset by Eric's words, but he held himself in check. A few of the vampires looked at one another, and I wished I knew what those looks meant.

"Do you have proof of this alleged attack?" the vampire judge in the middle asked, and her tone was suspicious.

"I do," Eric stated, and as he reached into his pocket I felt my eyes go wide. What kind of proof could be possibly have?

Eric's back was to me, but I thought I saw him pull a small, plastic pouch from his pocket, like a little sandwich bag.

"Sookie's clothes were torn off during Victor's attack," Eric said solemnly, and he placed the plastic bag on the table. "This is a piece of her clothing from that night. It retains her blood, and her scent. It also smells of Victor Madden."

I sucked in a sharp breath and I felt Bill's hand touch mine, and I instinctively grasped it. How did Eric get that? I considered it briefly, and I knew it had to have been Pam. She was every bit as forward-thinking as her Master, and she had access to my clothes. I was grateful for her foresight, because it was helping to prove Eric's argument, but I knew it had to be my underwear in that bag, and I was horrified.

Then Victor, amazingly, started to laugh.

"Is that what she told you, Eric?" he asked, and he waved his hand in an amused gesture.

"Are you denying this is your scent?" one of the judges asked incredulously. He opened the bag and took a sniff. He passed it along to the next judge, who did the same. I closed my eyes, embarrassed beyond belief.

"You attacked a human that belonged to another Sheriff," said another judge, frowning. "Eric would be within his rights to demand restitution."

Victor's grin didn't budge, and I got a sinking feeling in my stomach.

"There was no breach of tradition," he said, and he walked to stand within a few feet of Eric. "When Miss Stackhouse realized her mistake - that she had let it slip she could read vampire minds - she panicked. I told her I was going to take her to the King for judgment, and she tried to make a deal so I would let her go free."

Victor turned to me, and this time he was much more bold with his open leering. "I didn't want to bring it up, out of respect for Eric, but she offered herself to me."

"What?!" I screamed, and I lunged forward in anger. Bill's grip on my hand pulled me back, but I struggled.

Eric growled and started toward Victor, but in a flash three of the guards surrounded him. One grabbed him around his neck and the other two held his arms. Powerful as he was, it was still three against one. There was a struggle, but the guards finally succeeded in pulling Eric many yards away from Victor.

"Let him go!" I screamed, and Bill wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me to him, my back to his chest.

"Don't," he hissed in my ear. "Sookie, your words aren't welcome here."

I could see and feel that Eric was making an attempt to calm himself, and I tried to follow his lead. My outburst was mostly ignored though, since everyone was listening to Victor, who started up again once he was confident Eric had been subdued. Coward.

"She was brazen in her seduction," Victor said and he motioned to me. "She revealed her breasts, she told me she was part Fae and that her blood was rich and intoxicating. Tell me, who among us could resist such a treat so freely given? I did take her, yes, but she gave herself to me willingly, so no law was broken." He shrugged. "I assume she made up this story of an attack as a way to explain my scent on her clothes and on her body."

The three judges put their heads together again, and Eric looked at me from across the room. He knew Victor was lying, of course, but I knew it had to cut him to the core to be forced to listen to the words. I begged him with my eyes to forgive me for getting him into this mess. And amazingly, I thought I saw the same request in his.

"Perhaps proof of my claim would help?" Victor suggested after a moment.

"No," Eric said, and his voice was as cold as I'd ever heard it.

"What proof would you offer?" The judge in the middle asked. I got the impression she was the the spokesman for the group.

Victor smiled back at me. "She told me she was part Fae. A very small percentage of the population can boast that claim. You could sample her blood for yourselves, and then you will know that my version of events are true."

"Don't touch her," Eric said and he used all his strength to pull against the guards. He managed to pull the two on his arms off balance, but then a fourth joined in and he was back in their control. He looked like he was trying to say something, but the guard had such a grip around his throat, he couldn't speak.

Bill pushed me behind him. "Mr. Cataliades?" he asked, and I looked around Bill to catch the demon lawyers eyes. I prayed there was some legal thing he could come up with that would prevent me from being subjected to Victor's 'proof'. Then a thought slammed into my brain, breaking through my panic.

"He's right," I said loudly, "I am part fae. I admit it freely."

I wasn't sure what made me announce my heritage so loudly, but it seemed to work. The demon lawyer stood up immediately.

"If she admits to the claim, there is no need for further proof."

I relaxed immediately, as did Bill. Eric stopped struggling, and the guards loosened their grip on him. He looked at me and I saw both amazement and happiness in his eyes. A belated awareness struck me as I understood that Eric had somehow _sent_ the words to my head, the words he had been trying to speak, but couldn't. I wasn't sure if I'd read his thoughts - and how ironic would that be considering the circumstances - or if his ability to call to me had ratcheted up another level.

Quinn tried to get things back on track, and he ordered the guards to release Eric - after a firm admonition that there would be no violence until the verdict. Victor, clearly dejected that his attempt to humiliate me and provoke Eric had been denied, sulked back to sit by the King.

The spokesman vamp stood up suddenly, and I noticed she had some fang showing. I wondered if she was disappointed she wasn't allowed to sample the 'proof' of my heritage. She cast her gaze on Eric.

"Sheriff Northman," she said directly. "I am going to ask plainly: do you have any refutation of the claim that your human has the ability to read vampire minds?"

"It is a difficult thing to disprove," Eric said truthfully, then he turned his head in Bill's direction. "I do have a witness, however."

"Then let the witness come forward."

Bill looked at me, and he smiled gently. I couldn't bring myself to smile back at him, I was still running too high on emotion, and not in the good way. I was scared at the turn the trial had taken, I was furious at Victor's accusations, and the dark tarp on the ground seemed to be taunting me.

Bill stood in front of the judges table, and when he spoke his voice was completely calm, his voice as smooth as ever.

"As My Sheriff has stated, it is a hard thing to prove that Sookie - Miss Stackhouse - lacks the ability the read our minds. I would like to offer myself as proof that she can not."

"You offer yourself?" one of the judges asked, and he leaned forward skeptically.

"Several years ago," Bill stated, and he turned to glance at me once more "I was approached by my old Queen to find Sookie and obtain her trust. The Queen knew of her telepathy, you see, and wished to use her. Like most of you, I found the idea of maintaining a relationship with a human abhorrent. But I fulfilled my duty through deception. I took Sookie as my lover, convinced her of my love......"

And that's when I stopped listening and started crying. Bill was still going on, and he was laying it on thick. He was claiming he never cared for me, that he used me and lied to me on a daily basis. I knew it was killing him, I knew he was lying, and I knew why he was doing it. I once thought his lies would kill me, now they might save me.

"....I submit to you," Bill was finishing up, "That if Sookie could indeed read vampire minds, I would never have been able to deceive my way into her bed. I will give my word that Eric Northman is innocent of the charges against him."

When Bill finished speaking, he came back to stand by me and I couldn't meet his eyes. I just reached down and took his hand, and squeezed once. He understood.

Eric moved to stand beside me, and his proximity immediately helped to calm my nerves. Quinn made some official sounding announcements, and the three vampire judges turned to one another and seemed to be making a decision. I looked at Victor, and he looked completely pleased with himself.

"Is that it?" I asked softly, and Eric nodded.

"We're still on?" Bill asked, and Eric nodded again.

"Still on for what?" I asked, and Eric looked into my eyes. He didn't say a word, and he didn't have to. I could see it in his face. If the verdict went badly, he had no intention of going quietly.

Eric put his hands on my face and he kissed me. I was utterly stunned until I realized he was using the kiss as a ruse.

"Do you remember the way out?' he asked softly as his lips worked on mine.

"I think so," I said and I stroked his neck for effect.

"Bill and I will hold them off as long as we can. Run, Don't look back."

"Eric," I started to protest, but Bill made a noise to get our attention.

When we pulled apart, we saw the judges and everyone else were looking at us, some with amusement, some openly disgusted. Well, screw them all, I decided.

"We've reached our decision," the spokesman said, and she stood up. Victor moved to stand in front of the table, but he still kept a safe distance from Eric. The guards moved in close, ready for any trouble.

"The decision proved difficult, and it was not unanimous. This case is the word of one Sheriff against another, and we understand the travesty if we choose wrong. In the end however, we decided that it was more beneficial, both to King De Castro and to our kind as a whole, to err on the side of caution. And rogue actions, past and present, make us very cautious. To that end, Eric Northman, we find you guilty of treason against your King. The penalty for this offense is death. We will leave the fate of your human to your King, since she was placed under his formal protection."

The vampires wasted no time. Before the words were even finished being spoken, the guards moved in to take hold of Eric, and a few grabbed Bill. Looked like they expected a fight.

Another vampire guard picked up the stake from the table, walked over to the King and ceremoniously presented it to him. Felipe' took it in both hands, and stepped down from the elevated throne and walked slowly toward Eric.

I wanted to scream, to protest, but the words stuck in my throat. I was so horrified I couldn't make a sound. I felt my legs go weak, and I sagged. Eric looked down at me, and I started to shake as I looked into his eyes. I was amazed to see he appeared absolutely calm.

The two vamps in black that had been shadowing me all night came over and pulled me to my feet, one grabbing each arm.

Felipe', stake in hand, stopped in front of Eric and looked at him closely. Then he turned his gaze to me.

"I didn't become King by being a fool," he said, and he nodded at the two vamps in black that held me.

The vision I saw in Bill's head came back to me then, and I said a silent prayer that I wouldn't scream too loudly.

_To be continued_

_Ok, I didn't want to end it here, but this chapter had already gotten out of control! Again, super sorry about not getting this up sooner. I hope it wasn't too much of a disappointment after the delay! I'm still missing my wonderful Beta, hence the boo boos I know I missed! :)_


	27. Chapter 27

**Know Thyself**

**Chapter Twenty Seven**

I came close to passing out for a few seconds. The phrase 'scared to death' came to mind, and for the first time ever I understood what it meant. The only thing that kept me afloat was Eric; he was looking down at me with complete calm, and I could almost feel the confidence rolling off of him as a physical thing. I had no idea what was going on in his head, and I wished desperately I did. Did he have some back-up plan he hadn't told me about? Was he trying to give me courage to die bravely?

I switched my gaze from Eric to Felipe' and saw the King was staring right at me and holding the dark wooden stake lazily in one hand. I wanted to yell at him, demand that he release me and uphold his own order of protection, but I knew it wouldn't do me a bit of good. Just as he had the power to protect me, he also had the power to rescind that protection. It was good to be the King.

"So Miss Stackhouse," he said after a moment, and his beautifully accented voice did absolutely nothing for me right then. "What are we going to do with you?"

The vamps in black held me tightly, one gripping each of my arms. I looked at the female and she smiled at me, fangs descended. Then I looked at the male and got the same reaction.

"I'm going to drain her slowly," the female said softly, and she leaned in close to my neck and inhaled. "She smells sweet."

I sucked in a sharp breath and I felt my heart rate increase. I whipped my head back to the King, and he was smiling at my reaction. I looked up at Eric, pleaded with my eyes, trying to let him know that if he had a big escape plan in mind this would be a really good time to kick it off.

"I wonder if she'll taste as good as she smells," the tall, male vamp said and then he moved in very close, too close. I instinctively pulled away but his grip was tight and I barely moved an inch. "I can't wait to take her. She's so warm. I can feel her heat." He was still wearing the dark sunglasses, but I knew he was leering at me when he spoke the words.

And then the real panic set in. This was going to be bad; very, very bad.

My head whipped up to Eric, and his calm mask had cracked a bit. Bill's disgust and anger was almost tangible. I felt a tear leak from my eye. I tried to think, tried to figure out a way out of this mess. Maybe I could summon up my Fae magic again? I tried to calm down. I needed to concentrate if I was going to do this...

"I get the first bite," the female said.

"Dibs on the femoral," the male said, and he grabbed me roughly around the waist and pulled me into his chest.

And after that, any chance of my calming down flew right out the proverbial window. My heart was flying, beating like blades on a helicopter, and my breath was labored. I looked again at Felipe', desperate and scared and furious all at once, but his smile only increased.

Then several things happened at once.

The very air seemed to change, and I recognized a sound grinding away from across the room, a sound like sticks and rocks being stirred in a vat of glue. Every head in the room whipped towards the distinctive noise, including mine, and my eyes went wide as I saw a very familiar Bengal tiger charging right at me. Right behind the tiger, and just as impressive looking, came a huge black bear and behind that lumbering mountain of fur was a St. Bernard. Even in my shock and fear I had to feel kinda sorry for that guy. A tiger and a bear was a tough act to follow.

The vamps processed the scene even faster than I had, and they wasted no time at all. They burst into motion instantly, and I heard a cacophony of _pop pop pop_ as fangs descended. The two vamps in black released their grip on my arms and pushed me so hard that I lost my balance and landed on my butt. They sprang forward defensively, placing themselves in an intercept path between the shifters and the King.

I heard Eric growl in anger, and he said something almost under his breath, something I decided sounded less than appreciative of the shifter's intervention. He was still being held, but the guards that had hold of him were taking turns looking at one another and then toward the shifters in confusion.

Right about then, the three shifters broke ranks and went in various directions. The many guards throughout the room also split up and moved at vampire speed to engage the animals. The St. Bernard growled and barked, the bear roared loudly and Quinn's enormous canine teeth glistened frighteningly as he leapt through the air and landed solidly on Felipe' De Castro, also managing to pull down the two vamps in black that tried to stop him.

The King still had the stake in his hand and he swung it up at the weretiger's head, but Quinn caught his arm in his massive teeth and bit down hard and shook. The King screamed out something in Spanish and the guards that were holding Eric let him go and moved to help their master.

Eric grabbed me around the waist and lifted me effortlessly into his arms. I looked into his eyes, then whipped my head from side to side, trying to understand exactly what was happening. A couple of the perimeter guards must have decided Eric was in on the attack - and at this point, I didn't know that he _wasn't_ - and they ran toward us, one coming from the front, and another from behind. Their fangs were bared and they pulled out some type of bizarre looking firearms I didn't recognize from their jackets. I warned Eric, who was fixedly watching the King battle Quinn, of their approach.

"Hold on," Eric said, and he crouched slightly and his body tensed.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and buried my face in his chest, understanding what was coming. Just before the guards landed on us, Eric sprang straight up, causing the two charging guards to careen into one another like something out of a comedy. But once they recovered, they were anything but amused. I peeked down over Eric's arm and saw them raise their weapons at us. They fired, but instead of bullets, long strands of flimsy metal shot out from the barrels - silver, I guessed - and the dual strands rocketed at us at lightening speed.

"Eric!" I screamed, but he was already moving, spinning in the air and diving away. The silver missed us by inches.

Eric cursed and said something that sounded like 'damn, unthinking shifters'. His face was a mixture of fury and annoyance as he flew toward the opposite side of the room. As we went, I took a moment to observe the chaos happening below us. Quinn was still on top of the King and clearly in a battle rage. Half a dozen vamp guards were on him, biting and clawing at him, and blood splattered all around the area.

Bill was trying to help the vamp judges fend off an attack from the bear, and I was pleased to see that the fuzzy St. Bernard had succeeded in taking a large bite out of Victor Madden. Go dog!

It all happened so quickly, much faster than it takes to explain. In less than a minute, Eric landed us right beside Russell Edgington, who was still sitting in the same chair he occupied during the trial, and looking completely calm with one leg crossed over the other. His bodyguard was standing in front of him and he bared his teeth at Eric.

Eric set me on my feet by the King of Mississippi.

"I'll be back," Eric said, and I wasn't sure if he was talking to me or Russell. Maybe both of us.

Eric took off again, his movement just a blur to me eyes. I called after him and leaned forward over the railing that separated the spectator area from the main floor. Russell stood up beside me and placed his hand on my back. I whipped my head toward him.

"They're going to kill him!" I almost screamed.

Russell smiled at me gently. "I don't think your Viking is so easy to kill."

The words actually made me fell better, but only for a moment. I watched in horror as Eric slammed into the Tiger head on, the force of the blow giving the guards the extra boost they needed to finally tear the weretiger off the King. Eric, Quinn and all the guards rolled and tumbled away and Felipe' was on his feet in a heartbeat, bloodied but intact. He barked something at the guards, but I couldn't hear what it was over all the other sounds of fighting in the room.

"What is he doing?" I screamed at no one in particular. Before the chaos began, The King had been about to stake Eric, but now Eric was trying to _save _the King from the person that was trying to helps us? The whole situation was rapidly getting out of hand and beyond my comprehension. I looked over at Russell and he stood calmly, taking in the scene like watching a play. Okay, he was going to be zero help here.

At some point the St. Bernard had been injured, badly enough that he had shifted back to his human form, and the bear had given up his own fight to take up a defensive stance over his fallen friend.

Quinn, still in his beautiful tiger form, was being beaten, bitten and kicked and I raised my hand over my mouth and shook my head. This was too much, I realized. Too many people had been placed in harms way because of me, too many people had risked themselves to save me. I knew I couldn't just stand there and watch Quinn be killed for trying to fight for me, especially when the whole mess was very solidly my own fault.

Without another thought, I pushed myself over the railing and headed toward Eric. I vaguely heard Russell calling to me, but I ignored him. As I ran I saw the vamp guards with the silver shooting guns taking aim at Eric again, but they were hesitant because he was in the middle of a bunch of their pals and they didn't want to risk hitting the wrong person.

Felipe' was standing back watching Quinn, who was now completely subdued and covered in blood, being taken down by his guards and Eric. I ran to the King and stood right in front of him.

"Stop this!" I demanded, and the handsome King only barely glanced at me. He growled something I didn't understand and stepped around me, barking out orders in Spanish and waving his hand at Quinn in anger.

I clenched my hands in frustration and started after him again, but the vamps in black saw me coming and grabbed me just as they had before. At the same moment, Quinn shivered and shuddered and in the next instant he had fully reverted back to his human, and very naked, form. Seeing Quinn fall caused the last shifter, the bear, to give up his fight. He willingly returned to human form and was instantly taken by the vamp guards. He and his badly injured comrade were drug across the room and thrown down on the ground near Quinn. As soon as all the shifters were under their control, the guards turned on Eric and placed him back in custody.

Great. We were right back in the same situation we had been in before Quinn had decided to intervene, only now everyone was a lot less tidy looking.

I glanced at Quinn, lying battered and unconscious on the floor, then looked at Eric, being held by a contingent of guards. Felipe' was still swearing under his breath as he brushed off his clothes, and he slowly walked over and picked up the stake he had discarded at some point during the battle. He looked down at the shifters with derision and said something about Quinn being lucky he was worth more alive than dead.

I rallied, summoned my courage, and pulled forward against the grip of the vamps that held me.

"King De Castro!" I called out loudly, and he turned to look at me. I caught Eric's eyes for a moment, and he shook his head at me in warning. I ignored him. I was going to end this. Right now.

"Miss Stackhouse?" the King answered impatiently, and he looked at me with a raised eyebrow. I squeezed my eyes shut, said a silent prayer, then opened them and gazed solidly at the handsome King.

"I admit to the charges," I said loudly. "Victor is telling the truth about me."

"Sookie," Eric said sharply and his eyes were hard as nails.

"No!" I screamed at him, and then I looked back at the King, and the words just poured out of me. "Eric didn't know, I swear he didn't. I never told anyone what I could do. It's not fair that Eric be killed for my deception. He's a good Sheriff, and he's loyal to you. I'll take whatever punishment, but please don't let anyone else die because of me."

I heard laughter and my eyes snapped over to see Victor standing by the now-overturned judges table.

"It's too late for that," Victor said, and he was almost foaming with satisfaction. "The verdict has been rendered and the Viking will die for his treason. The pathetic pleading of a human bears no weight here."

I looked at the King, who was staring intently as Victor.

"I believe I am the one to determine what does and does not bear weight in my Kingdom," he said, a distinct edge in his voice. Then he looked back to me and stepped very close.

"Tell me plainly, Miss Stackhouse, to what charges are you admitting guilt?"

I looked at Eric, and I knew he was beyond furious with me. His anger was rolling through the bond, and he was pressing on my mind, willing me to be silent. Well, it was too late for that. I met Felipe's eyes again and mustered up as much dignity as I could under the circumstances.

"I can read vampire minds," I said firmly, and the silence in the room was tangible.

The King raised one eyebrow.

"No, my dear," he crooned. "You cannot."

There was a small moment of silence, and I looked from the King, who appeared slightly amused, to Eric, who looked relieved, to the vamp guards that were looking at each other, then back again.

"Master," Victor said cautiously, stepping forward. "She admitted it herself."

"She admitted to it with her words, yes," Felipe' said, and he made a point of looking around and scanning the eyes of every one of the vampires as he spoke. "But her heart, and her lungs, the human parts that cannot lie, tell me the truth."

Felipe' nodded at the two vamps in black that held me, and they released their grip. I winced, feeling the blood painfully begin to flow back into my extremities. I wasn't exactly sure what was happening here, but it sure seemed like the situation had taken a turn for the better. Eric nodded at me, and my two vamp guards removed their sunglasses for the first time and went to stand beside their King.

"What's going on?" I asked softly, and I took several steps backward until I hit something cool and solid behind me. It was Bill. I glanced up at him and he was looking at Felipe', who was now facing the three judge vampires and twirling the stake in one hand in an absent manner.

"My friends, I thank you for your service here today." He gestured at the demon lawyer. "As I'm sure Mr. Cataliades will remind you, according to our laws I still retain the final authority over the fate of those accused of crimes in my Kingdom."

He stopped and glanced back at Quinn, who was moaning slightly and regaining consciousness, and frowned.

"As I was trying to say before I was interrupted, I did not become King by being a fool. I have lived a long life and have seen many changes, but a few things have remained constant. One is the nature of humans." Felipe gave me a pointed glance. "And another is the nature of vampires." That time he looked at Victor.

"I'm sure you all noticed how Miss Stackhouse reacted to the words and threats of my guards," Felipe' nodded to the two vamps that had been dogging my every move since I arrived in Nevada. "Her heart rate, breathing, and even her body temperature increased, yes?"

I frowned, feeling a little embarrassed. I sometimes forgot that vampires, with their keen senses, could pick up on even the slightest alteration in physical processes. I recalled how I grabbed the attention of every vamp in Eric's office once when, in fear, my heart skipped a single beat.

"My guards, under my orders, have been trying to..._talk_...to Miss Stackhouse all evening. Is this correct, my friends?"

The vamps in black nodded their agreement, and cast a glance at me and the pieces started to fall into place. No wonder they had been staring holes through me all night, they were threatening me in their mind, trying to get a reaction. I nearly smiled then. Nearly. I shuddered, considering all the things they may had been _thinking_ at me to try and provoke a reaction. Thankfully, the vamps had been one hundred percent silent to me.

While my brain was putting it all together, the King was going on. "She showed absolutely no physical response until the words were spoken aloud. And after considering the words of Bill Compton concerning the ease of his deception against Miss Stackhouse, no, my friends," he gestured to me. "This one is no threat to our kind. That is my decision, and I order the matter to be closed."

"But Felipe'," Victor said, and he was almost wailing. "She admitted her guilt!"

"Yes," the King replied, "and I suspect she did so in hopes that I would spare Eric's life."

The three vampire judges spoke quietly to one another, but I kept my eyes fixed on Victor. He was fuming, that was plain to see, but he wisely kept his mouth shut. I could almost see the wheels turning in his head, and the cocky smirk that had been plastered on his face had disappeared.

"What of Sheriff Northman?" Mr. Cataliades asked, and I was glad he did.

Felipe' turned to Eric and the two vampires regarded one another in silence for a long while. I got the impression there was a lot going on between them even though they weren't saying a thing.

"It would be a very clever vampire indeed," the King said slowly, never taking his eyes from Eric, "that could manage to use an ability that does not appear to exist, to further his own advantage."

There was a pause, and I held my breath.

"Release him," Felipe' stated with a snap of his fingers, and the guards that had been restraining Eric let him go.

I sighed loudly and couldn't restrain a broad smile. Eric bowed at the neck to the King, thanked him formally, then turned his gaze to Victor and pointed at him.

"He's mine," Eric said in a voice so cold it would have scared the life out of anyone that was actually alive.

"Eric is within his rights to demand restitution for the honor violation," Mr. Cataliades stated before anyone could object. "Unless Victor still insists the feeding was voluntary, in which case Victor is entitled to a hearing."

The atmosphere in the room had definitely, from what I could tell, taken a turn against Victor. If anyone had a problem with or disagreed with the King's decision to toss out the judges' decision against Eric and me, they were keeping it to themselves. Now that Eric and I had had been deemed innocent, it made Victor look really damn guilty.

But Victor was not about to go quietly into the night. He turned to Felipe' and his face feigned outrage.

"This is outrageous!" Victor thundered, and his held his arms out dramatically. "I have been in your service for over one hundred years, my King. Surely you will not take the word of a rogue killer and his lying human over mine. That woman," he pointed at me and shook his finger, "has been taught well by the Viking. She's deceptive, and canny. If I was wrong in my allegations, it was because I was a victim of some plot - probably a scheme orchestrated by Northman to get me out of the way so he could take over New Orleans and expand his power base."

Victor shook his head. "I plead with you, Felipe', not only as your lieutenant, but also as your friend, do not let this go so easily. There is something here with this woman, something unnatural that causes those of our blood to act against our nature where she is concerned."

I wanted to snort at Victor's rant. Was he still thinking he was going to win? I smiled a little, but when I looked at Eric, and Bill and then at the King my smile faded. All three wore deadly serious expressions.

"Eric formed a blood bond with her," Victor was saying. "Compton was ordered by Sophie Anne herself to seek her out, and even you Felipe' -you, who has spoken so vehemently in the past about the folly of granting protection to humans- did so for her! Think of me what you will, but do not dismiss these facts, I beg you. She is a danger to us."

I listened carefully, and kept my eyes fixed on the King, who was now holding the stake in one hand and smacking it lightly into the other, creating a light _tap tap tap_ sound that echoed loudly in the otherwise silent room. I got the impression something really big was getting ready to happen.

I glanced around and saw that Quinn had regained consciousness and he, and the other E(E)E shifters, had all risen to their feet and were very naked. I tried to keep my eyes from waffling, but what can I say? I took a glance (or two) and my respect for the St. Bernard guy increased substantially. Woof!

I caught a wave of amusement from Eric, and my face flushed crimson when I noticed he was looking at me looking at the shifters. I smiled a fraction and got back to the business of being serious. The King was still apparently deep in thought and Victor had surreptitiously taken several away from Eric during his diatribe. After a few more long minutes, the King appeared to come to some conclusion and he grunted with satisfaction.

"Eric," the King stated solemnly, "Victor will pay you restitution for his violation of your woman."

"It's not his money I want," Eric said, and his accent was very pronounced.

The King raised his eyebrows. "You would kill him? For the human?"

Eric's nostrils flared and he hesitated, but only for a moment. "I would."

"Then perhaps what Victor has stated here today is true, my friend," Felipe' said, and he came to stand in front of me. He kept his eyes on mine as he continued. "Perhaps there is indeed something about this woman that makes us forget our priorities. Perhaps it is something I should explore."

"She is mine," Eric stated firmly, and the words were absolutely loaded with threat. My eyes went wide and I shook my head when the implications of what was being said started to sink in.

"And you are in my service, Eric," Felipe' countered and he snapped his fingers. The two vamps in black were at his side immediately.

"Set up accommodations for Miss Stackhouse," the King said, never removing his eyes from mine. "She will be staying with us."

"Felipe'...." Eric said in a deep voice but I cut him off.

"Oh, no I'm not!" I said, and I took a step back. I summoned up some righteous rage. What gave this guy the idea that he could tell me what to do, anyway?

"You better not touch me," I warned him, and he smiled gently.

"Of course not, my dear. I may be King, but I still abide by our traditions." He bowed at me, then, actually bowed and I took the opportunity to look over his head at Eric. My Viking shook his head slightly, and I felt a gentle tug in my mind that I recognized. He was calling to me.

I wrinkled my brow in confusion. I knew he used the call to send a message to Pam once. Was that was he was trying to do here? Was he trying to tell me something? Did he want me to do something? Say something? Kick Felipe' in the balls, maybe? Crap!

"Look," I said, forcing my voice to lower a notch. "I've got a job. I've got a house. I can't stay here."

"You will be well compensated for the inconvenience."

Inconvenience? Was this guy even on the same planet as I was?

"I don't think you fully understand the situation," Felipe' said, and his accented voice took on an undercurrent of steel. "I am going to spare your life tonight, yours and Eric's, because I am not convinced that the charges brought against you were true. But that in no way implies that I trust either of you. Eric has shown himself to be impulsive where you are concerned."

The King cocked his head to the side. "With you here, working for me, I will be able to more fully ascertain and utilize your abilities. And at the same time, Eric, I suspect, will be quite motivated to maintain his loyalty." The King grinned broadly, and I saw his fangs had run down some. He was clearly happy with his own cleverness. I was not. He began to walk away, and I understood he believed the matter was settled. I felt frustration and fear bubbling up.

"Eric," I said feebly and he was at my side in an instant, looking down at me with an absolutely unreadable expression.

"Will you trust me?" he asked me, and he said it so softly I almost had to read his lips to understand the words.

I searched his face and his eyes, and I suddenly remembered the words Pam had spoken to me many nights before, the ones she asked me to recall. She told me I needed to trust Eric.

My Viking raised an eyebrow at me, waiting. I nodded slowly.

"My King," Eric called loudly, and Felipe' turned back around quickly, his cape whipping around him.

"I've made my decision," the King said in a bored voice. "Go back to your Area, Eric. Maintain your allegiance, rebuild your bar, make it more profitable than ever and enjoy the life I spared. Do these things and your woman will not be harmed."

"You said you would honor our traditions," Eric said, taking a few steps closer to the King. "Will you also obey our laws?"

Felipe' raised his chin a fraction. He paused, and I knew he was trying, as I was, to figure out where Eric was heading with these questions.

"Of course," he answered.

Eric smiled slightly, and something about his face at that moment just screamed 'gotcha'. I watched him carefully, wondering what he was up to. I turned to Bill and gave him a questioning look. He shrugged.

"Then I respectfully submit to you, my King, that Sookie can not be taken from me. We are bonded."

The King was unimpressed, and he waved a hand. "Yes, yes, the blood bond, I know. It's powerful, I admit, but I'm afraid it does not negate my rights to conscript your woman into my service."

"I'm not speaking about the blood bond," Eric said. "I'm referring to our Covenant by ceremony."

I had no idea what that meant, but everyone else apparently did. Bill hissed beside me, Quinn's head jerked in my direction and the King went instantly rigid and completely still.

Mr Cataliades cleared his throat. "In the case of a ceremonial Covenant, the human may only be conscripted by a formal request made through....."

"I know the law," The King interrupted, and he looked none too happy that he did. His eyes were black as coal, and just as hard.

"He's lying, obviously!" Victor said, and I had to admit I had almost forgotten about him with everything else that was going on. "This is just another ruse! Felipe', surely you must see the deception now. He's trying to find a way to circumvent your orders. He's devious, as I warned you."

"If this is true, Eric, why have you not informed me sooner?"

I looked at Eric, wondering the exact same thing. This was a big deal, obviously, and it involved me but I was at a loss to even begin to guess what Eric was talking about. I wanted to say something, ask something, but I felt Eric pressing on my mind as strong as he ever had. I held my tongue.

"It never came up," Eric said simply. "It occurred many months prior to your acquisition of Louisiana."

"And you said this Convenant was forged by ceremony?" the King asked.

"With the very ceremonial dagger I used to bind the Kings of Indiana and Mississippi," Eric answered with a nod toward Russell, and I had to bite the inside of my cheek to prevent myself from screaming in shock. "Unfortunately, the dagger was destroyed when the Pyramid was bombed," Eric added.

"Convenient," Victor said, and Eric shot him a dangerous look.

"There were witnesses to the ceremony?" Felipe' pressed.

"There were," Eric answered. "The Queen Sophie Anne's child, Andre, was witness. But as you know, he was killed during the bombing."

"Yet another convenience," Victor intoned, but he was silenced by a glower by the King.

My brain was working furiously to put this together. Andre forced Eric and I into a blood bond in Rhodes, but didn't Eric say he wasn't talking about the blood bond? And all this talk about the knife, what was that about? Eric had used the little knife to cut himself so I wouldn't have to bite him, and yes, he had used that knife during the marriage he presided over....

_The marriage?_

I sucked in a sharp breath and stared at Eric with my mouth hanging open. He couldn't have - he _wouldn't_ have- married me, right? No, I decided, I was missing something here, I must be. It was crazy; Eric and I never exchanged any vows. And even if vamps did things differently, there was no way Eric would have done something like that without letting me know. He had to be making this up to prevent Felipe' from keeping me in Las Vegas or...

"With your permission, there is a person here that can testify to the validity of the Covenant," Eric said, and that effectively put a damper on the good stream of denial I had going. I started making a mental list of things I was going to say to the Viking later, and most of it was decidedly not nice.

Eric nodded into the spectator section where the small contingent of witches were sitting. All three of them were leaning forward, taking in the events with varying degrees of interest. "I have asked Baako Edusai to meet me here tonight. He can support my claim, and if necessary, he can also prove it."

"Well, proof is a powerful thing, Eric," Felipe' said, and his tone had softened some. He motioned to the witch and called out to him respectfully. "Can I request your assistance in this matter, Mr. Edusai?"

"What's going on?' I breathed, not thinking anyone could hear me. But someone had.

"I'm not sure," Bill answered right in my ear. "Eric told me he was calling in the witch, but didn't tell me why. He called it his Ace, does that mean anything to you?"

"Ace in the hole," I whispered, remembering Eric's words from the night Louisiana was attacked by the Fellowship. He tried to explain something to me that night, but he never got the chance. My mind was spinning.

The robed witch stood, and walked slowly and almost regally to the very center of the room. The air around him seemed to pop and hum, and I wondered if he had cast a spell around himself to protect him from the vampires. If I was a witch, I probably would have.

"I'm not sure what benefit I can be to these proceedings," the witch said in a smooth and deep voice, heavily accented. "But Eric has generously requested my presence, and I will try to assist as I can."

I almost chuckled. I bet Eric's generosity extended more to Baako's bank account than his presence.

"The dagger that was used to form the Covenant was spellbound by Baako," Eric explained. "He can attest to the legitimacy of the ceremony."

"Yes," the witch stated, and his voice was full of power and authority, "I will attest to this. I was called upon to spellbind the dagger that was used in Rhodes. In fact, I was recently in New Orleans, as my services were requested to place a similar spell on another ancient blade, since the dagger in question was, in fact, lost."

"And what exactly did the spell on the original dagger entail?" Felipe' asked curiously.

"It was a standard weave for vampire ceremonies; complicated and overly elaborate," Baako said, and held his hands out to his sides. "The spell was designed to bind one individual to another for a period of one hundred years. During that time, the individual under the spell may not be bound to any other, and they will be compelled to place the welfare of the other second only to their own. It is permanent, and it is unbreakable, except through final death."

I was almost shaking with the effort of keeping silent. What he said sounded really close to the vows I remembered being spoken at Russell and Bartlett's marriage. Did he really say one hundred years? And what was all that about being compelled? Sweet Jesus, I was just barely getting used to the complication in the blood bond, now I had to worry about being pulled around by some magical spell?

And being a vampire priest, Eric most certainly knew about the implications of using that knife. I was almost fuming at his sheer gall, and at his blatant deception. Spell or no spell, the only thing I was feeling compelled to do right then was grab the stake from Felipe' and use it on Eric. Okay, maybe I wouldn't actually kill him with it, but I would sure be happy to beat him with it for a while.

"The enchant was designed to work in tangent with a ceremonial cloak and an ordained member of a recognized church," Baako was explaining. "When those three requirements are present in close proximity, the spell will activate when the blade touches blood."

And right then my outrage was stopped dead in its tracks. Eric _was_ a priest, sort of, and he _was_ wearing a special cloak, but what was that bit about the blade and the blood? Eric bit me, he didn't cut me. That knife never touched _my_ blood, only Eric's. Was I not under the effects of the spell, then? My eyes went from Eric to Baako and back again.

Felipe' looked at me curiously, noted my confused expression, then turned to Eric. "And you are alleging that you used this ceremonial dagger on yourself and Miss Stackhouse during your stay in Rhodes, to form a mutual Covenant?"

"I am," Eric replied.

"Miss Stackhouse?" the King asked, and I felt like the proverbial deer in the headlights. What could I say here? If I lied, I was basically announcing I was married to Eric - not the worst thing in the world, but certainly not something I was ready for! But if I told the truth, I would soon find myself a permanent resident of the greedy city of Las Vegas.

I didn't look at Eric, but I felt the pull in my mind, the gentle tug of his call, willing me to come to him; willing me to his side.

I was going to kick his gorgeous ass for this later.

"Yes," I said firmly, "I have a Covenant with Eric, just like he said."

The King seemed to consider this, and he paced the floor slowly with his head bowed. He was still holding the stake and he spun it in his hands as he walked. Finally he appeared to make a decision.

"You have a convincing argument, Eric, but you can offer no real proof. The dagger is missing, and the only witness has gone to his final death." Then the King shook his head and his eyes turned to slits. "This is quite a coincidence, and too much is at stake for me to simply give you the benefit of the doubt. Without proof of, or a witness to this...."

"I can bear witness to the ceremony!"

Everyone in the room turned at the sound of Quinn's voice, and I was relieved to see someone had the good sense to let him have the black velvet cloth that had been on the table earlier. Quinn had it wrapped loosely around his waist now, and somehow he made it look good.

"I was in Rhodes," Quinn said, stepping forward, then stopping when two guards grabbed his arms. "I was hired to oversee the trial of Queen Sophie Anne, and I also offered my services for the marriage."

"And how does this make you a witness to Eric's claims?" the King asked, and Quinn gave me a pointed stare.

"After the marriage of the Kings, I went looking for Eric to retrieve the ceremonial robe and the knife. I found him with Sookie, and they were just completing the Covenant ceremony when I arrived. Andre was there as well, as Eric stated."

I silently thanked Quinn, and I felt annoyance trickle through the blood bond. Eric, once again, was going to have to owe a great big thank you to yet another of my ex-boyfriends and I knew it was chapping his butt. Well, he could just deal with it as far as I was concerned.

"I remember being angry that my equipment had been used without my permission, and without my company being properly compensated," Quinn added, putting just the right amount of irritation in his voice to give the lie credibility. Nice touch.

Oh, yes, Eric was going to have to pay up.

Felipe' looked around, caught my eyes, and Eric's, then turned to the three vamp judges who were looking back at him expectantly. The King was in a bad spot, I realized. He didn't want to have to let me go, but he had sworn in front of vampire witnesses from other Kingdoms and his own people that he obeyed vampire tradition and laws. Eric had maneuvered the handsome King into a corner, it seemed.

"Very well, Eric. I happily acknowledge your formal Covenant with Miss Stackhouse," Felipe' said, and though he was smiling it was pretty obvious he was anything but happy. "She may remain in your Area, under your protection."

"And what of Victor?" Eric asked before I even had a chance to be excited about be allowed to go back home.

Felipe' frowned.

"I've already made my decision. Give him an amount, I will make sure he pays you."

Eric smiled in a fangy way. "That was before you acknowledged my true bond with Sookie, my King. Victor's crime goes beyond a simple breach in tradition. She is mine by blood, and by law. He violated a sacred Covenant."

A substantial pause ensued.

"So it would seem," Felipe' finally said softly.

"Outrageous!" Victor bellowed, and I could almost see the steam coming from his head he was so mad. "None of us knew of this alleged Covenant until this night!"

"Is ignorance of the law now an excuse to break it in our Kingdom?" Bill asked calmly.

"He's mine," Eric said for the second time, and he smiled at Victor.

"I'm not sure I am prepared to send one of my most loyal Sheriffs to his final death for a human," Felipe' stated.

I probably wasn't as offended as I should have been, but that was okay because Eric was offended enough for both of us.

"He was going to turn her," Eric said. "He wanted to take her as his own to give him an advantage over you, Felipe'. It's treason we're talking here."

"Lies!" Victor thundered, and the guards moved to place themselves in position to attack if things got out of control. "Prove that allegation at a trial, Northman, if you dare!"

And for a few tense moments it looked a lot like things were going to get out of control. Eric was poised to attack, Victor was looking equally violent and Felipe' appeared ready to stake them both out of sheer frustration.

Then a cell phone started ringing and I recognized the tone.

_Blue Suede Shoes._

"Oh," Russell said, looking almost sheepish. "I do apologize, but I believe that's me," and he opened up his jacket and pulled out a little black flip phone while everyone just stared at him.

I heard the King mumbling about modern technology and old fashioned rudeness. But at least the interruption served to calm the atmosphere somewhat.

I watched as Russell spoke to whoever was calling him for few moments, then he walked over and extended the phone to Bill with a bemused expression.

"It's for you," he said.

_To be continued_

_~ I almost ripped out this whole plot line after reading DaG, but decided to just let it roll! Thanks for reading, and for the wonderful reviews! xoxo And to my most wonderful Beta, I'm so happy to have you back! ((hugs))_


	28. Chapter 28

_A/N I usually put these at the bottom, but I'm putting it way up top here this time because I owe y'all an apology for my delay. My laptop died, taking the bulk of this chapter with it. I spent a good amount of time crying and wailing and gnashing my teeth, then spent even more time pouting before I finally decided to suck it up and start re-writing. Anyway, if anyone is still reading this after a three week hiatus, thank you and I hope you enjoy!_

**Know Thyself**

**Chapter Twenty Eight**

Bill took the phone from Russell with complete calm, like it was a perfectly normal, everyday occurrence for him to get a call on a vampire King's cell, while he was in the middle of another vampire King's stronghold. He put the phone to his ear while the rest of us just sort of stood there and waited. Glances were exchanged, eyebrows were raised and I knew everyone's ears were perked.

"Bill Compton," Bill said, and he took several steps away from the group, perhaps in an attempt to gain some privacy. Highly unlikely, given this particular group.

I watched his face carefully, but Bill's expression did not betray so much as a hint of who might be on the other end of the line. I risked a quick glance at Felipe' and he was doing that vampire fixed stare trick they were all so fond of. The only one I was getting any sort of read on was Eric, because his emotions were trickling out through our bond. He was anxious, but for what I didn't know. Anxious about the call? Anxious to get on with staking Victor? I had no clue. He and I were going to need to work on our communication issues.

Bill was speaking softly, and even my human ears were able to pick up a few words. There were a lot of one word answers; yes and no mostly, and Bill nodded a few times.

I was so tense and frightened about what was going to happen I very nearly screamed 'who is it?' a few times. I mean, seriously, what could really be more important than what was happening here?

Thankfully it wasn't too long before Bill slapped the phone shut and handed it back to Russell, who placed it back in an inside pocket of his jacket. Felipe used the stake he was holding to slap his leg in impatience.

"I apologize for the interruption," Bill said sincerely, allowing a little flash of his (very) old-school charm to show.

"Would you care to explain what was so urgent that you deemed it necessary to delay us?" Felipe' asked, and from what I could tell he was genuinely more curious than angry. I suspected that was the general consensus of everyone else, as well.

"I've been doing some research on your behalf," Bill stated, and he inclined his head a fraction to the King. "Concerning the attacks in Louisiana. I enlisted the help of one of Russell's people, and that was what the call regarded."

The King instantly perked up at this information, and any lingering irritation he held about the breach in etiquette was quickly forgotten. He was hot to find the ones that had attacked his state and cost him both personnel and income, and for a moment I almost felt sorry for the idiots that did it. The vamps were hunting them down, and eventually they would be caught. And I didn't think Felipe' and his crew would be making citizens arrests and handing the perpetrators over to the proper authorities when they found them, either. Eric had told me not to concern myself with those 'mundane details' and I decided to take that advice. There were some things I really didn't want to know.

"You have information?" Felipe' asked and he stood taller.

"Possibly, yes," Bill affirmed, and he started to say something else but the King waved a hand to silence him.

"We can talk after I've concluded the trial," Felipe' stated, and I noticed Bill's cheek flinched and he exchanged a glance with Eric.

"If I'm no longer needed here," Bill continued, and his tone was respectful, "I could return to the waiting room and prepare the documents so I can brief you properly."

The King seemed to barely hear the words and he waved a hand dismissively. "Go ahead Compton," he said and snapped a finger at a pair of nearby guards. "Escort him. And take our wayward shifter friends here with you. See to it they are properly clothed. If any of them attempts to shift or leave, you are under orders to kill them."

Felipe' cast a no-nonsense glare at Quinn, and I could see in the weretiger's face that he had no intention of making another vigilante charge. Whether it was because he knew he had made a mistake the first time, or because he was too injured I wasn't sure. Either way, I was relieved. From what the King had said, he was going to spare Quinn if for no other reason than because he was worth his weight in gold in the pits. Quinn had people that depended on him, he didn't need to be risking himself, especially not for me. But I wouldn't soon forget the gesture.

A thought came to me that I had one heck of a long list of people to thank after tonight.

The guards tugged at them, and the three shifters stood and limped quietly toward the door. Bill bowed a little from the waist before turning and heading in the same direction. When the door slammed shut behind them the sound resonated loudly. Now that a good portion of my support had left, I felt curiously vulnerable. Instinctively, I looked up at Eric and he met my eyes. His were shining and clear and confident, and it helped to ease my insecurity.

Felipe stepped forward and scanned the remaining crowd that was still standing around in the middle of the room.

"Let's finish this business," he said, and his tone had taken a turn to the fiery. A couple guards righted the long table that been overturned, and the three judges returned to their positions. Russell and his bodyguard returned to their seats in the spectator section, and the contingent of witches did the same.

I watched Baako as he walked away, his colorful robes fluttering behind him. I was going to have to find a way to get him alone later. I had some questions about that knife and the spell and though I hated to admit it, I wasn't sure I could trust Eric to give me the whole story. I didn't think he'd actually lie to me, not entirely, but I didn't doubt he could put a spin on the truth. And the amusing thing was that Eric would be the first one to admit to that.

"Eric, I want you to give me an amount," Felipe' stated, and his voice was full of authority and his tone made it clear he wasn't going to budge on his decision. "Victor committed an honor violation in regards to your woman. Covenant or not, I will not watch one of my vampires be sent to final death for the sake of a human."

Eric seemed to stand a little taller, his face clamped down and he became absolutely motionless. He wasn't happy, oh no, but he was wise enough not to challenge the King. I breathed a sigh of relief. I wasn't thrilled about Victor walking out of here either, but Eric and I were barely escaping this trial intact. I didn't know about my vampire, but I was ready to grab the win and bolt before anyone decided to change their minds.

The silence dragged a bit and Felipe' shook his head in exasperation.

"Very well," the King stated. "If you won't set a price, I will set it for you." He turned to his lieutenant. "Victor, it is my ruling that you pay Eric an amount equal to one month's income."

Victor's eyes went wide and he puffed up like a peacock, but he didn't argue. I wondered if he was literally biting his own tongue off to keep quiet.

"Is this acceptable to you, Eric?" Felipe' asked, and I held my breath. I was begging Eric silently to just say yes so we could get out of here.

"I accept the ruling of my King," Eric stated, which wasn't really answering the question at all, but wasn't exactly _not_ answering it, either. I wondered if there were vampire classes in how to sound cryptic and ambiguous. If so, Eric had undoubtedly aced it.

"Very good," Felipe' said, and he walked over and tossed the stake down on the rolling table. "Victor, you will have that payment delivered to Eric within three nights or you will answer to me."

He turned to the three judges and smiled brilliantly, switching from Ruthless King to Magnanimous Host smoothly.

"I thank you again for coming on such short notice. Please feel free to enjoy the hospitality of my casino. Drinks are on me tonight, my friends!"

The judges rose and smiled, and there was a light smattering of chuckles. Vampire humor. Fun times.

The atmosphere in the room began to change as vampires began moving and talking quietly in small groups. I looked for Eric and saw he was staring across the room at Victor with an unwavering gaze. I moved to stand beside him, and I tentatively reached out and lightly touched his hand with my fingers. He didn't move, or even acknowledge my presence.

"It's over," I said softly, and I squeezed his forearm. "Let's go. Please."

"Not yet," he answered, but he didn't look at me.

"Why not?" I demanded. "What are we waiting for? Forget about Victor."

"No."

"Eric," the King's voice startled me. I hadn't heard him approach. I turned to Felipe' and Eric did likewise.

"I know this didn't turn out as you planned," the King stated, raising his eyebrows.

"I planned nothing," Eric replied simply.

"Didn't you?" Felipe' laughed. "My friend, you always have a plan. It's one of the reasons I kept you on in my service." Then the King turned serious. "Take Madden's payment, Eric. Use it to rebuild Fangtasia. Have a new Grand Opening! People love those, you'll make a fortune!"

"And so will you," Eric replied, and I saw his lip pull back in a slight grin.

"As it should be," Felipe' said, then he frowned. "The human radicals have cost me dearly in your state. Now that you're heading home, I will expect your assistance in their apprehension."

"Of course," Eric agreed immediately, and I hoped that was the end of the conversation. But it wasn't.

"Ah!" Felipe' exclaimed and looked past my shoulder. "Here comes Compton. Perhaps he has some news in relation to the matter."

I turned and watched Bill approach. Yasuka was right on his heels, and she was holding what looked like a file folder in her hand. She glanced around the room with curious eyes, and her expression was openly excited.

Bill nodded to Eric first, and I wondered briefly if that was some sort of vampire faux pas, because the King looked a little taken aback.

"We were just discussing the situation on Louisiana," Felipe' told Bill slowly. "Did your mysterious caller send you anything of value?"

"He did, yes," Bill answered, and he nodded to Yasuka who handed over the folder. The king took it, held it open in one hand and began flipping through the pages. His eyes scanned each page, much faster than a human could manage, but then he frowned and shook his head.

"I'm not sure what I'm supposed to be seeing here, Bill," Felipe' said honestly.

"You know about the website we found? The one with the photos your Louisiana vampires?"

"Yes."

"There were several young human males arrested not long ago in connection with the attack on Sookie."

"The car wreck?"

Bill nodded. "They have also admitted their part in some of the fires."

Felipe's head jerked up. "Where are they?" he demanded, and his fangs ran out a bit.

"In custody of the human authorities at the moment. Because they are juveniles, they are being lenient with them in exchange for their cooperation. They have all admitted being recruited by the individual that runs that website."

Bill pointed to name on one of the papers.

"It took a while to track, but we were finally able to get the name of the person."

Felipe's eyes narrowed and his face when as white as any vampire I'd ever seen. I surreptitiously raised up on my toes a little to try and get a glimpse at the page.

"But New Orleans was hardest hit," the King said slowly, thoughtfully.

"In the number of attacks, yes," Eric interjected. "But it had the least amount of overall damage. No deaths, and not a single business or residence was destroyed as happened in every other area."

Felipe' just stared at the papers in his hand for a long time, perhaps a full minute. He had an absolutely unreadable expression on his face, but his posture was rigid, and if he had been human I had no doubt he would have been shaking with rage. I wasn't sure what had set him off, but I could almost see smoke coming from his ears. My survival instinct kicked in and I took two large steps away from him.

Finally, Felipe' appeared to make a decision. He shut the folder and slapped it against Bill's chest, then stalked several paces across the room.

"What's going on?" I whispered.

"Watch," Eric answered, his blue eyes fixed on the King.

I watched, but had no idea what I was looking for. The vampires were still milling around the area, and a quick scan of the room showed me that Quinn and the E(E)E gang were back and fully clothed, thank God. They were packing up their 'equipment' from the evening - one guy was rolling up the tarp while the other two were breaking down the makeshift throne Felipe' had used.

The witches were chatting with Russell Edgington about who knows what, and Victor was smiling and having a good old time with a large tangle of vampires made up of the judges and a few guards.

"What am I supposed to be watching?" I whispered frantically.

"Victor," Eric and Bill hissed at the same time, both sounding a little annoyed at having to explain. I cocked my head in irritation, but found Victor again and my eyes almost went dry because I was watching him so closely I was forgetting to blink.

"Todd Van Meric," Felipe' called out suddenly, and no one responded to the name at all.

Except one.

Victor's head snapped up instantly when he heard the name, but then it seemed like he suddenly remembered something and he turned quickly toward the nearest door.

"Don't even think about it," Felipe' warned in a deep, ominous voice, and he motioned for his guards.

I glanced up at Eric, and saw his fangs had run out and his eyes were almost sparkling with delight. Bill looked supremely satisfied. And I was trying to catch up.

"What's going on?" I asked, utterly exasperated. "Who's Todd Van Meric?"

"Victor," Eric and Bill hissed once again, and I let my head fall forward in defeat.

"It's an anagram," Bill whispered.

"For what?"

"Victor Madden. He used that alias many years ago. It's listed on his profile page in my database."

And then it all clicked, and my mouth popped open.

"That's the name on the paper?" I asked incredulously, and I reached over and grabbed the file folder out of Bill's hand and started thumbing through the pages. "Victor owns that website?"

"It appears so," Bill said.

"Why?" I breathed. "Why would he do that?"

"Why indeed, Miss Stackhouse," the King answered me from across the room. Another score for vampire hearing.

The guards had already taken hold of Victor, and to his credit he wasn't even bothering to struggle. They brought him to the center of the room and he stood in front of the King, acting shocked.

"What is the meaning of this?" Victor demanded, and the King raised one eyebrow.

"I knew your ambition would one day compromise your loyalty," Felipe' said, and his accent was very pronounced. "But I never would have guessed the depths to which you would sink."

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Felipe'," Victor said and in a move far too fast for my human eyes, the King landed a blow to his lieutenant's face that left a trail of red oozing from his nose.

"Do not speak to me in the familiar," the King said, raising a finger and pointing it in Victor's face. I made a mental note to never call the King by his first name. "And do not test my intelligence. Compton!"

Bill took the folder from me, and in an instant he was at the King's side.

"My friends," Felipe' said, raising the folder above his head, but keeping his eyes on Victor. "I have in my hand proof that this vampire, Victor Madden, has enlisted the aide of _humans_," he made a face then, like the word left a bad taste in his mouth, "to orchestrate attacks on vampires in his own state."

"Outrageous! This is a set-up!" Victor said, and he turned to glare at Bill. "Compton knows about computers, he could easily fabricate this so-called proof! He was probably hired by Northman to create that website himself!"

"Who said anything about a website?" Felipe' asked quietly, and it suddenly sounded like someone was tap dancing on bubble-wrap as every set of fangs in the room snapped out.

"Traitor!" one of the vamps shouted.

"Stake him!" said another, and then I couldn't hear anything more with clarity. The room had erupted in a frenzy.

Victor had his own OSM then, and he looked around frantically for some way out of the predicament he had gotten himself into. But from what I could see, he was out of luck in that area. Even Russell had jumped over the barrier and onto the main floor; teeth bared and crouched down like he was ready to pounce at any moment. Vampires, it seemed, were none too pleased when one of their own turned against them.

My initial elation as it dawned on me that Victor was in a heap of trouble subsided rapidly when I understood that I was but a fragile mortal in a room full of vampires with blood lust in their eyes. I stepped behind Eric, trying to become invisible.

"Did you know about this?" I whispered as silently as I could, and the only response I got was a rumbling chuckle.

I shook my head. Felipe' was right; Eric _always_ had a plan.

"Hold him," the King said, and two guards grabbed Victor- who was now fighting, and cursing, and swearing innocence- and held him up with his arms outstretched. They were pulling on his arms so strongly, I thought Victor's feet would actually come up off the ground.

Felipe' walked over to the table and retrieved the stake he had discarded earlier. He picked it up and looked at it for a long moment, ran his hand along the smooth wood almost like a caress. He headed toward Victor, but paused when he came within an arm's reach of Eric.

"This is a job for a butcher, not a King," Felipe' announced loudly, and he cast his dark eyes up to Eric and ceremoniously offered him the stake, holding it out to him with both hands. "He is yours," the King said solemnly.

And Eric didn't hesitate. He took hold of the stake with a slight nod, and I felt a tremendous surge of something wild and primal spill over through our bond. Eric was beyond thrilled with this turn of events, and even though I knew I should feel a little, I don't know, concerned or frightened, maybe, that my vampire lover was about to kill someone right in front of me, but I just couldn't muster the proper emotional response. Eric wanted this, he needed this and I wanted and needed it for him.

And that fact didn't bother me nearly as much as it probably should. I made a mental note of that.

"Very smart," Bill whispered at my shoulder, and I glanced at him curiously.

"Felipe' allowing Eric the kill. He doesn't have to, of course, but he knows it will please Eric. And it makes Felipe' look good, too."

"Right," I said softly. "Kings are too important to get their hands dirty."

"Exactly."

Eric walked slowly and deliberately toward Victor, who had ceased his antics and was now standing as tall as he could, looking defiant. I guessed he was resigned to his fate at this point and decided he didn't want to spend his final moments cowering. It was a very vampire response, and I found I actually felt a pang of respect for his courage.

For just a moment I remembered Godfrey, the ancient vampire that decided to meet the sun in Dallas after a life of horrible, vile deeds. I remembered too, how Godfrey had saved me from a brutal attack. It was one good deed after centuries of evil, but it had meant a great deal to me, and I had made the decision to be with him when he died. I remembered crying for him, even.

Not that any part of me was about to shed a tear for Victor, but there was still something painful in knowing a life was about to end. I wanted to turn away, but I found I just couldn't _not_ watch.

Eric stopped in front of Victor, maybe three feet away from him, and the room fell silent. Eric fell into a relaxed fighting stance and raised the stake, holding it high over his head with both hands. His eyes looked like they could burn holes straight through Victor. I felt a little dizzy and I realized I had been holding my breath. I exhaled in a slow puff, as quietly as I could. I had seen vamps die before, and it was ugly. A little piece of my head wondered why Felipe' didn't pull that tarp back out; he was going to get sludge on the pretty floor.

Victor glanced away, then, raised his eyes and I wondered if he was maybe saying a final prayer.

"Look at me," Eric demanded, and the command in his voice was so strong that Victor - to my amazement - actually complied.

"Get on with it," Victor said derisively.

Eric smiled.

"Gladly," he replied, and he brought the stake straight down toward Victor's chest, but at the last possible second he twisted and raised his leg. The stake came down hard on Eric's knee, breaking in half with a loud _crack_. He took the two broken halves of the stake and tossed them to the floor with great ceremony.

Vampires really seemed to do _everything_ with ceremony.

There was a collective gasp of surprise, the loudest coming from Victor himself, who stared wide-eyed at Eric and, for the first time, showed real fear.

"What is the meaning of this?" Felipe demanded, walking forward. Eric spun around to face the king.

"His life is mine," Eric stated, "I claim the right of Resolution by Challenge."

Felipe's eyebrows raised and I'm pretty sure mine did as well. The other vampires in the room displayed varying degrees of surprise, from mild to blatantly shocked, and everyone seemed to be looking right at the King. Including the _other_ King in the room, who I could swear looked almost giddy.

I looked at Bill, and saw his fangs were out and he was nearly salivating. No help there. I took a peek to my left and caught Quinn's eyes. He shook his head at me, but I had no idea what he was trying to say.

Finally, the King spoke, and he sounded as exasperated as any vampire I'd ever heard.

"Just stake the bastard, Eric," Felipe said, and for the first time all evening I found myself in wholehearted agreement with someone. I didn't have the first clue that this challenge thing was, but if it was like everything else vamps did, it was probably time consuming. All the pomp and circumstance and ritual was fine and good if you were immortal, but I had a finite life to live, and I was anxious to get on with it, far away from Nevada.

"His life is mine," Eric stated. "It's within my rights to claim the Challenge."

"That law_ is_ still on the record," Mr. Cataliades stated, and I had nearly forgotten the demon lawyer was even present. "It hasn't been used in a very long time....."

"Four centuries," Felipe' said, and his eyes narrowed.

"Do we even know the protocol for the Challenge?" one of the guards asked.

"We can check the books," Quinn answered.

Felipe' said something long and streaming in Spanish, then waved his hand at the weretiger.

"Very well," he said impatiently.

A hum of voices began to ensue then, and I saw Quinn and the other two shifters pull a large, leather bound book - no kidding, an actual book - out of a duffle bag with the E(E)E logo on the side, and begin flipping through the pages. Mr. Cataliades hovered behind them, and they all four were talking and debating, sometimes making animated gestures. The vampires looked very interested, and they slowly began to edge toward Quinn. The only ones not moving were the King, and Eric and, of course, Victor, who was still being held under guard.

I took advantage of the break in the proceedings and grabbed Bill by the arm.

"What the hell is going on?" I whispered.

"The King gave Victor's life to Eric," Bill said and I rolled my eyes and made a _hurry up and tell me something I don't already know _gesture with my hand.

"Instead of staking Victor, which is what generally always happens in these cases, Eric has invoked a very old right. He has basically challenged Victor to a duel."

My eyes went wide.

"A _duel_? You're kidding right?"

Bill cocked an eyebrow. "Not at all. I never actually witnessed it of course, since as Felipe' stated, it hasn't been used in four hundred years. But it was the most common form of conflict resolution for our kind long ago. Vampires as old as Eric remember it well. Most of them find our modern form of punishments to be...." Bill paused, like he was trying to find the right word. "Uncivilized."

I nearly laughed.

"Okay, so what's going to happen then? Eric and Victor are going to fight each other? With swords?"

"Not with swords, but they will battle to the death, yes."

"What weapon will they use then?"

Bill smiled grimly. "They won't need weapons."

I squinted in confusion for a second, but then I caught on and I raised my hand to my chest.

"And they think _staking_ is uncivilized?" I almost wailed.

I whipped my head to Eric, and the battle lust was all over him. His eyes had that dangerous and excited glow behind them, his muscles were tense, his fangs were glinting in the light and he looked every inch like some big, prehistoric predator.

Then I looked at Victor, and saw something on his face I didn't expect. _Hope. _

"Oh my God," I breathed, as the implications struck me full on. "What if Victor wins?"

"Doubtful," Bill stated.

"But it's possible, right?" I said, and I guess I said it a little too loudly. Eric was at my side in a instant. He placed his hands on my shoulders and bent down a little, looking me in the eyes.

"You're afraid," he said softly.

"Of course I'm afraid!" I hissed, looking around to make sure no one was listening in. "I want to get out of here! I want us both to get out of here!"

"We'll leave after the fight," Eric said, and he sounded remarkably unconcerned.

"What if you get killed?" I asked. "And don't tell me that won't happen!"

"That won't happen," Eric said, and he cocked his eyebrow. Was he really trying to tease me? _Now? _I wanted to grab him and shake him. Stupid, stubborn Viking vampire!

"Why are you doing this?" I demanded. "Just stake him! He'll be dead, and you'll be happy and we can _leave_!"

Eric frowned and looked at me for a long moment. "I'll never be _happy_ about what happened that brought us here, my lover. But being able to destroy him with my own hands will offer some consolation."

"Eric," I started to say but then he stood straight and dropped his hands to his sides.

"You would have me revoke the Challenge," he said, and there was a faint hint of near-despair in his voice. "You would ask this of me?"

I almost said yes. The word was on my tongue and pounding in my brain. I wanted him safe and in my arms and in my bed, back home in Louisiana. And somehow I knew that if I asked him to back down, he would. Maybe it was because of the spell from the knife, or because of the blood bond we shared, or maybe for other, even more mysterious reasons, but I somehow _knew_ he would do as I requested here.

That realization, that power, shook me to my core. But as I stood there looking at my vampire, I understood that I _couldn't_ ask it of him. He had done a lot of things in regards to me, perplexing and infuriating things, but not once had he ever asked me to be something other than what I was. I was human, and he swore he wouldn't change that. I was a telepath that could sometimes read his mind, and he accepted that, too. I was part Fae, and Lord knows he _loved_ that about me! But I was also stubborn, mistrustful, quick to anger; I was one, big, complicated and confusing package, but Eric took me just as I was.

Was I not going to do him the same for him?

A sense of peace enveloped me then. I smiled and peeked around to make sure we didn't have an audience, then reached up and touched his cheek.

"No," I said firmly. "I'll never ask you to be less than what you are."

Eric grinned broadly, a little eerie since he was still excited about the prospect of battle, then he kissed me very hard, so hard I tasted blood where his fangs cut into my lips. But I didn't care. He pulled away after a moment, and his tongue snaked out to lick up my blood that had transferred to his lips. His eyes went a little wild for a moment, then he said something in his old language - something he'd said before that I still didn't understand - and he turned and strode purposefully away.

"Eric," I called to him, and he turned back.

"Kick his ass."

I only mouthed the words, but Eric winked at me and I saw his chest move a little in silent laughter.

Right about then, Quinn and the tight circle of vamps that had all converged around the desk started to disperse, and Mr. Cataliades found the King and it appeared as though he was explaining something to him. Felipe' nodded several times, shook his head once and waved his arms no less than twice during the conversation.

The shifters were going around the room, clearing it out and making space. Bill and I stepped back until we were almost touching the wall, and before long the big, middle section of the floor was cleared, except for Eric, who stood silently, waiting for the King to make a decision.

Finally, Mr. Cataliades bowed and returned to a seat in the spectator section of the room near Russell, and Felipe' moved to stand by Eric. He raised his hands.

"Eric has chosen to claim the right of Resolution by Challenge. According to tradition and law, Victor will be be given the opportunity to either accept or refuse the challenge. Victor Madden, what say you?"

All eyes turned to Victor then, and for a moment I wondered if he would simply say no, and not accept.

"He won't refuse it," Bill whispered, as though he was answering my thoughts. "If he won't fight, Eric still has the right to stake him. At least with the challenge he has a chance."

"I accept the Challenge," Victor said loudly, and the two guards that were holding him released their grip. Victor walked to the middle of the room to join Felipe' and Eric. The whole thing reminded me a little of a boxing match. I wondered if Felipe' would rattle off the rules; no sucker punches, no hitting below the belt.

But the King moved off the floor then and Quinn, clearly in his role as Master of Ceremony, took his place and began to speak.

"Eric and Victor, in the presence of at least two witnesses, will fight one another to final death. Weapons are forbidden. Surrender is forbidden. Witnesses are forbidden to offer assistance to either combatant."

I looked around the room, and the excitement in the air was almost electric. It reminded me a little of how everyone acted when Alcide abjured that witch, Debbie Pelt. This was a rare event for the vampires, something most had never witnessed and probably never would again. I guess when you live for centuries, any change in routine is a treat.

Even the small contingent of witches seemed intrigued, and they all leaned forward in their seats, their eyes riveted on the events.

"Prepare yourselves," Quinn stated and Victor shrugged out of his jacket and loosened his tie. Eric proceeded to remove his nice, new shirt and he kicked off his shoes and socks. I felt a little perverse just then, because despite the severity of the situation I couldn't help but feel a wave of lust seeing my vampire standing there half dressed. He was glorious, and brave and he was _mine!_

Victor took the hint from Eric's playbook and pulled off his own shirt and shoes. I was a little surprised to see that Victor was solidly built, much more so than I would have guessed. He had powerful arms and shoulders, and without the suit and tie he looked surprisingly like, well, like a vampire.

"How old is Victor?" I asked Bill.

"Older than me by about a century," he answered, and I nodded.

"Sookie," Bill said, and something in his tone made me tear my eyes away from Eric and look at him.

"This won't be pretty," he warned me.

"It never is," I answered quietly, and I turned back to Eric.

Quinn stood between the two vampires, and he raised one hand over his head.

"The Challenge will commence on my mark," he declared, and he looked at each vampire in turn.

Eric crouched, bending his knees slightly, and his large hands curved into claws. Victor's stance was lower, he was nearly touching the ground, and he placed one hand on the floor in front of him, almost like a runner ready to push off the block.

"Fight!" Quinn exclaimed, and at the same time he brought his raised arm straight down. He backed away quickly at the two vampires reacted without hesitation, launching themselves at one another and connecting in a tangle of arms and fangs.

They were moving so fast, too fast for me to get a really good look at what was happening. It started out as almost a typical brawl, with blows being hurled and landed, but then it quickly turned bloody.

I saw Eric grab Victor and toss him to the ground hard, but then somehow Victor was up again and had managed to sink his teeth into the back of Eric's arm. I cringed when I saw the blood begin to flow; it looked so bright against his pale skin and I immediately felt a phantom pain in my own arm, like what was happening to Eric was happening to me.

And that probably explained the reason I was instantly and completely infuriated. I took a step forward, but didn't even realize I'd done it until Bill pulled me back.

Eric used his longer reach to his advantage and he turned at the waist and reached behind him to grab Victor's arms and propel him up and over his shoulder. This time Eric came down on top of him, and without a seconds hesitation, sunk his fangs into Victor's neck.

Victor yelled, Eric growled, and I heard the sound of flesh being torn when Eric yanked his head back. He spit a chunk of something out onto the floor, and his mouth was covered in blood. But Victor used the opportunity to his advantage. When Eric turned his head, Victor raised up and bit hard into Eric's shoulder. Eric grabbed Victor by the throat and I saw the muscles in his arms tighten and he squeezed and slammed Victor's head into the ground several times, but Victor never released his bite hold. Blood was pouring from the wound now, and Victor was shaking his head like a pit bull, tearing Eric's flesh.

Eric grabbed Victor's arm that was closest to him and bit down right above the wrist. It was hard to see, but it looked like Eric was almost chewing, and as it turned out that was exactly what he was doing. Victor finally let go of Eric's shoulder, screaming, but it was too late. Eric jumped to his feel and when he did I saw that he had torn off Victor's arm below the elbow. It was still in his mouth, blood and flesh trailing from the severed end, and Eric grabbed it and tossed in down.

Victor was clearly in great pain, but he struggled to his feet, swaying slightly. He eyed Eric warily, and I wondered what was going on in the mind of a person who knew he was beaten.

Eric didn't allow Victor much time to think on his plight, however; he was back on him in a instant, clawing and biting and tearing. There was so much blood now, and I raised my hand to my mouth in revulsion.

I could feel Eric's emotions, and I didn't think there were even words that could describe what he was feeling. It looked like rage, or vengeance, but I knew it wasn't, not really. There was something beyond primal there, something instinctive and predatory that my human mind couldn't even fathom. It was vampire nature in all it's glory and horror, pure and undiluted by the mores of human society. It was brutal, and fascinating and terrifying.

After what seemed like a long time, but was probably really only a few minutes, the battle all but ceased. Eric was standing in the middle of the room, barely recognizable through the gore on his clothes and body. He was looking down on Victor, who was literally in pieces on the floor, but still moving and moaning.

"Your life is mine," Eric said, and his voice was heavy and accented. "I could allow you to live, Madden. Your limbs will grow back, eventually. Years in agony might do you some good. And I'd enjoy watching you suffer."

Victor managed to rally himself a little, and he hurled a curse. I watched Eric carefully, I couldn't take my eyes off of him.

Eric reached down and grabbed Victor by the hair and hauled him to his feet. Foot actually, since he was missing his left leg at the thigh entirely. I watched as Eric leaned in and whispered something in Victor's ear. I had no idea what he said, but Victor's head turned a little and it seemed like he was looking right at me.

Then Eric yelled something I didn't understand, reared back and buried his fangs in Victor's neck, while at the same time using both his hands to twist Victor's head back and forth, like he was trying to uncork a wine bottle. In less time than I would have believed possible, Eric had managed to tear Victor's head from his shoulders, and I couldn't prevent a choked sob from escaping my lips as I watched Victor's now lifeless and broken body fall to the floor in a heap.

Eric didn't raise the severed head up as a trophy, he didn't smile, and he didn't show any of his usual flair at all. He just let the head fall from his hands and land at his feet, then he turned to Felipe' and bowed from the neck. The King returned the gesture slowly, formally. I noticed that no one was moving at all, there was complete silence except the unsettling sounds that were starting to come from Victor's body as it began to slowly disintegrate.

Eric didn't look at me at all. He seemed to get some sort of unspoken permission from the King, and he walked slowly toward the entrance through which we had come. A pair of guards drifted after him silently, and they all three disappeared through the door.

I didn't think I could speak if I had wanted to.

Quinn moved to the middle of the room, taking a circuitous route so as to not step in the pools of blood.

"The Challenge is finished," he announced. "Let the record reflect that Eric Northman, Sheriff of Area Five, emerged victorious, and Victor Madden, Sheriff of Area One, was sent to final death."

And that, as they say, was that.

Bill and I stood together by the wall for a good while. I knew there was movement around me, the sounds of chairs being moved and soft conversation, but I was in another world. I could still sense Eric's presence, he hadn't gone so far that he was out of range for me to pick up on him through our bond. His blood lust had subsided, but something just as powerful was coursing through him now. He wasn't happy, not exactly, but he was content and awash with satisfaction. And he was needing me. I could feel his call, the gentle pull I had been slowly learning to recognize. It was everything I could do to keep from sprinting out of the room to find him.

"Miss Stackhouse," an accented voice said, and I looked into Felipe's dark eyes. "You are free to return with Eric to Louisiana, you know."

I nodded. "Yes. Thank you, sir."

"I just spoke with Russell. He has offered to fly your party back to his home state. Shall I take you to Eric?" he asked, and I couldn't help but smile at him. I began to believe that I was finally going to get out of this place alive.

Without waiting for my answer, the King led me, Bill and Yasuka out of the large room that I hoped never, ever to see again in my life. I trailed behind the vampires, and as we walked Felipe' spoke a little with Bill about the rebuilding of Louisiana and the recently vacated Sheriff position in New Orleans.

"We might have to do some restructuring," the King said. "The income loss has been substantial. Have you thought about expanding your computer business?"

And even though I wasn't a vampire, the implications in that question were pretty clear.

"I have," Bill answered. "I have a few ideas, but I'd like to speak to Eric before I make any decisions."

Felipe' chuckled. "It's good to stay within the chain, Compton. It shows loyalty. Talk to your Sheriff about your ideas. I'll be very interested to hear what he has to say."

We had come to a door then, and the two guards that had followed Eric were positioned right outside.

"The parking area where you came in is right that way," Felipe' said, and he pointed down a long hall. "I have cars waiting to take you to the airport. You'll have to hurry if you want to make it back before sunrise."

"Thank you," Bill said, then he looked at me. "We'll meet you."

Bill and Yasuka took off down the hall, and the guards unlocked the door for us. Eric was just inside, leaning against a table that was scattered with empty True Blood bottles. He was clean, his hair was wet, and he was wearing what looked like draw string pajama bottoms and nothing else. He still wasn't looking at me.

"Eric," the King said, "You appear no worse for wear. I'm sure you remember the way out?"

"I do," Eric replied simply.

"Excellent. Russell will be leaving shortly, and he has offered to take you as far as Mississippi."

"That's very generous of him," Eric said.

The King moved to the door then, but paused before exiting.

"I'll give you a call tomorrow night. We have a great deal to discuss. And perhaps I'll pay you a visit once Fangtasia is up and running again."

"I would be honored to have you," Eric replied, and he sounded absolutely sincere.

"I'm sure you would," the King said, and his eyes sparked. "Do you know what I find curious?"

Eric didn't answer, but the King continued anyway, eyeing Eric with interest.

"Victor went through a great deal of trouble to get you out of the way. It seems like a such a risk, doesn't it? All of this just to get his hands on a young woman that _cannot_ read vampire minds?"

The King opened the door, and just before he left he nodded his head at me and smiled brilliantly.

"Please give my regards to your extraordinary family, Miss. Stackhouse. I'll keep in touch."

Then the king left, closing the door slowly behind him. I knew my eyes had gone big, and I wondered exactly what part of my family the King was referring, but I pushed that question aside for another time.

I turned to face Eric, and he finally met my eyes. I found I couldn't stand not to touch him. I felt drawn to him, and I crossed the room and all but fell into his chest. His arms encircled me instantly, and I felt his lips touch my head. I pressed my cheek to his shoulder and held him as tight as I could.

"Did he hurt you at all?"I asked quietly.

"I've already healed."

I pushed back and looked up into his face. For a moment I got a flash of him as he was during the fight; blood covered and vicious, primal. I shuddered in spite of myself.

"I've frightened you," he said, and he took one hand and held my chin.

"A little," I said, and he cocked an eyebrow.

"A lot," I amended, and he smiled gently.

He bent and kissed me slowly, passionately. I had a hundred things I wanted to ask him; I wanted to know about that knife, and the spell and what and how it all worked. But right then, all I could do was just kiss him back. The night's emotional events were catching up on me, and I felt like I was falling down from some great height, and only Eric's strong arms were preventing me from crashing.

"We could have been killed tonight," I whispered in between kisses.

"No," he said and his mouth moved to my neck.

"I was so...." I started, but Eric cut me off with another kiss.

"Shhhh, it's over now," he whispered into my mouth, then he pulled me into his arms again and I sagged against him, my emotional reserves suddenly and completely shot. I wondered if I would even be able to walk.

"Will you do something for me?" I asked softy, and Eric pulled away and looked into my face. I took that as a yes.

"Take me home," I said, and without a word, my vampire scooped me up, cradled me in his arms and carried me out the door and down the hall.

_- To be continued_


	29. Chapter 29

**Know Thyself**

**Chapter Twenty Nine**

Normally, I prefer to walk on my own two feet, under my own power, but this was as far from a normal night as I'd had in a good while.

I was in such a state of exhaustion and shock and relief, I wasn't even concerned that Eric was carrying me like a child all the way to the black vehicles that were to deliver us back to Russell's private plane. I barely recalled the car ride, too. I just cuddled up close to Eric and let my head rest on his shoulder. His arm was around me, but I hardly felt it. It was as if my whole body had just shut down, and I was almost numb. I wondered if it was some self-preservation response.

This time, Bill and Yasuka were permitted to ride in the same vehicle, and they were sitting across from us silently. No one spoke at all, but the silence wasn't uncomfortable. I wondered if the others were just as emotionally and mentally drained as I. This had been one hell of a night, and vampire or not, it had to have taken a toll on some level.

A few times during the ride, my eyes met Bill's, and we just held each other's gaze for a while until a bump in the road, or a sudden shift gave us an excuse to break away. I knew I would never, ever look at Bill the same way again after the events we had shared these past many days.

I had recently forgiven him for the things in our past that had gone terribly awry, but now I knew I had moved far beyond simple forgiveness. Bill had risked himself for me, and for Eric, and he had done so at great peril to himself. Whatever sins he had committed in regards to me were no more, as far as I was concerned. They were history, ancient history, and I knew they would never again cause me another moment's anger or grief. Bill might no longer be my lover, but I knew I had my friend back now.

And really, my friend had always been there, waiting patiently for me to come to a point where I could see him clearly and accept him. I was sure I had come to that point now.

I _wasn't_ sure however that I would be able to adequately put those thoughts into words, but I hoped when Bill looked into my eyes he understood. He smiled gently at me once, and I like to think he did understand. I summoned up just enough energy to smile back a little, and at the same instant I felt Eric squeeze my shoulder.

"I need to call Pam," Eric asked after a bit, and he looked at Bill. "Do you have your cell phone on you?"

Bill nodded and handed it over. Eric spent a few minutes quietly briefing his child on our current situation and giving her a probable time frame on our return.

We drove the final few miles and before long we had arrived at the airstrip. We piled out of the car, and the vampires said brief farewells with one another before we loaded into the plane, which was already prepared for takeoff.

Eric and I took up position in the seats we had used before, as did Bill and Yasuka. I heard voices, both spoken and in thoughts, and I was surprised to see Baako Edusai and the other two witches come through the door and down the aisle toward the back of the plane. The African witch nodded at Eric as he passed, Eric returned the gesture, then he and his two colleagues continued to the far back of the plane, taking the seats in the very last row. I grinned at what I assumed was a safety strategy; from that position, they could keep and eye on the vampires. I couldn't say I blamed them for their caution.

"I have some work for them," Russell said, his voice coming from behind me, startling me. I peered up at him, and he nodded toward the witches. "Since they were already in the country, they were agreeable to re-arranging their schedules to accommodate me."

I didn't ask what work Russell had for them, but it did remind me that I had a truckload of questions for Eric at some point in the near future. The _very_ near future.

Russell then slapped my vampire on the shoulder like they were old buddies, and tossed Eric a shirt before settling into a seat right across the aisle from us. Eric thanked him and pulled the shirt, a light colored tee that was a size or two too small, over his head.

"I was pleased with the outcome of the trial, Northman," the vampire King of Mississippi said in his thick southern drawl. "I haven't witnessed a challenge in, oh, I don't know how many centuries. It was a fine display." Russell paused, looking thoughtful. "I do sometimes miss the old ways."

Eric smiled sightly. "I'm glad you enjoyed yourself."

"It's a shame about Victor," Russell continued; shaking his head. "He certainly earned his fate, but from what I've been told he was a fine Sheriff, a real earner for Felipe'."

"That he was," Eric said simply, and there was something in his voice I couldn't place. I looked up at him, but he was staring straight ahead.

"You won't make it back to Shreveport before daybreak," Russell stated, and he cast his gaze back at Bill, including him in the statement. "You're free to rest at my mansion again, if you like."

"Thank you," Bill stated.

"As always, you're very generous," Eric said.

Russell laughed. "Well, we can call it that," he said and he stood up. "I'll just let the pilot we're ready to go."

Once the King left, Eric put his arm around me and pulled me in close to him. I rested against him heavily and closed my eyes, breathing in his scent and enjoying the feelings of warmth and safety he roused inside me. I tensed involuntarily as the plane engines began to rev up, getting louder and louder. Then we were moving, then flying, then sleep borne of utter exhaustion took me away.

I drifted in and out of the broken and light napping that comes with travel; it was as though I was in semi-dream state. I heard Eric and Bill talking, discussing the logistics of our return to Louisiana, and the situation with Yasuka. That last part piqued my interest, and I tried to listen, but after a few minutes I decided it simply wasn't worth the effort and I let myself fall back into slumber.

"Sookie," I heard Eric saying some time later, and I felt myself being shaken lightly. "Sookie, we're here."

"Hmmmm?" I mumbled, and even though a part of my brain was registering the need to open my eyes, I was simply unable to do so.

"Is she ill?" another voice asked. That was Russell.

"No," Bill answered; he sounded far away. "She's just had too much to deal with. It's been a hard week."

"It's catching up with her," Eric said; I thought he maybe sounded a little sad.

"Let's get her to my place as soon as we can, then," Russell said.

I felt cool, strong arms take hold of me behind my back and under my legs; lifting me like a doll.

Eric carried me out of the plane and we loaded us into a waiting car. My eyes fluttered open a few times, but I was really in a kind of daze. What was wrong with me, I wondered? My body was simply not responding, I couldn't form a coherent thought, and I felt like even the energy I expended to breathe was too much. I wondered briefly if this was like a crash after an extensive adrenaline rush, but before I could think about it further, I was gone again.

I woke again when we arrived at Russell's mansion; this time Eric didn't even bother trying to rouse me, or if he did, I hadn't realized it. He carried me up the stairs and lay me on the big four poster bed in the same room we had shared before.

I had enough of my senses left to kick off my shoes and I heard them thump as they hit the floor. Eric helped me with the rest of my clothes, and then got me tucked in under the silk sheets and and the big fluffy blanket. The pillow felt amazingly good under my head and I sighed heavily. I slid one hand out from under the covers and reached toward Eric.

"I can't stay," he said, but he placed his hand in mine and I felt the bed shift as he sat down beside me. "It's nearly dawn. I have to take shelter."

I whimpered a little protest, but knew it was pointless. I felt Eric's hand stroke my hair back from my face, and he leaned down and kissed my lips. I opened my eyes - it took an extreme amount of effort to do so - and I saw my beautiful vampire's face glowing above me.

"Are we really safe now?" I murmured, and Eric's face went soft.

"Yes. You're safe with me," he answered, and he kissed me once more. My eyes closed again, and I heard him chuckle.

"I'm not sure which one of us will sleep sounder this day," Eric said, and I could hear the smile in his voice. I had no energy to respond, but I felt Eric lean down, felt his lips at my ear.

"Will you say the words for me again?" He asked gently, and despite my nearly comatose state, I knew exactly what he meant. "I want to hear you say it. I want to go to my rest hearing the words in my mind."

I had promised myself I wouldn't say it again, not until he did, but I was past the point of pettiness at the moment. I struggled to open my eyes a tiny amount, and with all the strength I could muster I reached my left hand up and touched Eric's lips.

"I love you," I whispered, and I felt him kiss my fingertips, one by one, and my eyes closed once more.

"Thank you, my lover," he said softly; and then I couldn't fight sleep anymore. My head sunk further into the pillow, my body relaxed and the last thing I remembered was hearing Eric speak to me in a beautiful language that soothed me as surely as a lullaby.

When I finally woke, it was gradual. And painful. My body was stiff and sore, and I knew I probably hadn't moved at all in hours. I stretched a bit, arching my back and flexing my legs and arms. I rolled onto my stomach with a moan, and flipped the pillow over to the cold side and hugged it to my face while I waited for my brain to catch up with the fact that I was awake.

As I lay there, I let myself consider all the events of the night before. The trip back from Nevada was still just a big, tangled blur to me, but I recalled every single second of the trial in vivid detail. And now that I had a chance to sleep on things, literally, and now that I wasn't in fear for my life, I was more anxious than ever to get some answers about this so-called Covenant.

I shook my head and pushed myself up to a sitting position. The blinds were closed down, but a diffuse glow of pale sunlight was drifting in through the window. I noticed with some amusement that the alarm clock, the one Eric had broken quite thoroughly, had already been replaced, and I gasped when I realized it was very, very late in the afternoon. I had been hanging out with vampires too long, it looked like. I had very nearly slept the day away!

I crawled out of bed, stretching a little more, and saw that a pile of clean clothes had been placed neatly at the foot of the bed; along with a towel, robe and the personal items I had brought from home. I pulled on the robe, gathered everything else in my arms and headed for the door, wondering if the daytime guard, Liddy, would be waiting for me again. A quick scan of the minds in the area confirmed that she was, and I favored her with my brightest smile when I opened the door.

"Good morning!" I said cheerfully, and Liddy just scowled. She was annoyed to no end that she had to escort me around once more, but she was reminding herself the pay was good.

"It's afternoon," she said, and started walking down the hall toward the bathroom while I followed. She leaned heavily against the wall and placed her arms across her chest.

"When you're done, we have lunch prepared for you," she said; then she made a grand gesture of looking at her watch. "Though since it's closer to dinner, you might have to heat it up."

I smiled again, doing my best to try to break through this woman's tough shell. Wasn't happening.

"Thanks so much! I'm sure it will be great. I won't be long."

Liddy just raised an eyebrow and went back to the business of being annoyed, while I stepped into the bathroom and turned on the water in the shower.

I washed my hair and scrubbed myself down from head to toe and when I was about halfway through I realized I was absolutely starving. I brushed my teeth hurriedly, dried and brushed out my hair, and was dressed faster than I had managed in a good while. I felt clean and comfortable in jeans and a light blue, form fitting sweater. I did an experimental smile in the mirror before gathering up my things and heading back out to face Liddy, who was making a mental list of all the things she needed to pick up at Walmart later.

I dropped the robe and my bag in the bedroom before following Liddy downstairs toward the kitchen area. Once there, she pointed at the refrigerator, and inside I found a big plate of food - some kind of meat with abundant sides of vegetables - covered with plastic wrap. I assumed that was mine, and I took it out and popped it into the microwave while Liddy watched me from across the room.

Just as I was sitting down to eat, Lucas bounded into the room and I smiled at him hugely, pleased to see a familiar - and friendly - face. He went to the refrigerator, grabbed out a can of Coke, popped it open and took up a seat at the table with me.

"So I guess the information I sent to Bill worked, huh?" he said without preamble. I nodded my head and took a swig of my own drink.

"Yep, it sure did," I affirmed. "As it turned out, the guy in charge of that website was the same vampire that was trying to get Eric and I killed."

Lucas' eyes went wide and he leaned back in the chair.

"Whoa, no way! Really? Man....." he trailed off, shaking his head, and looking more than a little shocked and even afraid.

I took a few more bites - the green beans were really good - and waited for the information to sink in, waited for Lucas to come to terms with the enormity of the conspiracy he had helped to uncover. He didn't say anything for a while, but I could hear his thoughts, and he was pretty pleased with himself for being a part of something that was so important. He hadn't been given many opportunities in his life to make a difference, or to find develop skills in any certain area. This was huge for him, and I smiled to myself before politely retreating from his head.

A loud chime sounded then and I took a peek at the clock; it was clearly the one hour till sundown warning. I heard the sounds of shuffling feet as the activity throughout the mansion in preparation for the vampire King's rise.

"You want to take a walk with me? Have a look at the rest of the place?" Lucas asked as I finished off the last of my dinner and headed to the sink to rinse off the plate.

I shrugged. "That would be great," I said, and I meant it. Russell's compound was enormous, with a resplendent period charm that I loved. I had never really gotten a chance to look at it as the times I'd been here had been in the middle of crises. I stole a quick glance at Liddy, wondering if I'd be allowed to roam freely with Lucas. The teenager followed my gaze and waved a hand.

"Don't worry about her, she's cool," he told me; I assumed he knew more about the disinterested guard than I did.

We headed out of the kitchen, and Liddy fell in behind us, but I noticed she stayed at a polite distance. We started moving from room to room, with Lucas pointing out interesting little things about a certain painting or knick-knack.

It was amazing the things Russell had collected over his long life; I found myself being drawn into the feel of the antebellum charm that was the hallmark of the mansion. I remembered once thinking that Scarlett O'Hara might very well be seen coming down the stairs in a place such as this, and the more I saw of the home and the grounds, the more I thought my initial reaction had been correct. It was exquisite, and I felt a brief, sad pang when I thought how much my Gran would have loved it.

We spent the better part of an hour chatting and walking; I found I really enjoyed Lucas' company. He was a genuinely nice kid, nice _person_, I corrected myself. We were taking a circuitous route back to the main entrance, and as we passed by a room with a door that was half-closed, I heard the sounds of singing, and I paused and cocked my head to the side with interest. A listened harder and realized it wasn't really singing I was hearing, more like chanting, like something one would hear in a religious service. My curiosity got the better of me and I took a few steps toward the door and peeked inside.

"Oh, the witches are doing their thing," Lucas explained, coming up beside me.

"And what _thing_ is that?" I asked softly.

Baako Edusai and his companions were standing together in a sort of triangle configuration with their hands held in front of them and their eyes closed. I felt like I was spying; okay, I _was _spying, but after what I saw with Hallow I had become, if not suspicious, exactly, of witches, certainly intrigued by them.

Lucas shrugged. "I have no idea," he admitted. "They put warding spells on rooms and stuff like that for safety. We get them here from time to time, more now that Russell is married to Indiana."

"Why is that?" I asked, turning away from the ceremony, or whatever it was.

Lucas's brow furrowed. "I'm not sure, really. I mean, I know Bartlett is really big on security, like I explained before, so maybe he's rubbed off on Russell." Lucas paused, and his face turned red and it took me a moment before I considered what he said, then I couldn't help but grin, too.

"But," Lucas continued, "It's also like Russell takes his own life, his own safety, more seriously now that he's married. Like he has something to live for, I guess." He shrugged. "I know it sounds stupid, since they're vamps and all."

"No," I said softly, and my gaze returned to the witches. "I don't think that sounds stupid at all."

Another chime sounded, marking the fifteen minute warning, and Lucas sucked in a sharp breath.

"Ah heck," he said, looking at his watch. "I was supposed to go to the front gate and pick up some package that was delivered earlier."

My eyes went wide, and I was a little taken aback by his sudden panic.I wondered if Russell was really _that_ strict with his people. He didn't strike me as the type, but then again, I didn't work for him.

"Go on," I said, and Lucas backed away, looking apologetic.

"You know the way back, right?"

I smiled. "Don't worry about me. Get going!"

Lucas turned and literally sprinted down the hall; I felt a warm presence come up behind me and I turned around.

Baako Edusai was standing there, robes and all, and looking at me with interest. He was tall, and now that I could really get a good look at him, I saw he was maybe in his fifties, with greying hair that suited him well. His complexion was deep and luminous, like melted chocolate. He had kind eyes, I noticed, and I smiled up at him.

"Hello, Mr. Edusai," I said politely; I was so accustomed to meeting vampires I almost forgot to hold out my hand. "It's a pleasure to meet you. Formally, I mean."

The witch took my hand, not in a handshake, but rather in an old-fashioned gesture of familiarity, and bowed a little at the neck.

"Indeed it is, Ms. Stackhouse. You are the roommate of the young witch, Amelia Broadway, are you not?"

It took me a moment to formulate a response. The witch was looking at me intently, and though it didn't make me uncomfortable, not exactly, it was definitely different; I found I couldn't look away. There was power behind his gaze and I didn't even consider trying to get into his head.

"Yes, sir," I said finally, and I was sure I had my crazy Sookie grin on my face. "She speaks very highly of you."

Baako laughed; a rich and pleasant laugh that put me at ease.

"I'm glad to hear it. I've only met her once, briefly, in New Orleans, but I was impressed by her attention to detail and organization. She has great potential. Perhaps I will call on her the next time I in the area." He winked at me then, and grinned. "You will let her know I said that, will you not?"

"Absolutely!" I said, and I could barely contain the rush of excitement I felt just then. Amelia would be thrilled beyond words when I told her what her witchy idol had said.

The other witches exited the room, and Baako turned and spoke to them briefly; they were making plans to head out to dinner, which struck me as a little strange for some reason, though I knew it shouldn't. Witches had to eat, too, right? I just had a hard time picturing this group ordering at Cracker Barrel.

I watched as Baako and his crew started to head down the hall; I knew this might be my best, if not only, chance to ask him what I wanted to know about the knife and the spell. I clenched my fists over and over, not sure exactly how to broach the subject, and not even sure I wanted to. Eric and I had become close, and I thought I was starting to understand him and his motives, but this thing with the Covenant was really scary, mainly because I didn't have the first clue what it meant. I wanted to know, but I _didn't_ want to know.

But as I watched Baako turn the corner and go out of sight, I decided I _needed_ to know.

"Mr. Edusai!" I called, and a jogged a little bit down the hall, trying to catch him. He poked his head back around the corner as I approached, and I bit my lower lip.

"I'm really sorry to bother you, Sir," I said quickly, and then I looked at his companions. "And I know y'all are trying to get out of here to go to dinner, but if I could just have a couple minutes of your time..."

"You want to ask me about the spellbinding on the Covenant blade?" Baako asked with raised eyebrows.

I tried not to let the surprise show on my face, but I wasn't sure I succeeded.

"Well, actually, yes I did, Sir," I stammered, feeling off-balance. I got the impression this witch knew a lot more than he let on,

Baako turned to his group and told them he'd meet them at the door shortly, and once they had departed he smiled at me and held his hands out in front of him.

"What do you wish to know?"

My first instinct was to say _'everything!' _But now that I was here with Baako, I found I really wasn't sure what to ask. I was acutely aware of where we were, in the home of a vampire King, and I wasn't sure how deep this deception that Eric had concocted went. If it even _was_ a deception. I tried to formulate an inquiry in such a way that it really didn't sound like I had no idea what I had done. Or _hadn't _done.

"I was just curious about how that spell worked," I began slowly, choosing my words with care.

"Your vampire partner didn't explain it to you before the ceremony?" Baako asked, and I noticed he sounded less than surprised.

"Not really, no," I said, and hoped to heavens I was wearing my poker face. "All that was explained to me was what I heard at the trial."

I considered my words. That wasn't a lie, was it? No, definitely not a lie. Spin on the truth? A resounding _yes_.

Baako nodded, placed a hand lightly on my back and we began walking very slowly back down the hallway.

"When I was weaving the spell, I did so under the assumption that the blade would be used for vampire ceremonies only. That is to say that the individuals that would be under the effects of the spell would be immortal. I regret that."

"Why?" I asked, feeling a terrible sense of foreboding running up my spine.

"The spell's attributes will last for one hundred years. That is but a drop of time for most of their kind, but for you, it was a decision that will last for the rest of your natural life." He looked at me with narrowed eyes. "I pray that you took care in considering this fact before you agreed to the Covenant."

Well, I thought to myself, I'm sure I _would have _considered it carefully, had I known about it. I tried to keep my face neutral, but inside I was waffling between rage and fear.

"Okay, so will the spell actually work differently because I'm human?"

Baako stopped walking and seemed to frown.

"No. Once the blade came into contact with your blood, the spell was activated and it will work the same as it will for your vampire. He will be an extension of you, like your hand. You can not deny him, or harm him, without denying or harming yourself."

"When it touched my blood?" I repeated softly, and I hadn't realized I had even said the words aloud.

"Yes," Baako answered, and there was suspicion in his voice and I cringed at my error. "The vampire Priest used the blade on you to spill your blood, did he not?"

"Oh, it's not that," I said, side-stepping the question so I didn't have to out and out lie. "I just didn't realize that was the moment the spell started to work. It's really, uh, fascinating."

And I hoped I sounded fascinated. I watched Baako's face closely, and if he didn't believe me he wasn't letting on.

He smiled at me again, and then lifted up the large sleeve in his robes to reveal what even I recognized as a very expensive watch.

"I must be going, but I hope my answers have enlightened you somewhat."

"Oh yes, " I said quickly. "Very much so! Can I ask you just one more thing?"

He nodded and I steadied myself.

"Just out of curiosity, is it possible for the spell to only work one way?"

Baako cocked his head to side in confusion. "You mean, if only one individual uses the blade to seal a Covenant with another?"

"Right," I answered slowly. "Like, if a vampire cuts himself, but then the other person doesn't?"

Baako's eyebrows shot up, and he stared at me intently for a moment, then he began to laugh, a hearty laugh that came from his belly. He placed his hand on my shoulder.

"The spell would still work on the one that was cut," he said, smiling hugely. "But I don't think we ever have to concern ourselves with that."

"Why?" I asked, trying to match his smile for the sake of appearance.

"Well, that would mean a vampire had chosen to bind his fate and assets to another that was not under the same obligation. And truly, my dear, what sort of vampire would do such a thing?"

Just then I felt a familiar warmth wash over me; I looked past Baako to see Eric standing at the very end of the hallway, watching me.

"What sort of vampire, indeed," I whispered.

"I must take my leave now," Baako said and we said polite farewells before he turned and strode away, nodding at Eric as he passed him.

Eric didn't make a move toward me, and I didn't budge, either. I was going over all the things Baako had said, and though I was relieved to find that I had not been placed under a spell from the knife, I was having trouble wrapping my head around the fact that Eric certainly _was_.

I walked slowly, very slowly, to my vampire, and I was looking at him with new eyes, now. So many little remarks, small things he had said and done, now made sense. But there was a question of enormous proportions hanging in the air.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked him quietly when I was right in front of him.

He looked at me with those brilliant blue eyes and I searched his face, trying to find an answer. He reached out to touch my cheek with his hand and I backed away, out of his reach.

"Don't try that," I warned him, and a half smile tugged at his mouth. That did nothing but add fuel to the already smoking embers in my mind.

"I mean it, Eric," I hissed, trying to be quiet. "I can't believe you did this to us!"

Eric just smiled broader. "I didn't do anything to _us_, lover. Just to myself."

"Yeah! I figured that out! _One hundred years?_ Are you nuts? Are you completely insane?"

"Possibly," he answered, and this time when he reached for me he didn't give me the chance to get away. He pulled me to him, and I put on a show of a struggle, but it was like trying to fight a mountain. He soon had me locked in his arms with his mouth on mine, and despite my annoyance, I found myself returning the kiss.

We broke apart after a bit, and I peered up at him, still wanting answers, but understanding that this was probably not the time and place to get them.

"You slept well?" he asked, changing the subject. I wanted to whack him.

"Yes," I answered through clenched teeth.

"You had something to eat?" he asked, stepping in very close to me.

"Yes."

"I haven't," he said thickly, and he placed his hands on either side of my neck. When he smiled at me I saw his fangs had run out. My own body betrayed me and despite my irritation, I felt a throb down below.

"Eric," I whispered; and the next thing I knew I was up against the wall and Eric had gently pulled back my soft sweater and was nuzzling the bend between my neck and shoulder. I had my arms around his waist, and he was running his hands along my back. When he bit, I couldn't stifle a little gasp of pleasure and pain. He drew on the wounds deeply and I felt my body - and his - start to respond. I wished we could_ poof _ourselves upstairs to the bedroom. That would be a convenient Fae skill to perfect, I thought absently.

After too short of a time, I felt Eric lick the puncture marks and he put my sweater back in place.

When I looked at his face again, it was rosy, and full, and lusty.

"You have no idea how hard it is to stop sometimes," he whispered; and he kissed me quite thoroughly.

I realized Eric had been very efficient at deflecting the conversation. My shock at this was boundless. Not!

"Hey!" a cheerful voice said; Eric and I turned to see Lucas rounding the corner to the hall before stopping dead in his tracks when he saw the situation.

"Whoa," he said, and he turned away, red-faced. "My bad. I'll just wait to give you...."

"It's okay, Lucas," I stated with a laugh, and I disentangled myself from Eric, who looked pretty far from being okay with the interruption. "What's up?"

"The delivery was for Sheriff Northman," Lucas stated, and he held out a small, brown wrapped package.

Eric took it quickly and began to unwrap it. I looked expectantly at Eric, but he showed no signs of speaking.

"He's thanking you silently," I said to Lucas, and I glared up at Eric who appeared to be ignoring the jab completely.

"Thank you, Lucas," Eric said, never looking up, and I guessed that was as good as we were going to get from the Viking.

Eric grunted with satisfaction when he opened the package and pulled out a new cell phone, exactly like the one he had lost in the explosion at Fangtasia. Pam was on the job, it seemed.

"There is another, uh, delivery for you outside," Lucas said and his expression was one of near awe. I smiled when I read from the teenagers mind what the other delivery was.

"I'll be right there," Eric said, and Lucas took that as his cue to leave.

Eric turned on the cell phone and stuck it in his pocket just as Bill appeared in the hallway. I knew things were about to kick into gear with us departing, so I turned to Eric and poked a finger on his chest.

"We're _so_ not done with our conversation, buddy," I told him.

He smiled at me. "Of course not, dear heart," he said and I couldn't decide if I should be offended at his amused tone.

"Are you about ready to go?" Bill asked, coming toward us.

"I believe so," Eric said, then he glanced behind Bill. 'Where is the young one?"

"Having a snack before we get on the road."

Oh, _lovely!_ I shook my head, but Bill didn't look the least bit apologetic.

"Can I speak with you privately for a moment," Bill asked Eric, and I decided this was as good a time as any to run back upstairs and make sure everything was packed.

"I can take a hint," I said, and off I went. I wasn't quite out of earshot when I heard Bill speak again.

"I'd like to call in that favor now," he said, and I smiled to myself when I considered Eric's expression.

I very nearly stopped to listen in, but thought better of it. I'd find out eventually. Or not. After the past few weeks, all I really cared about was that this exchange of favors didn't involve _me_. Beyond that, the boys could scheme, and negotiate, and haggle until they were blue in the face.

I trudged upstairs, took a quick stop in the bathroom, then gathered up all of my things. I took a quick scan around the bedroom, double checking to make sure I hadn't forgotten anything. I was on my hands and knees peeking under the bed when I felt a felt a presence very close. I turned my head slightly and saw polished dark shoes. I gasped, my hand went to my chest in surprise, and I looked up into Russell's face. He held out his hand, and I took it, and he helped me to my feet.

"I didn't mean to startle you," the King said with a smile. "I just wanted to offer my congratulations on your Covenant with Eric."

"Oh," I said, and I turned on my crazy grin. This was not a conversation I wanted to have right now. Or ever, honestly. It was bad enough that I had to admit to this Covenant thing in Nevada, even if it did prevent Felipe' from keeping me, but to have to keep repeating the lie over and over, well, that was really not the way I wanted to live my life.

"I know it's belated," Russell continued, eyeing with curiously. "But since Eric never informed anyone, that couldn't be helped. Had I known, I would have sent a small token."

"Oh, it's no problem," I said, and I kept on smiling like mad. "You know Eric, he likes to keep things to himself."

The King looked me up and down once, and his eyes narrowed. "Yes, he does indeed."

Okay, that wasn't exactly what I meant, but I guess I fit into that category.

"I can't say I blame him," Russell stated, and I noticed his fangs had run out a little and his eyes had glazed over. "Part Fae...." he trailed off, shaking his head and looking hungry. "That does explain a few things."

I began to feel uneasy, and at that very moment Russell composed himself, his fangs retracted and he became the Southern Gentleman once more.

"I didn't mean to frighten you," he said.

"You didn't," I said, and I waved a hand dismissively.

"Remember, I've had your blood, my dear."

"When did you.....?" and then I stopped. Of course. At his bar, Josephine's, when the Were biker had scratched up my shoulder. It was only a lick or two, but then I recalled what Eric had told me about Russell and his talent for reading humans from whom he had fed. I felt embarrassment start to rise up, and some fear. What had I involuntarily given away?

The King leaned in very close to me. "Your secrets are safe with me," he whispered. "You will pass that along to Eric, won't you?"

Then he winked at me and turned on his heel; and I was left standing there in the room with my mouth hanging open. I sat down on the bed and just stared into space for many minutes. Jesus Christ Shepherd of Judea, how many more surprises did I have waiting for me? I needed to get home, I decided, before anything else happened. I grabbed my bag and all but ran down the stairs. Bill was waiting by the front door with Yasuka.

"Where's Eric?" I asked.

"Speaking to Russell," Bill said.

"About what?"

Bill smiled, but remained silent.

"Well, is he going to be a while?" I pressed. I was more ready than ever to get on the road.

"No," Eric's voice answered, and I turned to see my vampire striding into the room with an almost giddy looking King right behind him. My Viking exchanged a charged look with Bill.

"He's yours," Eric said, never breaking his long stride, and Bill nodded formally as his Sheriff passed him.

"Let's go," Eric said to me, and he all but dragged me out the door. I barely had time to stammer a quick goodbye to Russell.

"That was rude," I admonished him as soon as we were outside. "What was all that about?"

"Bill's favor," Eric said briefly.

"What kind of favor?"

"The kind that is costing me a small fortune," Eric growled.

I mouthed the word _okay, _and decided to drop it.

Waiting just at the bottom of the steps was a brand new, red Corvette, and Eric opened the passenger door for me.

"I can't believe you bought a new car," I said. I already knew it was here, thanks to Lucas being a strong sender.

"I didn't," Eric said; he shut my door and went around to get into the driver's seat. "I was fully insured. I'm only out the deductible," he continued as he started up the engine, and something about the statement made my giggle.

"You got a new one really fast," I said, just to make conversation.

"Pam pushed the claim through quickly," Eric said with a tiny smile.

I could only _begin_ to imagine the methods Pam had used to acquire and deliver this vehicle so fast.

"I really am sorry about wrecking your car," I said softly. "I'll pay you back."

"Oh yes, you certainly will," Eric said and though his voice was dead serious, he flashed me a very Ericy grin and his eyes danced.

"Wait!" I said as we pulled away, and Eric looked at me. "How is Bill getting home?"

Eric pointed to a shiny, blue Mazda Protege sitting not far away.

"It's nice," I said. I assumed Eric had arranged for a rental, but why we all couldn't just drive back together was a mystery. I let it go. I was more than happy to spend some time alone with Eric; time we could talk without interruption.

We drove in silence for a bit, and I wondered if both of us were waiting for the other to start the inevitable conversation we needed to have. I glanced at my vampire. The night was very dark, but the lights from the interstate strobed by, casting shadows on Eric's softly glowing face. He glanced at me.

"I'm supposed to tell you something," I began slowly, "But you won't like it."

I saw Eric's brow furrow, and I took a deep breath.

"Russell bids me to tell you that, and I quote, my secrets are safe with him."

Eric swiveled his head in my direction, and his expression was openly confused. "What are you talking about? What secrets? What did you tell him?"

"I have no idea," I stated softly.

"Excuse me?" Eric asked.

"He's had my blood," I said, keeping my eyes on Eric's face. "I'm not really sure what he knows about me."

Eric's expression turned to one of fury in an instant. He jerked hard on the steering wheel and the tires screeched in protest as Eric slammed on the brakes and the car came to a sudden, jolting stop on the shoulder of the road. I lurched forward, and only my seat belt prevented me from cracking my head into the dash. I stared at my vampire, shocked and infuriated by his reaction.

"Are you trying to kill me?" I screeched.

"When did Russell feed from you?" Eric demanded, and he twisted in the seat to look at me. "Tonight?"

"Oh my God," I spat, not believing what I was hearing. "Of _course_ not tonight. And he didn't _feed_ on me."

"Tell me," he demanded, and I proceeded to explain about the events in the club with the Were bikers. As I recounted the story, I saw Eric's countenance change and soften. He had over-reacted and he knew it. Good.

"I hope you feel like a jerk," I said; and I crossed my arms over my chest in a huff and shifted in the little seat so I was facing straight ahead.

"I feel like a jerk," Eric said. After a moment the silence got to me so I looked over at him.

"You know what," I said, deciding to ride the wave of residual righteous anger I was feeling. "You really have some gall, acting this way after that bull you pulled in Nevada."

Eric turned back around and gripped the steering wheel with both hands. "If I hadn't done what I did, you would still be in Las Vegas."

"I realize that," I snapped. "That doesn't change the fact that I had to stand up in court and tell everyone I was....that we are....what the hell are we supposed to be to one another, anyway?"

Eric remained silent.

"What? Are we supposed to be married?" I pressed, and Eric's eyes found mine. I saw the answer in them.

"Sweet Jesus," I breathed. "How could you do this to me without telling me? No, scratch that. How could you do this without _asking_ me?"

"I did nothing to you," Eric said. "The spell is bound to my blood, not yours. You are free to do as you will."

"But everyone thinks we're married now!" I said.

"You love me," Eric said and I turned away and looked out the window into the darkness. A semi passed us, making the little car shudder.

"You gave yourself to me," Eric said and I shook my head. Was that really going to be his answer for this? Now that I was his, did he think he had the right to control my life this way? I thought we had moved past this, but now I was wondering if maybe we hadn't.

Exasperated, I grabbed the handle and flung open the car door.

"Sookie..." Eric called, but I ignored him, slid out of the car and slammed the door behind me.

The night had a chill, but I didn't care. I just needed some air. I needed to clear my head. I leaned against the side of the car and put my face in my hands. I heard the driver's door open and close, and then I felt it when Eric came to stand in front of me.

"Sookie," Eric said softly, and I felt him trying to pull at me through our bond. I shut him down.

"Sookie, look at me," he demanded.

"No," I said, steadfastly refusing to budge. It was a childish thing, yes, but I didn't care.

Eric's hands gripped mine, and he gently but firmly pried them away from my face, then he lifted my chin so I would look at him. I felt a tear stream down my cheek, and he brushed it away with his thumb. I wanted to look away, but his blue eyes held mine without remorse.

"Why?" I asked him after a moment. "Why did you use that knife on yourself in Rhodes? You knew what would happen, didn't you?"

"Yes," Eric said gently. "I knew. As for the why of it, I've asked myself that question many times over."

"And?"

"And...I still don't know, exactly. I knew only that Andre wanted you. I knew Bill and Quinn wanted you. And I knew_ I_ wanted you. I had the blade and the robe, and when I saw you with Andre in the hall, when I realized his intentions, when you looked at me, begging me to save you from submitting to his bite....it was a circumstance I couldn't let pass."

"Opportunistic bastard," I mumbled, and Eric smiled gently. He didn't disagree with me, though.

"And after that, you've been under this spell, right?" I questioned.

Eric touched my lips with his fingertip. "I think I might have been under a spell even before that night."

I knew he wasn't talking about Hallow.

"As it turns out, it was for the best," Eric said. "It was the crucial factor in the trial that allowed us to return to Louisiana together."

"But it's a lie, Eric," I said.

"That's hardly common knowledge though," he reminded me with a smile.

"Okay," I made an erase move with my hand. "Let's put that aside for now. Tell me this: why didn't you just use the knife on me, too?" I studied his face carefully as I asked the question. "You could have cut me, and then you would have gotten exactly what you wanted right then."

"No," he said, and he brushed away the loose stands of hair that was blowing in my face. "What I've always wanted was for you to yield to me on your own. I've never enjoyed your fear of me." He paused, and a slight smile touched his lips. "I'll never forget the night we went to that ridiculous orgy and you told me you trusted me. I don't think I had heard those words from anyone in over a century. I hope I haven't lost that trust."

"Answer this," I said slowly, deliberately. "What if we break up? What if I decide this is all just too much for me and I want out. What if I found someone else? What would happen?"

Eric looked pained for a split second, then the calm mask clamped down. "I would let you go," he said simply.

"Would it hurt you?"

"Yes."

"But you wouldn't make me stay, right? I wouldn't have a big, blonde stalker for the rest of my life, would I?"

"No," Eric replied. "But I hope that is a situation I will not have to endure." He paused. "Do you wish to end our relationship?"

"No," I said immediately, shaking my head. "I wish to have a relationship with someone that wants me for _me_. Not because I'm part Fae, or because of a blood bond, or because of a spell on a knife."

"Lover, I am a great many things, the majority of them not favorable," Eric said with a rueful smile. "But one thing I am _not _is sentimental. I've never allowed my emotions to control me, and make no mistake, I'm not allowing it now."

I looked into Eric's eyes, trying to understand what he was telling me.

"So you will never really love me," I said quietly. I had suspected this, of course, but it still didn't make the words any easier to hear. "You're with me because I'm valuable, right? Because I'm an interesting toy? A tasty treat?" I looked down, but my head snapped up when I heard Eric chuckle.

"My lover," he said, "I am with you because I want you. _All _of you. I told you this many nights ago, do you recall? The night I came to your house, the night Victor followed me. And I hate to be the one to break this news to you, but you _are_ in fact part Fae. A most delicious part," Eric gazed down at me and the look on his face sent a chill up my spine.

"But that's just one of your many qualities," Eric continued. "You are also bonded to me through blood; and that is another piece that makes up the whole of what you are."

He held my face in his hands. "You believe I could never really love you, but I swear to you here, now, with this night as my witness, that this is not true. I'm not led by emotion, but that doesn't mean I'm incapable of _feeling _emotion."

He bent down so his eyes were closer to mine, bright and shining and clear in the moonlight.

"I love your beauty, and your courage, and your stubbornness. I love the way you refuse to back down even when you should; and the way you charge ahead when you should not."

He paused, and looking at my Viking and hearing his words, I couldn't stop the flood of tears. He kissed them away, then continued.

"I love that you both fight me, and fight_ for_ me. I love that you argue with me, and take me to task when I get high-handed. And more than anything else, I love the fact that you understand _why _it is that I so desire all these things in you. You and I are intertwined, not just by fate or magic or blood, but by our own nature. I am in you, just as surely as you are in me."

"Eric," I started to say, but the words died in my throat. I wanted so very much to believe him, and I could nearly feel the heartfelt truth in the words. I considered the irony, that once I had been worried that my feelings were not my own, that they were somehow fabricated by our bond. Now I was concerned that Eric's feelings were not real, either, and the pain of that shot through me like a knife.

But Eric didn't seem the least bit confused or hesitant. Could a thousand year old vampire truly be so blind as to not know when he was being coerced? No, I didn't think that was the case. If Eric was secure in what he was feeling, who was I to try to convince him he didn't? But still....

"Why do you never tell me you love me?" I asked him quietly, and he stood up to his full height and moved his hands to my shoulders.

He said something then, words I now recognized but still didn't understand.

"You know, it doesn't count if I don't know what you're saying." I frowned.

"Words are just words, my lover," Eric said gently. "And some words I know are so ancient there is no translation in the modern tongues that can do them justice. This is why I speak to you the way I do, in the old language of my people. You deserve no less. But in truth," he said and he pulled me very close, "I actually prefer to let my actions speak for me."

"Is that so?" I asked, and Eric bent down and kissed me softly. He allowed me to set the pace, which I did, long and leisurely. Our mouths moved together, and he pressed my back against the car, leaning heavily against me. Whatever he was trying to say with his actions was speaking volumes.

Several cars passed by, and some teenagers honked their horn at us and hooted through the window to _get a room!_

We broke apart with a small laugh, and I shivered involuntarily as a gust of wind from a passing truck drifted into me.

"Can I talk you into getting back into the car now?" Eric asked; he held open the door for me.

I slid in, as did he, and within moments we were back on the road. We drove in content silence all the way into Louisiana. I didn't know what was going on inside my vampire's head, but mine was racing with the new information I had received. Eric's proclamation of love - or whatever it was - had affected me more than I wanted to admit.

I found myself stealing sideways glances at him as we drove, astounded that a vampire as old as Eric would dare to bind himself to me as he did, without demanding the same in return. I felt, maybe not unworthy, but certainly humbled. And I considered his other words as well; about how the whole of me was made of up of many pieces, and Eric was part of that now. He had changed me from the inside out, and he claimed I had done the same for him. I smiled into the darkness. Surprisingly, I found I rather liked that idea.

In less time than I imagined, we were suddenly bouncing along my gravel driveway and I felt a wash of happiness at seeing my home again. Eric leaned over and kissed me before un-buckling my seat belt.

"Are you going to stay for a while?" I asked, and I gave him what I hoped was a seductive look. It was still several hours before dawn; we had time for a homecoming celebration, even when you counted in his travel time back to Shreveport.

"Of course," he replied, and he grabbed my bag out of the back seat and walked with me to the porch.

As I rummaged around in my purse for my keys, I heard Eric grunt, and then I saw his nostrils flare and his fangs begin to run out. I looked around frantically, wondering what manner of creature was causing this reaction in him.

"What is it? What's wrong?" I asked, fear charging my voice, and I saw Eric whip around toward the drive.

My Great-Grandfather was standing there, cloaked in white and looking as beautiful as ever. With him was a young man, a fairy actually, and he was absolutely gorgeous; every bit as attractive as my cousin Claude, maybe even more so. He had very dark hair down to his shoulders, and dark eyebrows that contrasted with the most amazing emerald green eyes I had ever seen.

And judging from Eric's reaction, this young fairy was unable to conceal his scent the way Niall could.

"Grand-daughter," Niall said, and he held his arms out to me. I went to him and embraced him and he kissed my cheek lightly. "I'm so glad to see you well."

"It's good to see you, too," I said, and I wondered exactly how much he knew about my recent events.

"She _is_ lovely," the young Fae said, looking from me to Niall. His voice was almost a melody.

"I told you she was," my Great-Grandfather answered, sounding oddly proud.

"She has definitely shown the spark?" the handsome Fae asked.

"Oh, yes," Niall replied.

I began to wonder what this conversation meant at the same time I felt a wave of anger slam into me from the bond, rattling me where I stood. I turned to look at Eric, but Niall grabbed my attention.

"Sookie," he said, taking my hand and inclining his head toward the other fairy. "I'd like you to meet Cyril."

"Hi there," I said and I held out my hand. Cyril took it and kissed it, then smiled at me.

"He is to be your mate," Niall said.

_- To be continued_

_Hope everyone that celebrated had a wonderful holiday last weekend! Thanks again for reading; it means SO MUCH to me! And to my beta, My Meads, I heart you! xoxo_


	30. Chapter 30

**Know Thyself**

**Chapter Thirty**

It took my brain a few seconds to really process what I'd just heard. When it finally did register, I took a step backwards, pulling my arm from my great-grandfather's grasp.

"Excuse me?" I asked, because that was really the only thing I could think of to say right then. It was late, I had just barely escaped Nevada in one piece, and I wasn't exactly firing on all cylinders.

Eric, however, had no such problem. He was at my side in an instant. He stepped in between me and Niall, towering over both of us. His fangs were still out and he glared down at my Great-Grandfather with an expression that scared me in its intensity. I reached out to placed my hand on his upper arm and found it was rock solid with tension.

"Step aside, Vampire," Niall said with perfect calm. "This is not your concern."

"Sookie_ is_ my concern," Eric said, and his accent was suddenly very pronounced. "She is mine."

Niall waved his hand in a dismissive gesture.

"We have a Covenant," Eric continued, his eyes flashing.

Niall smiled. "Don't try that charade with me, Northman."

Eric didn't even flinch. "You will not take her," he said, and there was threat in the words that would have made a lesser being wary. But my Great-Grandfather was definitely _not _a lesser being.

"She is of my blood," Niall said, and for the first time ever I heard an undercurrent of ice in his voice. "Furthermore, she agreed to this."

I did _what_?

"Now hold up," I said, finally finding my own voice. I started to step around Eric and his arm shot out immediately and he pushed me back behind him. I glared up at my vampire, but he never took his eyes off Niall.

"Eric, I can handle this," I said, but he made no move to step aside. I felt frustration building, and I pushed it back. I reminded myself that Eric's week had been every bit as bad as mine; worse actually, since he had been kidnapped and tortured. And he had every right to feel offended by Niall's declaration. I did my best to calm down and gentle my voice.

"He's not going to hurt me," I said softly, and Eric reluctantly tore his eyes from Niall to look down at me.

"I won't let him take you from me," he said, but the words lost a little something since his fangs were still prominently displayed.

"I'm not going anywhere," I assured him, and I was able to move a little so I could face Niall directly.

"I didn't agree to anything," I said, and I hoped my posture and voice relayed the certainty I felt.

"But you did, my dear," Niall said, and his voice was one again all softness and light.

"No, sir," I said, trying to be both polite and firm. "Claudine told me what you wanted from me. I told her that I would _consider it_, only."

"And have you considered?" Niall asked, his brows raising in a knowing way that made me uneasy.

"I have," I said. "I don't want or need you to find me a mate. I'm with Eric now."

"A vampire," Cyril said, and his tone was derisive. Eric's head whipped around and his lips curled back as he stared at the younger Fae.

"Yes," I said, raising my voice and taking the opportunity to step fully around Eric. I let my gaze move from Cyril to Niall and back. "I'm with a vampire. I love him."

I felt a wash of pride spill across the blood bond. It warmed me.

"He can't give you a child," Niall said softly, and the words struck a chord deep inside I didn't even knew existed until that moment. It cut painfully. Niall noticed my reaction and nodded in understanding. "Our kind are fading, child. I don't ask you to give up your life, I ask only for you to give life to another. You can help us, your family, and in doing so you can also help yourself. The pain you feel is one of sacrifice, and it will not fade with time. What are you willing to abandon to cling to your vampire?"

I stood there, surrounded on all sides, but I suddenly felt truly and painfully alone. I had considered children before, as all women do, I suppose, and when I was with Bill I had briefly dwelled on the fact that life with a vampire would be one of sacrifice. But then, I had thought no more, until this moment. Something in Niall's words poked a stick at a raw spot that I had kept carefully hidden, even from myself.

"Look into your heart," my great-grandfather continued, edging closer to me as he spoke in a soothing voice. "Where do you see yourself in ten years? In twenty or fifty?"

I didn't answer, but the words gave me pause. I had spent the last few years jumping from one crises to another, so much so that I was thrilled with the brief times when all I had to do was go to work and pay my bills. I had literally been taking things day by day. I never really thought about where or how I wanted my life to be at some obscure time in the future.

"You will live a normal human lifespan," Niall went on. "You will find no happiness with a human mate, surely you must know by now that. Your vampire here that you claim to love, will he remain with you as you grow old? When your fragile and mortal body finally gives way and your spirit passes from this world, what will you have to show for your life? Your vampire will remain, just as he is now, and you will be gone."

I didn't look at Eric, but I could feel his uneasiness with the conversation. He never spoke a word; he didn't interrupt or argue, and I wondered if it was because he knew what Niall was saying was true.

"Children are _our_ immortality, my dear," Niall said, and he lay his hand on my arm. "You are my kin, and I do care for you, more than you know. I want only your happiness. I ask for the chance to prove this to you."

I bowed my head, lost in a terrible cloud of conflicting thoughts. I wasn't prepared for something like this, especially not tonight when all I was looking forward to was a blissful homecoming celebration with Eric, and then some blissful and much needed sleep. But now, here I was, standing in my driveway with my Great-grandfather promising me things, offering me a future I would never have if I committed myself to Eric. For the first time in my life, I had a brief flash of myself, holding a baby and singing a lullaby. I was so lost in the vision I was almost in a trance.

"Cyril is physically pleasing to you, I assume?" Niall asked suddenly, intruding on my thoughts.

"What?" I asked, my head reeling and the peculiar pain in my heart serving to keep me distracted. Was he asking me a question?

"Cyril is quite magical and he comes from a solid line. I hoped you would find him acceptable. Was I wrong?"

"No," I stammered, and I felt Eric tense. I shook my head. "I mean, yes, you were wrong...."

I paused to take a deep breath and regroup. I felt like I was losing ground quickly; it was almost beyond comprehension that I was standing here actually having this conversation. I needed to keep my head in the here and now. I knew I was in no state to be making big life-altering decisions at the moment. I knew I would think on Niall's words and their meaning later, but right now I just wanted to go inside to the warmth and familiarity of my own home.

I stood up straight and looked at Cyril. I knew I should be furious with this Fae and his assumptions, but I was aware enough of the world now to understand that not everyone held the same values as I did. Maybe this kind of thing, foreign and abhorrent as it was to me, was a standard practice with the Fae. Arranged marriages, if that's what you could call this, was still common in a lot of the world.

"You're very handsome," I said, and it seemed a tremendous understatement. "And I'm really flattered that you, uh, think I'd be okay as a mate. But I can't agree to this. I just can't. Even if I wasn't already involved with someone else, which I am, I still couldn't just go along with something like this. I don't even know you."

Cyril looked at me for a long moment, then he frowned in confusion. He turned to Niall.

"I don't understand. I thought you said she was already under obligation to you?" he asked, and I felt fury twisting and churning in the bond. I looked up at Eric, not understanding. I had just told Cyril to take a hike, which was what I thought Eric would want. Where was the sudden anger coming from?

"She is," Niall said, and he sounded almost sad. "But I was hoping not to have to press the matter."

"What are you talking about?" I demanded, utterly exasperated with everyone talking about me but not to me.

"You accepted his gift," Cyril said.

"What gift?" I asked, looking at Niall.

"A favor, perhaps?" Cyril intoned.

"No," Eric said, and he spun me around so I was facing him. "Tell me you didn't accept something from him."

I shook my head, closed my eyes, trying to think. From the first moment I met my Great-Grandfather he had told me he wanted to help me. He asked me over and over what it was he could do for me; he was adamant about it, even. The only thing I had ended up requesting was....

"I asked him to find someone for me," I said slowly. "And he did. The address was delivered the very next day, as a matter of fact...." I trailed off when I saw Eric's face blanch.

"What?"

Eric looked over my head at Niall. "She didn't know," he said, and there was something in his voice that sounded very close to desperation.

"Irrelevant," I heard Cyril say, but I wasn't really paying attention. I was still looking at Eric.

Finally, after a long moment of silence on all sides, Eric gazed down at me.

"He tricked you," he said slowly. "Do you remember when I told you that Fae always keep their word?"

I nodded, feeing a little sick. I wasn't sure what was happening here, but it had Eric in a state I rarely saw in him and it frightened me.

"They have an archaic set of laws," Eric continued, and Cyril chuckled.

"This coming from a vampire," he said, and there was amusement in his voice. He had a point, though I didn't say that out loud.

Eric ignored him. "When one Fae presents another with a gift, or bestow a favor, it is considered a binding obligation for that gift or favor to be returned."

"It was just an address," I said, and I started to laugh but stopped quickly when I saw that Eric was deadly serious.

"Hold up," I said, and I took a step back and whipped my head around to Niall. "Are you trying to tell me that because you did me a favor, you expect me to agree to take Cyril as a mate?"

"That would fulfill the obligation, yes," Niall said simply.

I turned back to Eric, not believing what I was hearing. "Well, I just won't do it. I didn't know anything about this! And besides, finding an address and agreeing to an arranged marriage is hardly a fair trade!"

"It doesn't have to be fair," Eric said, and his voice was almost shaking with fury. He turned his eyes to Niall. "And refusing will not be an option, I assume?"

"What do you mean it's not an option?" I said with disbelief. "Of course it is! I don't _have_ to do anything," I turned and faced Niall. "And I won't."

"This isn't how I wanted it to be," my grandfather stated. "Claudine had no right to burden you with this information so soon."

"No," I said and my voice was barely audible. "_You_ had no right to come into my life and trick me into some ridiculous fairy breeding program. You had no right to assume that you could....that I would...."

I stopped then because I couldn't bring myself to say the words. I started to shake and I honestly felt like I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. I wrapped my arms around myself and stared at Niall, and I was a little relieved to see he looked pained.

"This isn't going as I'd hoped," Cyril said softly, and he took one step toward me. Eric intercepted him.

"Touch her and I'll drain you," he said, and his tone left no doubt he would do just that.

Niall reached out and touched Cyril on the shoulder, and the younger Fae stepped back, eyeing Eric cautiously. Then Niall looked at me.

"I shouldn't have come tonight," he said, and he sounded truly apologetic. "You've had a most trying time; you're tired and you should rest. We can discuss this at another time, child."

"I won't let you have her," Eric said.

"You have to rest during the day," Niall reminded him, and I sucked in a sharp breath. Was that a threat against Eric or me? "I understand you feel I'm infringing on your territory, Northman, but there are situations in play in our world that require action. I have many that depend on me, certainly you can understand that. I daresay in my position, you would do the same."

Eric remained silent, and he and Niall regarded one another for a long while. Eric was larger, physically more powerful than my Great-Grandfather, but they were both roughly the same age. And I had no doubt that Niall had formidable abilities. I feared that if it came to blows, Eric could be badly hurt. Niall had already offered to kill Eric once, and when he offered he sure didn't sound like he was worried he couldn't do it.

I went to Eric and placed my hand on his chest. He didn't look at me, but I knew I had his attention.

"Let's go," I said, and after a slight hesitation, Eric looked down at me and I tried to smile. I pleaded with him through my eyes, and hopefully through the bond. I was exhausted on every level. I just wanted to get inside.

Eric seemed to understand, and after a final and pointed look at Niall, he turned both of us and started walking back up to the porch. At the last second I turned around, wondering if Niall and Cyril had already popped back to wherever they came from. They hadn't.

Cyril took the opportunity to catch my eye, and he took a few steps forward.

"It's true you don't know me," he called, his voice floating in the air like music. "But that can change. I'd never force myself on you, that is not our way." His emerald eyes blazed with sincerity as he spoke, and I found myself relaxing somewhat. "Perhaps I can come visit you another time and we can speak privately."

I didn't even know how to respond to that, and Eric was about to answer for me in a very physical fashion, but right then Niall made a gesture and he and Cyril vanished.

I stood there on the porch for a good while, and Eric just stared at the place where Niall and Cyril had last stood. He was completely still, a pale statue in the moonlight. I started to fumble in my purse again, looking for my keys, and my hands were so shaky I spilled everything out onto the porch. I cursed under my breath and kneeled down to gather the items, and then something inside me came loose and tears began to fall. My vision blurred, and I couldn't see, so I just patted around on the wooden planks of the porch, trying to find my keys.

I felt powerful arms take hold of me, and then I found myself pressed against Eric's chest. He was kneeling beside me, and stroking my hair and I just sobbed into his shirt, soaking it. It wasn't just the situation with Niall, I knew, it was everything that had happened for the past many days causing the flood.

It was my newfound love for my vampire, and then having him stolen from me. It was seeing him cut and burnt and tortured in the coffin. It was watching Bill fall under Izo's blade, and it was seeing Amelia unconscious and bloodied. It was Victor's violation and all that happened in Nevada. It was the knowledge that Eric had tied his life to mine in a secret and sacred way I still didn't fully understand. It was the trickery of Niall, and the realization that I may be coerced into having a child with a beautiful stranger. And finally, it was the alternative to that scenario, which was I may never get to hold a child of my own in my arms.

I cried and cried, and somewhere during the flood Eric scooped me up and managed to get me into the house. He brought me to my own room, to my own bed, and sat me down. He kneeled in front of me.

"I won't let them take you from me," Eric said and I just shook my head. He placed his hands on my face and forced me to look into his eyes.

"I will not allow it," he said again. "Niall won't be able to hide you from me."

"What are you talking about?" I asked, and the words came out broken through sobs. "Where would they take me?"

"To the Fae realm."

My heart skipped a beat and for a moment my tears almost subsided. I knew there were places for Fae, but it had never occurred to me that I would see it. If Niall could take me there, would I be able to come back? I shook my head again, harder, and stood up, clenching my eyes tight. This was too much, too much. I felt light-headed and I may have collapsed if not for Eric.

"I will not allow it," he repeated emphatically, "Even if I have to take you away."

And though I'm sure he meant well, that was the last thing I wanted or needed to hear right then. We had just gotten back from Nevada, from a trial we had barely escaped. Eric said the alternative was to spend the rest of our lives running, and we decided together we couldn't live like that. And now he was telling me he'd take me away? Was that supposed to be a promise or a threat?

What was happening to me, I wondered? How had my world been reduced to this point, when I was either running from or into danger? When the people closest to me were also the ones I had to fear?

I couldn't even think straight anymore; it was like my head had detached from the rest of me. I felt Eric's cool hands on my arms, supporting me, and the phrase _mental breakdown _came to mind as a sudden wave of fury took hold of me.

I pushed Eric away and strode across the room before whirling back on him, stress and fear and worry - all the things I thought I could cross off my list for a while - were back in full force and I didn't have the emotional reserves to deal with it anymore.

"Why do you think you can do this to me? Where does this, this _arrogance _come from that you think you can make demands of me? Or trick me into doing what you want?"

Eric's brow furrowed, and he looked at me in utter confusion. "Sookie...."

"No!" I screamed, and I planted myself right in front of him. I was infuriated at Niall and his deception, not Eric. But right then every single manipulation Eric had ever pulled on me started running through my head.

"How will you stop him?" I demanded, and I wasn't really wanting an answer. Eric reached for me and I tossed up my arms and pushed him away.

A part of my mind knew I was lashing out at Eric because he was simply the closest person at the moment; a part of me knew it was wrong and an even bigger part wanted to stop. But I couldn't. Niall's words had managed to upset the delicate balance I had achieved; it had thrown a wrench into my relationship with Eric and even worse, I was suddenly questioning my own judgment. I hated that. I hated it so much.

"Sookie...."

"No! There's nothing you can do to help me with this. You're asleep during the day! Niall can snatch me up whenever he wants and cart me off to who knows where! You're not a fairy, you can't enter their world! You're a vampire!"

I spit out the last word like an accusation, like an insult, and in a moment of sheer rage like I had never experienced, I lost every ounce of self control. Eric was reaching for me again, and without thinking, I reared back and hit him as hard as I could. The moment my fist impacted with his cheek, I felt a surge of power. And it felt great. I wanted to hurt him, I realized. I wanted to punish him for every single misdeed every person in my life had ever committed. I wanted to exact vengeance for my life spinning so out of control.

Eric barely registered the blow; his face turned to the side but other than that he showed no reaction for a moment. But then he whipped his head back to me, his fangs snapped down and his eyes blazed into mine.

I should have been scared, but I wasn't. I was too far gone, riding the tide of anger. I was tired of this game; I was sick to death of having people that supposedly cared for me manipulating my life and expecting me to just smile and nod and assume they knew what was best for me. I was tired of being frightened. I wanted to prove to myself that I still had control; that I was still in charge of my own life; that I wasn't weak and helpless.

I drew my arm back to hit Eric again, but he grabbed my wrist before the blow could land and with his free hand he grabbed me behind my neck and pulled me to him, hard.

I struggled, but it was useless. He kept a solid grip on me, and he just watched me, expressionless but with bared fangs, while I fought and struggled and cried and pounded my fists on his chest. I might as well have been an insect trying to fly through a closed window for all the good I was doing.

My adrenaline rush started to fail, and my movements began to slow, and that's when Eric made his move. His took my face in his hands and kissed me roughly. I tried to pull back, but the more I tried to get away the tighter he held me.

"Let me go!" I demanded when he finally freed my lips, and my voice was hoarse from crying. "Now!"

He didn't answer. Instead, he pushed me back onto the bed, and he was on me before I could form a thought. He held his body atop mine while he continued to kiss me. He didn't let up, not even a tiny amount, and he parted my lips with his tongue. The tears were still streaming, and a few times he paused to lick at the salty fluids. It could have been minutes, or an hour, but little by little by my fury began to subside under Eric's relentless touch. Once I had calmed down to a level where I was almost thinking clearly, I felt the blood bond humming and sparking with residual anger on both ends, and other equally primal emotions.

I took hold of his face and kissed him back, matching his intensity. I wanted him badly and I wanted him immediately. I wrapped my arms around Eric's neck and felt his hair weave between my fingers. I pulled at it and he grunted, then in answer he did the same to me. He pressed against me, spreading my legs, and used his hands to force my head back so he could kiss my throat. Then his hands began to roam, pulling and tearing at my clothes. My tears had dried under his assault, and my anger had morphed into something else entirely. I writhed under Eric's body, grinding my hips and nipping at his flesh.

Eric was like a man possessed as he ripped my blouse and bra and threw them aside. His mouth found my breasts while his hands divested me of the remainder of my clothes. He had his own off even faster, and before I knew what was happening we were clawing and gripping one another like feral creatures. All reason was lost in a fog of brutal desire and desperate need.

Eric had always been gentle with me during our lovemaking, but this time it was different, so different. He squeezed my breasts and my hips until they ached, he kissed my lips until I knew they were bruised. When he entered me, he did so powerfully, thrusting inside me in a movement so swift and strong I cried out in shock. He bit my shoulder then, his fangs slamming into my flesh with such force my breath caught in my throat. He drank greedily from me while he pounded away; every stroke, each thrust was deliberate and raw, like exclamations, like demands. He told me he preferred to let his actions speak rather than words, and I knew exactly what his body was saying. He was claiming me, owning me, telling me in no uncertain terms that I was his and his alone and he would never, ever share me.

I was barely able to breathe during the assail on my body. Eric was pressed heavily against my chest, and he was keeping me almost immobile under his great form. He growled in hunger and grunted in desire, and similar sounds were spilling from my own lips. I pulled my legs up and locked my knees against his sides and his movements became even more intense, faster. He raised off me a little and looked into my eyes; I saw that his were wild and dark, and in a terrible moment of recognition, I placed his expression; it was the same as he wore when he ripped Victor Madden into shreds. For a second I was frightened, but then he kissed me again, and something about the taste of my blood on his lips sent an eruption of naked want right through me. I closed my eyes in pure ecstasy, feeling almost high from the raging emotions and the rush of endorphins coursing through me from the dual sensations of pleasure and pain.

I felt Eric's fangs once again penetrate my skin, this time on my neck, and without conscious thought I twisted my head as far as I could and my teeth made contact with his shoulder. I bit hard, harder than I ever had before and Eric barked out a curse, or an oath and threw his head back, and his hair whipped against my face. His eyes were squeezed shut and his mouth was open and stained red with my blood as I drank him into me. He continued to dominate me, thrusting over and over and over until I felt his body tense. My own release was imminent and I used my nails on his back to spur him on. He cried out again, as did I, and we rode the wave together, our bodies joined, clenching and spasming in a wild haze of rapture.

When it was over, Eric lay on top of me, licking at the wounds on my neck, while I struggled to control my breathing that was coming in shuddering bursts. I barely had the strength in my arms to hold him. I was aching in many places, but I wondered if the blood I took would soon cure me of that. I hoped not. Eric would have to leave me very soon to take rest, and the soreness would be a welcome reminder, a physical mark that would remind me of this night. I didn't want to forget.

"Have I hurt you?" he asked me after a while, and he moved so he was lying beside me, propped up on an elbow and gazing down at me.

"A little," I answered honestly, but I smiled.

He regarded me silently for a bit, and I saw turmoil in his eyes, and felt it, too. I reached out and touched his face where I had struck him, shame welling inside me for my outburst.

"I'm sorry," I said softly. "I don't know what came over me."

"No," he said, and took my hand from his face and kissed it. "You're right to be angry. I'm angry as well. I didn't see this coming."

And he did look mad as hell. His face and eyes were dark, and his jaw was set in a hard line.

"I didn't see it either," I whispered.

"I never would have agreed to introduce you to Niall had I known why he really wanted you," Eric continued. "He was very good at concealing his intentions. I didn't even think to warn you about their traditions. Fae so rarely interact with vampires, and even less with humans. I never suspected he would approach you as.....a potential breeder. He used me to get to you."

He said the final words with a disgust he didn't even try to veil, and I appreciated that.

"So how does it feel?" I asked, and I rolled to my side, tucked a pillow under my cheek and looked up at my vampire. "To have someone beat you at your own game?"

"It sucks," he said without hesitation, and something about hearing those words come from Eric started me to giggling.

"This is no laughing matter," Eric said seriously, and I knew he was right, of course. I silenced my giggles and moved closer to him. He pulled me to his side and I tucked my head in the nook of his shoulder and he wrapped one big arm around me. I feel very small, and very safe.

"I don't know what to do," I whispered. "I can't believe my own Great-Grandfather would try to do this to me. I really thought he may have loved me."

Eric was silent, and I closed my eyes. I lay there enjoying the silence of his mind, and the feel of his body against mine. I tried not to think about anything else, and just appreciate the moment.

"You must tell me everything Niall has said to you," Eric said suddenly and I sighed. So much for not thinking about things. "And everything the fairy Claudine has told you, as well."

"It's not much," I said.

"Tell me anyway, as much as you can remember. Leave nothing out."

I thought back, and then I proceeded to recount, as best as I could, what Claude and Claudine had told me about my telepathy and my so-called essential spark. I told him that Niall wanted me to take a mate of pure Fae blood, so I could continue his line. I tried to remain calm and emotionless, but it didn't work after a while. My voice got hotter and louder as I spoke, but Eric never interrupted; he just listened quietly until I was done.

After my monologue, we lay there for a time, not speaking. I got the impression that Eric was deep in thought, and I was hesitant to distract him.

"Do you wish to mate with the fairy?" he asked me after a bit, and I sat up a little and stared at him in surprise.

"No, of course I don't wish to _mate_ with the fairy!" I said.

"What Niall told you was true," he continued in a detached sort of way. "If having a child, or children, is your wish, I cannot give that to you. I know his words upset you."

I lay back down, feeling my face begin to redden. Of course, Eric had felt my anxiety and confusion when Niall asked me about my future plans. I didn't know what to say, mainly because I wasn't sure how I felt about that yet.

"I don't want the fairy," I repeated, speaking softly into Eric's chest. He moved his arm a little and started playing with a strand of my hair.

"Niall says your telepathy is not from his blood?" Eric asked, abruptly changing the subject.

"No," I answered. "He said he thinks that must have come from Fintan's human side. My ability to block out thoughts, the shield or whatever you want to call it, is Fae."

"And he thinks this is so rare a talent, so certain it is from his line, that he would seek you out, endear himself to you, and even manipulate you into cooperation?"

I frowned, not sure what Eric was getting at with this. "Well, yes, I guess so."

"Interesting," Eric said.

I tilted my head to look at him and saw a hint of a smile on his face.

"What?" I asked. "What are you thinking?"

He rolled me onto my back and gazed down on me, his hair falling forward, framing his face.

"I'm thinking how much I'd enjoy having that impertinent Fairy, Cyril, for a nightcap. Every single drop of him."

I stifled another giggle. Jelous much, Viking?

"I wasn't enough for you, huh?" I teased, and he smiled and kissed me, long as gentle. My lips were definitely bruised, I decided.

"You are wonderful, my lover," Eric said when our lips finally parted. "But I will never have enough of you. In fact, if I didn't have to return to Shreveport, I would greatly enjoy having you again...and again..."

He kissed my mouth once more, then my neck and shoulder where he had bitten me.

"I don't want to leave you," he said. "But I must."

"I know," I whispered, trying and failing to keep the sadness from my voice. I wanted to keep him with me. I wished he could lay down there beside me in my bed and we could fall asleep in each other's arms. _Another sacrifice_, a little voice whispered in my head, but I pushed it away.

"I'll need to catch up with Pam when I rise," Eric stated as he slid out of bed and started to get dressed. "I will also have to survey the damage to Fangtasia. But I will come to you tomorrow night, as soon as I can."

I sat up in bed, pulling the blankets up under my arms.

"What should I do if Niall comes back?" I asked. "What if he tries to take me to...to the Fae realm with him?"

Eric sat on the edge of the bed, and watched me with a very Eric-like expression. I knew that look; he was on to something.

"Trust me," he said, and he kissed my forehead. He stood up, winked at me and then was out of the room at vampire speed, leaving me very confused.

I hopped out of bed when I heard the front door open and close. I padded down the hall and peeked out the curtains on the window and saw Eric start his shiny, new car and begin to drive away. I noticed he had his cell phone at his ear. And he was smiling.

Oh, yes. He was _definitely_ on to something.

_- To be continued_

_A/N This was a shorty chapter (compared to some!) Hope you enjoyed the Saturday morning lemons! (For those that go back to re-read, the Claudine/Sookie conversation about the Fae was waaaay back in chapter 19) I know the updates have been delayed lately, grown-up life keeps getting in the way of my playtime! Darnit! Thanks again for all the wonderful and generous reviews, you have no idea what they mean to me! And thanks again to my Beta, Meads. Sweet Viking dreams to you, dahling! _


	31. Chapter 31

**Know Thyself**

**Chapter Thirty-One**

To my amazement, I actually slept dreamlessly and peacefully after Eric departed. I chalked it up to being back at home, in my own bed, but a little piece of me wondered if perhaps I was becoming accustomed to the seemingly endless disasters that had become an unwelcome fixture in my life lately.

I really hoped not.

I glanced at the clock when I rose, and saw it was mid-afternoon. I showered and dressed in something of a daze, like my body was on auto-pilot, while my thoughts were turned to Eric. The soreness I had hoped to retain had faded away, but it didn't matter; I remembered every touch, every word we had spoken the night before.

I replayed it all, the good and the bad, over and over in my head. It was a way to keep myself from thinking too hard on the situation with my Great-Grandfather, a situation Eric seemed confident he would resolve. Exactly how he would accomplish this was another thing I didn't want to think on too hard.

I walked to the kitchen, grabbed a can of soda and drank it down quickly, realizing for the first time I was absolutely parched. While I tossed together a quick lunch, I started making a mental list of things I needed to do. I had to call Amelia and check in on her, I needed to call Sam and find out if I still had a job after all the time I had taken off. I also needed to take that big check from Felipe' De Castro to the bank, and that was a thought that made me grin with anticipation. After what happened in Nevada, I hoped the King hadn't decided to place a stop payment on it!

I was just taking my first bite when a loud, repetitive pounding began, shaking the entire house, and scaring me half to death. I froze, my heart rate flying, and I instinctively jumped up from my chair as a sudden adrenaline rush pumped through me, almost making me light-headed. Someone was outside, I realized. Someone was outside my house and they were...hammering? After my shock subsided I was able to place the noise. I walked toward the back door, my mind fully open, and I heard a trail of consciousness in a voice I recognized immediately.

I ran the last distance to the door and flung it open in shock. I didn't even bother to slip on shoes before I bolted down the porch steps and into the driveway. I turned my gaze upward, to a figure perched atop a ladder that was leaned against my house.

"Lucas!" I cried, and the red-haired teenager smiled down at me.

"Hey!" he said, his smile becoming broader when he saw the stunned look I was no doubt wearing. "I didn't wake you up did I?"

I blinked a few times, then shook me head. "No, I was up but...what are you doing here?"

"Fixing this piece of your gutter," he said, and he turned back and started hammering again, each strike resonating sharply in the cool air. I waved my hand to get his attention, and moved closer to the ladder.

"Lucas!" I screamed, and he stopped his work and looked back down at me. "I mean, what are you doing _here_, in Bon Temps?"

"Oh!" he said cheerfully, and started stepping down the ladder, jumping the last few feet. "Didn't Eric tell you? I work for Bill now."

My eyes went wide, and I huffed out a little laugh.

"You work for Bill?" I repeated.

"Yep! He was impressed with the research I did, and I guess he's going to be expanding his computer business and he needed a daytime guy." Lucas smiled proudly. "That's me!"

"Wow," I said slowly.

"Eric negotiated it all with Russell."

"Negotiated what?" I asked suspiciously.

"My transfer. I guess I'm pretty valuable, since Bill said Eric paid a lot to get Russell to release me."

My mouth fell open, and I stared at Lucas in utter shock as the pieces began to fall into place. Clearly, this was the favor Bill had decided to demand of Eric. Lucas seemed okay with his being bartered off, and I knew this was the way vampires tended to treat humans, but it still made me feel a little sick to my stomach.

"Are you okay with this?" I asked slowly. "I mean, you know you don't have to work for Bill if you don't want to, right? People can't be bought and sold like property..."

Lucas just laughed. "Yeah, it sounds pretty bad, doesn't it, when you say it that way. But I'm cool with it. Russell is a good guy, he asked me if it was okay before he gave me to Eric. And Bill seems like a decent guy. Do you know he recycles?"

I shook my head and breathed a sigh of relief, feeling better about this strange turn of events. I could hear in Lucas' mind that he was beyond thrilled to be working for Bill.

"Okay, so why are you over here fixing my house?" I asked, raising my eyebrows.

"Well, Bill told me part of my job would be to help you out during the day if you needed anything, and when I came by earlier to drop off your car, you didn't answer the door and I noticed the gutters..."

"Whoa!" I said, and held up a hand. "What do you mean you were dropping off my car?"

Lucas frowned, and pointed to the shiny blue Mazda parked next to my old car.

"That's yours," he said. "Eric bought it from Russell, and Bill drove it back from Jackson last night. He told me to bring it over here to you."

"Eric bought me a car?" I said, my voice flat.

Lucas looked a little uncomfortable at my reaction, and he shifted his feet.

"I guess he didn't tell you about that, either, huh?"

"No, he didn't," I almost hissed. Eric had made a few cracks about my old car, sure, and buying a better one _had_ crossed my mind, but the independent woman in me was infuriated at having Eric decide what I needed without asking me. Again.

"It's a really nice car," Lucas said, clearly trying to lighten my mood. "It's not new, but it's only a few years old. There's a CD player, and the mileage is pretty low. Bill said it drove great."

Lucas paused and reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys and offered them to me. I almost slapped his hand away, but I reminded myself that this wasn't Lucas' fault. I also reminded myself that some women might be thrilled with having a guy buy them a new car. Or at least a gently used car. I wondered what was wrong with me that I couldn't seem to just take the gift with a smile and be appreciative.

But I didn't need to burden poor Lucas with my inner cave-woman rage, so I took the keys and did my best to smile.

"Thanks for bringing it over," I said. "Have you had lunch? I was just sitting down to eat when I heard you out here. I can make you a sandwich?"

Lucas grinned hugely. "That would be great! Bill doesn't have any food over there, and I don't know where the nearest grocery might be."

"Come on in," I said, already heading for the door.

I fixed Lucas up a plate of food, and while we ate I filled him in on all the happenings in Bon Temps. I tried to keep it general; location of the stores, banks, restaurants, but a few times I crossed the line into gossip. It was an easy conversation, a simple give-and-take between two people that had very little in common besides their association, by choice or chance, with certain vampires. And Lucas had such a kind mind it didn't even bother me much that he was such a loud broadcaster.

"So did Yasuka come back with you and Bill?" I asked during a lull in the conversation. I already knew she had, Lucas had been thinking about her off and on, but I was really curious what the plan was going to be in regards to the young vampire. And it wasn't like Eric had offered up any information, I mused to myself.

"Yeah, she's at Bill's. They both had to squeeze into this little room under the floor."

And Lucas was pretty jealous about that, I found out. I had to really focus so I wouldn't giggle at his typical teenage reaction. I knew he had nothing to worry about with Bill. Vampires didn't get involved with other vampires, at least that was the way I understood it, and going after young Yasuka would be abhorrent to Bill's code of conduct.

"So what's going to happen to her," I asked, taking a bit of my sandwich to cover any reaction my face might be betraying. "Is she staying with Bill, too?"

Lucas looked away for a moment, and I thought a saw a flash of sadness on his face. "I don't think so. Maybe for a while, I guess. But Bill said she belonged to Eric, so she might be going to someplace called Fangtasia."

"That's Eric's bar," I explained.

"Bill said it would better for her to be trained by a female vampire; he mentioned someone named Pam? Especially since the vamp that made her was a real...well, he wasn't nice to her."

"No," I stated, "He wasn't."

I knew Bill had a point, but I had a hard time picturing little Yasuka working at that tourist bar. I had an even harder time picturing _any_ of the female vampires there as being the motherly type. I smiled a bit, picturing Pam explaining the vampire equivalent of the birds and the bees to the girl.

Lucas' thoughts had turned dark and sullen, and I tried to shake him out of his mood by asking him what sort of work he'd be doing for Bill. He did perk up some then, and he rattled off a pretty comprehensive list of duties Bill had apparently discussed with him during their drive back from Mississippi.

"Oh!" Lucas said excitedly. "Bill is going to send me to college!"

I leaned forward, smiling. "Really? To the one near Shreveport?"

Lucas shrugged. "I guess so, if that's the closest one. I'll only be able to take one or two classes each semester, since Bill will need me. But check this out, I get to stay at Bill's place, he's going to pay me a regular salary _and_ he's going to pay for my school!"

"That's fantastic!" I said, and I could hear the jubilant thoughts streaming through Lucas' head. He had never thought much of himself, and he had never even entertained the idea that he would be able to go to college. He was over the moon, and I found I was almost just as happy as he was. It was always nice when good things happened to good people, and it was even nicer to see a kid with Lucas' rocky background catch a break.

"And he told me when I finished school," Lucas continued, "that he would turn me."

I almost chocked on the drink of tea I was swallowing, and I coughed and felt my eyes start to water.

"Are you okay?" Lucas asked, and I stared at him in shock and waved my hand to let him know I was fine. It took me a few moments to be able to speak, and when I did I know I sounded horrified.

"Did you say Bill was going to turn you? He's going to make you a vampire?"

Lucas frowned, clearly upset at my reaction. "Yeah. We talked about it some on the way back. I told him it was what I really wanted, and he gave me this long speech about how being a vampire isn't as glamorous as the television and movies make it seem, and how it was a big decision..."

"And he's absolutely right!" I exclaimed, leaning forward. "I can't believe he said he would kill you!"

"Well, I told him I wanted it," Lucas said, and for the first time since I'd met him, his voice became harsh. "I told him he didn't even have to pay me to work for him if he'd just turn me. But he said he wouldn't do it until I was twenty five and completed school."

"Oh my God," I breathed, and I felt like the life had been knocked right out of me.

"He said he wanted me to be at least twenty five, because that's when the reasoning center of the brain has fully developed. He wanted to make sure it was what I really wanted, since there is no going back." Lucas paused, and averted his eyes. "I guess there's always the possibility I'll change my mind. I have to wait six years."

"Six years is nothing compared to eternity," I said, trying hard to bite back my revulsion and reminding myself that I had no right to push my views on others, and even less right to assume or expect others should agree with me.

Even without telepathy, it was easy to see that Lucas had tossed in the last part about maybe changing his mind to appease me. He had no intention of changing his mind, I knew. I tried to find a way to make the situation okay in my head, and the best I could come up with was that if Lucas was dead set on becoming a vampire, he would eventually find someone to turn him. It was better if he stayed with Bill and went to school. And Bill would be a good maker.

We sat in a bit of an uncomfortable silence after that, until I asked Lucas if he'd like to take a ride over to the Walmart and pick up a few things. They had added in a small grocery section a few years back, I told him, and it would give me a chance to try out my new car,I added with a small smile.

He agreed, not much to my surprise. Teenage boys seemed to be virtual black holes for food, and from the way Lucas had eaten the lunch I'd prepared he'd proven no different. Besides, Bill didn't really like to shop, especially for human food, so I would be doing him a favor. Heaven knows I owed him some big ones!

The drive to Walmart was chatty, I pointed out various places, and Lucas seemed to be trying to memorize the roads and streets and landmarks. I reluctantly admitted to myself that the Mazda did drive really well, and it was far nicer and in much better condition than the one I had bought from Tara.

I briefly considered that I would undoubtedly be driving to Shreveport more often now, and this car was better equipped to handle those extra miles. I didn't doubt at all that Eric had considered that little fact when he decided to buy it. I smiled and shook my head, wondering how I ever managed to fall in love with a vampire like the Viking. He always seemed to be thinking and acting at least two steps ahead of me; ahead of everyone. It was fascinating, and infuriating, but I vowed that somehow, some way, I would catch up with him. And when I did, he might rue the day he ever tied his life to mine!

Once at the Walmart, Lucas and I became a shopping force to be reckoned with. He hit the menswear section to get some inexpensive business casual type of clothes Bill told him he would need, and while he was occupied with that, I hit the grocery section and loaded up a cart with healthy dietary staples.

We met up after about half an hour, and Lucas tossed in a few more items he said he 'needed' - which turned out to be bags of chips and pizza rolls and other things I was fairly certain would make Bill's stomach turn. I figured he was just going to have to deal with it. We also picked up a couple cases of TrueBlood, which created a quite a little mental stir at the check-out counter, as we ended up right in front of a fellow with a white and yellow Fellowship of the Sun tee-shirt. I nearly stuck my tongue out at him when I heard his thoughts. Nearly.

I was surprised when Lucas pulled out a fairly sizable stack of bills to pay; I had been prepared to cover him if he was short. He glanced at me, saw my expression, and smiled.

"I never had anything to spend my money on in Mississippi," he shrugged. "And Bill said he'd pay me back for the clothes, even though I told him he didn't have to."

"You and Bill seem to have already worked a lot of things out," I ventured as we loaded the bags into the trunk of the car.

"It was a long drive," Lucas said, then he laughed. "We had a lot of time to talk about things. Out of curiosity, does the guy ever smile?"

I giggled as I unlocked the doors and slid into the car. "Yes, he smiles. He can be really funny, too, but he's also very private. And when it comes to his work, he's very serious."

"I noticed that," Lucas said and he clicked his seat-belt.

"Did he tell you that he and I dated for a while?" I asked.

I felt Lucas' surprise even before he answered.

"No way!"

"Way," I said, still grinning. If Lucas was going to be around Bill and I, he was bound to find out or figure it out eventually. I thought it was best to just get it out of the way now. Plus I thought if Lucas knew Bill had dated a human, he might feel a little more comfortable around him. Some vamps still viewed humans with disdain - thinly veiled, most of the time. I wanted Lucas to know Bill wasn't one of those, in case he had any doubt.

"And now you're with Eric," Lucas mused. "And he's Bill's boss, right?"

"Eric is Sheriff of Area Five, and Bill lives in Area Five," I explained carefully, tossing Lucas a pointed glance.

"Sorry," he said, looking away. "Sore subject?"

I sighed. "Not particularly. We all get along, sort of, most of the time. But it's not like we're all three going to go out dancing together, either, you know?"

"I get it," Lucas said. "I won't mention anything."

"That might be best," I said. "I only told you about my past relationship with Bill to let you know a little more about him. I wouldn't have dated him if he wasn't a good man. And he'll be a good boss, but he plays things pretty close to the vest. He might be hard to get to know. And he might seem a little cold at first. He's really organized," I continued, thinking of things that might help Lucas adjust to his new situation. "He appreciates good manners, and he can be real old-fashioned about some things."

Lucas laughed then, and I looked at him. "Yeah, when we got home, he was really clear about how Yasuka wasn't allowed in my room. Ever."

"Right," I said. "You can probably expect some more of that."

"Thanks," he said. "I appreciate your giving me a heads-up."

"No problem," I said, and then we were pulling into Bill's driveway.

We took the bags inside, and I loaded up the refrigerator while Lucas went to take care of his new clothes. I stood by the window when I was done, and crossed my arms over my chest as I watched the sun, which was just starting to descend. I couldn't help but smile, knowing my vampire would soon be waking. Just thinking about him filled me with a longing that was almost uncomfortable. It wasn't really a sexual longing, just an intense desire to be near him.

I considered that this was the first time he and I had been apart since I told him I loved him, since I found out about the significance of the knife and our one-way covenant. I wondered if our blood bond was stronger now, if that was the pull I was feeling. I closed my eyes, and tried to trace the sensation, tried to figure out where it was coming from. It felt like butterflies in my stomach, stirring me from the inside out, making it hard to think about anything else. I lost myself in the feeling, and I didn't know how long I just stood there in front of that window, but when I finally opened my eyes again, the sun was lost.

"Sookie," I heard Bill say from behind me, and I jumped.

"I didn't mean to startle you," he said as I turned to face him.

"It's okay," I said. "I was spacing out, I guess."

"You were connecting with Eric," he replied.

I looked away and felt my face turn red.

"It's natural," Bill said, and he came closer to me, his eyes boring into me. "I've never had a blood bond, but I understand they can be quite powerful. Especially when the vampire has an emotional investment in the bond."

I nodded, very little, then cleared my throat and tried to change the very uncomfortable subject. I pointed to the empty bags on the table.

"I drove Lucas out to Walmart. We stocked up the refrigerator, and got a few cases of True Blood for you and Yasuka."

"Thank you," Bill replied, still looking at me with that intense, dark gaze of his.

"So I guess you decided to expand your business after all," I said, smiling even though every fiber in my being was wanting to go hop in my new car and drive to Shreveport.

"Yes," Bill replied. "I considered the conversation we had in the car, when you and Pam were trying to convince me to hire an assistant. Lucas will be quite capable, I believe. He's very bright and eager to learn."

I snorted. "Okay, first of all, I was the only saying you needed to _hire_ someone to help. Pam was telling you to create one. And speaking of that, I heard about the deal you made with Lucas."

"You disapprove," Bill stated without emotion.

"You know I do," I replied. "And I thought you said you weren't ready for that, anyway."

"I have six years to prepare," Bill said. "It's a unique relationship, a maker and a child. I find myself becoming intrigued by the idea as the years pass. It's an enormous responsibility, but I understand that being a maker can be very rewarding."

"Well, as long as it's all about you," I muttered and Bill's face clamped down.

"It's not like the boy won't have a choice, Sookie. I'm making him wait until he is of age to make a rational and informed decision. He'll be going to school, he'll be working; he will be around both humans and vampires. The final choice will be his, not mine. I would never turn a human against their will. You know this."

"Yes," I replied softly, feeling more than a little chastised. "I do know. I'm sure you'll be a good maker, if that's what happens."

"Hopefully."

"Oh! That reminds me, are you really planning to send Yasuka to Fangtasia?" I asked incredulously.

"That's up to Eric. He took her in, plus they shared the same sire."

"Is that a big deal?" I asked.

"Since their maker has gone to final death, Eric is under a certain obligation to see to her care since she is so young."

"So, he's like an older brother?"

Bill smiled. "Something like that. But even without that tie, she would still owe fealty to Eric, since he is Sheriff."

It sounded like the whole thing made complete sense to him, and I actually found it kind of a sweet in a way, that older vamps were expected to take care of the younger ones. I turned back to the window, feeling the fluttering in my stomach starting to crank up a notch, and I took a deep breath to steady myself.

"What is it like?" Bill asked, coming to stand beside me. I looked over at him curiously. "The blood bond. What does it feel like?"

"Is it that obvious?" I asked, and I half smiled. Bill didn't respond, just waited silently.

"It's hard to describe," I said softly after a moment. "I can tell when he's nearby. And I'm always just...aware of him."

"Is it distracting?" Bill asked, seeming truly curious.

"Not really," I answered, trying to find the words to describe the sensation. "It's almost like...wearing the same ring every day. It doesn't bother me, and I don't really notice it, but I know it's there. Does that make sense?"

Bill nodded and I paused for moment to gather my thoughts.

"I can also pick up on his emotions, and sometimes I can't even tell which ones are mine and which ones are his, but that seems to be getting clearer." I continued to stare out the window into the darkness, feeling the gentle pull inside me that was Eric. "And when I'm with him, or talk to him, I feel happy. Absurdly happy, and safe, and warm. And when we're apart..." I trailed off, realizing what I had told Bill was possibly more than he wanted to hear.

"You miss him terribly," Bill finished the sentence softly for me, and I looked over at him and nodded.

"Do you truly have a covenant with him, Sookie?"

I opened my mouth to answer, then closed it again and looked down at my feet. I felt afraid to answer, not that I didn't trust Bill with the truth, but because I didn't want him to think badly of Eric for binding himself to me without getting the same in return. I had a feeling other vampires would frown on that, perhaps view it as a weakness.

"I thought it might have been an elaborate ruse Eric had concocted," Bill prompted.

I smiled to myself. It was more elaborate than Bill knew, and more confusing. I held my silence, trying to find a way to answer.

"It's best that Eric and I have a covenant," I said, choosing my words carefully and once again tip-toeing the fine line between truth and lies.

"I understand," Bill said, but I knew he truly didn't. I wondered how in the world I was going to be able to live like this, dodging questions and avoiding conversations. I wondered if I would ever be free to just be myself.

"I have to go," I said suddenly, shaking my head to clear away the heavy thoughts that were threatening to overtake me.

I headed for the door, and Bill intercepted me.

"Would you like me to see you home?" he asked, and my immediate response was to say no, but then I considered the situation with Niall. Not that I thought Bill had much of a chance at stopping my Great-Grandfather if he decided to come snatch me and take to Fae town, but maybe Niall would think twice if I wasn't alone. Or maybe I was fooling myself.

"I drove," I said, and smiled, embarrassed.

"Give me one minute," Bill replied, and he was gone in a flash. I heard him talking in another room a moment later, letting Yasuka and Lucas know he would be gone for a short while, then he was back. He paused right as I opened the door and called back.

"And remember what I said, you two. There will be no feeding in this house! There is plenty of synthetic blood in the refrigerator."

I placed my hand over my mouth, and hurried out the door before bursting into laughter.

"It's not funny, Sookie," Bill told me as he opened the car door for me. "I don't know how long Yasuka will be here, but while she is I will not allow her to endanger anyone. She's still very young, her control is questionable."

Bill started down the driveway and made the little turn toward my house.

"And you think simply _telling_ two teenagers _not_ to do something will be effective?" I asked him with some amusement.

Bill jerked his head toward me and I cocked an eyebrow at him. He growled a little under his breath and stepped on the accelerator.

He pulled up in front of my house a few minutes later, and I remembered my manners and invited him inside to have a blood. He looked at me, then looked back across the cemetery toward his house, then back at me. I took his arm and started hauling him to the porch.

"Relax. I'm sure they're fine, _daddy._"

Bill didn't look at all convinced, but he followed me into the house and took a seat on my sofa while I heated up a blood for him in the microwave. I shook it to distribute the heat, then came back to the living room and handed it to him before taking a seat beside him.

"Claudine was here today, I assume?" he asked after taking a drink, and my eyes went wide.

"No, I haven't seen Claudine since before Fangtasia was attacked. Why would you say that?"

"This room smells of Fae," he said, and his eyes narrowed.

I sucked in a breath, and before I knew what I was doing I was on my feet and looking around fearfully.

"There's no one here now," Bill told me, standing very close and placing a cool hand on my shoulder to calm me. "The scent is several hours old."

Several hours! I sat back down heavily in the chair, my heart racing. Had Niall come for me earlier when I was out with Lucas? Or had that handsome Cyril decided to pop in for that chat he wanted? Either way, it was definitely not a good thing that a Fae had decided to pop into my home, uninvited, right? I wondered briefly if Amelia had a spell that could ward the house against fairies.

"I have to call Eric," I said absently, and I headed toward my bedroom to get my cell phone. I flipped on the light, grabbed up my cell phone and flipped it open to see that I had five missed calls and the message symbol was flashing on the screen.

"Sookie, is something wrong?" Bill asked. He had followed me into the bedroom, and was now standing by my shoulder. I glanced at him and saw his fangs were down; clearly he was picking up on my anxiousness and was also perhaps expecting trouble.

"Nothing is wrong," I murmured as I scrolled through the call log on my phone to see whose calls I had missed. "Except that my Great-Grandfather is trying to marry me off to some pure blooded fairy so I can make little Fae babies."

I had missed a call from Amelia, two from Eric and three from a number I didn't recognize. I cursed myself for not having my phone on me and I was just about to dial the numbers to retrieve my messages when I noticed Bill had gone completely still. I glanced at him.

"Does Eric know about this?" he asked me and I rubbed a hand over my eyes in exasperation.

"Yes, he knows. He said he'd take care of it."

"How?" Bill demanded, and that was the fifty thousand dollar question.

"I have no idea," I said, and I sat down on my bed and started listening to my messages. Bill started to say something else but I held up a finger, asking him to hold on.

The first message was from Amelia, she was just checking in, but before I could listen to the whole thing my house phone began to ring. I tossed my cell onto the bed and hurried into the kitchen and snatched up the wall phone.

"Hello?"

"I'm on my way," Eric said without preamble, and just hearing his voice made me smile and my chest swell with affection. "Why didn't you answer your cell phone?"

"I forgot to bring it with me," I said and there was an extended silence on the other end.

"Where did you go?"

"I'll explain later. Look, there was a fairy in my house today while I was gone."

"How do you know?"

"Bill can smell him. Or her. He said the scent was only a few hours old."

Silence ensued on the other end of the line for several long moments. I glanced at Bill and saw he was wearing an amused expression. I mouthed the word 'what' at him and right then Eric answered my question.

"Why is Compton in your house?" he asked, and his voice was low and rumbling.

I restrained myself from taking the phone and bashing it against the wall a few times in frustration. Was it possible he could put his vampire territorial crap on the back burner for one night?

"Sookie!" he demanded.

I guessed not.

"I invited him in after he brought me home!" I said, and I noticed Bill had turned away from me. I glared at his back. He was laughing; I just knew it.

"I'll be there in five minutes," Eric said. "We'll talk then."

"Well, okay," I said in a snip. But it didn't matter; he had already hung up on me. I slammed the phone down with a growl.

Bill looked at me again, and his face was expressionless but his eyes were still dancing with delight.

"You enjoyed that, didn't you?" I accused.

"Yes."

I expected him to say more, but he didn't. I noticed he was holding a now-empty bottle of True Blood and I asked him if he wanted a refill.

"No, thank you. I'll stay with you until Eric arrives, then I'll need to be getting back home."

"Yeah," I teased, "the kids have been alone for a long time. Wonder what they found to do while you were here? I'm sure they're just playing Wii, or watching a movie..."

"Sookie," Bill said in a warning tone, and I smiled innocently.

Right then I heard the sound of tires on gravel, and my heart leapt in my chest and I couldn't contain the smile or the rush of happiness that washed over me when I felt Eric. I went to the door and opened it, and in a flash my vampire was inside, looking beautiful with his trademark jeans and dark shirt. He was wearing his hair loose tonight, and it trickled down his back and shoulders, contrasting wildly with his black leather jacket.

He eyed me, then turned his gaze to Bill, who was already making his way to the door.

"Eric," Bill said with a tiny smile as he passed by him.

"Bill," Eric replied, and the way he said it was like the name left a bad taste in his mouth.

"Glad we all know one another," I muttered. Men.

"Sookie, thank you...for everything," Bill said, the hard-to-miss implications in the words and tone clearly meant as a taunt. Eric bared his fangs, but Bill - wisely - made his departure at vampire speed.

I shut the door and locked it, then turned to Eric who was still fuming silently.

"Knock it off," I said, and I wrapped my arms around Eric's waist and lay my head on his chest. It took him a minute, but then he put his arms around me, too; I then lifted my face to his for some soft, gentle kisses, but Eric pulled away and stood up straight.

"This is twice now I've smelled his scent on you," he told me, his eyes hard and his grip on my waist a little too tight.

I almost said something smart, but then considered that Eric was possibly feeling a little protective, maybe even insecure, what with Niall trying to hook me up with a Fairy and all. I wiggled up against him and ran my hands up his back and smiled. "I know a way we can get rid of that scent," I said with as much seduction in my voice as I could muster.

Eric stepped back and placed one hand under my chin, lifting my face and looking at me with hard eyes.

"If I can smell another vampire on you, others can as well."

I frowned up at him and sighed. "Eric..."

"I won't be made a fool of," he said, and his voice left no room for debate.

"What would you like me to do?" I questioned, feeling a little hurt. "There is nothing going on between me and Bill. He touched me one time, just for a second, when I got scared about the fairy smell. It's no big deal."

"It is a very big deal for me," Eric said. "You are mine. I am Sheriff. Certain behaviors will not be tolerated. I'll have words with Bill."

I shook my head. "He's my neighbor. He's also my friend and I don't want him acting the way Rasul acted the night he was over here."

"With respect?"

"With fear," I clarified. "I didn't like that."

"You would like it far less if I was forced to punish Bill or Rasul for an honor violation," Eric said, raising his eyebrows.

"Excuse me? You would punish Bill for _touching_ me? Even if it was innocent?"

Eric didn't answer, he just looked at me for a long time. His stillness was a little disconcerting, and I shifted a little as I wondered what was going on behind those ice blue eyes. I felt my mood start to plummet in the silence. I had been wanting to see him so much, and now that he was here, we were arguing. And worse, we were arguing - yet again - over a difference in opinion that lay in the great rift between human and vampire life.

Just as I felt like I was going to tear up, Eric came to me and pulled me into his arms. I felt the tension fizzle away, his cool embrace acting as a pressure release valve for my negativity.

"I've upset you," he said, and I nodded my head against his chest. He was feeling conflicted, I could sense it clear as day. He was a little angry and a tad confused, probably at how best to proceed. I smiled a little, appreciating his hesitation. It meant he was taking me seriously; he was taking my feelings seriously. That was relationship progress, right?

He held me away after a moment, and then sat down in the big recliner and pulled me into his lap. I rested my head on his shoulder and breathed him in, feeling content just to be with him.

"Felipe' de Castro sent word that he would be coming to Louisiana at the end of the month," Eric said after a few minutes. "I briefed him on the status of Fangtasia. We think the rebuilding will be complete by then. Pam is working on publicity now, and the King would like to be here for the Grand Re-Opening."

"That's great," I said with a grin. Not necessarily the part about the King coming, but I knew Eric would be happy to have his bar up and running again.

"You will need to be there, too," Eric said, and I looked into his face.

"Sure, I'll come if you want me to. Let me know the date and I'll see if I can get off work that night..."

"You'll be off work," Eric said, sounding pretty certain. "If there's a problem, I'll speak to the shifter myself."

"Not a good idea," I said. "You aren't exactly on Sam's list of favorite people these days."

"I wasn't aware I ever was," Eric said ruefully, then he turned serious. "The King will expect to see you. As my..." Eric hesitated as though he were searching for words. "He believes us to have a covenant. The night of the Fangtasia opening, you will be at my side."

I lay my head back down on Eric's shoulder and nuzzled him a little.

"I understand," I said softly. "I'll be there. I promise."

"And you cannot wear the scent of another vampire when you arrive, lover," Eric said. "There can be no more of these so-called innocent incidents."

"What do you mean '_so-called_'?" I asked, my voice rising. "What are you trying to accuse me of?"

"I'm accusing you of nothing. I'm warning you that if Felipe' or one of his crew catches the trace of another vampire on my..." he hesitated again, and I sighed.

"On your wife," I finished for him. "It's okay, you can say it. As long as we both know we're just playing dress-up here."

He nodded. "On my wife, it will be assumed it is not there by accident. Or by innocence."

"They'll assume I was running around on you, is that what you're saying?" I asked.

"They will assume that I have not been doing my job as Sheriff if another vampire thinks he can lay hands on what belongs to me. If Felipe' was here right now, and he smelled Compton on you, I would have no choice but to punish Bill severely for his actions."

"Even when you know nothing happened between us?" I asked, astounded. "You would do what? Kick his ass for comforting me? To save face? Do you have any idea how insane that sounds?"

"Lover, vampires do not touch one another very often, you know this. We don't shake hands, we don't hug or kiss in greeting. And we rarely come into physical contact with a human unless we're feeding."

"Or having sex? Or tossing them across the bar?" I asked with a smirk.

"Or that, yes. This is very important, Sookie. I'm asking you to be more prudent in your actions. Will you agree to this?"

"I'll...try," I said weakly, trying hard to wrap my head around yet another foreign vampire custom. "I don't want anyone getting hurt on account of me."

"Excellent," Eric said, and I felt a bubble of satisfaction drift through the bond.

"What was that?" I demanded, sitting up. "Happy because you won this one?"

Eric raised his brows. "Pleased that we seemed to have resolved this small matter without your striking me."

I buried my face back into his shoulder, embarrassed at the reminder of my emotional and physical outburst from the night before.

"Speaking of last night," I began hesitantly, almost unsure that I wanted to delve into this conversation. "Did you come up with any ideas about...the thing with Niall?"

"As a matter of fact I did," Eric said, and I could hear the smile in his voice and the rumble in his chest as he spoke. "I'm surprised it took you this long to ask."

It actually surprised me, too, since the issue had been in the fore of my mind since last night. But Eric had started in on me the minute he walked in the door, basically using me as a vampire scratch-and-sniff toy.

"You side-tracked me," I said defensively.

"Pam called one of Niall's Fae last night," Eric said, and this piqued my curiosity and I tilted my head to look at him. "She relayed a message for me to Niall, letting him know I possibly had an alternate and more, shall we say, lucrative proposal for him. And Niall left word through one of my staff today that he would be willing to meet with me."

"So your people called his people..." I giggled.

"Yes," he said, clearly not seeing why I was amused. I shook my head and he continued on.

"One of the terms I set was that neither he, nor any of his Fae, would attempt to contact you until he and I spoke privately."

"Really?" I asked, feeling skeptical. "He agreed to that?"

Eric's lips curved up a little. "He did, after adding in his own condition."

"Which was?"

"That I not turn you, which would of course render you useless to him."

"Render me useless," I said softly. "That's just great. Glad I mean so much to him."

We sat in silence for a minute or so while I let this turn of event settle in. Eric stroked my back, I wanted to think it was in a comforting way, but he didn't speak. I didn't blame him; after all, what can you say to a person that just found out their greatest value was in their ability to reproduce?

"Thank you," I said after a bit and I kissed Eric on the cheek. I was still feeling the sting of hurt, but on the bright side I felt as though an enormous weight had been lifted from my shoulders. It was liberating, so much so that even though I knew I should press Eric on the details of his _alternate proposal,_ I decided I simply didn't care. He had, at the very least, bought me some time; time that I didn't have to worry about being taken away into another realm. I was learning to take what I could get these days.

"So I really don't have to worry about Niall coming for me?" I asked.

"As I told you," he stated firmly, "when a Fae gives their word, they keep it."

"Hmmph. So I guess the fairy that was in my house today wasn't Niall, then," I mused softly.

"It's important we find out," Eric said, sounding a little upset. "Though I'm certain Niall passed on the orders for his Fae to stay clear of you, there is nothing that says one of them might decide to disobey him."

The way he said _one of them_, made it pretty obvious he was referring to Cyril. I smiled a little.

"Maybe it was just Claudine," I shrugged.

Even if Niall had agreed to keep his people away from me, for now, I doubted that would apply to Claudine, since she was my guardian. I thought back to the first time I had met my gorgeous Fae cousin, when she had woken me up when I fell asleep at the wheel of my car...

_Car!_

"Oh!" I exclaimed, suddenly remembering that Eric and I had a little something else we needed to dicuss. Eric looked at me curiously while I disengaged from him and walked across the room to get the keys to the new car keys out of my purse.

"What's this all about?" I demanded, shaking the keys, causing them to jingle loudly.

Eric grinned broadly. "You needed a new car, Bill needed a way home from Mississippi. I'm sorry if it's not to your liking, it's the best Russell had to spare. We can trade it in if you would like something different."

My mouth dropped open and I threw the keys at Eric. He caught them easily in one hand.

"I don't need a new car," I stated and I crossed my arms over my chest. "And I'm not going to have you going out and buying me expensive things. I'm not with you for your money."

"I know that," he said with a smirk. "You're with me for the sex."

"Hardly," I retorted, then shrugged. "Though the sex is definitely in the top ten reasons..."

"Really?" he asked, looking intrigued. Then he was up and hauling me into his arms and walking me backwards to the wall.

"Just the top ten?" he asked, and he pressed heavily against me, moving a little.

"Maybe the top five," I amended, and he smiled down at me in a fangy way and held the keys up, dangling them in the air about six inches above my head.

"You_ do_ need a new car, lover," he said, smiling. "Allow me to help you. Allow me to care for you."

"I don't want to be a kept woman," I said, but the look in Eric's eye and the intensity of the feelings flowing through out bond was chipping away at my conviction.

"You are _my_ woman," Eric said, his eyes glowing. "I won't be having you go without things you need. And I won't be having you seen driving to the Fangtasia opening in..."

"Don't you dare say it," I warned him, cutting him off. "Don't you dare say this about your image, Sheriff!"

Eric hesitated for a moment. "It's not about my image," he said, and he was anything but convincing.

I cocked my head at him. "Are you lying?"

"Partially."

"Right," I stated, biting off the word. "So what's next? Are you going to dress me up in clothes that cost thousands of dollars and shower me with jewels? Maybe give me a platinum card?"

Eric stood back a bit and look at me dubiously. "You would want these things?"

I sighed, exasperated. "No! Of course I don't!"

"I thought not," he said, smiling, and he took my hand and placed the keys in my open palm and closed it. "Accept my gift, lover," he said gently. "It's the first I've given you since you agreed to be my woman, that hardly makes you kept."

I was opening my mouth to protest but then Eric leaned down and placed a finger on my lips, silencing me.

"You work after dark," he continued, "and I do not enjoy the thought of you driving alone so late in a questionable vehicle." He stepped in very close, leaned down and started to kiss and nuzzle my neck. "Who knows what sort of shady characters you might encounter running down the road some night..."

I felt his smile against my skin and I felt the wind in my indignation fizzling away. I understood full well that I was being stubborn, and if I was being honest with myself I would have to admit that having a low mileage, newer car would be a nice change and one less thing to worry about. I released a long breath and looked down and the keys in my hand.

"Alright," I said, pushing on his shoulders so he would look at me directly. "I'll take the car. But the next time you decide I need something, will you at least ask me about it before you just go out and buy it?"

"It's important to you?"

"Yes," I said, touching his cheek. "It really is. I want to have a say in my own life. Okay?"

"Very well," he said, agreeing much faster and easier than I would have guessed. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him over and over, feeling warmth spreading throughout my entire body. At some point, Eric picked me up and I encircled my legs around his waist, which made things a little easier, considering the differences in our height.

"Are you going to stay with me tonight?" I asked, when my lips were finally free for a few seconds.

"Mmmmm," he answered, which really wasn't an answer but sent chills up my spine because he was using his tongue on my ear while he said it.

"Why don't you come back to Shreveport with me?" he asked after a moment, and he looked into my eyes. "Come to my home. Stay there with me."

I tried and failed to hide my surprise at his request. Eric had never spoken of his home, or even where he lived; he'd certainly never invited me there before. For all I knew, he had some underground batcave somewhere. And as much as I was curious, as much I would have loved to go home with Eric, I knew it was impossible. At least tonight.

"I can't," I said, and I hoped he saw the regret in my eyes. "I have to call Sam in the morning. And Amelia. I've missed so much work..."

"Give the shifter your notice."

"Excuse me?" I said, my eyes growing wide. "I'm not quitting my job, Eric."

"I'll provide for you," he said, and he started kissing my neck again. I felt his fangs graze my skin.

"Didn't we _just_ have this conversation?" I said, and I tried to sound firm though inside my heart was fluttering around. He had offered me this before, in a way, and I had turned him down because I knew it really wasn't _Eric_ offering. But this time it _was_, and it was hard not to feel flattered.

"You don't wish to lose your independence," he whispered into my skin.

"Exactly," I agreed gently, and I held his head so I could look him in the face. "I do appreciate your offer. It's very sweet, but I'm not ready to quit my job and have you carry me off into the sunset. Okay?"

He didn't reply, just gave me a little knowing smile that didn't do a thing to convince me this was the last I'd be hearing on the subject. I wiggled out of his arms, suddenly feeling thirsty.

"Do you want a blood?" I asked, feeling a bit rude for not having offered before. "I need a little something myself."

"Thank you," he said, and he followed me into the kitchen and watched while I pulled a True Blood out of the refrigerator for him.

"You surprise me," Eric said suddenly, and I glanced over at him while I popped the bottle into the microwave.

"How so?"

He smiled and leaned against the counter and crossed his arms over his chest. "You haven't asked anything else about the situation with Niall."

I shrugged, surprised at this sudden change in the conversation.

"Usually you would be demanding answers, insisting that I explain my actions." He continued and looked at me speculatively. "You aren't curious as to what I'm offering him?"

"I am," I said slowly, knowing that Eric's was quite right. "I guess I _should_ be asking you what you're up to..." I trailed off, trying to figure out in my own head why I was content to leave Eric to his own devices all of a sudden.

"And why aren't you?" Eric pressed. I could feel something stirring in the bond, something akin to hope.

I considered that silently for a few moments. It wasn't like there was a whole lot I could really do with this mess. Eric had admitted to me in the past he wasn't well versed in Fae politics, but I figured he had to at least know more that I did; I knew precious little about my Great-Grandfather and how he and his kind thought and acted. And Eric, being a vampire Sheriff, was certainly in a more powerful position than I was to negotiate with Niall.

The microwave beeped and I handed the bottle of blood to Eric.

"You told me to trust you, right?" I asked him, though it wasn't really a question. "So I'm trusting you. Don't get used to it, though," I added with a smile.

Just then the blood bond practically exploded with pride and happiness emanating from Eric, so powerful it actually sent a shiver up my spine. He had me in his arms in a heartbeat, looking down into my face with eyes dancing.

"You're allowing me to care for you," he said. "Finally."

"I'm not so sure that's such a good thing," I said, not really getting why this was such a big deal to him. "This is my problem, after all, not yours."

"It takes a very strong person to relinquish responsibility to another; to trust someone else with their very life."

"Really?" I asked, sounding dubious. "To be honest I feel a little like a coward for letting you take care of this for me."

"You're one of the strongest women I have ever met," Eric stated. "Never believe yourself to be a coward."

"Okay," I amended. "Maybe that wasn't the right word. I guess I just feel weak, like I don't have the juice to do anything. I know you have...well, you have ways of getting what you want. So I'll let you do what you need to do. I know you'll get me out of this if you can."

"I will, yes," Eric agreed, and he picked up the blood and took a long drink, licking his lips afterward.

"You have given me your trust freely," Eric mused, smiling. But then after a moment, his face turned serious. "And I willingly accept it, along with the responsibility that comes with it."

He paused then, and looked at me with one of those slightly eerie vampire fixed stares. I stared right back, pondering his words, and trying to decipher the meaning behind them. What responsibility?

I noticed that Eric was still motionless, and there was a current of hesitation laced with resolve streaming through the bond, and I new it wasn't coming from my end. Eric was trying to make a decision, I decided.

"You want to tell me something, don't you?" I asked him, though I was already sure of the answer.

His cheek twitched a little, but other than that he showed no response.

"You do," I said, pleased by his reaction. I was on to something here, and with a supreme effort I tried to pinpoint the other emotions I was picking up from him. "You're...worried about my reaction, aren't you?"

My voice was rising a little with excitement - not because Eric apparently had something important he wanted to tell me, but because for the first time I felt as though he and I were on somewhat equal footing in regards to the blood bond. I was _reading_ him, the same way he always seemed to be able to read me. And I bit my tongue to keep from laughing out loud when another emotion hit me.

"You don't like this, do you?" I said, grinning. "You enjoy having the upper hand..." I trailed off when I saw Eric's face turn hard, and then I couldn't stop the laughter from rolling over me.

"Oh, my God!" I said, almost tearing up. "You _hate_ this!"

Eric just glared at me while I got my giggles under control. I wondered if this was how he felt all the time around me. Since I had stopped fighting the bond, I had been getting better at internalizing the emotions I felt through it, and sorting through them, but this was the first time I had managed to take the next step and really decipher with some accuracy what Eric was thinking. It wasn't like telepathy, since I couldn't hear words, but it might be almost as good with a little practice.

Eric still hadn't spoken, and I put my arms around his neck and smiled up at him.

"You wanted to have a blood bond," I reminded him. "You wanted to tie yourself to me for, what was it? One hundred years? Having a change of heart, are we?"

"No."

He clearly wasn't in the mood to play with me, so I released my grip on him and shook my head. I stepped back and opened up the refrigerator and took out a can of soda and popped it open.

"Ok, so what are you wanting to tell me?" I asked him after I took a drink.

Eric still looked serious, and it was starting to make me a little nervous. This wasn't just about my newfound ability to read him via the bond, there was something else going on here.

"I wasn't going to make you aware of the offer I am planning to make Niall to get him to release you from your obligation to him," Eric stated. "It may not agree with your human values, and I didn't want to upset you."

"Okay," I said slowly. _Definitely_ feeling nervous now.

"But you told me you want to have a say in your own life..."

"That's right," I said cautiously, wondering where this was leading.

"And I don't wish to betray the trust you've given me," he went one, and it seemed like he was choosing his words with care. "In this matter, you may consider my methods to be distasteful. I risk your anger by revealing my offer. But if I keep it from you, you may view it as a lie of omission."

I considered that the last _lie of omission_ dealt with that ceremonial knife, and that was pretty darn big! I placed the soda can on the counter and braced myself. This must be the responsibility thing Eric mentioned earlier. I had a sinking feeling I was about to get more than I bargained for when I told Eric I wanted him to be honest with me.

I remembered what I once told Bill, that I would rather be given a hard truth than an easy lie. Did I really mean that? Well, here was the chance to find out. I reminded myself, too, that this was a very big step for Eric, who had spent the better part of a millennia doing exactly what he wanted without the need or desire to discuss it with anyone else. I was about to get a very rare sneak peek at the inner workings of vampire maneuvering. I shuddered.

"Alright," I said, almost cringing inside. "Let's hear it. What are you planning to offer Niall?"

Eric stepped closer to me.

"Another of his line he clearly isn't aware of, or he would have already made a move to obtain him. A male heir that appears to hold the same essential spark as you. One that can give him the descendants he desires; more than you would be able to provide."

"Who?" I breathed, staring wide-eyed at Eric.

"Your cousin," he said softly.

…


End file.
